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Who shall we cast to play Malala?

It's inevitable bitches.

by Anonymousreply 8310/16/2013

It's already been offered to Meryl.

by Anonymousreply 110/13/2013

Fuck M, I'm first in this line

by Anonymousreply 210/13/2013

I have the range to play older than my age.

by Anonymousreply 310/13/2013

Will Smith's daughter. Thankfully, I've forgotten her name.

by Anonymousreply 410/13/2013

O, I couldn't posib...give me that script!!!!!

by Anonymousreply 510/13/2013

I know her pain in my soul since my husb-- I mean, fiance passed away. I am the only one capable of bringing that pain to the film-going public.

by Anonymousreply 610/13/2013

Aishwarya Rai.

by Anonymousreply 710/13/2013

The Pepsi "ba ba ba ba ba" girl

by Anonymousreply 810/13/2013

LOL @ this US centric list.

by Anonymousreply 910/13/2013

Padma Lakshmi (but they'll probably get Freida Pinto).

by Anonymousreply 1010/13/2013

Jennifer Anniston

by Anonymousreply 1110/13/2013

I have Miss Witherspoon on Line One.

by Anonymousreply 1210/13/2013

Horatio Sanz if she doesn't put down the fork.

by Anonymousreply 1310/13/2013

Andrea Martin in her Pirini Scleroso persona.

by Anonymousreply 1410/13/2013

Me Beiber

by Anonymousreply 1510/13/2013

It's already been reported in Variety that Selena Gomez is playing Malala.

by Anonymousreply 1610/13/2013

[quote]It's already been reported in Variety that Selena Gomez is playing Malala.

Selena Gomez can barely play herself, let alone someone else.

by Anonymousreply 1710/13/2013

Miley Cyrus. She will break a little dance after been shoot

by Anonymousreply 1810/13/2013

Oprah of course or precious

by Anonymousreply 1910/13/2013

Jaden Smith

by Anonymousreply 2010/13/2013

Creative Director / Choreographer / Actor:

Beau Casper Smart, Jennifer Lopez' boyfriend. That boy needs something on the "actor" portion of his resume.

by Anonymousreply 2110/13/2013

I'm crying as I type this. Tears of Laughter.

Best. Thread. Ever. Laugh out loud funny.

Angelina Jolie has already agreed to direct, and they are currently searching for an unknown Pakistani actress. Angelina wants someone who is willing to be shot in the head for the sake of authenticity.

by Anonymousreply 2210/13/2013

I forgot to add that Brad Pitt has been cast as Malala's father.

by Anonymousreply 2310/13/2013

This Malala chick annoys me, and the whoring of her by Diane Sawyer and Christiane Aman-"purr" should be shameful to them. I think what she did was brave and her continued efforts were noble, but she has become a media caricature. She seems to be complicit in it.

by Anonymousreply 2410/13/2013

R24 = president and only member of her local chapter of the Miley Cyrus fan club.

by Anonymousreply 2510/13/2013

Abigail Breslin has already been offered the role, in fact she is letting her mustache and eyebrow grow out.

by Anonymousreply 2610/13/2013

Shut up, Dakota!

by Anonymousreply 2710/13/2013

Why, "bitches", OP? .. Why, suddenly, are posters referring to peole who read and post on DL as bitches? .. Is it meant to be a term of endearment? Cameraderie? Inclusiveness? .. It's really derogatory, and unnecessary. It speaks volumes about the caliber and station of the individual who uses it. Lowest common denominator. Crass trash. .. Just saying.

by Anonymousreply 2810/13/2013

You must be new here, R28.

by Anonymousreply 2910/13/2013

"Suddenly"? Are you fucking new here?

by Anonymousreply 3010/13/2013

Willow Smith

"I whip my hair and then I get shot!"

by Anonymousreply 3110/13/2013

Malala has a book coming out, so this is the press junket for her book. Nothing wrong or unusual about it at all. It's also the first opportunity for her to talk to the world since she recovered from the extensive surgery and rehab that she went thru after being shot in the head. I think she's pretty remarkable. The casting for the movie thread is a hilarious idea. Let's continue.

by Anonymousreply 3210/13/2013

This role will be my greatest achievement.

by Anonymousreply 3310/13/2013

I am Spar-...I mean Malala!

by Anonymousreply 3410/13/2013

she has already fired her manager and agent after she learned that Jon Stewart is Jewish.

by Anonymousreply 3510/13/2013

"I forgot to add that Brad Pitt has been cast as Malala's father."

Well he is mixed race, so it could work.

by Anonymousreply 3610/13/2013

[quote]Angelina wants someone who is willing to be shot in the head for the sake of authenticity.

LOL!

by Anonymousreply 3710/13/2013

Obviously there will be a role for me, most likely the mother.

by Anonymousreply 3810/13/2013

Step aside bitches. This one is mine.

Fantasia Barrino

by Anonymousreply 3910/13/2013

[quote]Angelina wants someone who is willing to be shot in the head for the sake of authenticity.

Has she considered Jennifer Aniston?

by Anonymousreply 4010/13/2013

No. As hard as she tried, Angie couldn't see Jennifer as a 14 yr.old even with Ray Charles eyesight.

by Anonymousreply 4110/13/2013

I've already contacted Steven to pull some strings and get me this role. So this part is mine, bitches.

Quvenzhané

by Anonymousreply 4210/13/2013

R28. Your prissiness wounds--it is killing queer teens and making the rest of us want to kick you in the ass.

by Anonymousreply 4310/13/2013

Linda Hunt

by Anonymousreply 4410/13/2013

Sally Field would be great!

by Anonymousreply 4510/13/2013

Look. If you find a decent actress under the age of 16, I'd be more than happy to play her father.

by Anonymousreply 4610/13/2013

Peter Dinklage is considering the role.

by Anonymousreply 4710/14/2013

Lourdes Leon

by Anonymousreply 4810/14/2013

I happen to know of a fantastic female director who I'm sure can free up some time to direct such an important picture.

by Anonymousreply 4910/14/2013

Hey, no problem. We're working on the screenplay. Almost finished with it. We won't need to do any location scouting because well, been there, done that.

And best of all, we've made some minor changes, just tweaked the character a little, and Jeremy Renner has agreed to play Malala.

Jessica Chastain is going to play the guy who tracks down the shooter and "smokes him." I see an Oscar in this for Renner. I really do. It will showcase his range. Awesome.

Right now, we are doing a talent search for a photogenic brain surgeon, because we want to get this right. He needs to have a British accent or fake it authentically.

by Anonymousreply 5010/14/2013

meredith baxter birney, for the lifetime movie of the week version.

by Anonymousreply 5110/14/2013

I'm just a few years older, but with the right lighting and filters I could easily play a 16 year-old.

by Anonymousreply 5210/14/2013

Gabourey Sidebe already said it was the best new movie role she's been offiered in a while

by Anonymousreply 5310/14/2013

News from Hollywood says that Johnny Depp is the top choice.

by Anonymousreply 5410/14/2013

Perhaps it could have a dance number after the shooting?

by Anonymousreply 5510/14/2013

Not Without My Granddaughter!

by Anonymousreply 5610/14/2013

Can Allan Carr produce?

by Anonymousreply 5710/14/2013

"I've just been cast in the BET Cable version called "Dere's a Bullet in Mah Head!!"

by Anonymousreply 5810/14/2013

How do you solve a problem like Malala?

by Anonymousreply 5910/14/2013

I'll do it if I don't have to wear that stupid head scarf. Girl's gotta whip her hair, amiright?

by Anonymousreply 6010/14/2013

I think it will be a sitcom - "Not Without Malala!"

Malala works as a temp for an employment agency, and in each episode, she has a different job - a guard at a mosh pit, an assistant to a fashion designer, a wedding photographer.

"Lots of laughs in this one as Malala is hired to fill in as the receptionist at a brothel. Madame Cherry: Queen Latifah "

by Anonymousreply 6110/14/2013

Eddie Murphy

by Anonymousreply 6210/14/2013

Hailee Steinfeld. Seriously.

by Anonymousreply 6310/14/2013

If Lola Falana adopted Malala...she'd be Malala Falana

by Anonymousreply 6410/15/2013

If Milli Vanilli and Liza Minnelli adopted Malala, she'd be Malala Vanilli Minnelli.

by Anonymousreply 6510/15/2013

I think I can clear my schedule for this one...

by Anonymousreply 6610/15/2013

R65. You funny bitch.

by Anonymousreply 6710/15/2013

A toss-up between two serious young actresses: Selena Gomez and Vanessa Hudgens.

by Anonymousreply 6810/15/2013

I was born to play this role. Call me, Harvey!

by Anonymousreply 6910/15/2013

Kate Middleton is looking for something to do.

by Anonymousreply 7010/15/2013

I though r65 was funny too!

by Anonymousreply 7110/15/2013

I think Malala is the name of one of my beautiful daughters.

by Anonymousreply 7210/15/2013

I think r64 is funnier.

by Anonymousreply 7310/15/2013

I nominate Jackée Harry.

by Anonymousreply 7410/15/2013

James Brolin could use the work.

by Anonymousreply 7510/15/2013

Madonna should adopt her!

by Anonymousreply 7610/15/2013

Ageless stage and recording star Lea Salonga has been tapped to portray inspirational Pakistani student and education activist, Malala Yousafzai, in Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber's latest venture, "I Am Malala: The Musical." Described by an insider as a "pop-rock opera with a tinge of Bollywood," the exciting new musical will feature original works by the celebrated composer and his "Bombay Dreams" collaborator, lyricist A. R. Rahman. The source reveals that many of the arrangements are destined to become instant classics, such as the rousing showstopper "Hello, Mingora!", the anthemic "Take a Stand Against the Taliban," the inspirational "They Shot Me in the Head, But They Didn't Kill My Spirit," and the heartbreaking ballad "Who Will Teach the Children?" Other numbers on the preliminary song list include "Hello Karachi! (Goodbye, Mingora) (Reprise), "Another Schoolgirl in Another Classroom (The Imam's Lament)," "She is Surprisingly Wise, That Girl," "Take That Hijab Off Your Head (Malala in France)," "You Speak Urdu, I Speak Pashto," and "From The Daily Show to the White House (Malala's Whirlwind Book Tour)."

by Anonymousreply 7710/15/2013

If not me, then one of my assorted children!

by Anonymousreply 7810/15/2013

Is there a drag queen named Malaria by any chance?

by Anonymousreply 7910/15/2013

Danny Devito I love your work!

by Anonymousreply 8010/15/2013

Halle Berry

by Anonymousreply 8110/16/2013

[all posts by racist flame bait troll removed, ISP notified with full text of all posts.]

by Anonymousreply 8210/16/2013

Ugly Betty's nephew, the one with 'gay sensibilities'.

by Anonymousreply 8310/16/2013
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