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Silliest "I'm not gay" statements ever made

Shemar Moore: "Send your Girlfriend over to my House"

Michelle Rodriguez: "Michi likes sausage"

Larry Craig: "I have a wide stance"

Care to add any others to the list?

by Anonymousreply 142August 19, 2018 6:39 PM

iconic

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by Anonymousreply 1December 14, 2016 4:26 PM

Rick Schroder: "With this ring, I thee wed."

John Travolta: "With this ring, I thee wed."

Tom Cruise: "With this ring, I thee wed."

by Anonymousreply 2December 14, 2016 4:27 PM

r1, I had forgotten about that. Hilarious.

by Anonymousreply 3December 14, 2016 4:32 PM

And since that's a double negative that means he's still gay.

by Anonymousreply 4December 14, 2016 4:35 PM

"I really, really like women."

by Anonymousreply 5December 14, 2016 4:38 PM

"I love women. I love how they smell."

by Anonymousreply 6December 14, 2016 4:46 PM

"I prefer to date in Europe."

by Anonymousreply 7December 14, 2016 4:48 PM

"I lost my virginity to a burlesque queen named Miss B. Haven."

"Sonja Henie broke my heart."

by Anonymousreply 8December 14, 2016 4:50 PM

Where is old Larry Craig?

by Anonymousreply 9December 14, 2016 4:53 PM

I prefer to date women - Troy Aikman

by Anonymousreply 10December 14, 2016 4:57 PM

That thing Jake said, reminiscent of Zac's "bathing in pussy" assertion.

by Anonymousreply 11December 14, 2016 5:01 PM

The "Michi loves sausage" line, I've got no problem buying Rodriguez as bisexual of the "men are for casual sex, not romance" variety.

by Anonymousreply 12December 14, 2016 5:05 PM

As I tell all my gentlemen callers..."I'm not Gay ". L Graham

by Anonymousreply 13December 14, 2016 5:08 PM

I want to have a wife and children someday.

by Anonymousreply 14December 14, 2016 5:16 PM

Matt Dallas's interview Howard Stern interview

"I don't know who Perez Hilton is but I'm definitely not gay, I slept with over 20 girls while I was still in highschool"

That giant queen who had probably just got fucked by Jonathan Bennett that morning was trying to act like he was some pussy hound.

by Anonymousreply 15December 14, 2016 5:36 PM

entire*

by Anonymousreply 16December 14, 2016 5:37 PM

OP = senator Restroom

by Anonymousreply 17December 14, 2016 6:17 PM

"He was just carrying my luggage!"

by Anonymousreply 18December 14, 2016 7:43 PM

I'm not a lesbian! I'm a woman! And a mother!

by Anonymousreply 19December 14, 2016 8:02 PM

"Diane, the love of my life" - Kevin, I was walking my dog, Spacey

by Anonymousreply 20December 14, 2016 8:08 PM

Liberace suing the 1950s tabloids for saying he was gay. And winning the case, plus damages.

Rock Hudson, by sham-marrying lezbo Phyllis Gates.

by Anonymousreply 21December 14, 2016 9:07 PM

[quote]"I don't know who Perez Hilton is but I'm definitely not gay, I slept with over 20 girls while I was still in highschool"

Yeah, he was so bored he fell asleep.

by Anonymousreply 22December 14, 2016 9:16 PM

"I like tits and ass."

by Anonymousreply 23December 14, 2016 9:51 PM

It's still ridiculous sounding, R12. Even more so because it's in the third person. I immediately thought of Ms Houston and her "Whitney is not gay" statement back in the 80s.

by Anonymousreply 24December 14, 2016 10:06 PM

Tom Cruise is a cutie-pie.

by Anonymousreply 25December 14, 2016 10:11 PM

^^ cutie-patootie

by Anonymousreply 26December 14, 2016 10:16 PM

Sure, Mr. Eisner, I'll make this movie where Bill Pullman plays my stalky boyfriend.

by Anonymousreply 27December 14, 2016 10:17 PM

Mark Oaten, a former Liberal Democrat MP in the UK, said he was not gay but instead blamed his affair with a rent boy on male pattern baldness

by Anonymousreply 28December 14, 2016 10:30 PM

"I prefer to date women - Troy Aikman"

Then dump the woman back at her house after the date and go home to my boyfriend

by Anonymousreply 29December 15, 2016 1:19 AM

"I'm dating Taylor Swift."

by Anonymousreply 30December 15, 2016 1:26 AM

^ HA!

by Anonymousreply 31December 15, 2016 1:34 AM

About 50% of male actors: "When I was in high school/college I couldn't play sports anymore because I injured myself, so I too up theater instead. Besides, it was a great way to meet girls!"

by Anonymousreply 32December 15, 2016 1:37 AM

"Mr. Wrong"

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by Anonymousreply 33December 15, 2016 1:52 AM

Mr. Wrong was......so wrong

by Anonymousreply 34December 15, 2016 2:12 AM

"I am in fact straight" -Louis Tomlinson

by Anonymousreply 35December 15, 2016 2:30 AM

r5, You win.

by Anonymousreply 36December 15, 2016 2:31 AM

r10, Pls show me a quote. Did America's quarterback really say that.

by Anonymousreply 37December 15, 2016 2:32 AM

Greg Ogallagher-"My big muscles are for attracting women" Yeah right.

by Anonymousreply 38December 15, 2016 2:47 AM

^ I don't know her

by Anonymousreply 39December 15, 2016 3:09 PM

"I just haven't found the 'one' yet."

by Anonymousreply 40December 15, 2016 3:12 PM

[quote]"I'm dating Taylor Swift."

Who was the beard of choice before Taylor Swift? Was it Cameron Diaz?

by Anonymousreply 41December 15, 2016 3:40 PM

[quote]Rick Schroder: "With this ring, I thee wed."

LOL Rick Schroder!? MEANWHILE, he's married with like 6 kids. That's a little excessive to stay in the closet, don't you think?

Hilarious.

by Anonymousreply 42December 15, 2016 3:43 PM

Yeah. WTF is it with DL and Rick S. He is straight. Get over it.

by Anonymousreply 43December 15, 2016 3:54 PM

[quote]LOL Rick Schroder!? MEANWHILE, he's married with like 6 kids. That's a little excessive to stay in the closet, don't you think?

[quote]Yeah. WTF is it with DL and Rick S. He is straight. Get over it.

He and his wife are divorcing. So the plot thickens. I wouldn't rule him out just yet.

by Anonymousreply 44December 15, 2016 3:56 PM

On the contrary, I knew a married Mormon closet case with 7 kids who openly boasted about taking male only trips to fuck his brother in Alaska.

by Anonymousreply 45December 15, 2016 3:57 PM

Openly in front of me that is, not in front of other Mormons.

by Anonymousreply 46December 15, 2016 3:57 PM

[quote]On the contrary, I knew a married Mormon closet case with 7 kids who openly boasted about taking male only trips to fuck his brother in Alaska.

Of course you did

by Anonymousreply 47December 15, 2016 4:01 PM

I did R47. I can even tell you where he retired although I was not his "buddy" and had no plan to keep in touch.

by Anonymousreply 48December 15, 2016 4:23 PM

Michi likes to get drunk and then drive .. and then when's she's caught and punished for it, she acts like a martyr. FUCK HER.

by Anonymousreply 49December 15, 2016 4:39 PM

gay --> man, lesbian --> woman. I'm not sure why we would consider rodruigez a gay person. The only lesbians that called themselves gay, imho, were confused babydykes in the 90's.

by Anonymousreply 50December 15, 2016 4:44 PM

"I never have been gay" - Larry Craig

by Anonymousreply 51December 16, 2016 12:04 AM

Li libeled!

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by Anonymousreply 52December 16, 2016 3:15 AM

Did Kevin Spacey ever make an official "I'm not gay" statements

by Anonymousreply 53December 16, 2016 2:49 PM

R50 What? A lesbian is gay. Not that I want to be included with you but anyway. Gay is synonymous with homosexual which lesbians are

by Anonymousreply 54December 16, 2016 2:58 PM

I'm not gay

by Anonymousreply 55December 16, 2016 3:05 PM

"I'm NOT a homosexual!"

by Anonymousreply 56December 16, 2016 3:15 PM

I want to be a gynecologist!

by Anonymousreply 57December 16, 2016 3:22 PM

To be fair, r56, he might have thought it was a microphone. And wanted to be sure there was no annoying feedback.

by Anonymousreply 58December 16, 2016 3:24 PM

R28 is the Rent Boy's Jizz the only known cure for baldness?

by Anonymousreply 59December 16, 2016 3:32 PM

r57, did he actually say that? If so, that's pathetic.

I think Jake Gyllenhaal's "tits and ass" comments would qualify for this thread, also

by Anonymousreply 60December 16, 2016 3:36 PM

Which no doubt explains why he's so enthusiastic about showbiz, r58.

by Anonymousreply 61December 16, 2016 3:48 PM

Actually r59, regardless of the efficacy of his jizz, the rent boy probably qualifies as a "comfort" rent boy under the ADA.

by Anonymousreply 62December 16, 2016 3:50 PM

'I had an isolated homosexual relationship, but now I want to have babies with my husband Larry.' Billie Jean King, after being outed in a lawsuit by her lady-panion while still married to her husband Larry.

by Anonymousreply 63December 16, 2016 4:38 PM

Well, at least Billie Jean is out now.

by Anonymousreply 64December 16, 2016 4:40 PM

[quote]Mark Oaten, a former Liberal Democrat MP in the UK, said he was not gay but instead blamed his affair with a rent boy on male pattern baldness

LOL. How did that supposedly work?

by Anonymousreply 65December 16, 2016 4:43 PM

Roberto Arango explained the appearance of his nude photos on Grindr (among them, some where he's presenting his hole) as "documenting his weight loss".

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by Anonymousreply 66December 16, 2016 4:49 PM

Gawker had oodles of fun with the Arango scandal. Best headline ever.

The uncensored photos were scrubbed long ago, but in one of them there was a huge black dildo on the floor that he had evidently been squatting on. His asshole looked like a vagina, with beef curtains even.

He finally came out a couple of years ago.

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by Anonymousreply 67December 16, 2016 5:06 PM

The Sense8 trailer reminded me of this gem.

Brian J Smith: "Me likey girls"

....Really queen?

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by Anonymousreply 68December 16, 2016 5:08 PM

The uncensored pics of Arango are still out there...

by Anonymousreply 69December 16, 2016 5:16 PM

"I was just being a Good Samaritan."

by Anonymousreply 70December 16, 2016 6:00 PM

[quote]LOL Rick Schroder!? MEANWHILE, he's married with like 6 kids. That's a little excessive to stay in the closet, don't you think? Hilarious.

They're divorced, and I've never seen him fake sexual chemistry with women on screen convincingly.

by Anonymousreply 71December 16, 2016 6:03 PM

Link, R69? I've searched to no avail.

by Anonymousreply 72December 16, 2016 6:24 PM

Oops, never mind!

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by Anonymousreply 73December 16, 2016 6:29 PM

The Eddie Murphy one was really sad/funny. Does he still pick up t-girls?

by Anonymousreply 74December 16, 2016 7:28 PM

Countless celebrities: "I don't believe in labels."

by Anonymousreply 75December 16, 2016 7:46 PM

R75, that's not really pretending to be straight, usually it's a step towards coming out as gay

by Anonymousreply 76December 16, 2016 10:23 PM

'Renate, I promise to love, protect and get a manly hard-on when I see you with no clothes on'

by Anonymousreply 77December 16, 2016 10:43 PM

Who was that Florida Republican who got caught sucking dick in a restroom and then blamed the scary black men?

by Anonymousreply 78December 16, 2016 11:04 PM

^ Bob Allen ... LOL

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by Anonymousreply 79December 16, 2016 11:09 PM

A judge in Washington, DC said he was doing research on homosexuals when he was busted at a gay cruising area in Northern Virginia...I think it was the notorious Belle Haven Marina.

by Anonymousreply 80December 16, 2016 11:18 PM

Eddie Murphy is not gay. I don't consider tranny chasers, family.

by Anonymousreply 81December 16, 2016 11:35 PM

When I hear someone call someone else a flamer, I literally see Ed Murphy in my mind's eye...

by Anonymousreply 82December 16, 2016 11:37 PM

"No, no. We don't have gay people in [italic]our[/italic] country."

by Anonymousreply 83December 16, 2016 11:43 PM

Eddie Murphy has been linked to men (Arsenio Hall, Johnny Gill) as well as T-gurls.

by Anonymousreply 84December 16, 2016 11:47 PM

I love men, but they wouldn't date me. (Paraphrasing the late Janet Reno)

by Anonymousreply 85December 17, 2016 12:45 AM

It's different in Europe...

by Anonymousreply 86December 17, 2016 12:46 AM

Disney Channel star Joey Bragg back in 2012....

"I am not gay (not that there is anything wrong with that) but Adam Levine is really good looking. Like...wow."

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by Anonymousreply 87December 17, 2016 1:10 AM

Joey Bragg...thinking about Adam Levine naked.

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by Anonymousreply 88December 17, 2016 1:45 AM

"I'm dating Debbie Gibson." ......Chris Bruno

by Anonymousreply 89December 17, 2016 1:58 AM

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

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by Anonymousreply 90December 17, 2016 2:58 AM

My celebrity crush is The Little Mermaid.

by Anonymousreply 91December 17, 2016 6:48 AM

That story was funny as hell, R90. Her former aide was fired after walking in on another aide about to go to town on Lt. Gov. Carroll's pork chop sandwich.

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by Anonymousreply 92December 17, 2016 6:49 AM

I can't propose to my girlfriend because the jewelry store is closed. There's videotape of it.

by Anonymousreply 93December 17, 2016 6:50 AM

I had forgotten about the twat at r90

by Anonymousreply 94December 18, 2016 12:23 AM

"Oprah...I'm in LOVE!" --- fortysomething, twice-married Tom Cruise, acting as if it's the first time he's ever been "in love".

by Anonymousreply 95December 18, 2016 1:15 AM

LOL @R32-- spot on!

by Anonymousreply 96December 18, 2016 1:21 AM

I've been hooking up with a guy - not a celebrity - and after we have sex, and he loves to get fucked, he will spend the night and in the morning just before he leaves he always says "you know I'm not gay right?" I'm like are you kidding me? I just fucked you and came in your mouth!

by Anonymousreply 97December 18, 2016 1:53 AM

To R97...I love when Str8 men say it...they make me laugh! you fuck hr married man silly, he swallows ur nutt 5 times during the night, u leave a load in his ass because he tells you he wants to have ur baby. In the morning, he says"you know I'm not gay" Its the funniest fucking thing ever.

by Anonymousreply 98December 18, 2016 2:04 AM

R98 is trying too hard

by Anonymousreply 99December 18, 2016 2:06 AM

You know I'm not gay. I'm doing penance for my sins. I was very bad this month.

by Anonymousreply 100December 18, 2016 2:23 AM

to R99, see i tried to be nice but u gotta be a "fucking asshole Douche-bag Fag" you are the type of FAGGOT in Philly we would beat up and piss on!

by Anonymousreply 101December 18, 2016 2:24 AM

Lovely

by Anonymousreply 102December 18, 2016 2:28 AM

don't forget me.

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by Anonymousreply 103December 18, 2016 2:53 AM

"No, actually we're just good friends."

by Anonymousreply 104December 18, 2016 3:20 AM

"I was simply giving him a thank you kiss for the goal he scored. Stop reading into it."

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by Anonymousreply 105December 18, 2016 4:15 AM

"It's just the rough nature of the sport."

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by Anonymousreply 106December 18, 2016 4:27 AM

I triped and landed on this dick.

Come on dude. You know I'm not like that. Come on I have a girl friend

by Anonymousreply 107December 18, 2016 4:49 AM

FABIO .... an anthropomorphized slab of beef with excellent hair, recently spoke to noted sex website Today about what he looks for in a woman.

Ready ?

I don't like complicated women. I like a simple woman and someone with a beautiful soul. Somebody who makes me laugh, somebody with a great sense of humor. Hmmmm. It’s eerily similar to how he describes his corporate relationship with I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!®. Fabio waxed poetic about the brand, saying:

They're nice, they're easygoing. They're really fun to work with. They're always trying to bring a twist of fantasy into a world where you turn on the news and everything is bad news, bad news. It's tongue in cheek. They don't take themselves too seriously, I don't take myself too seriously, so it's a perfect combination.

Oh, Fabio, can’t you see? Your perfect woman was has been right in front of you all along. (She’s a tub of butter substitute.)

That's not true. My ideal woman died tragically in an undocumented, impossible to prove automobile accident in the fall of 1992. Since then I've ever been able to get past the loss, the pain that I've carried everyday since whatserface died in that plane crash back in '94. Hey, if an impossible to prove dead gal worked for KEANU and RAYMOND BURR, then that's a good enough ruse for me !

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by Anonymousreply 108December 18, 2016 5:10 AM

Poor Flabio

by Anonymousreply 109December 18, 2016 5:12 AM

But it was a STRAIGHT foam party, and I never even took off my cha-cha heels.

by Anonymousreply 110December 18, 2016 5:29 AM

r103, that picture never stops being funny!

by Anonymousreply 111December 18, 2016 4:15 PM

We were teens enjoying the foolishness of youth

by Anonymousreply 112December 19, 2016 4:31 PM

r99 r101 Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?

by Anonymousreply 113December 19, 2016 4:43 PM

r98 Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth? Sorry r99 you sweet thing.

by Anonymousreply 114December 19, 2016 4:43 PM

[quote]I don't consider tranny chasers, family.

I don't consider them or any man who willingly fucks any other man heterosexual. Jenn-durr does not exist and what does not exist cannot be changed.

by Anonymousreply 115December 19, 2016 4:50 PM

Rick Schroeder?? What's he doing in this thread?

by Anonymousreply 116December 19, 2016 4:56 PM

The "I got a sports injury in school so I took up theater" excuse was used by Tom Cruise, among many others.

by Anonymousreply 117December 19, 2016 5:05 PM

I didn't know getting your hole streched in HS is considered a sport injury

by Anonymousreply 118December 19, 2016 6:36 PM

I'm pretty sure James Van Der Beek used the "sports injury" line

by Anonymousreply 119December 19, 2016 8:21 PM

Not sure I'd count tranny chasers as gay either. I think they're more akin to the straight men who fuck femmy guys in prison.

by Anonymousreply 120December 19, 2016 8:26 PM

I'd count them as gay if they also fuck men who aren't trans. Eddie does.

by Anonymousreply 121December 19, 2016 8:32 PM

Every lie of denial ever spewed out of scumbag Charlie Christ's flaming lips. IMO, he's the worst cunt that ever cunted.

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by Anonymousreply 122December 19, 2016 8:57 PM

......

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by Anonymousreply 123December 19, 2016 10:45 PM

"Spencer and I were in love"

by Anonymousreply 124December 19, 2016 10:49 PM

I never would have guessed Meredith Baxter was a lesbian. She married a man and had kids with him.

by Anonymousreply 125December 19, 2016 10:53 PM

The documentary Outrage has a hilarious interview with one of Charlie Crist's former "girlfriends"

by Anonymousreply 126December 20, 2016 12:16 AM

Yeah, absolutely r121 but all I've head about Eddie Murphy is that he picks up trannies and sucks on their big feet!

by Anonymousreply 127December 20, 2016 6:59 PM

He looks like he's going to the Folsom Street Fair with that mustache.

by Anonymousreply 128December 20, 2016 7:36 PM

Eddie is in a longterm affair with Johnny Gill

by Anonymousreply 129December 21, 2016 1:25 AM

Closet case and Mexican actor Andy Zuno is too poor to have a GF 😂😂😂

[Quote]So she asked if he had a girlfriend to which he answered that he doesn’t have the money to have a GF

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by Anonymousreply 130August 19, 2018 3:06 PM

r130, that hysterical. Are the Latin fangurls buying it?

by Anonymousreply 131August 19, 2018 3:39 PM

R131 Sadly, yes. What's funny is that Andy is liking pics of gay porn stars on Instagram. It doesn't take much to figure out he's closeted.

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by Anonymousreply 132August 19, 2018 3:54 PM

Well, a quality beard does cost. He's probably just being honest.

by Anonymousreply 133August 19, 2018 4:07 PM

I love the concept of an ADA-qualified “comfort rentboy”. Are they tax deductible?

by Anonymousreply 134August 19, 2018 4:15 PM

Clay Aiken's denial in [italic]Rolling Stone,[/italic] back before he got outed trolling for dick online, was not only sad but nonsensical. As Ray Barone once said, it's like his mouth fell down the stairs.

[quote]“One thing I’ve found of people in the public eye,” Aiken says, “either you’re a womanizer or you’ve got to be gay. Since I’m neither one of those, people are completely concerned about me. They’re like, ‘What are you, then?’ I’m sure it has to do with being raised by women. I wouldn’t want somebody gawking at my mom and grabbing her butt and catcalling at her, trying to hook up with her at a bar. I’m not saying I’m not going to look. Hello! But you know what I mean?”

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by Anonymousreply 135August 19, 2018 4:19 PM

For me, it's also silly when they're VERY positive about gay people, but still won't publicly admit to being one themselves.

[Quote]Who you choose to marry is really up to you and it's not something you should be judged on. I don't find being gay or lesbian to be a character flaw.

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by Anonymousreply 136August 19, 2018 4:54 PM

Wentworth Miller back when he was on Prison Break

[quote]“I’m not gay, but that rumor can’t be killed,” he told the Australian Associated Press “I know these rumors are out there … I’m cool with the fact that they exist, I mean this is about fantasy. Certain people are going to have certain fantasies, if someone wants to imagine me with a woman, or a man or one of each that’s cool with me as long as you keep watching the show.”

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by Anonymousreply 137August 19, 2018 5:00 PM

Shawn Mendes

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by Anonymousreply 138August 19, 2018 5:01 PM

Another twist on R136: "If we were gay, we would tell you."

by Anonymousreply 139August 19, 2018 5:20 PM

RDJ's "My bisexuality was manufactured and I am totally STRAIGHT!!!!!" interview.

by Anonymousreply 140August 19, 2018 5:30 PM

R137, yes I remember "pre-gay" Wentworth Miller. That was truly cringe-inducing. I like the guy, but (as with so many of these guys), they should just refuse to answer, instead of going on the record with (to put it frankly) lies.

by Anonymousreply 141August 19, 2018 6:36 PM

R138 Shawn still pings my gaydar.

by Anonymousreply 142August 19, 2018 6:39 PM
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