I just had a fight over the phone with a friend and am really struggling with how I should continue with our friendship.
A little background first. I know I'll get mocked for this, but we met on a message board and for several years our only form of contact was talking on the phone, but we did chat several times a week for long periods.
We live about 4 hours away from each other and have met up in person a few times over the years, but the primary form of communication remains the phone.
Lately we have been going through a rough spot and I find myself arguing, yelling and getting very upset when interacting with him. I find myself wanting distance from him and could see myself drifting away from this friendship, even though I am fond of him and when things are good they are great.
Tonight uncovered some things that really disturbed me about the way he views our friendship and I wanted all the kind posters of the DL to give any advice/flame away if need be.
He basically admitted that he sees me as being blissful happy and that he is supremely unhappy in his life. All of my needs are being met by my other "real life" friends and therefore our relationship should be about him, and not me. I should be listening to his problems, comforting him, etc.
Honestly it sounded more like he wanted a therapist and not a friendship. I realize being a good friend involves listening and comforting, but it must go both ways. I got the sense he feels that it doesn't need to go both ways because I have this "perfect life" (I don't; far from it).
I have a lot invested in this friendship, and I would honestly miss it if it was gone, but I've become so drained and stressed out from it I feel like it's not healthy anymore.
I told him I felt the friendship was broken and needed fixing. He shot back that if I left him he would kill himself, which I told him was a selfish thing to say and amounted to emotional blackmail.
Any thoughts, advice, similar situations?