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DL help

I just paid the $18 so I hope the anonymity of the DL may help.

I am considered a very talented, successful agent. My lifestyle has provided me and my other half an extraordinary amount of time off (6 mos this past year) with homes in major cities in the United States. We travel extensively and while not "dripping in diamonds" we're at least upper middle class.

I am comfortable with my life. I love the co-captain in this relationship. He is my best friend. My best lover. We are content.

But, after over 15 years in said business, and while still young(ish) (42) and fit and attractive (it matters in my career), I can open my own firm and start with younger albeit slightly less successful friends/colleagues. Or I can stay with the large firm, continue to thrive while my superiors are buying mansions in the South, and making so much more money than me, a rain maker.

I have been pressured into starting my own firm. And bring with me some heavy hitters.

I love the anonymity of the DL so I ask, what would you do? Remain in a relatively stress-free life just thanking the gods that you're fortunate enough to live such a life...or....take a risk and start your own empire, with your own rules?

by Anonymousreply 6311/01/2013

How does a successful agent who doesn't work for himself get 6 months a year off work? And why do you need multiple homes "in major cities in the United States"?

by Anonymousreply 110/29/2013

There's no possible a way a successful agent can work 6 months of the year. Any good agent is working constantly for his or her clients. If you really are only working half-time, you're a half-assed agent.

This might be the worst EST ever. Not funny, not interesting, not provocative.

by Anonymousreply 210/29/2013

Are you a sports agent, literary, what?

by Anonymousreply 310/29/2013

This. Never. Happened.

by Anonymousreply 410/29/2013

Is the BF pressuring you into opening your own firm, or your clients. That makes a big difference.

by Anonymousreply 510/29/2013

Do not worry. Your $18 includes a five-pound bag of oranges, which will be overnighted to you posthaste.

by Anonymousreply 610/29/2013

I am an agent in an industry where we have "cycles" not years. If I am successful I can take some time off should I manage the position to my liking.

I've done this long enough. I know how to manipulate the system, as it were.

The question is to give up this lifestyle or start my own enterprise?

by Anonymousreply 710/29/2013

and, no, the bf is not pressuring me. He will accept any decision made since he's been a part of the discussion. It's said friends/colleagues and some family members who think now is the time for me to make the move.

I don't want any regrets down the road in life, but I also have firmly lived outside of society "norms" once I came out (to myself, and then the rest). That, to me, is when life began....I digress.

Is it shameful to suggest the status quo is the way to go knowing that should you choose its alternative, great success awaits you? Success as in material wealth and influence with your peers and social groups.

Which life is better?

by Anonymousreply 810/29/2013

I can't imagine any workplace where an employee can manage to take 6 months a year off work and no one knows or cares. Are you doing this to show off? Because we're not career counsellors and if you're so rich and successful, this is something you should be able to work out for yourself rather than asking a bunch of strangers on a gay message board.

by Anonymousreply 910/29/2013

If this is real and I think it is, why on earth would you need advice from anonymous people on the internet about your future life?

You will never explain the situation to DL to their satisfaction. There will always be someone who will negate and deny anything you write.

Only you know, in your heart, what is going on in your professional life. Listen to it, not your friends or strangers.

If you are as good as you say, why the hesitation? Go for it!

Good luck.

by Anonymousreply 1010/29/2013

Stay where you are. Seriously. If you're talking about "manipulating the system" to get more time off, I doubt opening your own business will be much fun for you. Anyone will tell that any new endeavor requires a lot of hard work. I'd rather work for someone than for myself. If you had a good roster of clients who were willing to go with you, then maybe. But it sounds like you enjoy the life you have now. Homes in major cities? Really?

by Anonymousreply 1110/29/2013

No one needs more than one home. My suggestion to you is sell your other homes and give the money to help the homeless and hungry.

You have the gall to be jealous of those with mansions instead of being grateful for having way too much in life, especially if what you say is true and you are so lazy that you only work 6 months out of the year.

Of course if you want even more time off maybe you should run for Congress.

by Anonymousreply 1210/29/2013

You lost me at 'dripping with diamonds.'

by Anonymousreply 1310/29/2013

Having home(s) plural in major cities (plural) makes you more than upper middle class.

You sound like you like your time off, being the boss, there is little of that in a start up and probably not for the next 5-7 years. You may have heavy hitters that will go with you but keep in mind your old firm will probably not be too happy so expect some backlash.

It sounds like you have a very nice life now and are set for the future. Why be greedy? If it is true drive and ambition and you are willing to sacrifice your nice quite life then go for it.

I would ask if you are really that talented and successful why not try to buy in to a partnership at your company?

by Anonymousreply 1410/29/2013

OP - either you want to run a business or you don't. It's as simple as that. If being a business owner isn't what you want - then don't do it.

Can you change agencies and negotiate a bigger salary? Then use that offer to demand more $ from your existing agency? Maybe you could start an in house boutique within your own agency and earn a much greater profit?

by Anonymousreply 1510/29/2013

Didn't we just have the "I'm 40, still pretty, and yet..." thread last week?


by Anonymousreply 1610/29/2013

OP, how should we know if you have what it takes to start your own firm?

I made the choice, and have never regretted it, even with many downturns and challenges. I, too, have a partner, but would never use such a bizarre term such as "co-captain" unless the business we started concerned a fishing fleet. There is no security today, even with working with a large firm in any field - the only thing one can get is a good exit package, and the more senior you are the more vulnerable you are to being scapegoated.

But the whole thread sounds a little like Bobby Ewing deciding whether or not to start his own oil company.

by Anonymousreply 1710/29/2013

Bitch puhLEEZ.

by Anonymousreply 1810/29/2013


by Anonymousreply 1910/29/2013

LOL, reallly to some of your comments.

I assure you I am real. Why am I asking the DL? None of you knows me. I ask close confidants and relatives and I hear their advice, yet think perhaps it's said for their own benefit.

You have no stake in any decision I make.

I enjoy life. I think I stated I felt fortunate. I am, however, worth my value in my firm. I haven't asked for a stake in it since I'm fairly certain it wouldn't happen (others have tried, failed, and, for the most part, never succeeded farther).

I am 90% certain with hard work and dedication and passion I would make this new enterprise a raging success. Live in a seaside mansion, or hillside estate. Or condo in the sky. The point is, I feel confident I could achieve that.

But, at what cost? Is it so bad to be just second best in re: financial well being and influence vs. what perhaps is life: smelling the roses? I already own valuable real estate, have a wonderful stud of a partner in life, and a relatively easy life. Why do I have an urge to rock this boat?

by Anonymousreply 2010/29/2013

Substitute Lawyer for Agent and you have the latest episode of The Good Wife.

by Anonymousreply 2110/29/2013

Seripusly, OP. There are people on this board who are struggling to make ends meet. You sound insufferable and are just using this as an excuse to show off. You sound bored with your life (and your referencing of your partner as a 'stud' speaks volumes to your maturity and attitude). Maybe quit your job and do something worthwhile with your tiime and money.

by Anonymousreply 2210/29/2013

Depends on what you value. In your case, I would start my own firm. You'll probably never be at a better time to do it - 42 is a good age since you have some real experience but still hopefully some youthful drive and some time to really build something that you could lead.

But for me, I love what I do (not agenting) and I crave the chance to do it at the highest level. I would never want to take 6 months a year off, even if I could.

If what you want is a life where you're not tied down and you want to reap the benefits of a luxurious life with a minimum amount of stress, stay where you are. If you crave an adventure and want more out of your professional life and want to be at the head of something that's your own, start your firm and do it now while people are hurting for work and you can get some amazing talent in on the ground floor with you.

But it sounds to me like you're happy with the way things are, in which case ride the wave and enjoy your multiple homes. Me, I'd get restless and itchy.

by Anonymousreply 2310/29/2013

Perhaps if you aren't able to make the decision and have to ask DL, the uncertainties, pressures, and sacrifices required to go it alone are already giving you pause for thought. Truthfully, how great is your appetite for risk, OP?

by Anonymousreply 2410/29/2013

This story is so FAAAAAKE. And if not, you're really a tedious asshole, OP. I would fire you.

by Anonymousreply 2510/29/2013

The urge is because you are bored. You reached a certain level and ask yourself is this it?

As successful as you think you will be, it will still take a lot of work. And you know it will distract you from being complacent.

But say you do all that - and you are successful in 5 years..what then? You will still be bored. Maybe it's not that you need more, maybe you ust need to re-evaluate what makes you happy and do that.

by Anonymousreply 2610/30/2013

Stick with your current position and make some good investments, honey. There are too many changes in the world going on right now to take any more risks than you have to.

At the risk of sounding like a tin-hatter, you have absolutely no reason to believe the current situation -- your health, your field, your houses, your country, the world -- will be static.

You seem awfully old not to understand that everything changes -- and your generation better "get it" quick if you haven't figured it out yet. The time may come when your money will be worth nothing. Your property could be seized by the people OR by the government. You could get hit by a car and be paralyzed for the rest of your life. We take so much for granted when we make our silly plans. Trust me -- shit happens, even to rich good-looking people. Or perhaps, as the "class war" continues, especially.

Live for today, but be careful about tomorrow. You never know.

by Anonymousreply 2710/30/2013

Well, on behalf of everyone at DataLounge, we welcome Walter Mitty as our new member.

by Anonymousreply 2810/30/2013

This is not the time to start your own business.

by Anonymousreply 2910/30/2013


Unless you are buying "Mansions in the south" like your superiors, I consider you a horrible failure.

Where did I go wrong???

by Anonymousreply 3010/30/2013

[all posts by tedious, racist idiot removed.]

by Anonymousreply 3110/30/2013

[all posts by tedious, racist idiot removed.]

by Anonymousreply 3210/30/2013

[all posts by tedious, racist idiot removed.]

by Anonymousreply 3310/30/2013

OP is trollerina

by Anonymousreply 3410/30/2013

Go for it, OP. You will never be happy staying in your current position. You only live once.

by Anonymousreply 3510/30/2013

You sure as fuck won't have 6 months off a year if you start your own business. Once you start your own business, your life will never be your own again.

You'll have employees with all their problems to manage, payrolls to meet, state and federal laws and regulations to follow, and responsibility for many other critical details you're not currently on the hook for.

There are NO guarantees in this life - how do you know the planets will actually align in your favor to make a success of starting your own business? Answer: You totally don't.

So would you rather be sorry you didn't take all those headaches and heartaches on, just so you could be a business owner and possibly rack up even more wealth and prestige, or sorry that you DID, especially considering your current wealth (yes, I said "wealth" - "upper middle class," my ASS) and free time?

Only you know.

by Anonymousreply 3610/30/2013

This is one of those threads where the OP is too ridiculous to consider advising. The foot just goes deeper into the throat and the silly contradictions fly faster. Troll? Homes in large cities- why? Mansions in the South- huh? Live in a tower in the sky? Perhaps the OP wants to cruise the Med- live in a charley in the mountains and enjoy the respect of Wall Street titans- or Hollywood stars- oh such decisions.

by Anonymousreply 3710/31/2013

[quote]I have been pressured into

Is it something YOU want to do? If not, don't do it.

by Anonymousreply 3810/31/2013

What a bore. Cut the humblebrag shit; you're just a shill.

by Anonymousreply 3910/31/2013

Yeah, worse than that. You're a shillerina!

by Anonymousreply 4010/31/2013

Coupla things:

You say it's "important" in your industry to remain fit and pretty. How much longer do you presume you will be attractive enough to continue to operate at the top of your game, OP? A few years as best. So, whether you stay in your current position, or strike out on your own, it sounds like the roller coaster cart is slowly clicking to the top and will be heading down hill fast fairly soon.

High performing underlings ALWAYS think their contribution is greater than it truly is. They never recognize their own career mortality. You can and will be replaced. Top dogs never fully comprehend how hard it is to start a business and be the one to wear all the hats, take all the risk, provide ongoing investment, and be under stress 24/7. Stake your own claim, OP.......or don't. But don't pretend you've been taken advantage of all these years when someone else has taken all the risk.

I'm in the exact opposite position as you, OP. I'd gladly give up the headache of running my own business right now if I could cash out and vacation comfortably 6 months a year. Can't though, so I guess I'm stuck going to that court hearing next week (thief ex-employee), conducting a payroll audit and working on finding a new insurance carrier (we got the boot for too many WC claims). Oh, how fun and exciting it is owning your own business.

by Anonymousreply 4110/31/2013

A key element of a certain type of DL troll post is having something that will incite envy--a 12-in. cock,multiple lovers, s huge fortune--and then complaining about a "problem," which is a choice between two very attractive outcomes. This one is so formulaic, it's boring. OP is aiming for two types of responses--the gullible who are deeply concerned with his problems and the jealous, who want to be in his shoes. It's narcissism and a sort of warped performance art.

by Anonymousreply 4210/31/2013

Is OP Josh Altman?

by Anonymousreply 4310/31/2013

Not 42 and not attractive, R43.

by Anonymousreply 4410/31/2013


by Anonymousreply 4510/31/2013

OP, opening your own business will make you fat. Google cortisol.

But thank you for "mansions in the South."

by Anonymousreply 4610/31/2013

NARCISSISTS personality disorder! That is you OP Douchbag! Die in a grease fire.

by Anonymousreply 4710/31/2013

You might have what it takes to start a business, but you don't have what it takes to manage it. What you will really need is a trustworthy manager or COO. Don't strike out on your own without that person in place.

by Anonymousreply 4810/31/2013

Do whatever engages your passion.

by Anonymousreply 4910/31/2013

I run a business. I would never hire you based on what you've said. Owning a business requires hard work. Stay where you are and insider yourself lucky.

by Anonymousreply 5010/31/2013

[quote]while my superiors are buying mansions in the South

If you have several homes in major cities, why are you envious of someone with a mansion in the South?

Presumably, you could have your own if you wanted, but you chose to buy several smaller homes in big cities.

by Anonymousreply 5110/31/2013

Have the EST trolls retired the phrase, "looks good on paper"? Kinda miss that.

by Anonymousreply 5210/31/2013

Along the same lines, I ride a unicorn to work and live in a candy factory . All of our workers are AnF models with big dicks who love to fuck at any time. I am often stopped and begged to give my secret to my good looks and hot body. Should i kill myself?

by Anonymousreply 5310/31/2013

this is why I love the DL. Some whack jobs, but I got what I needed from those who knew my post was authentic.

Not that I need to defend myself since we're all anonymous, but, again, I assure you that my post is true.

I live in a major city, and spend considerable time in another major city on an ocean.

My superiors are buying and building mansions in really nice places and countries.

I will emphasize again that I feel lucky and thank the gods daily for my life. I also feel I met XX for a reason. I just don't want to make any errors since the next few years are imperative with accepting your life as it is.

BTW, I'm still on holiday, and I write this from a beach-side terrace. I think I will stay put and see how the future unfolds.

If I continue to stay lucky, I may regret not driving the new car every two years, and having a house in the south of France, but I hope I could say I lived a life worth living.

by Anonymousreply 5410/31/2013

[quote] making so much more money than me....

One assumes that you are not a literary agent.

by Anonymousreply 5510/31/2013

OP, if you had even a shred of creative writing skills we might believe you.

by Anonymousreply 5610/31/2013

[quote]Along the same lines, I ride a unicorn to work and live in a candy factory . All of our workers are AnF models with big dicks who love to fuck at any time. I am often stopped and begged to give my secret to my good looks and hot body. Should i kill myself?

Nails it!

by Anonymousreply 5710/31/2013

If you really work for a large talent firm, color me shocked that they have not had you sign an non compete clause. If you start your own firm and bring with you some heavy hitters, be prepared for them to sue you. While they might not win, they could quite well bankrupt you fighting the lawsuit. Sometimes it is not as great as it seems to be the one in charge. Doubtful that if you run the company that you will be able to take 6 months off per year. Only you can really make this decision, but just some thing for you to think about. It sounds like things are pretty sweet for you right now, will more money make you any happier?

by Anonymousreply 5810/31/2013

I’m a famous artist! A celebrated artist! Everybody knows my name. Those who can afford me willingly accord me Riches and vast acclaim. Hanging with Madonna, Kate and Stella, Having an affair with Donatella, I’m so great! I can’t wait To see my latest exhibition at the Tate!

I’ll show my grungy old bed with my grungy old sheets And a couple of furry old lavatory seats. Yes, but is it Art? It’s Tracy Emin’s pubic hair.

I built a seminal copy of a Jimmy Choo shoe Brilliantly sculpted from my grandmother’s poo! Yes, but is it Art? It is, because it’s not a pair.

My latest installation Is on teenage masturbation, Celebrating shape and size. My head of Alan Freeman Made from frozen blocks of semen Has got me on the shortlist for the Turner prize.

Oh, I turned the lights off to symbolize pain, And when I’d had enough, I turned ‘em on again. Yes, but is it Art? Well, I couldn’t find the chair.

I deliberately puked on the gallery floor, Then ate it up in public till I barfed some more. Yes, but is it Art? Yes, it’s a statement of despair.

I prove the critics quite wrong Who said that painting was dead; I took a pot of Dulux and I stippled my head. Yes, but is it Art? Well, it took ages to prepare.

Oh I challenged the aesthetic When I kicked my Dad’s prosthetic Right across the Humber bridge. Then I took a fresh placenta, Dyed it bright magenta And held the exhibition in Nigella’s fridge.

I made a ten second film about the ballpoint men And showed it over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. Yes, but is it Art? I don’t know, and I don’t care – And that’s cause I’m a millionaire.

by Anonymousreply 5910/31/2013

OP is a world class doodie and a temp.

by Anonymousreply 6010/31/2013

You realize you can drive a new car every two years by leasing - and since you are an agent probably write off the lease as a business expense.

by Anonymousreply 6110/31/2013

I sincerely appreciate your asking for my opinion, but I am still fighting my company's insistance that I wear steel toed boots or shoes when all I do is mop the floors on the odd numbered floors when this building is shut down. I can't rrmember when a true executive like you valued my opinion.

I say, stay with your current company and insist everyone wear steel toed shoes. This will piss everyone off and you will get fabulous (yes, even gay sanitary engineers say "fabulous") seperation bonus. You can use this wad of cash for that wall paneling in your new corporate offices.

by Anonymousreply 6210/31/2013

Hey OP, the fries are up.

by Anonymousreply 6311/01/2013
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