Or "petite crimes" unit?
Many Dataloungers would like to join. They're rather petty and don't want to have anything to do with major crimes.
Do they have a department of petty crimes for retired men and women with too much time on their hands? "I'll bet it was that neighbor who is violating the noise laws and converting his house into a college dormitory! Yep. I'll bet he's the one who put the sugar in the gas tank!"
"Hey -- I know there's no crime, but let's make sure we keep an eye on the nice old African American guy who lives in the neighborhood with an HOA that allows confederate flag displays, ok? Can't be too careful."
The Petty Crimes Unit could also do those things that Datalounge is always advising its OPs. Like, if someone has a noisy neighbor who might be growing pot in his home, they could notify all the local newspapers and TV channels news departments about it, because surely they would want to cover such a story!
But it would have to be a separate unit from the Animal Rescue Division. Not everyone can tolerate coworkers covered in cat hair.