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Signs that a movie will be horrible

1. The advance publicity plays up the "hot" love scenes and how much chemistry the leads have... usually it means the leads will have no chemistry at all

by Anonymousreply 10010/13/2018

No pre-sceenings for critics.

by Anonymousreply 110/11/2018

It stars someone who became famous via a scandal

by Anonymousreply 210/11/2018

It has a superhero.

by Anonymousreply 310/11/2018

Some has been pop star lies and makes it out to be her big screen debut.

by Anonymousreply 410/11/2018

In the trailer, someone says, "I'll never give up on you."

by Anonymousreply 510/11/2018

It was a comic book first.

by Anonymousreply 610/11/2018

The trailer is the best part of the movie.

by Anonymousreply 710/11/2018

Made in Australia

by Anonymousreply 810/11/2018

Lynn Stairmaster predicts it will sweep the Oscars.

by Anonymousreply 910/11/2018

Orange filter.

by Anonymousreply 1010/11/2018

Vancouver or Montreal stands in for New York City.

by Anonymousreply 1110/11/2018

The trailer gives a two-second listing of the soundtrack artists, none of who were heard of more than three years ago.

An A-list actor's spouse or child has lead billing.

by Anonymousreply 1210/11/2018

Promo blurb "[star|director] fans will love this" -- completists only need watch.

Phonograph needle scratch sound stopping trailer music to connote a major sudden change in protagonist's situation.

by Anonymousreply 1310/11/2018

Three-dimensional/computer animation of beloved, wildly popular 20th-century comic strip character.

by Anonymousreply 1410/11/2018

Trailer touts ecstatic reviews from "Ain't it Cool" and "Rotten Tomatoes."

by Anonymousreply 1510/11/2018

It's a remake/reboot/rehash of a movie that came out like 15 years ago

Olivia Munn or Olivia Wilde are in it

by Anonymousreply 1610/11/2018

Madonna plays the lead and attempts one more time to act.

by Anonymousreply 1710/11/2018

Boasts great date night movie.

by Anonymousreply 1810/11/2018

GAP Playlist Troll is music consultant.

by Anonymousreply 1910/11/2018

Usually when it ends with the words "Part 3", "The Third Chapter", etc. Also look out for the words "Return to..."

by Anonymousreply 2010/11/2018

I'll go one better, R18 -- any movie that has to closely tie itself to an event ("Sure to be a Christmas classic for years to come!") is desperate.

by Anonymousreply 2110/11/2018

Sandra Bullock stars.

by Anonymousreply 2210/11/2018

[quote]Trailer touts ecstatic reviews from "Ain't it Cool" and "Rotten Tomatoes."

Or a critic you've never heard from some flyover newspaper/TV station, or a critic who's known for never giving a bad review.

by Anonymousreply 2310/11/2018

Ten minutes of beginning credits.

by Anonymousreply 2410/11/2018

It stars the offspring of a former movie star.

by Anonymousreply 2510/11/2018

people died making it.

by Anonymousreply 2610/11/2018

"From the studio that brought you..."

Not exactly a specific indication of quality.

by Anonymousreply 2710/11/2018

When the quote on the trailer/poster praises the cinematography. ("Four stars!")

by Anonymousreply 2810/11/2018

Stars an actor named "Chris."

by Anonymousreply 2910/11/2018

A supermodel has a hefty role in it. There are few exceptions, 5th Element being one.

by Anonymousreply 3010/11/2018

The tagline always starts with:

"This time it's personal."

by Anonymousreply 3110/11/2018

In promoting the film they keep bringing up someone's nude scene(s).

by Anonymousreply 3210/11/2018

When there are multiple commercials presenting the movie from every story line angle possible.

It's a comedy!

It's an action film!

It's a romcom!

It's a heartfelt drama!

It's a film for the whole family!

by Anonymousreply 3310/11/2018

Read between the lines. Look for words, phrases in the trailer script like “revival, In a world, in a time, in a place..., triumphant return to the screen, sequel, winner of Palme d’or, everyone’s favorite (fill in the blank). If the trailer script sounds like a movie you’ve seen before, it’s probably dreck.

by Anonymousreply 3410/11/2018

Julia Roberts is in it.

by Anonymousreply 3510/11/2018

I’ve found that whenever a movie commercial has the release date chyron on the screen from beginning to end, it tends to be garbage.

by Anonymousreply 3610/11/2018

Will Smith is in it.

by Anonymousreply 3710/11/2018

Trailer shows entire movie.

by Anonymousreply 3810/11/2018

"If you only see one movie this year..."

by Anonymousreply 3910/11/2018

The lead actors/actresses were models before branching off into film.

by Anonymousreply 4010/11/2018

If it is marketed as a sequel or prequel.

by Anonymousreply 4110/11/2018

Anytime a free screening pass is offered.

by Anonymousreply 4210/11/2018

I usually lose interest the minute I hear a voice-over narration at the beginning of a film.

by Anonymousreply 4310/11/2018

The trailer's narration starts with "In a world where..." something, followed by a pause, as an action clip is shown, then the narrator says, "it took one man..." then another pause as another action clip is shown, then "to make..." followed by the opposite of whatever the first thing was.

by Anonymousreply 4410/11/2018

When top billing goes to Henry Cavill or Matt Damon.

by Anonymousreply 4510/11/2018

It's anything to do dancers or singers struggling to become famous.

by Anonymousreply 4610/11/2018

The credits are in Comic Sans

by Anonymousreply 4710/11/2018

She is in it.

by Anonymousreply 4810/11/2018

If the taxes aren't taken out first from Fan Bingbing's paycheck.

by Anonymousreply 4910/11/2018

'by director bradley cooper'

by Anonymousreply 5010/11/2018

Its a remake of a beloved classic or has absurd stunt casting.

by Anonymousreply 5110/11/2018

If I’m not in it.

by Anonymousreply 5210/11/2018

_______ has never been better!

by Anonymousreply 5310/11/2018

Ansel Elgort stars as Tony

by Anonymousreply 5410/11/2018

The studio doesn't air it in advance for critics to review.

by Anonymousreply 5510/11/2018

The poster is awful

by Anonymousreply 5610/11/2018

Nicolas Cage's BIG COMEBACK!

by Anonymousreply 5710/11/2018

"An Alan Smithee Joint."

by Anonymousreply 5810/11/2018

If the trailer describes the film as quirky or edgy.

If everyone’s name must be preceded by an award win/nomination: starring Oscar winner Streep, Oscar nominee Amy Adams and Golden Globe nominee _______. If you’re not an Oscar winner/nominee, it’s not worth mentioning.

by Anonymousreply 5910/11/2018

Starring Adam Sandler

by Anonymousreply 6010/11/2018

A movie that originally had a white cast remade with a black cast

by Anonymousreply 6110/11/2018

r61 Cameron Diaz, Rose Byrne, and Bobby Cannavale are black?

by Anonymousreply 6210/11/2018

The good - Madonna in a supporting role

The bad - Madonna is the lead

The ugly - Directed by Madonna!

by Anonymousreply 6310/11/2018

The PR shills start threads on DL saying it has Oscar buzz.

by Anonymousreply 6410/11/2018

A handgun on the movie poster, with actors making intense faces in red or blue lighting and a shapley, young actress in the background.

by Anonymousreply 6510/11/2018

No R62, but Jamie Foxx and little black Annie are

by Anonymousreply 6610/11/2018

You get a used scratch n sniff card.

by Anonymousreply 6710/11/2018

"The PR shills start threads on DL saying it has Oscar buzz."

ROFLMAO, this one is so true! There was some troll saying that The Other Boleyn Girl was going to get tons of Oscar nominations including Best Actress for Natalie Portman.....then the movie actually came out, to mediocre box office and "meh" reviews.

by Anonymousreply 6810/11/2018

One word quotes from critics, movie blogs, and tweets.

by Anonymousreply 6910/11/2018

Directed by Michael Bay.

by Anonymousreply 7010/12/2018

All action, family/kids and horror movies.

by Anonymousreply 7110/12/2018

Framing a character from an much older time as "feminist".

by Anonymousreply 7210/12/2018

R72, feminism existed in the past.

by Anonymousreply 7310/12/2018

Released in January to March or August.

by Anonymousreply 7410/12/2018

It has Emma Watson in it.

by Anonymousreply 7510/12/2018

The only positive review is from Walter Monheit.

by Anonymousreply 7610/12/2018

I love you r76!

by Anonymousreply 7710/12/2018

Adam Sandler is in it.

by Anonymousreply 7810/12/2018

The blue screen does all the work in the movie.

by Anonymousreply 7910/12/2018

There's a group dance scene at the end of the trailer or a snippet of (middle-aged) women singing into hair brushes.

by Anonymousreply 8010/12/2018

Shut up G at R80

by Anonymousreply 8110/12/2018

"But they didn't count man!"

by Anonymousreply 8210/12/2018

An aging action hero, long past his prime, is kicking the asses of ripped 25 year-old men.

by Anonymousreply 8310/12/2018

r83 just described every Liam Neeson movie

by Anonymousreply 8410/12/2018

Starring Oprah.

by Anonymousreply 8510/12/2018

The theme song is by Eminem.

by Anonymousreply 8610/12/2018

It's released on VOD the same day

by Anonymousreply 8710/12/2018

Dumped in, like, 5 theaters to hide the fact that Kevin Spacey's in it

by Anonymousreply 8810/12/2018

Allison Janney is not in it.

by Anonymousreply 8910/12/2018

Mariah Carey is in it.

by Anonymousreply 9010/12/2018

I'm not in it or I passed on it.

by Anonymousreply 9110/12/2018

Any involvement of Adam Sandler.

by Anonymousreply 9210/12/2018

An HD copy is up on the streaming sites at the same time the movie hits theaters.

by Anonymousreply 9310/12/2018

Any shot that has the lead characters walking in a group towards the camera in slow motion.

by Anonymousreply 9410/13/2018

If it's a "triumph of the human spirit" Oscar bait movie

by Anonymousreply 9510/13/2018

[quote]If it's a "triumph of the human spirit" Oscar bait movie

"He thought losing his arms and legs was his biggest challenge, and then the Holocaust happened. From the Academy Award®-winning director (insert name of director who hasn't made an interesting movie in at least 15 years) comes a triumph of the human spirit....."

by Anonymousreply 9610/13/2018

Angelina Jolie is somehow involved, as an actress, director, producer, etc.

by Anonymousreply 9710/13/2018

Amy Schumer is in it

by Anonymousreply 9810/13/2018

Geraldine Chaplin is not in it.

by Anonymousreply 9910/13/2018

Judd Apatow is somehow involved with it.

by Anonymousreply 10010/13/2018
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