Would a narcissist suspect he/she is a narcissist?

Take this.

You could recognize some narcissistic traits in yourself, and get therapy for them. A full-blown narcissist doesn't see it, though. They think they're juuuuust fine the way they are, and it's others who are the problem.

Recently some article was published saying that most narcissists know they are, and are basically okay with it. See the attached article.

R1, there's some problem with the test. After you submit your answers, the next page with the results doesn't load.

What R2 said. I dated one. For a while.

There is some self-knowledge, though. He policed the worst of it at the onset of the relationship. So he knew. As he grew more confident with the relationship, that self-checking became much less diligent.

And that is when I made other plans for my life.

R3 I just retook it and it gave me my results no problem. I scored a 7 out of 40, OK'd them to use my results in their research and declined to answer more questions on the second page. Are you using your phone? There's a much more comprehensive test that asks a couple hundred questions out there also.

4/40, and I had no trouble with the results. Their extra "research questions" seem to be for marketing and advertisements, so I advise skipping those.

R1, thank you for posting this test.

7/40, it is relatively low.

I guess R2 is right. I can definitely recognize some narcissistic traits in me.

i got 24/40 on that test! I always suspected i was a narcissist

R8 At least you're honest.

yes, i'm trying to be more considerate towards others.

I think I was harsher on myself with the test than what is reality, so maybe you did as well. I have moments of grandiosity offset by utter contempt and shame. I think most people do. 24 is pretty high though. I bet you got all the body pride/exhibitionist ones.

no, i'm actually not proud of my body: i'm lazy and i'm not exactly in shape. mine is more of "i'm smarter and better than all of you" narcissism. sometimes i think i'm a genius. there, i've said it!

We all exhibit narcissistic traits. The fact that it concerns you that you might be a narcissist indicates that you are not. True narcissists, the toxic kind, feel little to no remorse, as they lack the capacity for empathy.

Avoid pools of water. Or don't avoid them, because they are bound to look fabulous.

i hope you're right, r13. thanks.

OP why are you asking this question? I'm assuming you've done some things you aren't proud of, but don't feel really any remorse, and are wondering why you don't. Also you forgot to turn off the coffee pot.

I dated one for a bit and he was very open about it. Even said "I'm probably a narcissist and I know it." They can be self-aware, but they're still destructive, awful people. I still feel bad for them, though, because it's not their fault and there's really no treatment for it. They just have to live their lives and suffer the consequences. They'll probably die alone.

R16

I think it's because I don't feel an empathy, especially when it comes to my parents and other relatives. I feel like I'm only going through the motions if/when I apologize.

There’s a 12,000 step program out there that some people say has been helpful...

r17 when people warn you like that, run away - it's an excuse for their own behavior and they don't plan on changing it. If you feel bad for him, he will use that to his advantage and your disadvantage.

R16

And sometimes I don't feel I have to apologize for some of my actions.

I scored a zero out of forty.

That's got to be abnormal in a different way from those who score 40.

Too much lack of self esteem?

R22 You're a liar or not self aware enough to answer the questions honestly. Sorry.

R22 and R23: I also got a zero, but am not a liar nor I lack self-awareness. I think my score reflects my age (a little older) and would have been different had I taken this when I was younger.

[R24]

Eisenhower was the president when I was born, to give you an idea of my age.

We scored the same. Do you think I'm a liar?

I don't care what the keyboard warrior at {R23] thinks.

I got 11. Apparently, I'm a bit entitled, but have almost no vanity. No wonder it always took me so long to get dates.

And don't worry, I dropped the narcissist. Sure, it was already a little too late, but he's on the other side of the country now making someone else's life a living hell.

You can score a 0 by choosing the most altruistic, humblest answer each time, but every person alive on earth has at least one thing about them-- even the questions on leadership are not necessarily narcissistic but will add to the score. A zero demonstrates response bias, you're answering the questions in a way you think you should to be a good person.

"I don't care what the keyboard warrior at {[R23]] thinks."

A display of narcissism itself.

[R27]

They weren't all altruistic questions.

A number of them dealt with expectations of wealth, success, great attention. As I stated, I'm old and lived most of my life. I have no expectations there.

A number of questions dealt with leadership. I served in the military and left that career disabled. My leadership days are far behind me.

Speaking of disability - yeah, looking in the mirror is something I look forward to every day....

I took the test and scored a zero.

As for you [R23/28], not caring for someone who calls me a liar is not narcissism.

I think [R22] answered the question for me concerning age in taking this test.

Age and life experience plays a big role in the scores.

^^^^^ I think [R24] answered the question

Dismissing any criticisms or alternative viewpoints that contradict one's point of view IS a narcissistic trait. If you want to go in further, the questions should be answered with consideration for how you lived your entire life, not just how you perceive yourself in your elder years. Very few people with careers in the military are unassertive, are you saying you answered that honestly? You've asserted yourself here.

Anyway, the test is just a gauge. Take care.

I'm R6, who scored 4/40, and I can absolutely see someone scoring a 0/40 if they were humble, reserved, and content with life. What got me up to 4 were the times I selected answers like, "I think I am special." (And I do, damn it!)

R32 Not a narcissistic perspective, inherently. I happen to think everyone is extraordinary in some regard.

[R32]

Thank you!

"Reserved" is actually one of the biggest criticisms applied to me during my military days. I didn't fit in with the Alpha Big Dogs at all!

BTW, Narcissism is a mental illness. It's an abnormality. Of course there are people with no traits.

However, there are MANY mental illnesses out there.

All of us will have at least a trait or two of something wrong in us.

Here is the short SD3 'Dark Triad" test. Measures Narcissism, Machiavellianism and anti-sociality which often overlap.

I score 13/40 (0% Superiority and 0% Entitlement)

[quote]Would a narcissist suspect he/she is a narcissist?

Yes, they do know.

They simply don't care nor think that it's a problem.

I have a close friend who is a huge narcissist and it runs in her family big time. SHe complains vehemently about her sister having the problem and said a while back..................if I ever acted like that Id kill myself................she is actually worse than her sister so I think in a lot of people that have the trait ..... dont recognize it/

Its very hard to be her friend. She has almost no empathy and fakes caring about anything if it doesnt directly concern her. SHe is a beautiful woman but cant keep a boyfriend and never ever wanted kids and isnt good with them in general, dogs either.

Is being a narcissist the same as having a Narcissistic Personality Disorder? Because all the sources say that in order to be diagnosed with the disorder, you have to be the toxic kind of narcissist, otherwise it's just a matter of having some narcissistic traits, which many people do. Now, I rated myself as a level-5 narcissist, the long test confirmed this with a score of 20 out of 40, but as predicted I'm lacking in the toxic qualities - zero exploitativeness and very little entitlement. It's mostly about vanity and exhibitionism, with some superiority and (proven) leadership ability thrown in. My friends literally adore me and find me very sympathetic, if not intrinsically empathetic. So do I have the disorder or what?

[quote]but as predicted I'm lacking in the toxic qualities - zero exploitativeness and very little entitlement. It's mostly about vanity and exhibitionism, with some superiority and (proven) leadership ability thrown in.

"Toxic" is a silly, non-scientific label that has no place in serious conversations.

[quote]My friends literally adore me and find me very sympathetic, if not intrinsically empathetic. So do I have the disorder or what?

Who says irony and satire are dead on DL.

Even if you are, just roll with it. You’re perfect just the way you are!

I plan to, R42. It's served me well with friends and strangers alike. They think I'm adorable. :))