Serving up this steaming pile of
Celebrity Gossip
Gay Politics
Gay News
and Pointless Bitchery
Since 1995

A Helpful Hints Thread

In this thread lets share some helpful hints that have worked for you and you'd like to share with others.

For example, don't buy expensive stainless steel cleaner, use white vinegar instead.

But don't limit the hints to just cleaning. If you know how to get a free room upgrade or a better seat on the plane or a trick for proper comma usage. Share it all here.

by Anonymousreply 5211/22/2013

Put urine in your humidifier to quickly get rid of a cold.

by Anonymousreply 109/07/2013

Keep a spray bottle full of a 50-50 combination of white vinegar and distilled water (yes, distilled, not purified or spring waer) for use in cleaning LCD tvs. Spray the solution on a lint-free cloth and with the tv off, use the cloth in a circular manner on the screen. Let dry.

by Anonymousreply 209/07/2013

Let's eat grandma.

Let's eat, Grandma.

by Anonymousreply 309/07/2013

A visual guide to the serial comma:

by Anonymousreply 409/07/2013

Instead of wasting money on condoms, buy those long narrow sleeves of peanuts or cashews. Not only will the sleeve serve as a cock wrapper, but the nuts will give you the energy to perform.

by Anonymousreply 509/07/2013

Every time you use nature's Free Solar Laundry Dryer to dry a load of your laundry, you save between 30¢ and 50¢ depending on your local electric rates.

It adds up in a year's time.

For Homeowners: The cost of nighttime heating and cooling can be greatly reduced by only heating or cooling your bedroom. This allows you turn off the HVAC in the rest of your house. Big savings, especially with a programmable thermostat to automatically restart the HVAC when you get up.

by Anonymousreply 609/07/2013

TO REMOVE RED WINE STAINS FROM A PAINTED WALL: Mix equal parts bleach & water in glass dish (I used 1/3 cup of each). Dampen a clean cotton rag/towel with the solution and wipe the stain. Let dry. The red wine should be gone.

by Anonymousreply 709/07/2013

You can never have enough hats, gloves and shoes.

Yeah, cheers: thanks a lot.

by Anonymousreply 809/07/2013

Man, what's going on at your house R7?

by Anonymousreply 909/07/2013

You can quickly fashion a handy garrote with just a broken paint brush handle and a length of wire.

by Anonymousreply 1009/07/2013

Weed is good for sex

by Anonymousreply 1109/07/2013

Never let your people talk you into a musical based on fairy tales and directed by Rob Marshall.

by Anonymousreply 1209/07/2013

R8, Darling, even Amanda de Cadenet would remember the word "accessories".

by Anonymousreply 1309/07/2013

Nothing fully gets rid of cat puke stains.

by Anonymousreply 1409/07/2013

R5, it's more economical just to use the plastic bags that they hand out for umbrellas at Bloomingdale's on rainy days.

by Anonymousreply 1509/07/2013

Put PLENTY of slippery drippings on all kitchen door handles, window catches and that princess phone in the counter. Now, as instructed, light the grease fire and die.

by Anonymousreply 1609/07/2013

Wit and Wisdom for R16!

by Anonymousreply 1709/07/2013

Eating thin people's doodie makes YOU thin!

by Anonymousreply 1809/07/2013

They work just fine in a pinch, R15, but they don't come with a handy snack.

by Anonymousreply 1909/07/2013

R5/ R19, one thing that they do not do is pinch. Unless you leave the umbrella in them.

by Anonymousreply 2009/07/2013

Always ask for at least one other picture before choosing a trick. You can't really tell what someone looks like from just the first one!

by Anonymousreply 2109/07/2013

If the whore falls on love with you, free sex for life!

by Anonymousreply 2209/07/2013

R18, you must get it put into your colon via anus. Ingesting through the mouth will just make you sick. Geez, get your fecal implant info right. :)

by Anonymousreply 2309/07/2013

Always rent the cheapest car model possible. In many locations, they run out and force you into an upgrade. Complain, because you had a contracted car available to you. Then when they give you the crappy minivan, complain that this is your Hawaiian vacation and:

1/ you don't want to drive a mommy car on vacation, and 2/ you agreed to the gas MPG that came with a compact.

Change-o, presto! Free upgrade to convertible for your Hawaiian trip.

by Anonymousreply 2409/07/2013

Be careful of wigs.

by Anonymousreply 2509/07/2013

Never toss a severed slice of human skull into the trash! A little soap and elbrow grease will turn that bone China into a handsome candy dish for all to enjoy!

by Anonymousreply 2609/07/2013

Never switch lanes in front of a truck when approaching a red light because sometimes trucks have terrible brakes.

Never back up more than you need to.

Don't park near stray shopping carts.

If you have a plug in GPS, don't leave it on all the time when not in use or it will drain your battery.

by Anonymousreply 2709/07/2013

23, fecal transplants can be through a tube straight to the stomach. The goals is to bathe the entire digestive system with ideal flora...or so I've heard.

by Anonymousreply 2809/07/2013

Clearly a great time, R9.

I want to be invited to R7's house.

by Anonymousreply 2909/07/2013

Homemade eyeglass cleaner : 1 part rubbing alcohol : 1 part distilled water.

Works great!

by Anonymousreply 3009/07/2013

Everyone has parasites and must go through difficult protocols over the space of several months to rid themselves of them. You might have to strain and take pictures of the stones you poop out too, to add to the cache at

by Anonymousreply 3109/07/2013

R30, and that's easier than two squirts of Windex? I can see you don't understand the thrust of this thread.

by Anonymousreply 3209/08/2013

r28 Fauna and Merryweather can't get in on this?

by Anonymousreply 3309/08/2013

There's some good stuff listed in this thread.

by Anonymousreply 3409/08/2013

Too many people trying too hard here.

by Anonymousreply 3509/08/2013

"Now, if you want to tidy up in a hurry, think of your living room as a big clock. Start at midnight, and then go around the room working clockwise toward the kitchen. You'll be done in two shakes of a lamb's tail."

by Anonymousreply 3609/08/2013

Always masturbate before picking up a whore. Never give her the easy one. Make her work for that money.

by Anonymousreply 3709/08/2013

Always place your pants (with your wallet inside the pocket) as far from the bed as possible. This keeps the whore you're fucking from taking your bank-roll.

by Anonymousreply 3809/08/2013

Always show up to a whore house with a filthy cock. The whore will always spend a lot of time getting it clean with warm soapy water and it feels great. Really, it's like getting free head.

by Anonymousreply 3909/08/2013


Show up to the whore house wired on speed. No Nevada whore is allowed to fuck you with a disease. The whore will give you a little hand job looking for pre-ejaculate (means healthy). When wired on speed, you don't make the pre-ejaculate! You just got yourself a professional hand job from a whore for free!

by Anonymousreply 4009/08/2013


If all you want is great head, just look for the biggest fattest juiciest lips. Nothing else matters much.

by Anonymousreply 4109/08/2013

Never bombard a message board with unfunny posts where you pretend to be Jimmy Swaggert.

by Anonymousreply 4209/08/2013

WEHT Jimmy Swaggart?

by Anonymousreply 4309/08/2013

Learn how to spell a name you just fucking read and I'll think about it. Stupid shit.

by Anonymousreply 4409/08/2013

If you need to remove a nacreous layer of permacum, have a couple of shots of vodka and lie down until you realize that a nacreous layer of permacum is the result of years of collective effort and should be preserved.

by Anonymousreply 4509/08/2013

Do Americans use the term that something 'will do in a pinch'?

by Anonymousreply 4609/08/2013

Yes r46 , it is a universal idiom. Did something just fly over my head?

by Anonymousreply 4709/08/2013

Dryer sheets work like a magic eraser to clean stuff.

Use sulfate free shampoo if you want your hair shiny and healthy.

by Anonymousreply 4809/08/2013

Usually TVs are factory set to have a very bright screen as this looks better in the store. Reset the brightness to about half of the factory setting, it is literally easier on the eyes and saves a surprising amount of money - the extra power required for store-bright screens mounts up over time.

When boiling eggs keep the water for watering houseplants, it's full of minerals.

Always buy large ticket items just before the end of the month, the sales people have targets to meet and will give much better deals to make their figures.

Never play cards with a man named Doc.

Never trust a dog with orange eyebrows.

by Anonymousreply 4909/08/2013

An ounce of ketchup in your lady ham can be of service at the strangest hour.

by Anonymousreply 5009/08/2013

Next time your tummy acts up, and your Hershey Highway turns into a Raging Rapids, save a swatch of the TP that you wiped with. You can discreetly rub it on the doorknob of that neighbor in the apartment next door that just drives you crazy! It's a little way of turning lemons into lemonade... make those intestinal bacteria that got you sick into the gift that keeps on giving!

by Anonymousreply 5109/08/2013

Never stick your dick in crazy.

by Anonymousreply 5211/22/2013
Need more help? Click Here.

Follow theDL catch up on what you missed

recent threads by topic delivered to your email

follow popular threads on twitter

follow us on facebook

Become a contributor - post when you want with no ads!