So I have a crush on two brothers who live in my apartment building

This will end in tears.

“They seem to get nervous around me. I road the elevator with one of them ...”

I’m guessing that you are the equivalent of 9 people of the 10 person limit in that elevator.

"They both have girlfriends but I get strong vibes from them. "

Congratulations on your continuing pursuit of barely available men. A lifetime of frustration and unhappiness await you and each victory will be more pyrrhic than the last.

Kudos to you for finding the key to misery.

Delusions play tricks on the mind

OH THIS IS BULLSHIT!!!

Maybe you are a little too obvious with your crush, and that's why they act nervous, and the girlfriends act weird

I LOVE situations like these! When I sense a guy is nervous around me, I purposely start being nice as can be whenever I see them (but not flirty). Eventually they feel at ease and start loosening up.

No wonder they hate us.

Marriage is between a man and a woman.

[quote]No wonder they hate us.

The stuff we read about in the news proves they hate us no matter how much we try to “behave” anyway, so who cares anymore?

They're both sooooo hot.

I wanna talk to one of them. One of them is definitely interested in me. Why, I don't know.

They may be Brazilian. I couldn't figure out what language they were speaking in the elevator.

OP, perhaps you could invite them over for cocktails, making sure you have plenty of booze on hand. Tell them that you wish their girl friends could join but you have limited space. I'm sure it goes without saying, but I'll say anyway, leave your caftan in the closet and wear something a bit more butch. Let the fun begin!

Boa sorte!

The girlfriend pawing reminds me of when Bruno is at that Swingers party and that girl starts screaming about “why would he want that? He’s straight! Why would he want that, when he got this pussy right here?!”

I cannot wait for the next episode of this tragi-comic saga! Will hapless deluded OP get his ass thrown off his very own balcony?

Just tell them you wanna suck them off. If the bjs aren't the best they've ever received you will give them $100.

You ROAD the elevator??

They were probably nervous the lift would break down with your immense weight in it, OP.

I'm fit you cunts

OP, fit or not, don't shit where you eat. Think what it would be like to ride the elevator with these two and their gfs if you have gotten your signals crossed.

Duh.

So, OP, so it could be that they are both so, like, totally gay, but they’re completely repelled by a ditzy queen who opens a sentence with “So”.

[quote]They seem to get nervous around me

My uncle had a dog like that. Yes, good old Uncle Armless

A few days ago I jacked off to one of them in my head. Now I'm seeing them everywhere. Power of attraction?

[quote]They both have girlfriends but I get strong vibes from them. They seem to get nervous around me.

No, they get strong vibes from you. Then see the second sentence.

Do you know which apartment they’re in? Slip a note under the door that just says “Yum. Come to Mama.” That ought to make them feel more relaxed.

Ask one of them if your caftan makes you look fat.