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I want to be a Kardashian!

I love the black decor throughout the Kardashian compound in Calabasas. Showers of black tile, black toilet paper, black men, black everything. Chic black wardrobe.

I would like to spend my days looking at new real estate because the home I have is just not fabulous enough.

I want to be exhausted from traveling, family vacations, talking to attorneys all day, and doing appearances for whatever it is the fuck I do that makes me millions.

I also want to fool around with my bitchy step-brother Brody Jenner, who just needs a huge dick up his ass because he is never satisfied with anything.

I know I can't be the only one.

by Anonymousreply 2108/28/2013

In other words, you want to be a useless, dumb-fuck famewhore.

by Anonymousreply 107/22/2013

OP,

I realize you thought your little post was going to be read as humorous and ironic, but the real irony is that while you attempt to snark this mental feces you're obsessed with, you're part of the problem, not the white-gypsy trash you're watching.

Lowlifes like you, OP; poorly educated, lower income, the bottom feeders of society is what keeps this shit front and center, and you can't get enough of it... You're like a diseased pig, dying from eating rotted meat yet you keep gorging on it because you just don't know any better.

More people would pity you if intelligent society weren't laughing at you so hard.

by Anonymousreply 207/22/2013

Oh god, I can just hear R2 being played by Joan Crawford. The flaring nostrils, the steely gaze framed by slashes of black brows, the quivering hauteur.

But really Mary, take it down a notch. That's what pills are for.

by Anonymousreply 307/22/2013

I want to be r2, stomping my tiny little hooves in righteous indignation and shaking my tiny fists at the sky in fury!

by Anonymousreply 407/22/2013

I just think it would be great if I could have sex with one guy, have a camera follow me, and end up having my biggest issue being where to move my backyard pool. Sure, they are tiresome, but Im not a hater.

by Anonymousreply 507/22/2013

Actually OP,it is you whom we hate.

by Anonymousreply 607/22/2013

Black toilet paper is a thing?

by Anonymousreply 707/22/2013

It is r7. Kris Jenner uses black TP, to match her bathroom. Kim said she refuses to use it because she wants to see what she's wiping.

by Anonymousreply 807/22/2013

[quote]Kim said she refuses to use it because she wants to see what she's wiping.

What the fuck is wrong with these people? It's a rhetorical question indeed since everything is wrong with them. Yeah, I know this is reality TV, but is a discussion like that necessary especially with family members? Couldn't Seacrest have edited out dialogue like that? You know, some things are just better left unsaid.

by Anonymousreply 907/22/2013

Kim should use the black TP to make sure she got all the cum leakage.

by Anonymousreply 1107/22/2013

[all posts by tedious troll removed.]

by Anonymousreply 1207/24/2013

I wanna fuck Brody Jenner

by Anonymousreply 1307/24/2013

I agree with op. it would be fun. Their lives are pretty large. They do appear to be the happiest dumb fucks ever

by Anonymousreply 1407/24/2013

Bruce Jenner should be ashamed of himself.

by Anonymousreply 1507/24/2013

[all posts by tedious troll removed.]

by Anonymousreply 1607/25/2013

I love that Kris has a separate, fully staffed office away from home to manage her clan. They are besides themselves.

by Anonymousreply 1707/25/2013

I want Kris to rent and decorate me a house in Malibu bitches!

by Anonymousreply 1808/28/2013

Yes, I too would love for my depraved, famewhore mother to build an empire off of my asshole and the general stupidity of reality TV viewers.

by Anonymousreply 1908/28/2013

I want to go to JC Penney

by Anonymousreply 2008/28/2013

Relevant.

KRIS KANCELLED!!!!!!

by Anonymousreply 2108/28/2013
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