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My ex-boyfriend gets married tomorrow to a Republican congressman's daughter

I wasn't invited.

by Anonymousreply 6108/29/2013

Ugh. Well, aren't you glad you dodged that?

by Anonymousreply 108/25/2013

Tell him I can at least get him comfortable with being in a twin bed in the same room with his wife.

by Anonymousreply 208/25/2013

Does she and her family know? If not, show up uninvited. Endless fun will follow. If they do know, then fuck him at the reception. Like she cares anyhow.

by Anonymousreply 308/25/2013

she sort of knows r3 (they prayed the gay away)

by Anonymousreply 408/25/2013

State or Federal?

by Anonymousreply 508/25/2013

headshake.

that must be bizarre for you to witness.

by Anonymousreply 608/25/2013

married on a monday?

by Anonymousreply 708/25/2013

Though it wouldn't be right to crash the reception, if the wedding is in a church, there's nothing to stop you from going in to watch the ceremony --- and making sure he sees you about halfway through the wedding.

by Anonymousreply 808/25/2013

r8, you should have advised him to have a horse ready outside the church in case they made eye contact and the groom bolted.

by Anonymousreply 908/25/2013

Crash the wedding and make a scene! Tear off your shirt and shriek that you still love him, in front of all the Evil Republicans and their minions!

You know you want to, OP.

by Anonymousreply 1008/25/2013

Just get a gift. Imagine his joy when he opens a beautifully wrapped box of used jockstraps and gay porn DVDs.

by Anonymousreply 1108/25/2013

It shoulda been you

by Anonymousreply 1208/25/2013

I see we're all assuming OP is a male ... which is probably true, but still.

by Anonymousreply 1308/25/2013

It could be worse-- he could be marrying Anderson Cooper.

by Anonymousreply 1408/25/2013

Pull a Dustin Hoffman at the wedding!

by Anonymousreply 1508/25/2013

I didn't assume, R13, until the post about praying the gay away at R4. That sort of nailed it.

OP should hand the groom a gift-wrapped DVD as the married couple come down the aisle. It could just be an ordinary music CD, but it would be sure to panic the closet case.

by Anonymousreply 1608/25/2013

OP,

Dress as an Native American.

Stand outside the church.

Point to the empty aluminum can you're holding.

Point to the tear rolling down your cheek.

Point to the empty aluminum can you're holding.

Point to the tear rolling down your cheek.

by Anonymousreply 1708/25/2013

Leave them alone. He's your ex.

by Anonymousreply 1808/25/2013

You may be hurting OP but you have to ensure he doesn't sneek back into your life when life returns to normal. He has made a choice. So must you - one that protects you.

In time find someone else who doesn't need whatever fucked up psycho-drama he has chosen for himself.

by Anonymousreply 1908/25/2013

r16, even better if he handed the BRIDE a wrapped DVD case. That would really freak out the groom.

by Anonymousreply 2008/25/2013

[all posts by ham-fisted troll a removed.]

by Anonymousreply 2108/25/2013

Hey, that guy has to live with HIS choices so just watch the karma unfold. He is suffering now. He will suffer in the future with this fake marriage. You are the one in the power seat. So, just get some popcorn.

by Anonymousreply 2208/25/2013

I considered that R16, but she'll have one hand on the groom and the other hand will be holding a big bouquet of flowers. He's the only one with a free hand.

by Anonymousreply 2308/25/2013

Another gay who can't resist the poon! OP is just jealous b/c his ex met a woman with a magic pussy!

by Anonymousreply 2408/25/2013

Lots of humorous responses, OP. But if you do anything, you'll look like a fool and move them closer together not farther apart. You know that, ultimately, he'll regret what he's done.

Go out and live your own life.

by Anonymousreply 2508/25/2013

This thread is useless without OP's gender.

by Anonymousreply 2608/25/2013

So you weren't invited to the wedding ... but were you invited on the honeymoon?

by Anonymousreply 2808/25/2013

OP, was your ex a Rethuglican when you were together? Do you think he is he getting married in order to get a good job? If not, why do you think he's taking on this beard?

by Anonymousreply 2908/25/2013

Pardon me but is your ex-s financee bi too?

by Anonymousreply 3008/25/2013

R29 He never said the ex was a Repub ... just that he's marrying the daughter of one. (The daughter might not even be one.)

by Anonymousreply 3108/25/2013

Photo's, please OP.

The congressman's hometown newspaper will surely do a story the nuptials.

by Anonymousreply 3208/25/2013

Not to change the subject, but didn't Boehner's daughter marry some rasta dude?

by Anonymousreply 3308/25/2013

Why would any straight person marry an ex-gay? Unless you're ok with open relationships or swinging or if you're bisexual yourself, I see no reason.

by Anonymousreply 3408/25/2013

Hmmmm

by Anonymousreply 3508/25/2013

The OP explained it, they "prayed the gay away" R34. Lots of conservative religious types think being gay is just a sinful temptation that a person can (and should) leave that lifestyle.

by Anonymousreply 3608/25/2013

[quote]He never said the ex was a Repub ... just that he's marrying the daughter of one.

I know that. I'm still wondering if he was a Repub when they were together. If no, I'm also wondering if he's now a Repub as a way of getting along with the in-laws. Since he's a closeted gay marrying the daughter of a Repub congressman there is sure to be some interesting undercurrent to the whole affair. You can't trust a Republican to be honest about anything. Passing himself off as an ex-gay already shows that the groom isn't trustworthy. Will he soon be employed in a congressional office? It sounds like a good fit.

by Anonymousreply 3708/25/2013

R37 Maybe Aaron or Lindsay is hiring ...

by Anonymousreply 3808/25/2013

How was the wedding, OP?

by Anonymousreply 3908/26/2013

Give us an update, OP.

by Anonymousreply 4008/26/2013

[all posts by ham-fisted troll a removed.]

by Anonymousreply 4108/26/2013

The wife ditched him for a cabana boy during the honeymoon and the ex and the groom are furiously fucking.

by Anonymousreply 4208/26/2013

OP waited outside the church, when the couple came out and people started throwing rice, he threw a handful of purple glitter on his ex's face, looked at him straight in the eye, lifted his left eyebrow, turned around and sashayed away.

by Anonymousreply 4308/26/2013

r35 - that's pretty funny.

by Anonymousreply 4408/26/2013

White paint "I'M" on the left heel of his shoe and "GAY" on the right one so when he walks up the aisle the whole church knows. My cousins did it on the grooms shoes with "HE. LP!" and the bride's parents were ropeable!

by Anonymousreply 4508/26/2013

You can't pray the gay away, so he'll be back, either to OP or to another fellow.

by Anonymousreply 4608/26/2013

Wow, the facebook photos are up. The poor dear looks terrified.

by Anonymousreply 4708/27/2013

Monday is a strange day for a big wedding unless this was just a couple going to the courthouse.

by Anonymousreply 4808/27/2013

Link please, OP.

by Anonymousreply 4908/27/2013

Great story at R35's link. Sadly, the marriage didn't last. Cute guy.

by Anonymousreply 5008/27/2013

This sounds so retro. It's stunning that this kind of thing still happens.

by Anonymousreply 5108/27/2013

Anybody with proper social skills knows what the appropriate gift is for such an occasion: a black 14" double-headed dildo.

Sheesh, didn't Miss Manners teach you bitches anything?

by Anonymousreply 5208/27/2013

The guy is marrying for money or a good job in her family.

by Anonymousreply 5308/28/2013

[all posts by tedious troll removed.]

by Anonymousreply 5408/28/2013

3/10

by Anonymousreply 5508/28/2013

Two things:

1 - How does the fact that his EX is getting married affect the OP in any way?

2 - Why are we assuming that the ex is gay? He could just as easily be bi. Bisexual men (for a myriad of reasons) usually end up in relationships/marriages with women. This is nothing new.

by Anonymousreply 5608/28/2013

[quote]2 - Why are we assuming that the ex is gay? He could just as easily be bi. Bisexual men (for a myriad of reasons) usually end up in relationships/marriages with women. This is nothing new.

r56, my sides are aching.

by Anonymousreply 5708/28/2013

[quote]How does the fact that his EX is getting married affect the OP in any way?

OP is in a quandary regarding all the x-rated video he has of them when they were together. Should he leak it to the family of the bride? Should he upload it to a porn site? And what about all the still photos?

by Anonymousreply 5808/28/2013

the poor dear is on facebook constantly during his honeymoon

by Anonymousreply 5908/28/2013

There didn't seem to be anything in the news about a posh wedding of a Congressional daughter on Monday.

by Anonymousreply 6008/29/2013

it only looks like he's winning on the outside; inside, he's losing.

by Anonymousreply 6108/29/2013
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