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'Real Housewife' Melissa Gorga's New Book Advocates Marital Rape

Excerpts from the book:

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Men, I know you think your woman isn't the type who wants to be taken. But trust me, she is. Every girl wants to get her hair pulled once in a while. If your wife says "no," turn her around, and rip her clothes off. She wants to be dominated.

Women don't realize how easy men are. Just give us what we want.

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In the beginning, Joe wanted to have sex every single day, at least once, if not twice or three times…If I didn't give it to him once a day, he'd get upset.

I can do something that pisses him off on a Monday, but if we had sex on Sunday night, it blows over more easily. But if we haven't done it for two days and I give him attitude? It could be a huge fight.

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In the beginning, Joe wanted to have sex every single day, at least once, if not twice or three times…If I didn't give it to him once a day, he'd get upset.

I can do something that pisses him off on a Monday, but if we had sex on Sunday night, it blows over more easily. But if we haven't done it for two days and I give him attitude? It could be a huge fight.

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Happy guys let more go. Issues get brushed off. Quickies count. Say what you want, but it's the truth.

[A] woman needs to keep herself in shape. She has to be seductive. She must be willing to try new things for her husband's pleasure and her own. And, most important, she has to be available for sex.

There's real passionate sex and maintenance sex. You need them both for a healthy marriage. Maintenance sex keeps the wheels greased, the lines of communication open, and the fights to a minimum.

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Even when I'm exhausted and not really in the mood, if it means a lot to Joe that we connect physically, I'll say, "I'm not so into it tonight, but let's go."

If it's a hard "no," I try to be nice about it. Don't swat him away, or say with a tone, "Leave me alone!" Eventually he will leave you alone at more than you wish he would.

Refusing to initiate is a Top Three reason men cheat. The ugliest girl in the world could come on to a man in that state of mind, and he might have to go for it. He thinks, At least someone wants me.

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The way I see it, if a wife is a puttana, her husband will never feel the urge to go outside the marriage to actual whores, or strip clubs. He won't hit on women in bars, or drool over his friend's girlfriends or the secretary. He'll rush home to his wife, who makes sure he'll have a good time (the best time) in the comfort of his own home.

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His style was to make corrections and to teach me from the beginning days of our marriage exactly how he envisioned our life together. Joe always says, "You got to teach someone to walk straight on the knife. If you slip, you're going to get cut." Even if something didn't bother him that badly, he'd bring it up. He wanted to make sure that I knew, for example, if I ran out to CVS and he came home from work to an empty house, he didn't like it. He'd call me and say, "I don't care if you're out all day long. But I don't want to come home to an empty house."

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To be on the same level, everyone has to get off the high horse. I don't care if the woman makes more money than the man, if he's a janitor and she's the president. After a fourteen-hour workday, if a man comes home and there's no dinner on the table, and his wife is on the phone, watching TV, or on the computer ignoring him, he won't feel respected.

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by Anonymousreply 6909/26/2013

Man, Adam Levine looks hot lately. Anyone see him on the voice last night?

by Anonymousreply 109/24/2013

More:

His thoughts on childcare:

I don't feed babies, or change the diapers. My father never wiped my ass, and I don't wipe my babies' either.

On double standards, parenting, and some more of his weird sex shit:

My sons can have a separate entrance to the house. They can come and go as they wish. They can have anyone up to their room. I don't care. But I want to keep my Antonia my little girl.

My wish is for her to have on boyfriend for a very long time. They have a mutual breakup with no bad feelings. Then she marries the next guy. That would be ideal. I don't want her to ever have her heart broken. The only way I can see to helping her romantic life work out that way is be really strict and overprotective about who she sees, when she goes out, and what she does.

I know it's a double standard but I just don't care! I don't see it so much as restricting Antonia, but as protecting her.

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The routine of making dinner and keeping a clean house is how I stay grounded. It keeps me humble.

Someone might look at Joe and think, "Chauvinist pig." He sounds like one sometimes! They might look at me and think, "Throwback." The way I see it, Joe is cleaning up messes at work all day long—things you can't wipe up with a sponge. That's his job. It's my job to clean up spilled milk. I just do it. There is simply no point to arguing about something that requires all of five seconds of my time and next to zero energy.

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When gender roles are confused, sexual roles are, too. If he's at the sink and then changing diapers, then who throws down in the bed? In our marriage, Joe is always the man, doing masculine things. I'm the woman, and I do the female things, including housework.

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Girls don't poop. Me, never have. Never will. It just doesn't happen. Or, that's what Joe things! We've been married for nine years, and he has never once seen or smelled my business. How have I pulled this off? I don't do it when he's around or awake. In an emergency, I have my ways of pooping so he won't hear, smell, or see. It's a challenge.

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[M]y first rule of fashion is a gimme: DRESS TO PLEASE YOUR MAN

[T]he one thing I've come to realize is that I need to take Joe into account when I get dressed.

I always wear what I want and what I like, but I also aspire to be eye candy for my husband.

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This is one street that doesn't go both ways. If you notice, Joe never wears a wedding band. Joe has really chubby fingers (he will tell you so, too), and he thinks that a ring is the most uncomfortable thing ever. It used to bother me, but now I just tell myself that a wedding band is more of a chick magnet, kind of like a guy walking a cute dog or pushing a stroller.

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Listen, we all love to hang out with our single friends. Who's more fun? But, let's call a spade a spade. You can't make a habit of it when you are married. It's always better for your relationship to go out with people who have more in common with you. You are less likely to get yourself in trouble…[T]oo many…"Girls' Nights" with the single ladies can only lead to temptation.

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Back in our early years, we'd go to the bar, and I'd make the rounds and talk to everyone. When we got home, Joe would say, "I feel like we didn't hang out. Like you talked to everyone else more." Now, you might think, "Why is he so needy?" He's not. Joe doesn't need me to hold his hand at a party. It's about respect and loyalty…We arrive together. We stay near each other. We leave together.

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Honesty can be flattering or instructive. It can also be brutal. When a man asks his wife to dress better or lose a few pounds, it can seem rude. I don't take comments like that as insults. Honesty is always a compliment. When Joe speaks his truth, he's giving me credit that I'm secure enough in myself to take constructive criticism.

by Anonymousreply 209/24/2013

Adam Levine is always fucking scorching hot.

by Anonymousreply 309/24/2013

Did she use the same ghostwriter as Brandi?

by Anonymousreply 409/24/2013

Prostitution Whore!

by Anonymousreply 509/24/2013

Useless twats, the both of them.

by Anonymousreply 609/24/2013

Divorced in two years.

by Anonymousreply 709/24/2013

I read constant discussions about Joe being gay and hooking up with guys at the gym, etc. Any chapters on my husband spending ample time at the gym?

by Anonymousreply 809/24/2013

Sounds like the ingrediences of a bad marriage.

by Anonymousreply 909/24/2013

I love reading the bad reviews on Amazon although the five star reviews are just as funny.

by Anonymousreply 1009/24/2013

Why the fuck do you post this Frau shit?

WE DON'T CARE.

by Anonymousreply 1109/24/2013

the real housewives and husbands of New Jersey are simply sub-humans.

No way should a hetero male expect sex every night if his wife is not into it. Marriage is a 2-way deal. I hate when fathers say they won't help take care of the kids-you wanted them and helped make them-now change a damn diaper, bitch. That old world old school "men are hands off" schtick is so 1950s.

by Anonymousreply 1209/24/2013

Hell, if I were married to Joe Gorga, he could take me whenever and however he wanted. My pussy would be OFB 24/7.

by Anonymousreply 1309/24/2013

[quote]There is simply no point to arguing about something that requires all of five seconds of my time and next to zero energy.

Agree with this.

by Anonymousreply 1409/24/2013

Marriage whore.

by Anonymousreply 1509/24/2013

[quote] I have my ways of pooping so he won't hear, smell, or see. It's a challenge.

"Mah! Some broad's shitting in the birdbath again!"

by Anonymousreply 1609/24/2013

What does Adam Levine have to do with Melissa Gorga?

by Anonymousreply 1709/24/2013

[quote] His thoughts on childcare: I don't feed babies, or change the diapers. My father never wiped my ass, and I don't wipe my babies' either.

Considering both of them are mongs, no one would trust either of them near a baby

by Anonymousreply 1809/24/2013

What's really sad is that Melissa will have book signings at stores and loads of other Jersey Bimbos will line up to buy this shit

by Anonymousreply 1909/24/2013

[QUOTE]No way should a hetero male expect sex every night if his wife is not into it.

That's what mistresses are for. Not only does the wife have to take care of the kids, but let's face it, her vaginas a little loose at this point.

by Anonymousreply 2109/24/2013

Yes but can she cook?

by Anonymousreply 2209/24/2013

One wonders if she's going to crap when she's 50 and Joe is fucking some 22 year old.

by Anonymousreply 2309/24/2013

She's delusional if she thinks regular sex with the ole ball and chain is going to keep that slab of meat from straying. Men don't cheat because they want something better/more. They cheat because they want something DIFFERENT. Conquest. The thrill of the hunt. Boredom. That's why men stray. Three kids and a lot of years with the same tired ass, he's cheating on this bitch for sure.

by Anonymousreply 2409/24/2013

[quote]Every girl wants

I hate this type of person.

"Because I like something, and naturally the universe revolves around me, EVERY woman also likes that and must be lying if they say they don't".

by Anonymousreply 2509/24/2013

Open them legs,bitch. You know you want this big dick up in your twat.

by Anonymousreply 2609/24/2013

I bet Andy would love at least 3 of Joe's fat fingers up his hole.

by Anonymousreply 2709/24/2013

As a straight woman I must say this is true:

"I can do something that pisses him off on a Monday, but if we had sex on Sunday night, it blows over more easily. But if we haven't done it for two days and I give him attitude? It could be a huge fight."

Women who are withholding sex to punish their man are doing it all wrong.

by Anonymousreply 2809/24/2013

This made me think of that book written a little while back by an ex "feminist" who took up with some guy in Wyoming or Montana. Turns out he escalated to beating her up

by Anonymousreply 2909/24/2013

This woman is an example of what happens when profound stupidity and illiteracy converge in a restrictive, latently violent patriarchal environment. Women are taught that their worth is conditioned by the Madonna/whore paradigm, and assume that being forced to reduce themselves to the roles of sex objects and virtuous mothers, makes them somewhat worthy in the eyes of the men around them. They are wrong.

Melissa Gorga is a fucking imbecile at all levels, but the fact that she is basically glorifying this shit, makes her all the more disgusting. What a MASSIVE idiot.

by Anonymousreply 3009/24/2013

This is hilarious. I am Italian and agree that girls and boys should dress to please me. I believe in hair pulling, clothes ripping and fucking my property like a rag doll, whenever I want. My cum is sweet and you're lucky to get it. My dick is king and king size. The bitch gotta want it. NO one will look on you with as much desire as I do if you're my boy. I will make sure you're satisfied whether you want it or not.

My contribution is I look good - handsome with muscles, sexy ass, big dick, deep commanding voice and I cry over music and my mother. I know my bitch boy needs to shit, but he needs to close the door and come out clean and ready to ride. I would do damage to anyone who disrepects him.

Underwear and grooming are important, looking and sweet and sexy and smooth is more fun to wreck and dirty up. I will piss on him, but I will eat and fuck and bite and pound him to heaven. Take it or leave it. My boy takes it all and it gives him a satisfied sheen. He looks well loved and fucked right.

If he messes up, then I deal with it. It gets a bit rough. There is no doubt who is on top or who's the boss. He holds a lot of power with his lips and ass and sweet intelligent ways, but he knows what they are for. I taught my whore how to be happy by pleasing me. Italians are pretty sweet after the pillage. I put him on a pedestal and knock him off whenever I want. He cleans up after.

by Anonymousreply 3109/24/2013

R16 I couldn't stop laughing, my side hurts. R-nineteen, you are so right. You can almost hear the conversations about this senseless book taking place.

by Anonymousreply 3209/24/2013

Dominatrix WHORE!

by Anonymousreply 3309/24/2013

Would that apply to gay marital rape?

by Anonymousreply 3409/24/2013

is it rape rape?

by Anonymousreply 3509/24/2013

Do Melissa's rules apply to Joey Simpson when his mussy gets torn apart by Joe Gorga?

by Anonymousreply 3609/24/2013

When this bitch is menopausal she'll be in for a rude awakening. If he even still wants her then, she will have to take some acting classes. Most women at that age don't want anything to do with sex anymore. It's torture.

by Anonymousreply 3709/24/2013

R30 perfectly stated. thank you.

by Anonymousreply 3809/24/2013

first person to write a book without ever having actually read one

by Anonymousreply 3909/24/2013

We had a famliy friend who was a therapist and we talking about people who have addiction problems. He said many people don't realize that the constant need to have sex all of the time is not normal and that person has a serious addiction problem. I agree with that because, sorry but Joe is sick and so is Melissa. What disturbs me the most is that this dysfunctional behavior is being told to millions of women that this is normal when it's sick and it victimizes women big time! I think Melissa is sick and has really low self esteem.

The only thing I agree with what she said is when one person is home, and the other person has a job outside of the home, that person who is home should basically maintain the home which I think is fair.

However, when she said that Joe won't change the dippers and clean after the babies, that is completely BS. My father helped my mother with my older brother and sister when they were babies in the 50s and he worked too. He was a very loving father too. Both of my parents worked ,and when there was cleaning that needed to be done, my father and mother both cleaned together. If something needed to be done around the house and if my dad saw it needed to be done, he would jump to it and clean the mess. The same with my mother.

I agree with Melissa about passing gas. It is rude and obnoxious to pass gas around anyone,and both my parents never did that around each other nor around me and my brother and sister. My parents thought it was extremely crass and totally unnecessary because they felt you can control yourself.Both of my parents said if you need to use the bathroom, then use the bathroom. Don't hold it in.

Over all it angers me Melissa generalizes people in her book.Obviously they have sick problems and she is delusional to think this is the norm and everyone else strives to be this way. I used to like Melissa ,but I don't like her anymore.

by Anonymousreply 4009/24/2013

She's cuban and italian. explains a lot.

by Anonymousreply 4109/25/2013

"The way I see it, if a wife is a puttana, her husband will never feel the urge to go outside the marriage to actual whores, or strip clubs. He won't hit on women in bars, or drool over his friend's girlfriends or the secretary. "

Keep telling yourself that, honey. Maybe there are times you can actually make yourself believe that your horny, self-centered husband doesn't take your snatch for granted, and isn't out chasing young tail while you wipe up baby poop.

Seriously, no man that serious about the Madonna/whore paradigm is happy with just one woman. If he's got a Madonna at home, he wants a whore. And if he's got a whore at home, he doesn't respect her enough to be faithful.

by Anonymousreply 4209/25/2013

[quote]She's delusional if she thinks regular sex with the ole ball and chain is going to keep that slab of meat from straying. Men don't cheat because they want something better/more. They cheat because they want something DIFFERENT. Conquest. The thrill of the hunt. Boredom. That's why men stray. Three kids and a lot of years with the same tired ass, he's cheating on this bitch for sure.

You're delusional if you believe she actually does and believes this shit and that she doesn't know her husband gets down with other men, mainly her brothers-in-law, Juicy Joe and her sister's husband.

by Anonymousreply 4309/25/2013

[quote]first person to write a book without ever having actually read one

Excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me. I don't think so. Bitch, get your factses straight.

by Anonymousreply 4409/25/2013

Joe cheats. So does Giudice.

by Anonymousreply 4509/25/2013

I feel deep down that Gorga got it on with Albie's bf Greggie.

by Anonymousreply 4609/25/2013

Women are idiots. You just know they'll be lining up to buy this dumb whore's book and getting her to sign it.

Dumb cu-nts.

by Anonymousreply 4709/25/2013

Fortunately, women don't buy this shit from Melissa. If they did, there would be less men on the market.

by Anonymousreply 4809/25/2013

Please, R47, like a fair amount of gay guys won't be there to meet a "celebrity" and take a picture to post on Facebook.

by Anonymousreply 4909/25/2013

All of that is complete bull.She looks disgusted by her husband. No way they are having sex that often. Melissa wears the pants in that relationship. And if by some weird chance what she wrote is true, she will leave him as soon as a better catch comes along. Being a sex slave and a maid does not make for a good relationship. She didn't describe anything that sounded like a partnership.

by Anonymousreply 5009/25/2013

None of the couples on RHONJ look remotely happy. You think Big Al still gets it up for Mama Soprano?

by Anonymousreply 5109/25/2013

If I had to live in a marriage like that one day I'd go postal and kill him in his sleep.

by Anonymousreply 5209/25/2013

BTW, why do people on DL keep saying Albie is gay? Where is the proof? I don't get that vibe. Also, where is the proof that Joe Gorga is bisexual?

by Anonymousreply 5309/25/2013

Frau alert at r53.

by Anonymousreply 5409/25/2013

R54, ASSHOLE ALERT!!

by Anonymousreply 5509/25/2013

Hmm. a woman likes her hair pulled and bottom slapped. And although no one talks about this, a lady likes an alpha male in the bedroom. If a lady is not satisfying her man sexually, then he will wander- consider the success of Ashley Madison..

So, some of the things that she says are true.

But I do think men can change diapers and don't agree w/the madonna/whore stuff.

by Anonymousreply 5609/25/2013

A woman wants a dominant male when she's at her most fertile, because these alpha guys are perceived as having superior genetics.

by Anonymousreply 5709/25/2013

As an alpha male, Joe does not have much to offer in the way of genetics.

by Anonymousreply 5809/25/2013

I wasn't talking about IQ/brains, r58. Judging from his physical appearance and sex drive, Gorga probably has very high testosterone levels, and studies have shown that these are the types of guys women sexually crave most when they're at their most fertile.

by Anonymousreply 5909/25/2013

Reminds me of that line in "54", when the club owner was asking Ryan Phillippe's character about his marriage:

"What are you trying to prove?"

That ugly husband of hers (he has "Sloth-face") is ALWAYS going on about how hot she looks, how horny he is for her, does she want some Tarzan (his cock), etc... That's just not how NORMAL married men act around their wives unless they are deeply conflicted and concerned about being perceived as queer. Then, on the flip side - the guy LOVES gay bars and even stripped for the swooning patrons at one in one episode I remember. He's always flashing his cock around to men when he's drunk. I mean, come on - where there is smoke there is fire. I'm not saying someone has to be all homophobic and neanderthalish, but stripping for a bunch of gay men in a gay bar???? Maybe I'm way off base here, but I don't see 99.99999999% of straight men doing something like that. He def. likes the bone.

by Anonymousreply 6009/25/2013

Joe Gorga and his wife are quite open about their bisexuality. See link:

by Anonymousreply 6109/25/2013

Quite a link, R61.

by Anonymousreply 6209/25/2013

Sloths' are cute and cuddly though I won't recommend offering them one. He's not unattractive just not my type of guy that I want hanging around.

by Anonymousreply 6309/26/2013

[quote]So, some of the things that she says are true.

No means yes - excellent thing rationalize.

[quote]He's not unattractive just not my type of guy that I want hanging around.

He's a spoiled man child who needs to grow the fuck up.

by Anonymousreply 6409/26/2013

Who cares what these mongoloids do?

by Anonymousreply 6509/26/2013

Bitch is ripping me off!

by Anonymousreply 6609/26/2013

Looked her up. Not surprised. Typical facia bruta advice. This is her option for playing it and the scores of other face-challenged fugs out there. It's differ'nt for them.

by Anonymousreply 6709/26/2013

R59, that primal urge is just an evolutionary adaptation left over from our very distant past. Back in caveman times women needed strong men to provide and protect. Not anymore. Now you need a smart, successful, rich man to do that. A muscle bound guido might have potent sperm, but he's useless for providing security.

by Anonymousreply 6809/26/2013

I'm guessing any man who would either read this idiot's book, or knows a woman who has and furiously takes notes as she passes on these pearl of wisdom to him - is probably already into rape.

by Anonymousreply 6909/26/2013
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