I just checked Yelp for some reviews of gay places in a city I will be visiting shortly.
The reviews of one large dance club had mostly straight women reviewing it and they all loved it. They loved the music, the atmosphere, not being groped, the drag shows, the friendliness, the great service, the dancing, etc.
The only bad reviews were from a couple of gay men who complained about rude service, ugly people, and long lineups.
So that's pretty much it right there. Straight women and gay men seem to have completely different experiences of gay bars. Women love the novelty, fun, and uniqueness of it and enjoy it for what it is and don't take it seriously. Gay men seem to forget about all that and focus on personal slights and minor inconveniences. They perhaps place too much importance on it.