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If Gravity was made with Joan Crawford and Bette Davis instead of George C and Sandy B, how would it have played out?

And how would it have ended?

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 1010/13/2013

Forget about a safe return to earth. The bitchslapping and shadethrowing between the two would have provided enough thrust to push the space station at warp speed to Antares.

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 110/12/2013

Bette would have served freeze-dried rat to Joan.

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 210/12/2013

It would be re-titled:

INVASION OF THE RED WEIRD-OS

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 310/12/2013

The action would have been pretty much nil, since those two have been dead for decades.

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 410/12/2013

Bette Davis's character would've grabbed on to Joan's character's jet pack while kicking in her face mask. After her rival for oxygen was taken care of, she would've proceeded to make her way back to earth...without a second thought about her former colleague.

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 510/12/2013

It would have been called CUNTS IN SPACE.

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 610/13/2013

Bette would sing Defying Gravity while ripping the face tape off of Joan. Joan's spacesuit would have shoulder pads and a cinched waist. Davis would declare the universe a dump.

They would agree on voldka and Pepsi.

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 710/13/2013

Helga, when you polish the satellite you have to MOVE the engines!

If you can't do something right then don't do it at all!

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 810/13/2013

Imagine a serious bitchslap in a zero-gravity environment!

Your enemy doesn't just fall down, she goes spinning out of orbit and falls into the sun.

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 910/13/2013

"Might as well have 'property of NASA' tattooed on my backside!"

by Carol Ann, still dustingreply 1010/13/2013
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