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My neighbor's hot, shirtless son, recently home from college, is outside setting up for their garage sale.

He looks like a Men's Health cover come to life. Lord give me strenght. The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, the wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round...

by Anonymousreply 6407/06/2013

Op = cougar.

by Anonymousreply 106/29/2013

Go on over and be sure to mention how hot he's grown up to be. Twice.

by Anonymousreply 206/29/2013

Useless without pictures. Surely you need to go garage aale-ing RIGHT NOW, neighbor.

by Anonymousreply 306/29/2013

Mamma will be by to pick up some bric 'n' brac 'n' knick 'n' knack 'n' things. If he passes Mamma's look 'n' sniff test Mamma will try and pick up a college joy boy for the evening.

Your description has Mamma's mussy dripping like a swamp cooler on a hot, humid, steamy afternoon.

Time to freshen up my best MuuMuu in the drier with a Febreeze spritz!

Mamma like!

by Anonymousreply 406/29/2013

People still do garage sales?

by Anonymousreply 506/29/2013

His pecs are like granite, and his nipple placement is perfection. That can't be genetics, because his father is a bit dumpy looking.

by Anonymousreply 606/29/2013

Gee, R6...maybe he's a....queerboy!

by Anonymousreply 706/29/2013

Yes, r5, and as long as you continue to be a proudly naive imbecile, people will continue to have garage sales.

by Anonymousreply 806/29/2013

R8 ?????????????????????

by Anonymousreply 906/29/2013

R9. Let R8 be, her 2nd hand Compaq was slow to boot up this morning and it has her nipples all twisted.

by Anonymousreply 1006/29/2013

Christ, this guy knows he's scorching hot, and is probably enjoying giving the neighborhood voyeurs a cheap thrill. I was talking to his father last month. I casually asked about Scott (the son) and how he was doing in college. The dad replied that he guess he's doing ok, but everytime he calls it goes right to voicemail. He went on to joke that Scott is probably getting laid everytime he calls. That conversation is now playing over and over in my mind, imagining all the hot pussy throwing themselves at Scott BEGGING for him to fuck their dripping wetz and thinking about the ecstasy he must bring to so many women. Ugh, I need a cold shower.

by Anonymousreply 1106/29/2013

OP...hope you have a Mr. Clean miracle eraser to clean the spooge off the wall under the window you are being a curtain sister from!

by Anonymousreply 1206/29/2013

Get pictures~

by Anonymousreply 1306/29/2013

Make sure to spray some Grey Flannel on your caftan before you saunter over. And you might consider a Crest White Strip and a breath mint, you creepy old queen.

by Anonymousreply 1406/29/2013

I'll save the smegma for you, r14.

by Anonymousreply 1506/29/2013

OP are you openly out to your neighbors?

by Anonymousreply 1606/29/2013

This is why I hate us.

Get away from the fucking window!

by Anonymousreply 1706/29/2013

"He went on to joke that Scott is probably getting laid everytime he calls."

Does his dad live in a temporal pocket, hailing from the 1960's? What dad discusses his son's sex life with anyone, much less a stranger?

by Anonymousreply 1806/29/2013

Garage sales are not allowed in my neighborhood.

by Anonymousreply 1906/29/2013

From the 1960s? Welcome to 2013 R18. People are more frank about topics that used to considered private and personal. And it was just a joke, not actually talking about his sex life.

And really? Of course people are going to look at an attractive person. There is nothing unusual about that R17.

by Anonymousreply 2006/29/2013

[quote]He went on to joke that Scott is probably getting laid everytime he calls.

That's a rather strange remark. Kids ignore their parents' calls all the time, because they're kids and don't want to be checked up on. That was a weird comment.

by Anonymousreply 2106/29/2013

OP's little Edie costume for the day is her five sizes too small leather hot-pants,black fish-net tank top,and ballet flats.

Don't forget to rub an ice cube on your nips just before you pop over!

by Anonymousreply 2206/29/2013

Let's hear some further adventures of OP.

by Anonymousreply 2307/01/2013

What's a garage sale?

by Anonymousreply 2407/01/2013

holy crap

by Anonymousreply 2507/03/2013

We're still waiting for photos, OP.

by Anonymousreply 2607/03/2013

Wow. Even something as innocuous as a good view makes the oldies here jealous.

by Anonymousreply 2707/03/2013

OP pushed it too far. Now he's tied to a post in the back yard sucking off the guy.

by Anonymousreply 2807/03/2013

[quote] her 2nd hand Compaq was slow to boot up this morning and it has her nipples all twisted.

I LOVE it when my nipples get twisted.


by Anonymousreply 2907/03/2013

This is so silly

by Anonymousreply 3007/03/2013

Fall and pretend to break your hip in the backyard, then call out HELP ME, HELPPPP MEEEEEEE ... he'll come running and swaddle you in his masculine arms.

by Anonymousreply 3107/03/2013

I overheard him and his dad arguing last night. Scott's mother passed away a few years ago, and Scott's dad since remarried. His new wife is rocking hot. In my feverish, devilish mind, the dad caught Scott fucking his step-mother. It can't be easy for her. She has this beautiful man of raw masculinity walking around the house shirtless. It would too much for any normal human being to take.

by Anonymousreply 3207/03/2013

Now, if only there were a way for someone to capture an image, then magically transfer it to a machine where more people could see it...

Oh, well. OP is apparently stuck in the 1930s.

by Anonymousreply 3307/03/2013

I'll try to find a pic. I know he was photographed with a few other students for the new cover of his college's catalog. He's THAT telegenic, I guess. I will try to find that one, but I doubt he'll be shirtless hahahaha

by Anonymousreply 3407/03/2013

Let's go, OP. Post the pictures.

by Anonymousreply 3507/05/2013

Please tell me the boy is not 18 and a college freshman? I'm hoping at least 21...please don't be a pedo, OP.

by Anonymousreply 3607/05/2013

Have you thought about offering him a nickel to bust up a chiffarobe for you?

by Anonymousreply 3707/06/2013

OP = Pope Benedick

by Anonymousreply 3807/06/2013

Does your bf (who you claim to have cheated on with his ex) know you lust after your neighbor's son, OP?

by Anonymousreply 3907/06/2013

"The boy" would have to be 14 or under- or at least appear to be in that age group- for the op to be a "pedo", r36.

by Anonymousreply 4007/06/2013

Are we really 40 posts into this with no one finding the earlier version of this saga?

Or at least alluding to where we left off?

by Anonymousreply 4107/06/2013

R40 it's still nasty.

by Anonymousreply 4207/06/2013


by Anonymousreply 4307/06/2013

Garage sales, Pffftttt....

Oh, dear.

What kind of family does this young man come from? No one has garage sales anymore. No one with any class, at least.

Dears, if you are short on cash try selling your soiled junk on ebay, or to a private seller, or maybe to a store.

Stop defiling the neighborhood, you twits.

by Anonymousreply 4407/06/2013

Oh, my. Someone R44 forgot to take her anti-twat pill this morning.

by Anonymousreply 4507/06/2013

I don't think we've adequately ripped R5's new asshole yet. His was the biggest crime committed here today.

Yes, there are still garage sales, as well as drive-ins, drive-thrus, car washes, classified ads, babysitters, hitchhikers, checkbooks, people who don't use direct deposit, cathode ray television sets, analog tape, vinyl records, barber shops, trick-or-treaters.

I know, it's laughable and absurd that this garage sale with its hot, shirtless college boy setting up the tables doesn't exist in a purely digital, downloadable form (way more convenient that way), but some people are just still so pathetically BACKWARD.

by Anonymousreply 4607/06/2013

OP, go over and engage him in a conversation in which you ask him if he'll be selling any of his underwear in the garage sale, and advise him that it'll probably fetch a higher price if he doesn't wash it first. This is just the right way to subtly telegraph your interest in him to see if he responds.

by Anonymousreply 4707/06/2013

I should have a garage sale and get rid of my cathode ray tv, and maybe my records (or else buy a turntable).

by Anonymousreply 4807/06/2013

What has replaced the Advocate pink pages as the place to sell your soiled subtrou in the 21st century?

by Anonymousreply 4907/06/2013


by Anonymousreply 5007/06/2013

R45, inviting unwanted denizens into the neighborhood who take up the parking spaces, clog traffic, and acquire an opportunity to case the neighborhood for future burglaries is NOT a good idea.

Secondly, there are so many fucking weirdos that one shouldn't advertise where children live.

Why invite the general unwashed public onto your street and expose your neighbors privacy so that you can sell your dirty bras, R45?

by Anonymousreply 5107/06/2013

Garage sales, pffftt...

So tacky, so very, very, tacky.


Oh, dear.




Multiple sleeve and neck tattoos.


Such horror.

by Anonymousreply 5207/06/2013

Glad I don't live with the level of fear R51 R44 faces every moment of his existence on this planet. Mommy must have pumped him full of "stranger danger" terror from the day he could think.

by Anonymousreply 5307/06/2013

r51, what opportunity does a garage sale give to case the neighborhood for future burglaries that the burglar couldn't get just driving down the street any time he wanted?

by Anonymousreply 5407/06/2013

R53 just proudly sold her size 16 pink capri pants that say "Aloha" on the rear end for 25 cents and BOY DID SHE PUT ME IN MY PLACE!

by Anonymousreply 5507/06/2013

I recently visited a garage sale held court by a lesbian couple and boy, what a collection!

I saw a well worn, tattered copy of Sybil, what looked like ten years worth of old Cat Fancy magazines, bright pink and yellow used Crocs, a pair of ancient Birkenstocks size ten, a Holly Near album, and dozens of lavender tank tops.

This is why folks just love garage sales, I suppose.

by Anonymousreply 5607/06/2013

More, please! I am sitting here, sweltering (no AC, and laughing my ass off - love you guys!

by Anonymousreply 5707/06/2013

OP, pull a Gladys Kravitz. Wait till the shirtless son is the only one home then grab a measuring cup, go knock on the door and say, "Could you help me? I'm smelling cookies - I mean I'm [italic]baking[/italic]cookies and I need to borrow a cup, sugar. Er, that is, a cup OF sugar. I brought my own, you see, I just need to cup yours. Your sugar that is! Oh, I feel faint!"

Then toss the cup aside and collapse in his arms.

by Anonymousreply 5807/06/2013

Don't forget to ask him if he wants some sugar from you. Summer break's no fun without an allowance.

by Anonymousreply 5907/06/2013

Entice him into your lair with the lure of dope and porn.

by Anonymousreply 6007/06/2013

Garage sale ?? Isn't this what Amazon Marketplace (or even Craigslist) are for now ??

by Anonymousreply 6107/06/2013

[all posts by tedious troll removed.]

by Anonymousreply 6207/06/2013

[quote]Pic or it didn't happen.

I think R58 painted a pretty elaborate picture.

by Anonymousreply 6307/06/2013

Don't you need someone to help you paint a room, or clean out your cellar or garage, OP?

by Anonymousreply 6407/06/2013
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