Most torturous sounds in the world

There was a time when advertisers were using "fake" crying on radio commercials - there was a whole spate of them - a house was crying, a woman was crying, etc. So bloody annoying! I am assuming the commercials were from the same agency even though the various commercials were for totally different products.

Roosters crowing.

Horrible, awful noise like someone screaming in your ears.

I fucking HATE roosters.

The sound of Julie Andrews opening her mouth to either sing or speak. Just retire already, you stealth homophobe, you foul fetid enabler of gay erasure.

Queens talking loudly about OMG HOW AWESOME WAS REAL HOUSEWIVES LAST NIGHT!!??

Vacuum cleaner

Loud door latches

vocal fry

Everything OP mentioned except dogs.

Shoes you can hear.

Other people’s bass.

Velcro.

*Squeaking * Styrofoam.

My heavy, clumsy-assed upstairs neighbor walking around in hard soled shoes on her hard wood floors at 2 AM, slamming drawers shut, dropped things so loud that the ceiling fan trembles, and generally making life unpleasant.

A loud, obnoxious car or motorcycle speeding by you

Liberals whining. And Fraus talking.

Rap

r5 are you a cat?

All soprano female voices of women under 50. They sound like somebody stepped on the puppy's tale and caused dogs to bark hundreds of miles away.

Vocal fry

Whispering

Vinyl records hiss-pop-crackle

Loud motorcycle exhausts sputtering while at standstill

[quote] Vocal fry

I wish that someone would provide a good example of this.

I have yet to pinpoint what vocal fry really is.

vo·cal fry noun a way of speaking in which the voice is very low-pitched and has a characteristic rough or creaking sound. "she tweaks the way teen girls actually talk, with high-rising terminals, vocal fry, and ‘like’ for emphasis"

For me, listening to it (often quite by accident, because I don't hang out with people, mostly women, who have it) is like listening to someone who constantly has to clear their throat to get rid of a tickle in there. Young actresses who have it really need to practice public speaking (preferably by themselves, looking in a mirror) because they will end up being typecast in roles (if they are lucky enough to be cast) that require that, and after a while, listening to them being the same over and over becomes truly tiresome.

Squealing brakes on cars. Come on people get your brakes serviced once in a while.

Living in a busy city with lots of idiots with cell phones: all the different rings and buzzes. Obnoxious!

For r19

Babies crying: It's meant to grab your attention and elicit a response. "Scientists have found that our brains are hard-wired to respond strongly to the sound, making us more attentive and priming our bodies to help whenever we hear it – even if we're not the baby's parents."

Alarm clocks and Emergency Broadcast system: Wouldn't both be pointless if the sounds were easily ignored?

Whistling.

Leaf blowers.

Whistling.

Bagpipes (after the first two minutes).

Upper register of the violin.

Most countertenors.

"Rose, you hum!" (Can't find the hole quote.)

The theme from [italic]F(r)iends[/italic] sounds like Satan’s first guitar lesson.

People who smack their gum.

Smoke detectors, especially when they react to other things than smoke.

Shawn Mendes singing

Loud chewing

Slurping while drinking

Certain English accents

Car alarms left to go on, and on

Lip smacking unless you've had a stroke and are physically unable to stop from doing so

Yip-yip dogs that won't STFU especially at places they really shouldn't be (cafes, grocery stores, etc.)

Music in eateries turned up so loudly that you cannot hold a conversation with your companion or even hear the waitstaff

ESPN commentators who YELL everything they say, like a grandpa who refuses to wear hear-aids

The "beep beep" of trucks backing up.

R23 , that's not vocal fry. This is.

Same thing, r35.

"Haaarrryyyy! They want to take the babies!!!"

Nope.

crap

haven't had coffee yet

Okay, r38. Since this is the hill you've chosen to die on, DO tell us what the sounnnnnnnd r23 makes when she talks is called.

Smoke alarms.

Upspeak, R 40.

Screaming of crows.

No, that's fry. She did not put question marks at the end of what she said. She extended each of her last syllables.

Donald Trump speaking.

Lisa Kudrow’s voice that combines vocal fry and upspeak. Drives me up the wall, especially when “singing” that horrifically unfunny song of hers. She and that Mullally woman from that stealth homophobe NBC minstrel show make Fran Drescher sound like Beverly Sills.

Saws

Other's people idea of good music late in the night or early in the morning

Nails scratching a blackboard

White women talking.

Children singing. When James Lipton on Inside the Actiors Studio used to ask the actors what their favorite sound was, they all would invariably answer children singing. As if. The sweetest sound to any of them, particularly that fake Sharon Stone, is “And the nominees are...”

Monique farting

R46 I never watched "Friends", but as a big fan of "Romy & Michelle" (It's so stupid it's hysterical), I actually empathized with her & Mira Sorvino. I never noticed vocal fry in that, but I need to watch again. I actually identified with the Janene Garafalo character (sorry, not going to google to confirm spelling, just too lazy on this Monday morning) for her cynical attitude and loved the music, so perhaps the film manipulated me into overlooking Lisa's annoying qualities. I doubt I'd have liked them as high school girls (I never liked many of the ones I went to school with), and I certainly get annoyed when I hear any sort of vocal fry & teen girl giggling (I got stuck with it on a long subway ride home from work on Friday), so I second/third/fourth vocal fry with exclamation points!

R44, now who's taking this to the grave. If you can;'t hear the difference between your example and the one at 38, then there's nothing left to say, Fry is a gutteral sound, not the extension of syllables, especially when the speaker upspeaks.

Agree to disagree, r52. Mind you, I'm not saying your fry isn't fry. Just that it's possibly more comprehensive than your little hipster video description has the ability to comprehend. Or hear.

The sound of water running from a faucet. It gives me an underlying sense of urgency (not to pee) and I have to stop what I'm doing until it's dealt with.

Dripping faucets, as r55 reminds me.

Mandarin.

R57 must live in a college town.

Vegans talking.

Indian women speaking in English

Trump’s voice.

Women with very high pitched and baby doll voices.

Babies crying, especially in restaurants.

Lina Lamont

That fucking Aamco radio commercial. The beep beep always startles me when I’m behind the wheel. “Curb Your Enthusiasm” covered this once.

The sound of the cell phone ringing. These days an actual phone call is always some problem.

You’re telling me, R62.

More

A car alarm is one of the worst.

Either of my Boomer parents hacking up phlegm, clearing their throats, spluttering and coughing. They do it fucking incessantly. Only one of them is a smoker but it doesn’t seem to matter.

Is the other a heavy drinker, R67?

Neighbors' lawnmowers.

The worst is the psychotic DL cunts going on and on about the election. Fucking die, cunts.

Well, what else are you going to do about the election, r70?

The obnoxious sound of calls conducted on speaker in public. And the cunts who shout into their phones.

They all need to shut the fuck up.

Dogs barking, especially if it is not stopped by their owners after the first 30 seconds.

I like the sound of dogs barking.

1. Kissing, moist mouth noise, lipsmacking/teeth sucking, and the start of a lighter in any media that includes audio. These sounds are everywhere regardless of what I watch or listen to and It's intentionally amped up in media. It's migraine inducing and tantamount to someone snapping their finger in my ear to get my attention.

2. Brit Marling and Ivanka Dump's way of speaking. It's grating, manipulative, and clearly put-on to give the impression of wisdom and depth.

I made the mistake of not noticing that there is a major hospital and trauma center a couple blocks from my apartment. Now I get to enjoy the sound of ambulances screaming up and down the street at all hours of the day and night. Some days average 3 to 4 per hour.

Just out of interest R32, which British accents don't you like? I used to think I didn't like the scouse accent but recently I've started to find Stephen Graham sexy so that helped enormously.

Sorry meant English accents there ^^.

Laugh tracks on the tv.

Loud motorcycles, especially in spring when you’ve just opened the windows.

Birds in the morning.

Power saw

"Babies crying.

Alarm clocks.

Dogs barking.

Emergency Broadcast System."

On an airplane!

Vocal fry. And that whiney, privileged, know -it-all, 'snot mom' voice.

Doorbells on the TV or the radio when you're not really paying attention and end up mistaking them for your own doorbell. Now that I have a Ring doorbell I don't have this issue anymore as if it's my doorbell, I get a notification on my phone or my watch.

Bikers Suck.

Kristoffer Winters' voice

Women's fake orgasm sounds in porn. I can't watch straight porn even if the guy is hot.

smoker's cough

Fucking kids running around screaming.

These things.

Gunshots.

Dog barking

Whistling tea kettles.

Trump speaking.

Women squealing and faking orgasms in straight porn.

People beeping out farts in yoga class. Or forced, over-the-top DARTH VADER breathing in yoga class.

People who can't for the life of them turn a door handle, they always have to pull-slam shit closed.

Flip flops, sandals, or any backless summer shoe thwack thwack thwacking against the sweaty soles of someone's feet.

People sucking their teeth audibly after a meal. Drives me apeshit. It's very crass.

Car alarms

Fraus talking about their kids on the train

Drunks singing at 3:00 am

Motorcycles, especially before dawn.

Crying babies at the movies.

Gum chewing

Farting

Nails on a blackboard

People partying in the apartment next to yours when you're trying to sleep

Rap/hip hop music

People arguing

Jackhammers

Sarah Silverman's voice

Roseanne Barr's voice

Courtney Love's voice

Gwyneth Paltrow’s voice

Mechanical keyboards and people who pound the shit out of their keyboards when they type.

Screaming young women at bachelorette parties held in gay bars,

Initiate vocal fry and slowly say

“Venti Iced Skinny Hazelnut Macchiato, Sugar-Free Syrup, Extra Shot, Light Ice, No Whip”

End with upspeak.

Dump speaking, trying to string words together coherently. Painful.

Madonna screeching

One-sided mobile phone conversation on public transportation.

R102 re: "Motorcycles (before dawn)" - Haven't you ever noticed the differently pitched, even or often more flatulent 'sput sput sput ' of many makes of motorcycle exhausts that's different to truck/car exhausts?

I live near a biker gathering spot and some nights/ weekend afternoons are nearly unbearable for this reason.

Ben Shapiro’s voice. How is it possible for any grown man to sound like that ?

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSS

American women who talk like little girls.

r114 Have some respect. I just died.

Static-y hold music and phone calls with poor reception...in this day and age, why is call quality so often terrible?

Tinny-sounding pop or rap music being played on a mobile phone speaker on public transportation

Lol R115

Fire drill alarms.

Adult women who adopt Blanche DuBois flirty baby voices around men.

People clipping their nails on the bus or subway. They should all be shot.

[quote]The theme from F(r)iends sounds like Satan’s first guitar lesson.

So no one told you life was gonna be this way

👏 👏 👏 👏

[quote] I have yet to pinpoint what vocal fry really is.

IMO, the most obvious vocal fry comes from Kourtney Kardashian. Here's a compilation.

Upspeak / uptalk is a separate issue, but can occur with vocal fry.

People who suck their teeth when they speak.

[quote]One-sided mobile phone conversation on public transportation.

Having to hear the other half over the speaker is much, much worse.

[quote]Dump speaking

This is a new one.

Fake female pornstar moaning. It sounds alarming -- like they're undergoing torture. Do straight guys really find that to be a turn-on?

I never understood why women struggle to control their moaning during sex. I lived in a fraternity for 2 years and the womanly sounds of lovemaking haunt me to this day.

Weed whackers.

They fucking SUCK!

What about the sound of a spoon scaping to get the last bit out of a small food container like a yoghurt.

...scraping .

Cellphone conversations in public places, especially in a restaurant.

Yes, R127/128. It gets on my last nerve.

Trump talking or whining, I’ve actually avoided audio of him for quite some time now and it’s been good. Also, cubefraus at work whispering when they gossip, I want to tell them to fuck off outside.

Emergency alert sirens. Where I live the sirens are tested every Wednesday at 12 noon on the dot. The sirens are up high on poles and they spin around multiple times as they sound. If you live within a half mile of one when it rotates in your direction it is teeth shatteringly loud. You deal with it on Wednesdays, but when they go off at other times (as they did last weekend when tornado warnings were issued near me) the sound is scary as hell.

The worst sound on the planet is a leaf blower. The sound can ruin a peaceful day.

My mom mutes the tv whenever Trump is speaking.

r107, they're called "Woo Girls"

Police helicopters ("ghetto birds") at 2 in the morning.

I do not watch channels that show Trump at times when they might show Trump. I get all the news I need, and then some, on DL.

The combination of non-stop, hateful ranting and wispery giggling from someone with mental illness who refuses to take medication

Parents who cuss at their children, instead of getting off of their fat lazy asses and taking the time to help or explain things to them

A squeaky wheel on a shopping cart

wispery giggling like Muttley?

The Geico lizard, or gecko.

Chalk on a chalkboard (past) Marker on a whiteboard (current)

Housekeepers talking outside your hotel room when you want to sleep in

Women flicking their finger nails

Is this vocal fry? He really extennnnnnnnnds those last syllabllllllles.

If not, what is it called?

Mommies in stores having loud, cutesy 'conversations' with their pre-verbal crotch fruit, rattling on about every fucking thing they are doing or looking at. "JADEN, should MOMMY buy the big box of oatmeal or the littler one? What do you think? Hmmmmmmmmm?'

Glad I don't shop where r142 shops.

R124 & R125 I just wonder how many guys pulled a "Porky's" and shoved their jockstrap in the woman's mouth to shut her up!

Someone yelling Allahu akbar

Men wearing their shirts untucked. Women forgoing girdles and other foundation garments.

r146 [italic]Sounds[/italic] , Rose. [italic]Sounds[/italic] .

Women gagging on dick during blowjobs. I'm surprised straight men find sex with women attractive with all the obnoxious sound effects.

Four middle-aged Polish women chatting all night one row behind you on an overnight flight to Paris.

Black women on the phone

So, clearly women are annoying...

Guys who start singing loudly when walking through the subway so there is full echo.

"El-habibi laAAAaaaAAAaaaAAAA ba'a something ba'a!"

The old queen in Palm Springs White Party weekend who was playing "Camelot" at high volume while he was sunbathing nude while others were playing Pet Shop Boys, Whitney, Madonna, Cher and other current pop hits.

Additon to R153 I meant to add 20 years ago. He's probably playing the harp now.

Miz Lindz having an orgasm.

Nailed it. I’d add fingernails against a chalkboard

The woman in my office who clears her throat five times a minute. All day long.

Balloons rubbing together and squeaking. I have to get away from them IMMEDIATELY.

Loud saws at construction sites or in my neighborhood. My assumption is that straight men LIKE that sound or get off on it....perhaps I am wrong.

R153 that is so funny! I can only imagine...

Six geese a laying.

If you think one goose honking on and on iis bad, imagine half a dozen of them having an orgy in your front yard.

They do DP and everything!

Things have really gone to hell since Perdue became Secretary of Agriculture.

The stammering vacillations that always punctuate Earl Douglas's denials and lies provoke my ire.

Every Earl response: "Naaaah! I, I, I wha--? *nervous laughter* I do not--no! Uhhhhh, *gibberish*, siiiiiiiiigh."

R157 mte, throat-noises and coughs make me near-homicidal. I can't even be civil to anyone who does it habitually.

[quote] I lived in a fraternity for 2 years and the womanly sounds of lovemaking haunt me to this day.

Your frat brothers made womanly sounds when fucking each other?

Here I thought vocal fry would own this thread?

Pieces of smooth styrofoam rubbing against each other.