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Straight couples where the guy is hot/woman is ugly

The hot guy must be gay and closeted, right?

I've known two couples where the guy is gorgeous and fit and his wife is . . . rather unattractive. Both times, the guy came out as gay later on.

Then again, this scenario could easily describe many military men/military wives.

by Anonymousreply 11011/09/2013

[quote]OP some people marry for love and can see beyond looks.


by Anonymousreply 211/06/2013

Money. Anything from the fact that she's due to inherit millions- or she just has a really solid job that is catnip to average manwhores (motorcycles, trips and Rolexes).

It's all about perspective.

Women know they have to pay for primo cock.

by Anonymousreply 311/06/2013

My aunt and uncle. He was extremely attractive, she less so.

He was a serial cheater because he traveled for work and women threw themselves at him. They had a bitter divorce when she couldn't ignore it anymore, try as she might. My cousin told me that he had to be the better looking one. BTW, he's straight.

by Anonymousreply 411/06/2013

Is this the 30th thread with this theme in four months?

Get a life, OP.

by Anonymousreply 511/06/2013

Sometimes the wives are hot when they get married. And then..

by Anonymousreply 811/06/2013

For you OP!

by Anonymousreply 911/06/2013

I've always thought that when the match-up is as OP describes, then the guy is secretly or not-out-yet gay.

The guy gets the benefit of a wife and maybe kids, which stops the questions and speculation about his hidden orientation, and the girl gets a good looking husband and maybe some kids and will be too grateful to ask too many questions. At least for a while.

This is win-win for both parties, since he will now be divorced and have shown the world he married a woman, and she will be divorced and shown the world she is good enough to attract a nice looking guy, plus maybe get some kids out of the deal.

by Anonymousreply 1011/06/2013

OP, what makes you think closet cases even go for ugly women? I imagine if I had to have sex with a woman, I would want her to be hot.

by Anonymousreply 1111/06/2013

When the guy is hot and the woman is not, I usually think the guy has limited intelligence or lower self esteem. Sometimes the wife USED to be a hottie and then let herself go. High school sweetheart "syndrome." Or the husband wants someone to cook and clean and keep his house and shit out a few kids so HE can look like the "All American husband. She is the one with low self esteem. THAT cup finds THAT saucer, too.

Love is blind, yes, but...not usually. LOL

by Anonymousreply 1211/06/2013

What straight men find attractive at what gay men perceive as beauty aren't often the same thing. Big tits and blonde hair trump symmetrical facial features etc.

by Anonymousreply 1311/06/2013

R11, to answer my own question in a way, maybe the "homely" wife is low-maintenance, a good cook, is a fun in a fag-hag sorta way. I imagine those are reasons why closeted men beard up with unattractive women (see Hugh Jackman).

by Anonymousreply 1411/06/2013

r13 Not all men are into blond hair. But yes, straight men will ignore an ugly face if the women has a nice body.

by Anonymousreply 1511/06/2013

I can easily imagine a scenario like R4's - the homely wife is the "security", the one the husband knows is going to stay faithful to him without much maintenance or worry (as opposed to a hot wife with a lot of demands), and will cook, clean, pay the bills, take care of the children, etc. Meanwhile, he's free to engage in dalliances on the side while knowing he's got a sure thing at home.

Of course, you never know what a couple's relationship is really like - in the above, the wife could easily be a dominating control freak who keeps him in line, and the guy is secretly kind of a wuss (good looks does not equal confidence or inner strength) who likes being taken care of and having someone else telling him what to do. Think Marcie and Jefferson in "Married... With Children".

by Anonymousreply 1611/06/2013

Seriously, OP, your mentality is so shallow. Grow up. And if you're grown up, try to mature a little and get rid of this materialistic BS.

by Anonymousreply 1711/06/2013

Straight men marry plain women for fidelity and fuck around with hot women. A faithful wife = paternity certainty = evolutionary theory 101.

by Anonymousreply 1811/06/2013

Throughout nature the male animal is always the most beautiful. Why is this so shocking?

Maybe when she was younger she had a great rack, or a nice ass, or he loved her hair. All it takes for a woman to lose her looks is by having children. Children deplete a woman's body of protein and minerals. That is why mothers lose their teeth, hair, and age quicker than non-mothers.

by Anonymousreply 2011/06/2013

Damn, OP you don't know much about straight people, do you? But I'll only enlighten you about part of your question, and let others explain the rest.

I was IN the military, so I can explain that one for you. Many "men" (boys, really), go into the military to try to prove their masculinity. Part of that is being married and impregnating a woman. So they marry any girl that's handy (and, in military life, there aren't too many attractive straight women wandering around), and their wives start popping out kids.

But there's another reason many people don't know about: when I was in the Army (I can't vouch for now), when you got married, you automatically got a nice pay raise, and you got another pay raise for each kid your wife popped out for you. That shit adds up.

And yes, it IS similar to what's commonly known as "welfare."

by Anonymousreply 2111/06/2013

"Most women stop caring about their looks once they're married."

Let's hit Arby's before we board the plane, hm?

by Anonymousreply 2211/06/2013

Having been in the military I can explain the military thing for you.

First, where there is a large military base the ration of men to women suddenly becomes about 10:1. The native female population considers dating them seriously is beneath them. They may go out and fuck their brains out but never date them. However, the fat less attractive ones, well you get it.

Next, a soldier will marry the fat, less attractive ones for BAQ. That gets them out of the barracks and out of so much extra duty.

It often backfires. One of the sayings used to be: Join the army. Get a fucked up life and a fat wife.

by Anonymousreply 2311/06/2013

Yes OP every last one of 'em is gay and waiting for you to beat the closet outta their wicked straight acting asses. What's love gotta do with it??

by Anonymousreply 2411/06/2013

Somewhat like R12 said, there are many instances I know of where the goodlooking groom is a narcissist and really just wanted a spouse who would be an all-around slave to his fabulousness.

by Anonymousreply 2511/06/2013

If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, don't make a pretty woman your wife. From my particular point of view, get an ugly girl to marry you!

by Anonymousreply 2611/06/2013

I insist on being the pretty one, but I don't want a dog.

I'd like to believe there are some straight men who aren't as shallow as me.

by Anonymousreply 2711/06/2013

[quote]Children deplete a woman's body of protein and minerals. That is why mothers lose their teeth, hair, and age quicker than non-mothers.

R20 posting from his dial up connection in Appalachia.

by Anonymousreply 2811/06/2013

[quote] The native female population considers dating them seriously is beneath them. They may go out and fuck their brains out but never date them. However, the fat less attractive ones, well you get it.

Really? Why? Do they have better options around military bases? I would have though not.

I've read that the Marines actively discourage new recruits from getting married.

by Anonymousreply 2911/06/2013

I guess if I were a closeted gay man and were going to beard, it wouldn't matter much if the woman was attractive or not. What use would I have for some high-maintenance princess with tons of demands and a need for attention? From my experience, unattractive women are more low-maintenance and more fun anyway.

by Anonymousreply 3011/06/2013

Why are you looking at me???

by Anonymousreply 3111/06/2013

Yes. Local women who have a good job or plans to go on to college or have a serious career don't seriously date men in the military. Once you seriously date one and get married the woman's life becomes one of moving around, popping out kids, living in cheap on-post housing, or some rotten apartment they can afford with what they get on BAQ.

If the woman does want to work it's mostly stuff like cashier. What career job is open for a wife who will be moving about every two years?

A lot of the good looking ones, and ugh especially high school chick, would party with soldiers and fuck all night then leave. Seriously the barracks on weekends were like a roman orgy. Can't tell you how many times I'd be in my bunk and get woken up by one of my roommates fucking someone.

by Anonymousreply 3211/06/2013

But some of us do, R33.

by Anonymousreply 3411/06/2013

Alec Baldwin/Hilaria "The Famewhore Tart" Thomas Baldwin.

by Anonymousreply 3511/06/2013

Three possible reasons:

Guy is gay.

Woman has money.

Guy has little dick.

by Anonymousreply 3611/06/2013

r36, girl was hot when they got married, guy has mommy issues, girl is nice to be with, guy has low self esteem for whatever reason, etc.

by Anonymousreply 3711/06/2013

[quote]The native female population considers dating them seriously is beneath them.

That's right...I don't need no Okie from Muskogee; I can get that right here!

by Anonymousreply 3811/06/2013

I'm in the military and I remember a friend and I who would joke about guys with BMWs (Big Military Wives). Some of it has to do with the dearth of options surrounding a lot of military bases (which are in small towns). A lot of it has to do with the fact that these guy marry young, and their wives get fat after popping out children.

by Anonymousreply 3911/06/2013

"If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife..."

Man, she's ugly, but she sure can cook!

by Anonymousreply 4011/06/2013

I'm with r29 - WTF?

I would think that straight guys in the military would want nothing MORE than to fuck as many hot women as possible. Especially if they're moving around every few years.

Fuck their way across the USA. Are they as hard up for cash as to marry anybody? How bizarre.

by Anonymousreply 4111/06/2013

Well I also forgot the lonely part. I pretty much explained but A LOT of it has to do with getting out of the barracks.

by Anonymousreply 4211/06/2013

r41 - I think a lot has to do with whether or not they faced deployment.

Deployment and therefore possible death is a great motivator for procreation.

by Anonymousreply 4311/06/2013

R13 is right. Straight men's ideas of hot women are different from gay men. But also, DL is full of horny dudes who overrate the looks of straight guys. Most of those couples are probably evenly matched.

by Anonymousreply 4411/06/2013

Who knows, and the wives back home are usually banging half the town while the husband is gone.

by Anonymousreply 4511/06/2013

These men are heavily programmed. They get in line and stay in line. Independent living, like what R41 suggests, while more sensible and fun- sounding, requires some sense of personal choice, a sense of individuality. These soldiers are psy-op'ed to pursue an anachronistic mid-50's fantasy. Poor chumps.

by Anonymousreply 4611/06/2013

You have a point there, r43. I've known several guys like that.

The sad part is, a lot of them get dumped by the wife once they're gone for a while.

by Anonymousreply 4711/06/2013

Excuse me, R31, I believe they're looking at me.

by Anonymousreply 4811/06/2013

Well, why don't you enlighten us, r49?

by Anonymousreply 5011/06/2013

Yes, R49, tell us where any one of the posts in this thread are wrong. Please. Go on.

by Anonymousreply 5111/06/2013

R52, I think it's a bit naive and simplistic to think "they fell in love" is a complete explanation - HOW did they fall in love? What brought them together? If there's a severe disparity in a couple's looks - whether it be a gay couple, a lesbian couple, an unattractive man with an attractive woman, or an unattractive woman with an attractive man - most people will assume that the couple did not get together for the "usual" reasons (an initial physical attraction coupled with complementary personalities and values, etc.) and will look for additional factors that brought them together, shallow as they may be.

If you see an average looking guy with a bombshell wife, people start throwing out explanations like "he's got money", "he's got a big dick", "he's really confident in himself", etc. That doesn't mean the couple isn't in "love", just that the initial attraction probably wasn't based on his physical appearance. Same goes for attractive men with unattractive women.

by Anonymousreply 5311/07/2013

I think most straight females are attractive when they get married. However, many years of popping out kids, taking care of the husband, taking care of the kids, taking care of the house the chores takes it toll. Maybe they even have elderly relatives to take care of too. Lots of these females work too.

Women tend to be selfless and caring in nature more than men and put others first.

When the female was single she had more time for herself and grooming herself now she is married with a family she comes last.

by Anonymousreply 5411/07/2013

R54, if you don't take care of yourself, you are not good for anyone else. When you love people, you have to include yourself in the mix. Stella Dallas with the fat ass and fading looks would do well to remember this. It doesn't excuse a cheating spouse but hopefully she will think about kicking his philandering ass to the curb in such instances.

by Anonymousreply 5511/07/2013

[quote]When the female was single she had more time for herself and grooming herself now she is married with a family she comes last.

The sad truth.

by Anonymousreply 5611/07/2013

Everyone comments about my father being so much more good looking than my mother.

I don't know exactly how to explain it. I don't know for sure if my dad isn't closeted.

But what I see is that my mother is completely devoted to this rather horrible human being and that she brings in most of the money and they have the same values and interests.. I think he married her for support/devotion/his career. She does all of the housework, the cooking, the childcare, works full time at a good job and works for him in the evenings too. I don't know. I don't really see him cheating and I don't really think he is gay either but who knows. He just seems selfish and cold.

by Anonymousreply 5711/07/2013

If she'll do anal, she can go from a 3 to a 6. Rimming makes it an 8.

by Anonymousreply 6011/07/2013

[quote] If you see an average looking guy with a bombshell wife, people start throwing out explanations like "he's got money", "he's got a big dick"

"He's got a big dick" is not an explanation that anyone other than a gay man would apply to the couple you describe. You really are clueless.

by Anonymousreply 6111/07/2013

R57, I know a couple like this and think you are spot on in your remarks about the devotion of the less attractive spouse to the perceived-to-be hot spouse. The devoted one THINKS s/he got a real prize but doesn't realize S/HE IS the prize for doing all the work/being so devoted to/for someone who is not pulling his/her own weight. The couple I know consists of a very good looking man who dated every woman around before settling down. Many he dated were gorgeous, but not about to be slavish to him, and this did not sit well with him. The woman he married is good looking, but VERY low maintenance and low profile. He is the star in the family and comes first in every respect....just the way he likes it!

by Anonymousreply 6211/07/2013

The last Undercover boss, the wedding dress chain stores - The ceo was a former male model and very impressed with himself, then you saw his wife a squat short Philippino looking woman. During the whole show he seemed extremely uncomfortable around women. Stiff, stand offish and as one woman said "constantly checking himself out in the mirror." Only one woman did he connect with, an out lesbian manager and he did not seem warm to her until she mentioned she was hoping to marry her partner...I would bet good money that man is gay as a goose.

by Anonymousreply 6311/07/2013

R61, try hanging around some straight men and ask them why they think a hot woman would get with an average-looking straight guy (like themselves). Guarantee that "he's got a big dick" (and thus has a lot of sexual prowess that will satisfy her) will come up, whether in jest or not. There's an entire multi-million dollar industry that profits off of men's insecurities about their penis size, sexual performance and ability to satisfy women in the bedroom, so it's not just us silly gay men who think of it as a possible factor in a relationship.

Don't be under the mistaken impression that straight men value the same qualities in themselves that straight women would in terms of what they think makes them attractive, or vice versa.

by Anonymousreply 6411/07/2013

I'm a straight, married (and according to general consensus, hot) NYC woman here. After dating many trolls, I married my husband because he was the kindest man I'd ever met. We also have shared interests. Everything else -- including looks, size, income (which in his case are average) -- were not a priority. I did not settle. Can't say if this gives insight since our sitch is the reverse of OP's question.

Love the site, BTW. Best gossip by far.

by Anonymousreply 6511/07/2013

R65, congrats to you (sincerely), though the cynic in me doubts that many people have the sensitivity to value inner beauty so highly, at least upon a first meeting. If you asked straight guys what they thought was important to attract a woman, "kindness" would be pretty far down the list (and actually, many I know would respond with the opposite - "acting like an overconfident asshole bad-boy is more likely to attract her; nice guys finish last.")

And do this thought experiment - when people ask why you're with your husband, an explanation / justification ("he's kind"; "I did not settle") is given. If people ask why your husband is with you, it's likely they'll be satisfied with a simple "just look at her." It's shallow, but people don't search for explanations when you choose someone hot or hotter than you, but DO look for additional reasons when the reverse is true - which is one of the points of this thread.

by Anonymousreply 6611/07/2013

Love is blind unless he's broke or has a small penis.

by Anonymousreply 6711/07/2013

That was food for thought, R66. Let's say the hot woman (or man) dated other hotties but they were insufferable badboy or badgirls. Then miss or mister hot had enough, and settled down with the nice guy/girl. That's pretty much my story. I would guess that some (but not all) might also go this route if they realigned their values after tiring of the hot badboy/badgirl drama.

by Anonymousreply 6811/07/2013

OMG. Will someone just answer the question already? I say Rob Lowe and his fugly wife are a good example.

by Anonymousreply 6911/07/2013

A less attractive woman will cater more to their needs and ask for less in return. As simple as that.

by Anonymousreply 7011/07/2013

My grandmother was a truly stunning woman. She married my grandfather who was a red headed, about 6' 2", 140LBS soaking wet, wore those 1950s nerd glasses, and in his college yearbook photo was actually wearing a pocket protector.

They were head over heels in love. But, it was a truth that he was a bit whipped. She loved him completely and he worshiped her. Especially when they got old.

So maybe it's the one god/goddess per household rule.

by Anonymousreply 7211/07/2013

Bullshit r19

Women now a days tend to age better than most straight men who simply become uglier as they get older. Women, especially the ones with a higher SES, are far more health and looks conscious then men. Men tend to become lazy and sloppy with their looks as soon as they've settled with children.

Why do you think there is an increasing trend of middle aged women leaving their husbands for younger men.

by Anonymousreply 7411/07/2013

R74, you're forgetting a big aging factor for married women - having children. Childbirth will do a number on weight and hormonal levels, and the aftermath (caring for another human being 24/7) doesn't really leave most women time to go to the gym, eat healthy, or even do their hair properly unless they have help from others.

If they have money and can afford a nanny and a trainer, or have a husband who helps with the load, sure - they'll tend to keep their looks longer. But the same can be said of higher income men, unless they're workaholics who let it all go with too many expensive meals and drinks.

by Anonymousreply 7511/07/2013

Enough about the hot women/ugly man combo. Nobody gives a crap about that!

This thread is about beautiful/gorgeous men coupled with HIDEOUS women.

I can buy an ugly man/hot chick combination because of $$/women are less superficial, but the reverse does not apply to men. Men (straight and gay) are mostly shallow. A straight man coupled with an ugly woman is suspect of . . . something (lots of closet-cases use this strategy). That way they get a devoted/low maintenance wife and kids and they get to play around on the side with other men.

by Anonymousreply 7611/07/2013

Middle aged men are still considered more sexually desirable than middle aged women. Sorry, R74, but it's true. And R75 is right, childbirth is an instant ager.

by Anonymousreply 7711/07/2013

Nah, R76, I don't buy it. If I was closeted, I would want to be with a really good looking woman that I could at least find attractive as an aesthetic ideal. I would still like pretty things, wife/girlfriend included.

by Anonymousreply 7811/07/2013

R78, if I were closeted and bearding, I wouldn't give a crap if the woman is attractive or not because I'm not attracted to women at all anyway. Rather be with someone who is fun and down-to-Earth than some pampered princess with needs.

by Anonymousreply 7911/07/2013

No way a closet case is going to marry his hag, R79. No way.

by Anonymousreply 8011/07/2013

R71, R73, I am guessing that you pretty much decided what the "correct" answer was to this thread before you even read the responses. But then what would DL be without pointless bitchery?

by Anonymousreply 8111/07/2013

These threads are hilarious. A bunch of 12 year olds posting here. And loners. Or both.

by Anonymousreply 8511/07/2013

Um, it's not just about "tone" when one of you says of my post " I wonder if the disparity in looks between her and her husband is more in her own mind than anyone else's."

While the experiences/observations posted on this thread and similar to mine speak for themselves, there's no one catch-all reason for the looks disparity among couples.

by Anonymousreply 8611/07/2013

[quote]If I was closeted, I would want to be with a really good looking woman that I could at least find attractive as an aesthetic ideal.

Good looking women can find men who are actually attracted to them. They don't have to settle for some embarrassing closet case.

by Anonymousreply 8711/07/2013

Yeah, I was going to say R87, what makes anyone think it'd be easy for a closet-case, even if hot, to land a hot wife? She's more likely to be aware of her looks and know her options, and make him jump through more than a few hoops (which he might not have the patience for, since he's not particularly motivated to be with her anyway).

Although I could see another scenario where the closet-case is one of those prom king types who marries his high school or college sweetheart because it's expected of him, and everyone expects him to have a hot wife to fill out the image of successful heterosexuality, and she's none the wiser (and she's not on the singles market having tons of guys throw themselves at her).

by Anonymousreply 8811/07/2013

In terms of homely military wives with handsome soldier husbands, I tend to think that it's not about closeting per se. Military guys want a woman to keep the home fires burning, and they want a woman who they can trust to be faithful during military tours. Hot women, even if they are married to hot guys, are more likely to be tempted to stray.

More importantly, I think most military guys are more bonded to other military guys than they are to their wives. Homosocial bonding and all that. Women are an afterthought, no matter what the guys say.

Just my $0.02.

by Anonymousreply 9011/07/2013

Ditto, R46.

by Anonymousreply 9211/08/2013

You gays are embarrassing! R68 probably IS hot!

Damn! Drag her through the coals, why don't you?!

I think it's completely plausible for her to be the hotty of the two, and that after years of fucking (er..."dating") the badboys, she was over it and realized that all of that kind of stuff is unimportant. At that moment, her husband probably came in. I've seen it happen.

Nice guys DO finish last, but they finish nonetheless.

I do wonder if he ever thinks about what others think of you two, though. He must have realized he's one lucky fuck!

Have you guys ever SERIOUSLY spoken about the subject? Sorry, I've just always wondered about especially unequal couples.

by Anonymousreply 9311/08/2013

Thank you R93, and yes, he's brought it up. But that's not what this thread is about, so I'll just vamos. I do think I'm the luckiest person in the world to have the love of someone so kind.

by Anonymousreply 9411/09/2013

Why those 2 or 3 posters are attacking r65/68/81? I didn't find her post smug at all and her situation (hot woman/average guy) is very, very common. I, for one, welcome her perspective. Carry on r65, like you said, this wouldn't be DL without the pointless butchery. I think r71 and r73 actually wish they were a hot chick and could attract primo dick.

by Anonymousreply 9511/09/2013

All straight men are interested in are tits. Tits tits tits. If those tits are attached to a raving beauty, so much the better, if not tits are tits and fat women have much bigger tits.

by Anonymousreply 9611/09/2013

I was hoping for pictures in this thread, but I was wrong.

by Anonymousreply 9711/09/2013

I know a couple like this. Cute guy and morbidly obese woman. She was fat before the wedding and childbirth. She has a good job, she created a job for him. I don't know if he is gay but she worships him like a God. It's like any relationship really, both people need to get something out of it.

by Anonymousreply 9811/09/2013

This is r71, r95. I am a bisexual man who has great relationships with both women and men, some of them very attracive. So I have no need to be jealous of r65/68. Her posts simply rubbed me the wrong way the first time I read them. In hindsight, though, I think I overreacted. My apologies, r65/68.

by Anonymousreply 9911/09/2013

You guys over think the hot soldier/fat wife combo. And yes the husbands cared much more about the men in their company than their wives or kids. Or pretty much anything else. The Army life was just a hot fucking mess of a time. I actually really had a blast. Until the actual wars it was more like living in a frat.

by Anonymousreply 10011/09/2013

Yeah, those damn wars put an end to everybody's homoerotic fun. So bogus!

by Anonymousreply 10111/09/2013

R65's story sounds pretty romantic actually. So sick of seeing beautiful or even cute women with their big rocks on their fingers - socially sanctioned whores, really - thinking they won some hustle. Those rings indicate way more than they realize. Go hot mama at R65

by Anonymousreply 10211/09/2013

R101 sits in a cube all day.

by Anonymousreply 10311/09/2013

Don't knock til you tried it.

by Anonymousreply 10511/09/2013

R103 doesn't know how to fake a sarcasm.

by Anonymousreply 10611/09/2013

It wasn't sarcasm.

by Anonymousreply 10711/09/2013

OP, you are assuming that the attractive guy is shallow and values appearance more than anything. Many really attractive people don't value appearance more than anything and look for other qualities in close relationships.

by Anonymousreply 10811/09/2013

It basically matters how much of a looks-disparity there is. Most straight couples are roughly equivalent in attractiveness--except of course where a woman is essentially prostituting herself. It's not a matter of shallow or deep, just the way of the world. A gay couple is often different, I have noticed--and it's my own experience. Although gays are stigmatized--and self-stigmatize--as only going for looks, that's just the one-night stand, quickie phenomenon. Mainly, gay men are sensible about their partners, at least partly because they often permit themselves outside sources of sexual stimulation. All my subjective observations, without a doubt.

by Anonymousreply 10911/09/2013

I find that true of the gajillion-and-five white male/Asian female couples I see regularly.

by Anonymousreply 11011/09/2013
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