Let’s be Sumerian clickbait!

What and where is Ur?

Sex slaves of Gilgamesh SPILL all..YOU WON'T BELIEVE the size of his UNIT. PICS AND TESTIMONIALS ON PAGE 5

10 Things You Don't Know About Chickpeas - And 1 That Could KILL You!

This bloodletter BEGS every Mesopotamian to throw out this vegetable now!

If you scratch your inner ear with sticks, don’t blame us when this happens! Neti pots can also be to blame!

You won’t believe how Gilgamesh looks NOW!!!!

Lose the weight and keep it off with the Sumerian Farmwife Diet!

Lot's Wife! Before and After photos....you won't believe the shocking transformation!!

Ten Heavenly Anunnaki Recipes Your Family Will Love!

Experts: Your Child May Be ADDICTED to His Tablet!

SHOCKING pics of Inanna kicking Dumuzid out AGAIN!

Have you or any of your loved ones been smited by Hamurabi? You might be eligible for damages!

What these townspeople of Shuruppak look like now is TRAGIC!

These rulers of the Uruk Period died, and no one even noticed

Assur-Taklaku bright home a tiny kitten he found flailing in the irrigation canal. You won’t BELIEVE what it grew up to be!

Time to think about your investments! Sure, digging a hole and burying’s fine, but click here to see our new community ziggurat!

Inside Cher's sumptuous Shuruppak ziggurat! You won't believe the sacrificial altar!

You WON'T Believe What the High Priestess of the Fertility Goddess Inanna Does With Chick-Peas! (Not To Be Viewed By Children!)

Will the Hanging Gardens of Babylon be just another failure like the Tower of Babel, or will it be a world wonder for ages to come? Click to find out!

(Guug-el Translate available)

Learn the TRUTH about Hill A’ Rhe’s 20,000 missing tablets!!!

This common legume causes BLINDNESS — why you were kept in the dark!

She found the secret to ageless skin by using just 2 simple products and now healers everywhere HATE her.

Kubaba STUNS in a Cylindrical Headdress-- and Little Else!

Sumer's First Female Leader Flaunts Taut Beach Body on Banks of the Euphrates

Wow! This family saved 20,000 shekels in taxes on the sale of their home thanks to this ridiculous tax law NO ONE knows about, and now so can you!!

[quote] this ridiculous tax law NO ONE knows about

Is it not in the Code of Hamurrabi?

Enkidu...behind the scenes with Gilgamesh!

Interview with promising law school student Ruth Bader Ginsburg!

How Farmers Are Literally Erasing the Identities of Hunter/Gatherers, and Why That's Okay

Entire article:

Duh, civilization.

I Won't Be Shamed About My Extremely Large Eyeballs

Gilgamesh and Enkidu SECRET RENDEZVOUS! They call it “male bonding” white water rafting on the Tigris! We call it something else! Only Baal knows best!

How to get Ur shaft big-Ur in three small steps

This frumpy farmwife self-inflicted Tigris Pox to lose weight. You won’t BELIEVE what she looks like now!

Not your mother’s clay pot! Ten new ways to slow cook those difficult goat ribs!

This horse-hung Akkadian was HORRIFIED after mistakenly defecating in Ur-Nah’s beer pot. Imagine his CONFUSION when a delighted Ur-Nah tipped him!

Imagine his SHOCK when the tip turned out to be THIS!

End the heartbreak of Fertile Crescent infertility. The Midwives of Kish spill their secrets!

You’ll never guess what happens when we add yeast to grape juice!

A language isolate? Maybe not. Here are 5 languages that might be related to ours. Hint: One of them is NOT Elamite.

Shagshag, early queen of Lagash, first Sumerian drag queen or BOTH.

THE PICTURES WILL ASTOUND YOU.

Too many mouths to feed? Give your wife three drops of this special elixir after coitus to kill unwanted seeds.

Epic of Gilgamesh: See the Cast Then and Now

My Primitive, Brutal, Non-Anesthetized Surgical Story Isn't for Your Catharsis

Mess-o-Pots Mania!!

It’s our annual pre-inventory sale! Every decent offer considered! We’ve got clay pots for cooking, storage, burial, sanitary needs. You name it, we’ve got it. Main Road, behind the great ziggurat, Ur. Bring your slaves. You’ll need them!!

What does your cuneiform say about YOU?

Sargon of Akkad: “I’m transitioning!” Details inside.

Enkidu hospitalized after trying to 'conquer' the Bull of Heaven!

'Friend' Gilgamesh concerned "I told him to always prep first".

Get the 40-shekel kaunake worn by everyone this summer! The melam will make you feel ni! Woven and dyed organically by House of Ur-Gigir.

Want a new outfit for the Ishtar Fertile Rites?

(And who doesn’t? They don’t call it the “Fertile” Crescent for nothing!)

Too many children? Too many mouths to feed?

Sell a few to us, and you’ll get those badly needed shekels!

Why should you work your fingers to the bone, grinding those infernal chickpeas, when you could look like Baal’s Consort!

Sell those kids to us, the priests of Ur. Fresh sacrifices are always needed!

IT’S YOUR CIVIC DUTY!

The elderly women of Shruppak will be cold this winter. Their huts are in disrepair. Their husbands are dead and they have been left with nothing but the beaded shawls on their backs. And now they are without chickpeas to grind. They need your help. For two bushels of barley, you can own an old devoted Shruppakaa who will tend you home, your children and your crops. If you would like to become a sustaining member who will receive a different Shruppakaa upon the death of your current ward, please click on the subscriber button below. Two bushels of barley can help sustain the remaining old women of Shruppak. Please help, please click below. It is getting cold in Shruppak...