My Trick is Lost Inside My House Somewhere

He moved on, honey.

OP, have you checked up your ass? Maybe he fell in. That's some mighty big territory!

He's at my house, sorry :)

My trick actually figured out how to open a secured French window and escaped outside my suburban house. I was losing my mind, because he had never been outside on his own in his life. I got on the net and learned that the distance an escaped trick will go is correlated with how confident they are with people - the more outgoing and confident, the further they will venture. I made my husband come home from work, and we spent the whole day and most of the night crawling through my close neighbours' bushes and properties. At 3 am, we gave up, exhausted, and went to bed. An hour later, I heard crying under the very window from which he escaped. He was covered in cobwebs; clearly he'd been under the house. Having never missed a meal in his entire spoiled and pampered life, he was "starving.'

My point is that we had searched for hours around the property and under the house, and he never once made a sound or movement.

They are experts at hiding! Keep looking.

Lure him out with a towel and some turkey meatballs.

Funniest thread in months!

R6 ftw.

Maybe he's stuck in between walls?

OP. Fucking best thread opener in a decade. I'm waiting for the reference to that other thread about walking one's cat on a leash that started today.

^ or the one about owls preying on cats. Lol. Lol.

Can your trick yell? Does he have a big voicebox, OP?

R9 yeah, sugar walls

If he lives with you, he’s not a trick.

OP ,your trick is probably in heat. He's likely wandering the neighborhood with his rump up in the air, caterwauling until he receives satisfaction. You were incredibly irresponsible not to have him spayed. I promise you he will return once the heat cycle finishes.

Hobo tricks will sometimes revert back to previous feral behavior. If you give us the State your are located in , I can pull up a list of nightclubs and local bars.

Have you checked... The closet?!

Check your dryer. Your trick may be bored with you and just wants to curl up in a safe space.

He's likely hiding in the box springs of your mattress.

Distribute some some Special K onto the center of the living room carpet--that usually draws them out.

OMG OP, the original had me laughing out loud. Your thread has be dying with laughter. I need to take myself to bed before I have a hernia. You all are too much tonight.

Are we talking about hobosex?

Have you checked the hobocamp?

Oh Where oh where has my little trick gone

Oh where oh where can he be?

He playing Tricks on you.

Are you a Whiffenpoof? Don't break his heart when you find him.

Hey Jeffry Dahmer! You left his head in the freezer- which is why you can't hear him anymore. I believe the rest of him is in the 55 gallon drum in the spare room. Sorry the dementia is getting bad. leave yourself a note next time you misplace your choice in dead boi pussy.

Not at all funny OP. I'm sure this schtick was funny 15 years ago but now it is sad.

I am so sorry OP, I just want to hug you. Thoughts and prayers.

One time, I let my trick outside for the day, and it didn't return as usual that night. The next morning, there was still no sign of the trick. By afternoon, I was worried. I was at my kitchen sink window, and I heard a growling noise. I went outside and walked towards the woods across from my kitchen sink. There in the tall grass was my trick ...and another unknown trick. The unknown trick was staring down my trick, daring him to move. My trick sat there frozen in terror. The unknown trick saw me and ran away. My exhausted trick ran towards the door of the house and tore into his food. There's no telling how long he was trapped there by that other trick’s threatening gaze. Tricks can be so mean!

Let this be a reminder people. SPAY YOUR GODDAMN TRICKS!

How old is your trick, OP?

*thoughts & prayers that he'll never be found*

He's in the secret room under the staircase banging bad Ronald.

Bad news, OP. You now live with a roast.

R30 Indeed. Some tricks are naturally quite passive and timid and will simply freeze when confronted by a nastier and more aggressive trick.

Did you find him? I've been worried.

Have you tried putting some oxycontin in a dish and shaking it? The sound of the pills should draw him out.

This is how to do a parody thread.

I found out the housekeeper left a window ajar and think he may have gotten out. I left out a box of wine in case he gets hungry in the night, I'd hate to think he's all alone out there in the dark with nothing to eat.

r37. Unfortunately he accidentally got into my stash last week and I'm all out. My little guy is pretty smart and won't cum for just anything shaking in a dish so I can't fool him with aspirins.

When you check under the sink,look up OP. One of mine crawled on top of the pipe and didnt make a sound !

What about wet food, OP, like GHB?

OP - if this is a true story, I understand every emotion you have experienced and am really worried for you. Please keep a watchful eye out for your trick, because a circumsized trick is a defenseless trick.

To the posters here - I get how creating an attention-getting EST might be fun and satisfying for you, but please think twice before you post one about a truly traumatic and painful situation, especially to do with a trick. DLers can be amazingly empathetic and compassionate, but if they have been jerked around too many times by EST pranksters, cynicism kicks in and the compassion that is genuinely needed will be withheld.

One time I lost a trick in my apartment. It turned out he had tried to get out and he got stuck between the walls. I didn't find him until he started to smell a few months later. It was very traumatic. After that I didn't get another trick for seven years.

Senile, cat queen from Huntington, LI Frau -FF

Your trick is fine. He’ll be in the next T.I.M video.

Have you tried calling out to your trick by saying things like:

"I'll rent you a room upstairs for next-to-nothing even though you just knocked up the cashier at the gas station....!"

That's like catnip for tricks. They love that.

He's not up here, bitches!

Has he been fixed? Boy tricks of undetermined sexuality can do funny things in the night

r37 wins. that was fucking hilarious

Sorry if already posted, OP, but have you checked your fist? Your trick might be wedged on your arm.

He'll be fine OP. A couple of days and he'll slink back in with some cuts bruises and a gaping asshole. Give him a sitz bath to get the swelling and disease out of his anus. And be easy on him for the first few days.

Make sure to check his eyes when he gets back in case he got scratched. ...And also to see if he's still hallucinating or not.

Is your trick vaccinated against anal distemper, OP?

Do you allow him to smoke in your home, OP? If not he maybe sitting like a gargoyle on a ledge outside your bedroom.

Do NOT attempt to lure him with tuna.

It is NOT the universal summoner.

Check your roommate's breath, OP.

Maybe he ate him.

Maybe someone stole him, OP. I've had a few people steal my tricks over the years.

R57 is right. Check the neighbors. Is there a BILL TAYLOR that lives nearby? Also, Joel's been out of town so Mitzi and her owner could have coaxed the trick over there. Go check it out.

After 24 hours being stuck in a large moving bag, my little trick started howling like a banshee and wouldn't stop. Found him in no time. OP is a lying liar. Watch. He'll come back on and tell us the trick is dead or some other drivel.

Photos, OP, or it did not happen.

If you don't have a house, you wouldn't have this problem..

Are you sure it wasn't conscious uncoupling, OP?

Another golden thread.

Whore noises? What are whore noises?

Just put out a smidge of Astroglide and a few airline bottles of booze and Tricky will surface in no time.

They also respond to the opening of a wallet, and often come running!

He's fine! He sends his love!

Even dirty hobos like to play hard to get now and then!

OP, he's gone.

You should have microchipped your trick in case the Whore Control van was working your area and picked him up. Next time, get that chip. It's easy--just a lil' stab in the neck, and you can locate Trick Baby anywhere in the world.

If you let him watch you put your pin #s in- he’s gone! So are your cards!

Present hole. He'll sniff it out like an open can of cat food and come running.

Bump! More! More!

My trick often climbs inside and UP INTO my couch. In fact, sometimes I'll be watching television, and my trick will disappear for a bit and next thing I know, I can feel him moving behind my back, "inside" the couch cushion. It was a bit disconcerting at first, but it really is cute. I joke that he has his own little "apartment" back there.

Funny.

Ignore the trick, giving him attention will just teach him that hiding gets him what he wants.

"whore noises"....

Sometimes they'll climb up into the woodwork, usually behind an old loose doorjamb, and then can't find their way back out. You'll usually hear the wailing and, eventually, with dehydration, whimpering. You have to find him. If he dies up in there the smell will force you to move.

OP. You have to be careful around this time. When he smells another one in heat, he will spray ALL over your furniture. It's a real pain. You can track him down in the house by locating the fresh spray marks. They are a bitch to clean as well. When you find him, rub his nose in the spray areas and smack him with a rolled up newspaper. Hard. You have to teach him a lesson or he will keep doing it.

Don't say I didn't warn you bitches about this probability. You never listen.

This actually happened to a friend of mine. I went to his house one day and clothes and boxes were piled all over his bedroom. I asked him if he was moving and he said "No, my trick got lost in my closet last night."

After they had sex my friend passed out and the trick got up to piss. The walk in closet is in the bathroom, so when the trick tried to find the toilet he walked into the closet. The closet is small, just big enough to turn around in, and you have to pull a cord in order to turn the light on. Well the trick panicked when he realized he was in such a small space and couldn't find the light. When he panicked he started thrashing around in the hanging clothes and pulled down the clothes rack bar which wedged between the door and the wall completely blocking it. For some reason the door opened inward. Now it was pitch dark and he couldn't get out because the door was braced shut. The trick started freaking out and tore the closet to pieces. My friend is a deep sleeper and finally woke up when he heard sobbing coming from the bathroom. The trick had worn himself out and was soaked in sweat and naked, locked in his closet. He had to take the door off its hinges to get him out. His closet was destroyed and he was putting up new shelves when I went over. He said he doesn't know how long the trick had been in there but probably all night. He was almost too embarrassed to tell me what happened, but I am so glad he did because I laughed for an hour and it still makes me chuckle when I think about it.

OP, I'm sorry you're going through this. I had a similar but brief moment of panic earlier this week when some maintenance guys came into the apartment to clean the AC units, and then I couldn't find my terrified trick. I found him on the closet floor, where he had dug through some clutter and hid under a comforter. If something scared your trick, he would have likely gotten over it by now and come out of hiding. Maybe he is stuck somewhere. He stayed at my mother's house for a week last year, and I discovered a hole in the closet wall. If he had climbed through that hole, he would have ended up behind the bathtub.

They can survive for a few days without water or food. If he is stuck in the interior walls, what would be the best way to find him? I thought maybe a holding a stethoscope against the wall, but if he's being still (as tricks can be), that won't help. I would move every piece of furniture away from the walls and inspect every surface of the wall for holes that he might have squeezed through. Check the bottom drawer of your dresser; he could have gone under the dresser and climbed into the drawer from behind.

The fact that he isn't moaning, though, makes me think he could also be outside. I've heard the advice to put his dirty boxers outside, he'll recognize his own scent, and he might come back to use the boxers out of habit. Also put his favorite drugs outside, too.

Be careful OP. They've been doing trap, neuter and release in these parts.

R78 I'm glad you found your trick but I've heard that putting dirty boxers outside can sometimes attract other neighborhood tricks, not just the one he is looking for. I would leave them out briefly but not for a long period of time. You don't want a colony of feral tricks, some with diseases, on OPs porch.

OP. Be prepared for the whammy: he may come back with his tummy all distended and his teats majorly puffy and swollen. If he starts making a bed or nest, congrats! you have baby tricks on the way!

Have you thought of making missing posters, and putting them up around the neighborhood?