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Why should we care about other people?

Just wondering.

As a gay man, I went through life being stepped on by people who had problems of their own. A lot of women complained about being mistreated by society because of their gender yet they make fun of us and look down on us. It makes me wonder why we should care about women's issues when many of them not only don't care about us, but also hate us.

I have come to the conclusion that we shouldn't care about other people's problems. They have it hard? Well, tough, I guess they'll just have to deal with it. I don't feel the need to expend energy on a matter that does not involve me


by Anonymousreply 4908/25/2013


by Anonymousreply 108/24/2013


by Anonymousreply 208/24/2013

Yeah, that's a great way to go through life.

by Anonymousreply 308/24/2013

OP must be one of those libertarian assholes.

What a fucking sociopath.

Selfish, self-absorbed, narrow-minded, and completely unable to see the bigger picture.

What a shitty way to go through life.

by Anonymousreply 408/24/2013

In some ways I agree, in some ways I don't.

by Anonymousreply 508/24/2013

Because it makes YOU a better person, OP.

No one can change the world, but you can affect you environment. A simple smile, being kind to stranger or being patient with those not as fortunate is a little positive in this huge world of negativity.

by Anonymousreply 608/24/2013

Well said R6.

Being kind doesn't make you a sucker. It makes you a charmer actually.

by Anonymousreply 708/24/2013

Why should we discuss? Why should we care about you?

by Anonymousreply 808/24/2013

Well! I guess OP will be dying alone! Too bad! Where'd I put that candy bar?

by Anonymousreply 908/24/2013

I know that when we are very down, it's difficult to sympathize with others. We are very absorbed in our own misery, we can't deal with other people's issues. I can't go much further when i'm low personally...

However, i think that in better moments we should try and in our best moments we ought to try.

by Anonymousreply 1008/24/2013

OP, you live in NYC, right dear?

by Anonymousreply 1108/24/2013

Well, I do relate to the notion that an awful lot of people are totally absorbed with their own deal and show little interest in others. So, you want to be like that and make more of them?

by Anonymousreply 1208/24/2013

Women are your biggest allies, idiot.

by Anonymousreply 1308/24/2013

I know what you're saying, OP. At times, I agree with you.

Unfortunately, the wimmyn have hijacked your thread. With any luck, they will continue to tell us - at length - what we should feel, what we should think and how we should be conducting our lives.

by Anonymousreply 1408/24/2013

I live in NYC and care deeply about other people r11. I've logged hours delivering meals for God's Love We Deliver, I always help my friends, I'm good to my family and my partner's family. Just because we live on top of each other doesn't make everyone of us assholes.

by Anonymousreply 1508/24/2013

So, OP, what you're saying is the straights shouldn't care about gays, and whites shouldn't care about blacks...?

by Anonymousreply 1608/24/2013

The notion of women being our biggest allies is up there with Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy. One you learn early is a total myth, starting in youth with telling a female friend about a male crush -- and then having her betray that trust immediately, usually by going straight to that male. A story I would wager a huge amount of gay men can relate to.

And it keeps going with time. Every time I hear some female politician berating the gays like that one in San Antonio, I think "It's on, cunt." And, yeah, I do still care about other people in my life but my interest in female issues is nil and void now. You're on your own, bitches.

The divide grows the wiser you get.

by Anonymousreply 1708/24/2013

It's called being practical OP, since we don't have enough votes to win any election without allies who are women and people of color. If you don't get that, you don't get much of anything.

by Anonymousreply 1808/24/2013

United we can destroy the facism that has taken over this nation. Divided the fascism will get us. Divide and conquer is their main, sometimes only, strategy. OP represents Fascist Power.

by Anonymousreply 1908/24/2013

"Many of them not only don't care about us, but also hate us." - OP, do you know this applies to straight men too? Also the black community, male and female. And the right wingers. And the religious fundies of every type. And fucking seagulls for all I know.

Does OP care about men's issues? Black issues? Anyone or anything that isn't OP? These are people that hate us too. Is it OK for hot young straight guys to hate us and commit violent crimes against us so long a they're young and hot?

OP, the women are the group that we have least hatred from. If you can't understand that you are a lost cause and you should hand back your membership card for the Friends of Dorothy Support Group and Coffee Klatch.

by Anonymousreply 2008/24/2013

I am curious about the age of the OP? I suspect they are Millennial as I am seeing this attitude more and more in my dealings with them.

by Anonymousreply 2108/24/2013

Women treat gays like pets and accessories.

by Anonymousreply 2208/24/2013

indeed r22. They also HATE masculine gay men who don't fit the stereotype

by Anonymousreply 2308/24/2013

Hey OP, I have been feeling the same way, I started a thread on it

by Anonymousreply 2408/24/2013

I find it depressing that a significant number of gay men seem to automatically treat women as the enemy when many of both groups are routinely demonised for the exact same traits by society at large. (In this matter, brainwashed religious types don't really count in my book - regardless of their gender they tend to look down on anyone they consider to be an inferior minority by default.

One of my biggest disappointments since discovering DL is the routine misogny which accompanies a lot of threads. As if gay men REALLY have more common cause with straight men who routinely engage in sexist behaviour which targets women online, on the streets and in everyday life.

I'm not denying that some women indulge in homophobic and self-loathingly misogynistic behaviour (and too many of this type are high profile journalists / panellists / commentators for my liking) but I do feel that such stances are often down to the way that feminine qualities are portrayed as weak and unnatural - very often the exact same case with 'queer-bashing'. It's about time that people suffering from oppression of whatever hue stopped looking for reasons to oppress others and started to see the bigger picture IMHO.

by Anonymousreply 2508/24/2013

As a gay woman...I care about you OP. I care about gay men. Don't lump ALL women in please!

Believe it or not, there's a lot of lesbians who love men. We aren't all man-haters.

Not to mention, there's a lot of straight women who love gay men.

by Anonymousreply 2608/24/2013

[quote]I have come to the conclusion that we shouldn't care about other people's problems.

Well, thank god for that because we were all wondering how to think, how to behave, and what to believe. Now you've done the work for us, OP. Great job! *thumbs up*

by Anonymousreply 2708/24/2013

R20 is not a gay man, she should fuck off and die in a grease fire.

R22 and R23 are correct.

No, all the people who are sick of your shit are not millenials, fraucunt at R21. I'm a boomer in my 50's. I've been sick of being treated like your man-sized pomeranian for decades.

Please, ladies, do go on telling us how to be gay men. Without your vaginas to guide us, I don't think we'll be able to manage it.

by Anonymousreply 2808/24/2013

^ doesn't care about anyone because no one could care about him...

by Anonymousreply 2908/24/2013

It depends on the people you show care for. I've been caring towards friends and got treated like shit. Then again, I tried to help a couple I never met get a discount for their group home kids and was treated with respect and gratitude. Coworkers react to a kindness with an aloof "thanks" while letting an elderly person ahead in the checkout line renders kindness in return.

It's hard to determine who will pay it back in kindness and appreciate but those who you know don't deserve it, should kiss ass.

If caring makes you feel good, why not indulge yourself?

by Anonymousreply 3008/24/2013

No, I care about quite a few people, fraucunt @R29, and they care about me.

Unsurprisingly, none of them treat me as if I were their amusing little gay pet. I return the favor by not treating them like idiot fraucunts.

Now do, please, tell us more about how we are supposed to behave, feel and think as gay men. We live to serve you.

by Anonymousreply 3108/24/2013

Um, maybe just because it's the right thing to do?

by Anonymousreply 3208/24/2013

r31 lives in New Jersey, don't you?

by Anonymousreply 3308/24/2013

Sorry to disappoint you and your pal, Chris Christie, I'm in Mendocino.

by Anonymousreply 3408/24/2013

Care about SOME other people and tell OTHERS to fuck off.

by Anonymousreply 3508/24/2013

R31 Bitch, no one hates you because you are gay. People hate you because you are a bitter hateful cunt.

by Anonymousreply 3608/24/2013

OP. It is a mark of maturity and insight to care about others, even if doing so is a crapshoot and sometimes we don't get back what we would like.

Why not try to see the positive in those you know, OP? I know some jerks but I know some wonderful human beings who are delightful, smart and fun to be with -- and modest about their achievements. And I am sure you have those who like you and care about you too, although it may not always feel like it.

Never underestimate your neighbor. We are surrounded by wonderful people.

by Anonymousreply 3708/24/2013

Because they might gift you one day, and you'll have to write a Thank-You note.

by Anonymousreply 3808/24/2013

OP = USA citizen without a doubt.

You lot certainly have a knack for je ne sais pas.

by Anonymousreply 3908/24/2013

There are a lot of fraus in this thread, staunchly defending frau-ism.

Care about whomever and whatever you genuinely care about in your life. It is not required that anyone care about everyone.

by Anonymousreply 4008/24/2013


by Anonymousreply 4108/24/2013

DL likes to complain about Millennials being self-absorbed and yet no one can explain WHY it's important to care about others. HMM..

The thing, there's nothing inherently wrong with being self-absorbed. As long as you're not hurting anyone (and no, I'm not talking about people's wee little feelings), you should focus on whatever the hell you want. In my experience, people who complain about others being self-absorbed would rather have that focus placed on THEM. They don't give a damn about society's ills or the world around anymore than you do. They just want you to be less self-absorbed so that they can absorb you in THEIR dumb shit.

by Anonymousreply 4208/24/2013


And so that they might help you back if you need it or so that you don't piss them off.

by Anonymousreply 4308/24/2013

I don't think it's generally women who we should or should not care about; it's their philosophy/beliefs/religion/attitudes that matter. I've known a lot of women who genuinely cared about me and my life, and it's pretty easy to tell who will and won't, and it's those who care who deserve to be cared for.

For the life of me, what I don't understand is people who don't get that we have to care for those in our peer groups. For instance, anti-choice women who want to deny funding to planned parenthood, not seeing the fact that PP spends 97% of their time and money providing services and care aside and apart from abortion. Or blacks who run around saying that gay rights aren't equivalent to their civil rights -- especially regarding marriage, when they themselves were denied specific marriage rights until Loving v. Virginia. Or Latinos who want to slam the immigration doors shut once they are admitted (hello, Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio!). Or teabaggers who ride their medicare-provided hoveround scooters to town halls only to bitch about socialized medicine.

Is what you're saying, OP, is that you hate hypocrites? Yeah, me too. Funny how one side of the political spectrum is so hypocritical, isn't it?

by Anonymousreply 4408/24/2013

caring about people is a great way to sell your brand.

by Anonymousreply 4508/24/2013

OP's staff failed to respond to her Saturday text again.

by Anonymousreply 4608/24/2013

[quote]I'm a boomer in my 50's

Thank God, the world will be rid of the bitter cunt @ R28 sooner than we thought.

by Anonymousreply 4708/25/2013

[quote]my interest in female issues is nil and void now. You're on your own, bitches.

Oh, whatever will we do?

by Anonymousreply 4808/25/2013

seek therapy, you mess.

by Anonymousreply 4908/25/2013
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