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Keram Malicki-Sanchez knows...

Keram knows quite a bit about Tammy Cruise’s recent dalliances. It should come as no surprise that Cruise hired Henry Cavill for the most recent “Mission: Impossible” flick primarily because he likes cock and Cruise wanted it. Unfortunately for him, Cavill doesn’t care for eldergays - particularly closeted CO$ ones - and rebuffed his advances. Well after filming wrapped, Cavill ended up paying dearly for denying Cruise dick: why else do you think Warners dropped him as Superman? In a similar vein, Cavill has as of late been spending his free time in London plowing Tom Daley’s ass - with his husband’s permission, though DLB is none too pleased about being excluded from the fun, owing to Henry’s feelings about eldergays.

Keram also knows Cruise hired Miles Teller for the upcoming “Top Gun” sequel - which, by the way, looks to be the hottest movie mess in quite some time, hence the reason its release date has been pushed back repeatedly - for purposes of tapping that ass, despite knowing Teller is straight. Teller’s also desperate, however, having nearly destroyed his career with a certain GQ interview that (accurately) depicted him as Young Hollywood’s Biggest Douche (YHBD), resulting in him crawling back to TV work. Tammy whispered sweet nothings (and future Big Movie casting promises) from their very first meeting on, and at one point squired him away to that Telluride ranch no one wants to buy for nearly a week of fucking. Being YHBD, Miles actually ended up *bragging* that Hollywood’s biggest star was so desperate to fuck him, but claimed he ended up "dominating" Cruise most of the time - which didn't happen. Keram is unsure whether this was merely a defense mechanism on Teller's part...

Keram knows Cruise has seen his daughter all of two times - both for photo-op purposes - since Katie whisked her away from life in the Scieno cult while he was away location-filming in Iceland. Keram also knows Suri entered her teen-rebellion stage slightly early, and has been telling classmates she's an “abandoned child.” Miss Cruise is not amused.

Keram knows Jake G. tends to get frisky when he’s filming abroad, and sure enough, he made his move on Tom Holland his first week on set of the next “Spider-Man” flick. Being possibly the nicest young (well-known) actor working today, Tom put up with it for a bit and consented to a few make-out sessions, but refused to go any further. In an coincidence-cum-irony that impressed even Keram’s jaded mind, Jake happened to run into the *last* Spider-Man, Andrew Garfield, one night at the Groucho Club (midway through filming). Andrew was considerably more receptive to Jake’s advances. (And his cock.) And yet he still identifies as "heteroflexible." This confuses Keram.

by Anonymousreply 76Last Sunday at 6:42 PM

Keram knows the hottest little black book making the rounds in Hollywood these days doesn’t belong to the Heidi Fleiss du jour, but rather Rick Singer. (One of his “clients” apparently stole it from his home office the day the indictments were issued, and said client’s best frenemy stole it from her - and made copies of it before “finding” it lodged under her G-Wagen’s front seat.) It contains the names of celebs significantly more famous than Aunt Becky and Lynette Scavo who pay him big bucks to get their spoiled little shits into college. While Keram doesn’t believe in outing people who aren’t public figures - and no, merely being celebrity spawn isn’t enough by itself - he can confirm that Arnold Schwarzenegger employed Singer’s services to get his son Patrick (who qualifies as a public figure, having dated Miley Cyrus and appeared in multiple films) into USC.

Keram knows Justin Bieber is in far more dire straits than is publicly known, and was about two weeks away from going Full Shaved-Head-Jacket Britney before his handlers sent him to Young Hollywood’s favorite halfway house (for going sober), Cirque Lodge in Utah. (It’s where Demi Lovato spent several months last year as well.)

Speaking of mental illness, Keram knows viewers of “Keeping Up With The Kardashians” will definitely *not* be keeping up with Kanye’s bipolar issues. The producers ended up excising him almost entirely from the upcoming season, lest his cray-cray become an unwelcome distraction. They instead threw Khloe’s babydaddy, Tristan Thompson, under the bus by setting up her “accidental” discovery that Tristan was banging her BFF, Jordyn Woods. Jordyn was paid quite handsomely for her services - by “momager” Kris Jenner, all while keeping Khloe in the dark. Well, unless she reads DataLounge…

Keram knows TMZ is sitting on a sex tape of DL’s favorite cockgobbler, Aaron Schock, getting pounded by a WeHo fuckbuddy, but hasn’t aired it yet because Aaron is yesterday’s news - at least for the moment.

Keram knows Luke Perry did, in fact, die from a stroke, but not one due to natural causes. The part omitted from the official ME’s report - for protecting his kids - detailed a brain badly deteriorated from years of cocaine abuse, as well as the John Belushi-level amounts of it in his bloodstream.

Keram knows why Kate Beckinsale is fucking Pete Davidson, a man young enough to be her son (and a not-very attractive one at that): the combination of his 11-inch cock and “prodigy-level” cunnilingus skills. This is the same reason Ariana Grande put up with dating someone considerably beneath her fame level for so long - even with his manic-depressive spells and multiple suicide attempts.

Keram knows the rumors of Angelina Jolie playing a role in an upcoming MCU flick are bogus, considering her anorexia/bulimia and horse addiction have whittled her down to well under 100 pounds.

by Anonymousreply 104/05/2019

More!

by Anonymousreply 204/05/2019

Fuck no. Not this fanfic shit again. BLOCKED. Go back to the hole you were driven into last time.

by Anonymousreply 304/05/2019

FF/ ignored

by Anonymousreply 404/05/2019

And DL knows that Kerala lies and makes up every damn thing he posts,

by Anonymousreply 504/05/2019

Keram Malicki-Sanchez is the right way to say Merry Christmas to you

by Anonymousreply 604/05/2019

Even if fake, it’s a joy to read. Continue on please KM-S.

by Anonymousreply 704/05/2019

None of this is remotely credible to me except maybe the Aaron Schock thing. But as R7 says, it's fun to read.

by Anonymousreply 804/05/2019

None of this makes sense. Why Would Cruise be interested in Miles Teller, who isn’t even attractive? And he’s 32 on t of that.

Fake news!

by Anonymousreply 904/05/2019

Keram Malicki-Sanchez is the DL way to say "Jealous, bitches?" to you.

by Anonymousreply 1004/05/2019

Meh. Give us some real scoop.

by Anonymousreply 1104/05/2019

Fuck the haters, K M-S. Please carry on.

You are a link to the vanished wonders of DL past.

by Anonymousreply 1204/05/2019

Holy shit, a KMS post! We haven't had one of these in years now.

They are always fun. And as always, fuck the haters that would rather have boring instagram ho' thread #42 than a fun gossip thread

by Anonymousreply 1304/05/2019

I am tempted to believe the Luke Perry story. He was the oldest looking fifty-two year old (with health insurance) I've ever seen. Something was up.

by Anonymousreply 1404/05/2019

Lukes Perry's health problems were definitely drug induced.

by Anonymousreply 1504/05/2019

The idea of Tom Cruise trying so hard to get his hand on Cavill's glorious mantits and Cavill leaving him with blue balls makes me so happy that I want to believe it.

by Anonymousreply 1604/05/2019

K M-S! Always a treat to read these posts.

by Anonymousreply 1704/05/2019

More fan fiction.

by Anonymousreply 1804/05/2019

[Quote] Why Would Cruise be interested in Miles Teller, who isn’t even attractive? And he’s 32 on t of that.

There is no accounting for taste. There are some bitches here who have tried to start threads talking up Miles fucking Teller.

by Anonymousreply 1904/05/2019

Well OF COURSE it’s made-up, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t well-crafted.

by Anonymousreply 2004/05/2019

I hope Schwarzenegger gets ensnared in the USC business.

by Anonymousreply 2104/05/2019

I stand with Keram

by Anonymousreply 2204/05/2019

KMS lost his shit when someone told him cold water does not "put out" heartburn. Trolldar outed him.

Turned out KMS was trolling the entire board, either screaming at people for nothing or talking about how great his KMS posts were. I assume he was trying to ruin other threads to drive people to his own, but who knows.

by Anonymousreply 2304/05/2019

Great gossip.

But why would Schwarzenegger care about getting Patrick into a decent college? Maria Shriver would.

by Anonymousreply 2404/05/2019

KMS will always have my love. respect and admiration for doing an episode of Friday the 13th: The Series!

by Anonymousreply 2504/05/2019

I don’t believe Holland would agree to make out with JG and then turn him down for sex. Or that Cavill would turn down Cruise of all people. His MySpace ex wasn’t much to look at.

But don’t get me wrong, I like the idea of this kind of gossip returning to DL after vapid millennials and dumb fraus turned them off. So bring back Keram, Celebrity Caterer, Makeup Artiste, Cocaine Gossip Girl and the Crew Guy.

by Anonymousreply 2604/05/2019

There's no way Cavill is 'plowing' Tom Daley's ass. Daley's about 4 feet tall...

by Anonymousreply 2704/05/2019

Gossip is only good when it’s true, or has a kernel of truth. The only one of these that might qualify is the Luke Perry dirt.

by Anonymousreply 2804/05/2019

Does Keram Malicki-Sanchez know he's a Datalounge star? He doesn't list us on his resume.

by Anonymousreply 2904/06/2019

What no View gossip?

by Anonymousreply 3004/06/2019

OMG, he's back! We missed you, Keram!

This is some scorching tea. So hot it scalded my tongue. I know nothing excited Tom Cruise more than the idea of "mentoring" a bunch of hot young men on the set of a Top Gun sequel. Whether Miles hooked up with him or not, you can bet Tom tapped a lot of the lower level stars/extras on set. Lucky bitch.

Keram -- do you have any recent gay gossip about any of the following:

Leo Dicaprio

Alex Pettyfer

Sebastian Stan

Orlando Bloom

James Franco

John Mayer

Logan Paul

Scott Eastwood

Cameron Dallas

Darren Criss

Would love to hear anything you got!

by Anonymousreply 3104/06/2019

Bravo, Keram! Encore, encore!!

by Anonymousreply 3204/06/2019

I want Faye Dunaway rehearsing to play Kate Hepburn crazy gossip!

by Anonymousreply 3304/06/2019

Any sane insider wouldn't bother sharing stuff with us outsiders since there is no real benefit for him and it could cost him his career or access to the industry. An insecure cuckoo crazy person? Sure they may share insider stuff, because they are in an angry or frustrated state of mind (or just high as fuck).

by Anonymousreply 3404/06/2019

So who originated this Making Shit Up event? And when? And why saddle this real boy with it?

by Anonymousreply 3504/06/2019

This is vintage, old school Datalounge and I love it. Bullshit like this is what got me here in the first place.

by Anonymousreply 3604/06/2019

Cheers me up no end to see you back Karim!

by Anonymousreply 3704/06/2019

Keram, dumbass.

by Anonymousreply 3804/06/2019

Sorry, Keram

by Anonymousreply 3904/06/2019

I always confuse Miles Teller with that Jewish actor whose father may (or may not) be Steven Spielberg.

by Anonymousreply 4004/06/2019

You mean Shia LaBeouf (sp?), I think, r40.

Yeah, this is a fun post. 100% made-up, but fun. We could stand more threads like this again.

Except the Cruise/ Cavill / Daley story is plain dumb -- while Cavill might put out for a good role, there's no way he's "plowing" Tom Daley for free, because he is actually straight. And sleazy that way, too.

by Anonymousreply 4104/06/2019

Cavill is a dumb himbo willing to do whatever it takes to make it in Hollywood. He and Gyllenhaal had an affair and Jake got too clingy, and got in the way of Henry's career, so Henry dumped Jake.

by Anonymousreply 4204/06/2019

Is this thread going to turn into a debate about whether Cavill is straight or not?

by Anonymousreply 4304/06/2019

Pete Davidson's 11 inch cock! Yummers!

by Anonymousreply 4404/06/2019

Would you rather yet another endlessly mind-numbing thread about Follies or boring non-starter Pete Buttigag or some unknown hairy Arab who apparently just one freak here wishes to be pounded by? Sheesh you people, are hard to please.

by Anonymousreply 4504/06/2019

[quote]Would you rather yet another endlessly mind-numbing thread about Follies

Somehow, those manage to elude me.

[quote]Pete Buttigag

No, no, a thousand times no (though better endless Pete than endless Trump).

[quote]or some unknown hairy Arab who apparently just one freak here wishes to be pounded by?

Less than DL Hot. WTF did that bitch come from?

by Anonymousreply 4604/06/2019

If Cavill couldn't bring himself to close his eyes and let Tom Cruise have a go, he really is dumb.

Lovely to see you again, Keram M-S! Kisses!

by Anonymousreply 4704/06/2019

r23 there is/was more than one KMS. Two of them were legit, or at least had insider items that were borne out over time and confirmed by other posters in the days was DL had real insiders.

This one--not so much. The JB and LP ones make the most sense, but could be deduced from media accounts.

by Anonymousreply 4804/06/2019

Great to see you, Keram M-S!

by Anonymousreply 4904/06/2019

I don't care if it's fake or not. At least it's gossip, you know, what DL used to be about before all the endless Trump threads.

by Anonymousreply 5004/06/2019

Bill Hader likes to get dressed in drag and troll for tricks on Santa Monica Blvd. That’s why he got divorced.

by Anonymousreply 5104/06/2019

My favorite Keram thread

by Anonymousreply 5204/06/2019

The gossip may or may not be true but I’ll take this any day over another fucking Meghan Markle thread.

by Anonymousreply 5304/06/2019

There's no debate on Cavills or Tom Hardys sexuality as they both lived an open gay life on social media before their fame. One on Myspace the other on Instagram. Then suddenly it was all scrubbed though nothing dies on the internet so you can easily find all of it.

by Anonymousreply 5404/06/2019

Goddamn I needed this! Keep the dirt flowing.

by Anonymousreply 5504/07/2019

[quote]There's no way Cavill is 'plowing' Tom Daley's ass. Daley's about 4 feet tall...

I'm not sure I understand this comment. Just because Daley's short means he can't have rough sex?

by Anonymousreply 5604/07/2019

What about some great gossip on it twink of the moment Timotae Chalamet? Thanks in advance

by Anonymousreply 5704/07/2019

Of all the items, please let the Aaron Schock video be true.

by Anonymousreply 5804/07/2019

I've seen all the Cavill gay pics but haven't found any for Tom Hardy. Could some kind dear post some links?

by Anonymousreply 5904/07/2019

No one has an 11 inch cock. Beckinsale wants publicity- she's getting it, so mission accomplished

by Anonymousreply 6004/08/2019

[quote]Except the Cruise/ Cavill / Daley story is plain dumb -- while Cavill might put out for a good role, there's no way he's "plowing" Tom Daley for free, because he is actually straight.

As has been much discussed on DL over the years -- and LONG before he got the Superman gig -- Cavill's now-former Hollywood friends were almost all (openly) gay men. There were numerous photos of the group hanging out in gay hotspots throughout WeHo. Most have since been scrubbed from the interwebs by WB's flacks, of course.

Also, considering Tom Daley ADMITTED to a fling with a 6'6" hottie, I don't think Cavill (who's several inches shorter) is much of a stretch.

by Anonymousreply 6104/09/2019

Let's forget about the 6 feet and talk about the 6 inches.

by Anonymousreply 6204/09/2019

Daley isn't that short - he's one of the taller divers (5'8 or 9). Jack Laugher's much more typical at 5'5.

by Anonymousreply 6304/09/2019

Well, that was a rather brief appearance.

by Anonymousreply 6404/12/2019

More!

by Anonymousreply 6504/12/2019

All of these stories are plausible. And there have been rumors for months about Cavill rejecting Tom and being extremely uncomfortable around him on the set of Mission Impossible.

by Anonymousreply 6604/12/2019

it was 7 inches.

by Anonymousreply 6704/12/2019

The Schwarzenegger one sounds entirely believable

by Anonymousreply 6804/12/2019

Keram, can you go and get stuff about people who are more interesting than this sorry group?

by Anonymousreply 6904/12/2019

Keram, any gossip on Edgar Ramirez, like who he's fucking. Also, Ricky Martin and his husband?

by Anonymousreply 7004/13/2019

Praise Jesus! I believe!!

by Anonymousreply 7104/13/2019

I can’t tell if R51 is joking or not.

by Anonymousreply 7204/14/2019

Any gossip about Evan Peters or Emma Roberts? I get the feeling there are some interesting things happening behind closed doors for both of them. Drugs? Mental illness? Cheating? Volatility?

by Anonymousreply 7304/14/2019

Bump

by Anonymousreply 7404/16/2019

You there, KMS?

by Anonymousreply 75Last Sunday at 2:30 PM

Keram has temporarily lost the will to live and will be back shortly.

by Anonymousreply 76Last Sunday at 6:42 PM
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