How to fight laziness?

Depression

How old are you and your general health how is it? Somewhere in the 50s it becomes impossible to work 6 days a week especially if there is a long commute. You might also get a compete physical and don't forget to check the heart.

R1

Seriously? I dont consider myself unhappy or sad person. I dont have sad thoughts often.

Depression

R2

I am 35 and healthy. I gained a lot of weight last year.

If you work 48 hours a week you’re not lazy. You’re just not putting a high enough priority on yourself. Do things that make you happy and you’ll discover that what you call laziness will fall away.

It sounds more like exhaustion than laziness.

You might be depressed. Get that checked out. Hire a cleaning service for 2 hours a week and/or on your day off, do your laundry. You can surf the net while the laundry is being done. Wash dishes before work or after. You can do 1 thing a day. Vacuum, wipe down the bathroom, change your sheets, etc. You can buy food that is healthy. Write it down and have a dedicated day for every job. Exercise, even if it means walking the dog or walking to the post office or store. Will power. You can do it.

OP, do you enjoy your work? I stayed at a job I hated for years and was much like you. Only after I left did I realize how much it sucked the life out of me.

Sounds like depression to me. I have Bipolar II and that just sounds like me in a down swing. You must find something you are passionate about - that's the big answer. The small answer is just do one small thing to improve your environment, go now and swish your toilet out with the brush and some bleach. Tomorrow you can buy some salad or wash up. Basically, anything you do is an improvement at this stage. You are not lazy you just need to care for yourself. Big hug, depression takes many forms and they all suck. I'm lucky, I get to go up too!

R6

I seriously dont know how to do it. I love movies. I love reading. I love quality tv. Love restaurants. But i just can't find something in me to enjoy it all. I watched new season of The walking dead.

R7

Maybe. But i know much older people who work just as much and then clean their house, cook dinners etc.

R8

Good post, sir. Thanks a lot. I am too ashamed to use cleaning service though.

Sounds like you’re working too much. You need TWO days off a week. I know this is going to shock the Americans on here but you are working too much!

R9

I do enjoy it. Its also Family business, so it's incredibly important for my family. We all depend on it. And it's a good job.

Get your testosterone levels checked. They do decrease in our 30s-40s.

It’s a family job? Tell your mom to stop being a slavedriver.

A family job is rarely ever a good job OP. Not only do you have a duty to your employer but you’re suckered in by family guilt.

Exercise every morning when you first wake up. Stretch your entire body and go for a fast 30 minute powerwalk. As you get stronger, hold 5lb weights in your hands. You will feel positive about yourself for the rest of the day.

When my friend is depressed his response is being hyper and cleans house top to bottom. My depression is to go to work and then nothing else. I wish my depression had a hyper element to it.

Your friend isn’t depressed R20. He’s manic.

Get a physical. Blood work might uncover a vitamin, electrolyte or other deficiency. I was working at a new, demanding job with odd hours. I found I was always tired, no motivation or energy to do anything but lay on the couch surfing the net for hours when I was off. Turns out I had a vitamin D deficiency, which is very common, especially in winter. Mine was down to 1/3 of what it should be. I've been taking a supplement and noticed a difference after about 3 weeks.

OP, I know exactly where you are coming from. I think mine is attributed to being perpetually single. Are you? I live alone and never have company, so why should the house be sparkling if only I'm going to see it? I keep it clean enough for myself - for example, I don't let dishes and clutter pile up but if you take a close look at the floors you'll certainly see dust.

A jalapeno up your butt should do the trick.

A lot of it may have to do with your diet if you're eating unhealthy foods, especially if they're loaded with sugar.

It’s possible you’re not lazy, just exhausted from working 6 days a week. I was working 6 + days a week at my last job and gained 20 pounds during that time. I loved my job but, being older & very introverted, really needed my weekends back to recharge. I also was angry at myself for allowing my employer to exploit my people-pleasing /“work ethic.” That chronic resentment was also exhausting. So I got a new job several months ago, am very firm about only working 5 days a week (which is the company norm) and am so much happier —and less “lazy.”

[quote] When my friend is depressed his response is being hyper and cleans house top to bottom.

I hope he lives alone. A roommate like that would drive me nuts.

Do you have a lot of clutter and cap you don't need? If so, put a large garbage bag in each room and work on filling them over the next week or two. Even if it's just a drawer or shelf at a time, it soon adds up. That way, cleaning is much easier too.

[quote] [R1] Seriously? I dont consider myself unhappy or sad person. I dont have sad thoughts often.

Depression is not just "considering yourself an unhappy or sad person." In fact, what you say at R11 is a classic sign of depression:

[quote] I love movies. I love reading. I love quality tv. Love restaurants. But i just can't find something in me to enjoy it all.

If i would work 6 days / week. I would be lazy too ! It’s pure exhaustion you’re suffering from .

R17 R18

Nah, it's a good job and it pays well. My mother worked six days a week for 25 years, and then did house work, and gardening on weekends. Her health is shit now.

R19 R22

I'll definitely do it. Thanks for advice.

Wellbutrin

R23

Yes, i am single and introverted, prefer to go out, rarely have guests. But my real problems started couple of years ago, while i was single for longer than that.

Her health is shit now.

Toots, so will yours be if you follow in mama’s footsteps. You’ve been warned.

R25

I did keto couple of years ago, and it was wonderful for me. My obsession with food was gone. But after some period of time i went back to carbs. And boom! Obsession, weight, sadness, feeling like shit. All back in my live.

Keto and all those other fad diets are wack. You just need a sensible diet combined with intermittent fasting and exercise. That’s the way man is supposed to operate, not loading up on bacon and butter and sour cream.

R26

Thanks. I am also people pleaser, and control freak, so i often think they can't do it without me. But they can.

R28

Not that much. But i have a lot of things in my house that aren't mine. My sister's old stuff. I think I'll get rid of it.

Same with me OP. You are not alone. And worse, I beat myself up over it so much that I often feel paralyzed and unable to drum up enough energy after a 40 hour week to go anywhere. It seems to have spiraled.

R29

I never thought about myself as depressive person. I am not very happy, but depressed?

Thanks. You and other people here seriously opened my eyes.

R37

What's intetmittent fasting? I loved this feeling of being on keto. But yeah, my weight spiraled out of control after years of holding it on the same level.

Take a vacation. Does your family allow you to do that. And most of that needs to be a staycation.

Take some time to get your stuff in order and do things you enjoy again.

Is there a way you can change your hours and work maybe 8-6 for 5 days instead of working 6 days a week. Really when I work 5 days a week at least 1/2 of my first day off is sleeping in late, doing chores and decomposing from the week. There isn't enough time for you to work 6 days a week and then enjoy the 1 day off.

It could be a simple case of fatigue from all the hours you work. It could be mild depression. The first and most common symptoms of depression aren’t sadness or feeling down, or hopelessness. The most common are fatigue, “laziness,” and a general lack of interest in doing things previously enjoyed. However, if left untreated, depression can worsen to include feeling down, poor self-esteem, and even suicidal ideation.

A lot of things can cause depression: chemical imbalance in the brain, high stress levels, grief related to loss, alcohol or drug abuse, hormone imbalance, hypothyroidism, cardiovascular disease or disorder, etc.

If I were you, I would try to reduce my work hours if possible, see a doctor and get blood drawn to check my TSH, hba1C, and testosterone levels, among other things. And increase my self-care! Good luck and take care of yourself!

Not OP, but I have been feeling the exact same way for several years. I had bloodwork done and I have low testosterone. My doctor wants me to take a synthetic hormone replacement but I heard that bio-identical is better. Kaiser doesn't do bio-identical HRT but I will pay out of pocket for it somewhere else if it's better for me. Has anyone been through this and any advice?

r42,

I'm not r37, but I have been reading about this. This is when you are only eating and getting calories for 8 hours of the day. and fasting the other 16. preferably, 8 hours of sleep and the other 8 hours are 4 hours after you wake and 4 hours before bedtime. The most challenging is in the am, which is skipping breakfast.

I'm surprised that many have commented that working 48 hours a week is excessive. It really isn't. There are other things going on with OP that need to be checked. Start with a physical.

R43

I have vacations, three or four every year. That's my reward. I am obsessed with travelling. But its very exhausting. I walk a lot when i travel.

R40

I beat myself so much. It'seriously almost crippling.

R46

You can eat all you want or still count calories?

[quote]How to fight laziness?

Wallop it with a broomstick.

OP, just bite the bullet and call a cleaning service. Believe me, they have seen it all. Get rid of all the clutter and have them come in and clean. It will probably cost a few hundred dollars for the first time but a single person living alone they can usually do a whole apartment or the four rooms you live in the most in 2 hours every other week.

I went through a spell when all I did was work and came home after a long day disgusted by all the dirty dishes and pots and pans overflowing from my sink, I bagged them all up and threw them away. That got me on a tear, and I got rid of so much crap. It was cathartic.

I also have to work out first thing every morning. Not only would I not do it otherwise, it really does get those endorphins going and helps me get through the day. If you don't want to go to a gym, go for a run or fast walk, but do some sort of exercise out of the house in sunlight and fresh air. It does wonders for your psyche.

R47 it's not the hours but rather the days. 6 days a week is too much over a prolonged period. He probably works more than 8 hours a day in his family's sweatshop.

How many hours a day do you work/commute, OP?

R54

8 hours from monday till friday, 6 hours - saturday.

You might also be addicted to your phone. It's a real thing now.

[quote] 8 hours from monday till friday, 6 hours - saturday.

It would be nice to have Saturdays off but your workload isn't all that much. Most people in corporate America work that much and more during a regular M - F week, and often bring home work on the weekends. I know many people who work second jobs after putting in a full week, people who go to school while working full time, serve on boards, teach classes, etc. and manage to keep up with housework, socializing, feeding themselves. Your problems go much deeper than working too much. Get a complete physical, and consider therapy because it does sound like low-level depression with a smartphone addiction. Good luck.

This is me except I take time to go to the gym and watch tv.

it is not uncommon to feel motivated, inspired and committed to a "job" and indifferent, uninspired, and unmotivated about your "personal" life.

Best thing a friend ever said to me was "you have an unhealthy relationship with your job" and it was true.

Figure out why your work matters to you and translate it to your life.

R58, I should clarify I work as little as possible (though 40/week) and don’t enjoy what I do, but I still get this way. Ditto R23. I’m becoming too used to my own company and on my phone a lot. It’s both depressing and comforting.

OP

I retired last year and have felt the same way and done the same things since. It's like the rat race is over after all these years and now I don't want to do squat. I just sit in front of the computer in my sweats. I've OD'd with online porn so I'm over that: too many tattoos and too few variations on the same theme but haven't found anything to replace it. I worked a lot when I was working and still managed to have an active social life, travelled, read books, kept the house (and me) in good shape. Now, I look at the kind of tasks I used to have do on the weekends because I had no other time and say, "fuck it" even though I have nothing else to do.

The doc says I'm not depressed and that it's normal to take some time to transition from one kind of life to another. But how much time?

[quote] . At the moment there is no clean plate at my house

Why aren't you buying paper plates?

Definitely sounds like depression, OP. Depression is not “sad thoughts,” although it is certainly fed by negative thoughts like “I think I am going crazy” or “my mind can’t do nothing else,” as seen in your post. Depression is not usually experienced as extreme sadness, and it doesn’t resemble the “woe is me” stereotypes that the media feeds us.

Depression is an oppressive feeling of hopelessness, an overbearing form of apathy, and a paralyzing fear of trying anything new, or anything at all. Your posts fairly drip with these impressions, OP.

See a shrink. It’s a common and very treatable problem that everyone battles at least once in a while.

Reframe your thoughts about it, dear OP.

As others have said, you’re beating yourself up for ‘laziness’ as if it’s a sin, when you may need to indulge in some off-time for any number of personal reasons.

And anyway, why is ‘laziness’ so maligned? We live in an age where productivity is seen as a kind of God and we’re expected to act as slaves to our own time. Some of the most fulfilled & interesting people on Earth could easily be viewed as ‘lazy’ in the eyes of our culture. Why not accept this quality as a vital & immutable part of yourself and see what changes for you?

[quote]Why aren't you buying paper plates?

Yeah. Dirty dishes and piles of used paper plates are the solution.

My favorite fictional character, The Joxter (From Tove Janssen’s MOOMIN stories) is a lazy fucker to rival all others. His life’s work involves sitting in an apple tree (where he is illegally squatting) and alternately heckling passers-by, smoking a pipe or sleeping off the excitement in his hammock.

Occasionally he does muster enough energy to come down the tree and take a bushel of apples to the ex-wife & passel of kids he rarely sees, or spread a little philosophy to his Moomin neighbours. But that’s the extent of his doings. Role model.

Unfortunately there are those of us who cannot afford a shrink, either not enough funds, insurance, or time.

Getting out each day to do something away from the house has helped me a little. Also, going for a walk in the morning or night after work before I get settled in. Once in and relaxing, I will be less likely to get up.

Any books or blogs or vlogs out there that you have used and found helpful?

Sometimes when I feel lazy I go to the hot bar at the supermarket, get some fried rice, a Rotisserie chicken and some veggies, and I'm good to go. And all of it is healthier than fast food and loads of carbs. If you want to lose weight you seem like the perfect candidate for one of those weight loss services that delivers meals to your house. Personally, I like the South Beach one. It seems like the healthiest option. Or go to the frozen foods section and look for some options. All I'm sayin is that you can eat healthier, take some vitamins, start walking and you will lose weight.