BREAKING: Felicity Huffman sentenced to 14 days in prison

ONE TWO THREE FOUR

THE ANIMAL, THE ANIMAL

I gotta get out

I gotta get out

I gotta get out

How'd I get in this slammer,

This cooler,

This big dollhouse!

Jail, not prison.

That's a man, baby!

She’s trans, so put her in the men’s prison.

So does this make her a convicted felon? Is she allowed to vote anymore?

Take it up with CNN, r3. They were the ones who posted "prison."

Let's go to a live shot of the police picking Felicity up for her two-week stretch.

Seriously, they couldn't even do a full month? Jesus Christ.

I hope Lori gets more time than this - a LOT more. $500k to get your bratty daughters into university and then pretending like she was innocent after the fact. She and her husband deserve several years in prison at least.

As usual, money (and celebrity) talks, and regular (not white) people do five years in prison for getting their son into a better middle school.

I will get 30.

R10, I agree. I think Huffman did a lot less and she at least acted remorseful.

I hope the Loris are shitting bricks now.

It's like a short trip to rehab.

How much will Lori Laughlin get for her half million bribe? Huffman only greased someone's palm with &15,000.

She will likely not even serve the whole fourteen days for overcrowding.

Lori Loughlin is going down!

Thank God, poor Lynette did not deserve to be locked up away from her learning disabled children for years!

[quote]I hope Lori gets more time than this - a LOT more.

What?

Bye, felicity.

Lori won’t be convicted. The jury will give Aunt Becky a pass.

Why do we even have to have math skills anyway? I blame math!

Wait, let me oh dear myself. Lori, not Felicity.

R15 And apparently her daughter has a legit learning disability, not just 2 spoiled rotten, narcissistic assholes like Olivia Jade and the other one.

This won't affect her career at all. All the publicity aimed more interested eyeballs on her - those that didn't watch Desperate Housewives.

She'll do a high-profile post-interview with Diane Sawyer or Gayle King, be on the cover of People magazine - all the while promoting her upcoming movies and series appearances.

White tears.

r3 Wasn't this a federal court? Is it still the same?

Can Lori still cut a deal after seeing this?

AP got it right. CNN is so lazy.

[quote]BREAKING: Felicity Huffman gets 14 days in jail in admissions scandal.

Well, she's no Martha Stewart. Who knows how well she'll hold up in the can.

How long does she have to be contrite about this? Other celebs have done far worse. Charlie Sheen held a knife to his wife's throat! No jail time for him.

Huffman played it cleverly. I noticed that she seemingly abstained from fillers and Botox, just to look more relatable to the Fraus. Public opinion counts you know?

On the other hand, I want that entitled cunt Loughlin to get 14 years behind bars, specifically without Botox, fillers, face peels, plastic surgery, HRT, makeup, haircuts, no nothing! Can't wait to see Lori Laughlines trying to sneak under a hood at night out of the prison.

That other bitch BETTER do time.

All things considered 14 days in jail is not too bad. It's not as if she's a murderer or a child molester. In the scheme of things what she did was relatively minor league. I'm glad they weren't too tough on her.

Why is she saying that she wanted her daughter to get a fair shake? She’s acting like the kid was raised in the hood by a crack mom instead of Brentwood.

Felicity Huffman’s “L’il ol’ me” act is so tiresome. Wasn’t her father a VP at Merrill Lynch or something?

The odds she must have overcome!

Her parents are very wealthy and she grew up a privileged life. She went to Interlochen Art Academy in Michigan, and easily could have bought enrollment for her daughter there based on her alumni status and fame.

Because the daughter has a learning disability.

She must have confided her scheme to Bill Macy at some point. Wouldn't he been an accomplice?

Will she pull the full 14 days straight or do "weekend jail" which is 8 hours on Saturdays and Sundays of supervised community service?

Will she ever get an Oscar?

[quote]I think Huffman did a lot less and she at least acted remorseful.

She acted remorseful BECAUSE SHE GOT CAUGHT.

Fuck her. She should have done hard time. What Huffman did was far worse than Loughlin. Hence the phony baloney apology.

Rich, white people justice. A homeless black woman lied that she had an address so her kid could go to kindergarten and she got 5 years! Fuck this country. BTW, I'm white.

But she said she was sorry! R41

Is Lori still pleading not guilty? Is she hoping theres some hallmark fraus on the jury?

I'll give her ½ ⭐ for admitting her guilt, but she deserves at last 6 months behind bars, but I'll settle for three.

Lori Laughlin had the arrogance to plead NOT GUILTY. She better wear her Big Girl PullUps to court.

In addition, both of these mortal sinning failed bribery specialists should be required to make a hefty donation to the Darfur Orphan College Fund.

I am personally outraged by their behavior. I may possibly be suffering from LOHESD ( Lack Of Higher Education Stress Disorder)

I may have to seek treatment, possibly even file a lawsuit for unlimited Happy Meals. I shouldn't have to suffer from both lack of food 🍔 🍟 and lack of education 📚.

What will her prison stay look like? I assume she'll be going to a minimum security prison and will likely be kept separate from the general population.

Did Lynette protect Tom?

[quote]both of these mortal sinning failed bribery specialists should be required to make a hefty donation to the Darfur Orphan College Fund.

The details of my Swiss bank account are widely known.

A lot of rich (and middle class people) get their kids diagnosed with "learning disabilities" to get then accommodations that they don't actually need.

All I care about is Lori Loughlin doing hard time. I hope they get years.

That instagram post of Olivia Jade flipping off the camera now has over 400k likes. Just...why?

I honestly think the letters she included from Eva Longoria, Marc Cherry and her own were detrimental to her case, and likely guaranteed jail time.

Eva Longoria would know absolutely nothing about the situation, and her letter was like dangling a shiny, famous object in front of the judge, who gained her own personal correspondence souvenir from a Hollywood celebrity!

People barely remember Martha Stewart did time.

I even forgot Teresa Giudice did time.

Kim Foxx could have gotten her off.

Martha Stewart would have never done her "Martha and Snoop" series or talked openly about smoking weed before she went to jail.

She actually did gain street cred. She started booking cooler guests, and is a regular on the late-night comedy skit circuit.

Where is the crotch dropping going to school?

[quote]That instagram post of Olivia Jade flipping off the camera now has over 400k likes. Just...why?

Since OJ was privy to the whole deception (posing with athletic equipment/not filling out her application and having others do it), why is she not also considered for fraudulent charges?

Does there seem to be an emergence of smug individuals "flipping off" those (who seem to genuinely be conscientious) with bizarre cult-like support of others? As exemplified by:

-OJ and Higher Education and those that worked via their own merit - Markle and The Queen and Brit taxpayers - Trump and The Constitution and The American public - Bolsonaro and France and The Amazon

It's as though we are living amongst smug savages. Were these type of people always present? And now more visible? Or are there more.....?

"Aunt Becky" trending on Twitter again. 😂

Some 20 year old copywriter at CNN who doesn't know the difference between jail and prison wrote that article.

They'll probably let her walk into the jail, get booked, sit in a cell for an hour then leave. The car that delivers her to the jail will still be waiting outside.

Frankly, rather than jail they should hurt these people where they'll really feel it. HUGE fines

Huge fines that could fund scholarships.

Twitter is in its usual tizzy about the short sentence. Will it be Felicity Huffman of all people who starts the second civil war?

I do feel a little bad for her, though.

Exactly r48. Just admit your kid fucked off during school and got bad grades, thereby screwing their chances of getting into a decent school.

This kid is going to appear on Shameless any second now (if she hasn’t already) in a three episode arc, we all know it, so why not just stick her in acting classes?

I hope Lori Loughlin gets six months no probation.

Mossimo Giannulli is going to get so much surprise anal, he's going to be shitting slurpees.

The criminal behind bars doesn't care whether you call it prison time or jail time. They just want out.

And now must we properly differentiate between 🐣JailBirds and 🦅PrisonBirds ?

Felicity and Lori basically committed the same crime. The difference in money is incidental. Once you reach a certain level of money, it's all a felony.

Wherever she (or the rest of them) goes she'll be completely separated from the regular jail trash. Of that you can be assured.

Huffman will report to CyberJail every evening between the hours of Midnight thru 6:00 a.m.

No refreshments allowed.

R11 and R41: The homeless lady was in ConnecticutHer name was Tonya, it was also in conjunction with a drug and she took a plea deal and I’m black

I'm guessing that the Laughlin bitches won't be attending any institute of Higher Learning in the near future.

#WhitePrivilege trending on Twitter because of her low sentence.

Ewww R61, you’re ruining slurpees for me!

Can she just trade the 14 days for an ankle bracelet at home for a Month? How does the prison jewelry thing work?

It will revive her career! She now has street cred!

if 15k = 2 wks in Jail...How much time will Lori do? Get cracking! This is a test!

#moneyprivilege is more like it, don’t you think?

I doubt there are any poor white people in Appalachia who are spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on bribes for college admissions and then even more money on defense lawyers.

R73:Exactly

I don't think Huffman deserved more than she got. Sounds fair to me. Prison for a 15k bribe to fix sat scores? Cmon.

[quote] Where she goes is ultimately up to the Bureau of Prisons and has not been announced. Huffman’s attorney said in court today that he has requested a facility near Huffman's California home.

It's sad how many media outlets don't seem to realize that prison and jail are different things.

Such lazy journalism.

Sounds like prison to me. And it's decided by the "Bureau of Prisons".

And somewhere Lori Loughlin is sipping champagne and saying, “I’m more attractive, as are my kids. I’m America’s Sweetheart, so I’m going to get off with a fine.”

Recent Instagram post from Olivia Jade.

The fucking little privileged POS.

I really wish everyone would stop acting like Huffman was charged with murder.

She 'fessed up, she has accepted responsibility, she will do her time, pay her fines, do her community service and she doesn't sound like a terrible person.

[quote]"I broke the law. I have admitted that and I pleaded guilty to this crime. There are no excuses or justifications for my actions. Period," Huffman said in the statement. "I would like to apologize again to my daughter, my husband, my family and the educational community for my actions. And I especially want to apologize to the students who work hard every day to get into college, and to their parents who make tremendous sacrifices supporting their children."

[quote]"I can promise you that in the months and years to come that I will try and live a more honest life, serve as a better role model for my daughters and family and continue to contribute my time and energies wherever I am needed," Huffman said. "My hope now is that my family, my friends and my community will forgive me for my actions."

Pretty smart. Apology taking absolutely full responsibility with no equivocation or justification. No excuses. Outright admission of wrongdoing. She's staked out space that really has only room for one person in the public's share of mind. She doesn't try to mitigate her actions or put any blame anywhere else. She doesn't try to sound relatable by suggesting she did it "out of a mother's love" or other pablum.

She may actually recover from this. Helps that her kid doesn't seem to be torpedoing her.

[quote]Felicity and Lori basically committed the same crime. The difference in money is incidental.

Lori bribed college employees for direct admission into a particular college, while Felicity "only" bribed someone for a better SAT score, significantly increasing chances of admission to good colleges. They didn't go about it the same way. In terms of the crime, legally speaking, that might be considered the same type of mail fraud or whatever, I don't know, but I see that "conspiracy to commit money laundering" has also been added to the charges against Lori (and not Felicity).

So is it a actually a prison where she will be going r78? WaPo headline says jail.

I guess when they say where she is going we will know if it is a county jail or a prison.

This sentence is foolish. Nonviolent offenders should NEVER be in prison. Cory Booker said so last night.

Well said R82.

[quote] The Federal Bureau of Prisons (BOP) is a law enforcement agency responsible for the custody, control, and care of individuals incarcerated in the federal prison system of the United States,

Prison, not jail.

Pleading guilty was stupid. Lori is going to win her case, and will never see a prison and will have no record.

R88 Lori would pay millions in bribe money to get only 14 days

I wish Laughlin's bitch daughter would be imprisoned.

That bitch daughter didn’t even want to go to college. What was Aunt Becky thinking?

She'll probably bribe her way out of jail and will be out on good behaviour within 24 hours.

Let's give first dibs on prison cells to violent offenders.

Felicity needs to watch this episode of Charlie’s Angels and take a lesson.

R94 is Twitter right now.

Maybe she can pay someone to do her time.

https://www.snopes.com/news/2019/04/23/admissions-scandal-two-moms/....

I think what R98 meant to say was...

Has Bob issued a statement yet?

I was reading an article in the current Vanity Fair, which said that one family's daughter was put forward as an African-American tennis whiz from a working-class family. In truth, she was white, rich, and didn't play tennis. But this got caught early on, the family insisted the counselor did things without their knowledge, and they skated.

Why'd you do it, Fel? Brown University was founded just to give ivy league degrees to stupid kids of famous parents.

But there must be solid evidence against Lori, that asshole cunt is cooperating so she's fucked. She's definitely going away to the big house.

It just depends what a jury thinks, and no jury will convict Aunt Becky.

It's all about what you can prove in court. Maybe they will buy the jury. Does Aunt Becky have that kind of dough?

Like 99.999% of people give a rats ass about this bullshit. I love how the media is making such a huge deal about this nothing burger,just to keep the sheeple from paying attention to the REAL crimes being committed by our government. Deflect! Deflect!

Learning that Felicity Huffman's daughter has learning disabilities changes my view somewhat on this. Why did it take for today for that to come out? I can see why a mother wanted to somehow level the field for her but obviously it was in the wrong way. But it's not as egregious to me now.

But it's fake disability. they just have a doctor say that so they have extra time for exams.

R105 she has more money than Felicity

I wonder if she will emerge from prison as a lez-bean.

She will.

I wonder what happened to those unnamed CEOs we heard briefly about who paid millions for the same thing?

[quote] It just depends what a jury thinks, and no jury will convict Aunt Becky.

If there are Xers, Boomers, or people from the Silent Generation on that jury, they sure will.

No one over 45 watched "Full House."

This is a travesty of justice! She shouldn't of gotten any jail time. I bet the judge came down on her just because she is famous.

No, I think she's stupid, she will be convicted for sure.

The last thing they want is a rich famous cunt to get away with shit. Times are different now.

I will admit right away that I haven't read all the posts, so if you need to flame me, I understand. On an earlier thread, I said that it was stupid and a waste of time to sentence Felicity to jail or prison (they really are different). A hefty fine could be used to benefit more people. Taking away a person's livelihood is wrong-headed. Yet, I can't fault the logic I've read, that any other (not rich) woman would have been sent to jail. I try to remind myself that Sophia Loren served 17 days in jail, for tax evasion. I've spent time in jail, and I reminded myself that, if Sophia could tough it out, so could I. Anyway, she can always take Martha Stewart's advice, and construct a shank from a pin-tail comb and a pack of Bubblicious gum. I survived a month in jail myself, and I'm a very not-imposing gay man.

I think a month or four months IS more than fair for Huffman! Why does the judge say it wouldn't be a deterrent? Is there real science behind this, or is she just a mind reader?

Taking the SAT exams is a mandatory part for almost EVERY student applying to college and the results are determinative to a student's eventual placement and future. For Felicity Huffman to screw over the system everyone else is forced to oblige by with her money and criminal acts is NOT inconsequential. I don't think a three or four month sentence is unfair to someone who only confessed when their crimes were exposed. I just don't.

We already have a thread on this...

Lynette abused a rat just to prove a point to Tom. She was vicious, that one.

What school did Felicity's daughter get into and what is her status now? anyone know?

R119, I don't know that story, at all. If you can provide a link, so I can help understand your post, I would appreciate it. Honestly. You would turn my opinion on a dime if that actually happened.

She got jail time because the case wasn't tried in the corrupt LA courts, which always let the rich and famous go free.

Did they search her ass for a shank?

It's only 2 fucking weeks, she can pretend it's research for a movie role.

Plus maybe the inmates will be starstruck and will be extra nice to her.

[quote]This is a travesty of justice! She shouldn't of gotten any jail time

And this post is a travesty of the English language.

BOSTON — Felicity Huffman is hoping to avoid serving hard time.

Lawyers for Huffman, who reports to prison on Oct. 25, requested Friday that the actress spend her two weeks behind bars at a minimum-security women’s lockup in northern California dubbed one of the cushiest prisons in the country.

The Federal Correctional Institution Dublin houses 1,235 inmates and sits about 350 miles away from her Los Angeles home.

While it’s ultimately the decision of the Federal Bureau of Prisons, attorney Martin Murphy asked Judge Indira Talwani make the recommendation so the desperate inmate could see her family.

“It’s the closest to Ms. Huffman’s residence,” Murphy said inside the packed courtroom.

As a Dublin inmate, the “Desperate Housewives” star would have to trade her designer duds for the prison’s issued uniform: dowdy khaki clothing marked with her name and inmate number.

Huffman, 56, will have to make her bed each morning in time for a daily 6:30 a.m. inspection and it will be lights out at 10 p.m. daily, according to the inmate handbook.

Husband William H. Macy and her two daughters will be able to visit on Saturday and Sundays between the hours of 8 a.m. and 2 p.m. but will not be able to bring any gifts.

“Visitors may bring a maximum of $35.00 per adult. Money can only be used for the vending machines in the Visiting Room and may not be given to the inmate,” the handbook states.

In 2009, Forbes named the big-house as one of America’s “10 cushiest prisons” — citing the facilities gorgeous bay area weather.

The prison was formerly home to Heidi Fleiss — the “Hollywood Madam” who ran an upscale prostitution ring in Los Angeles — and Sarah Jane Moore, the woman who attempted to assassinate President Gerald Ford. see also 'I am deeply ashamed': Felicity Huffman weeps as judge hands down sentence in admissions scandal

Despite being a sitcom star, Huffman will also be restricted to the $320 monthly commissary limit.

Highlights on the commissary list include the $3.65 pizza kit and the $2.10 two-pack of Oreos.

To kill time, Huffman and her inmate pals can watch movies shown on weekdays at 11 a.m. and 5 p.m.

It’s unclear if the Emmy Award-winner will be put on a work assignment given her short stint behind bars.

Dublin inmates are generally expected to remain on a work assignment for a minimum of 90 days., according to the handbook.

Lawyer Frank Perrone told The Post that Dublin was the most obvious choice because of it’s proximity to her Los Angeles home.

“It’s located 20 miles southeast of Oakland,” said Perrone, a former prosecutor.

He added that the Federal Bureau of Prisons won’t send defendants more than 500 miles from their residence, so there’s no chance she’ll wind up on the East Coast.

f Felicity Huffman wants to survive federal prison, she needs to follow some simple rules — keep your mouth shut, find a “posse” for protection and watch out where you get dressed to avoid any jailhouse propositions, an expert on incarceration said Friday.

“In the bathroom, she should make sure she dresses in the shower, not out in the common area,” said Michael Frantz, a former federal inmate, who runs Jail Time Consulting.

“Some women will be looking for sex or a relationship. And they might think, there’s a nice TV star — that’s a notch on my belt.”

She should also not talk too much and avoid coming off snobby, Frantz said.

“She should be careful not to act like she thinks of herself as better than everyone else. That will not go over well,” said Frantz, who runs Jail Time Consulting.

The 56-year-old former “Desperate Housewives” star — who on Friday was sentenced to two weeks for her role in the sweeping college admissions scandal — has asked to be allowed to serve her time at the Federal Correctional Institution Dublin in Northern California.

It is known as one of America’s cushiest prisons, but she should still be cautious, especially of jailbirds looking cash in on her wealth and fame, he said.

“Watch what you say — and keep a low profile. It’s prison: People are going to want to take advantage of her, especially because she’s rich and has been on TV,” said Frantz, who served roughly three years in prison for tax evasion in 1999.

It’s smart to find a “posse” — a group of pals who have her back. But don’t let them help too much, he warned.

“You don’t want to owe anybody anything,” he said.

“She will need people to loan her some things, like flip flops and shampoo. But she should make sure she pays them back soon; she doesn’t want to be indebted,” he said.

She should also avoid appearing confrontational with prison guards, who may already be prone to hating her because she’s wealthy.

“When guards say ‘jump,’ she should say, ‘how high?’” he advised.

A final decision on where she will stay will be made by the Federal Bureau of Prisons.

Send her off to Alcatraz!

One of those jailbird dykes lays one finger on this woman and her lawyers will sue the rafters off that prison. She will be handled with kid gloves. Its all such a farce considering the venal corruption running rampant in our nations capitol.

Laughlin needs to get at least three years, along with her husband. The way she's acted, the amount of entitlement (equatable to the amount they paid), how disgusting her daughter acts and how she treats college as a party opportunity (when she attends) makes it so much worse than Huffman. Just take a look at her daughter to see the type of person she must actually be, and her daughter is a reflection of her.

One of her tortured moments of life from The Felicity Letters, was that she was the less attractive of the DHW. Her 2 weeks will truly be an uplifting experience. She will be the most beautiful, and don’t we all deserve that!

I cheated on my ACT the old-fashioned way by re-creating the pattern on my scantron of the apparently very smart girl diagonally to my left.

Loughlin's husband, the "designer" should be forced to produce and sell his fabulous designs @ Walmart for the next twenty years.

R133 Massimo sold his clothing wares at Target, and they cut ties with him a few years ago. A Walmart line would be a blessing from God.

👉 Aunt Becky was fingered by the Feds for her crime.

In the #BigHouse she'll be fingered 🖕 by felons doing time.

Lori had the nerve to sign autographs on her way into court. Bitch gonna fry

Was it his white half's privilege that got Jussie Smollett charged with nothing? It's not being white. It's being rich.

[quote]She must have confided her scheme to Bill Macy at some point. Wouldn't he been an accomplice?

Not only confided. He's on the recorded phone calls. Why the hell isn't he in trouble, too? I see a divorce in their future. What kind of man lets his wife take all the charges and jail time for something they played a role in and had full knowledge of?

R137 Bill has always been the biggest bread winner, plus he has that “ah,shucks “demeanour. Felicity has no public persona.

A coupla NO-TALENTS!

14 days isn’t long enough to knit a poncho.

The next president needs to fucking put a stop to these luxury prisons already. Michael Cohen is playing tennis in his right now, ffs!

Regardless of what one may think of the sentence Felicity Huffman (and poor William H. Macy for that matter) and going to carry the shame of this whole saga for the rest of their lives - more than sufficient punishment.

She'll be out in three days. Maybe she will treat it like doing research for a role like the guys who go to boot camp.

[quote]Rich, white people justice. A homeless black woman lied that she had an address so her kid could go to kindergarten and she got 5 years! Fuck this country.

The problem is that no one deserves five fucking years for something like that.

In this case, Huffman's sentence was appropriate. Giving Huffman years worth of prison time doesn't somehow magically make racism go away.

R118 deserves 14 days in prison for his stupid comment.

Too bad she doesn't know Michelle Obama.

R142 I agree. These days, the social media mob shaming and vilification is part of the punishment for white-collar offenders. It must feel devastating.

[quote] Lori had the nerve to sign autographs on her way into court.

Funny. I didn't notice that. To be fair, though, if she didn't sign, she would have been slammed for snubbing her fans.

God I want to cuntpunch Olivia Jade. Talk about a worthless human being.

I disagree R144. It's a start when a wealthy, white person is given an appropriate jail sentence instead of a slap on the wrist. Is it any wonder when a person of color feels that the justice system is lopsided? And Huffman's crime wasn't victimless. There is a deserving person out there who was denied an education that they wanted so that a spoiled, rich girl could have bragging rights.

Has she been strip searched yet?

This crime is such a non-entity that it does not deserve a jail sentence. Just give her a fine to pay.

Will this be like Paris Hilton who was suppose to spend 45 days in jail but was release in less than 5 days?

Paris Hilton had an outbreak of ass herpes so severe that she was released from prison onto house arrest.

Dear Lori...you're FUUUUCKED.

"Rahmani noted that the Emmy winner’s approach helped: “Felicity certainly benefited from immediately accepting responsibility, not participating in the scheme for [her] younger daughter, and was at the low end of payment in terms of the bribe paid.”

She should go to jail for stealing my nickname.

r15, I'm for Warren this time.

Bernie is the left's Trump.

Wrong thread, R157?

^^^The thread jumped as that was meant for another.

Olivia Jade finally bought a vowel or more likely someone bought it for her, and she deleted the instagram post shown in R80.

I still haven't heard about any of the CEOs who paid millions to do the same thing being charged or prosecuted.

Olivia Jade has no common sense. She better find a really rich man.

Hope Aunt Becky can pull off orange. She dead.

Why even bother deleting the photo after it has been copied and posted everywhere?

Since she is still enrolled at USC to this day, is she taking classes and shit right now?

I thought the nasty whore had dropped out of USC?