Serving up this steaming pile of
Celebrity Gossip
Gay Politics
Gay News
and Pointless Bitchery
Since 1995

What do you think...

I am sending some old wedding pictures from a former best friends wedding.

I was a member of the wedding in the '70's...so no digital stuff flying around. I offered this person genuine affection and friendship for all these decades and it just isn't apreciated anymore....not for years.

I am doing a major cleanout and found the pics and rather than toss them I thought I wpould send them along to them.

Message....I have moved along too.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 3706/22/2013

Send them, along with a bunch of dead flowers.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 106/20/2013

Send them. It's the nice thing to do. It's also a win-win: you get rid of junk, and they get great memory fodder.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 206/20/2013

Only send them if you don't mind the recipient ever acknowledging them in any way.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 306/20/2013

Send them but with good intentions...

Don't conjure up negativity.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 406/20/2013

Just toss them and forget about it - anything else merely proves that you, in fact, have not moved along too...

by Or should I just burn them?reply 506/20/2013

Send them along with a vile of blood.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 606/20/2013

Rub shit on the back of them.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 706/20/2013

Why stir shit and cause drama? They've obviously moved on. Grow up and throw them the fuck out.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 806/20/2013

What is a "vile of blood"?

by Or should I just burn them?reply 906/20/2013

Send anonymously.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 1006/20/2013

I like R10

by Or should I just burn them?reply 1106/20/2013

Shit can them.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 1206/20/2013

OP = Drama queen

by Or should I just burn them?reply 1306/20/2013

Toss the pics. Only reason why you'd send is to hold onto the chance that your former friend(s) would ever show appreciation. Punch and delete. Now. Move on.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 1406/20/2013

Yeah, move on. Been there. Done that. I was disappointed in the (non)reaction.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 1506/20/2013

I'd send them with an impersonal but pleasant note: "Just found these when cleaning closets and thought you might like to have them. Hope all's well, [signature]".

Put your return address on the envelope & the recipient can get in touch with you if so inclined. But I agree with R3 that you should not expect to receive a response -- if you do, it will be a happy (I hope) surprise.

I've been in your position with people who used to be close friends but inexplicably drew away -- it's infuriating, sad, mystifying -- anger & resentment don't help, so I've learned to just shrug & move on. Old pictures can be bittersweet, but why not share them with someone who might appreciate them?

by Or should I just burn them?reply 1606/20/2013

This thread is useless without pictures.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 1706/20/2013

A horse's head enclosed with the photos would send the proper message.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 1806/21/2013

OP, you've been a friend who pulled away. Everyone has. It's normal and a part of life. Each of us is the star of our own "movie" and we forget that not every character in our move is watching our movie with the rapt attention that we are. They have their own movie. Send the pictures or don't send the pictures. But if you send them, send them because you once truly cared about the person in the pictures and you remember them fondly and want them to know and that's all. Life is too short for an agenda beyond that.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 1906/21/2013

I agree with the sentiment that you're probably only thinking of sending them in hopes that your friend either 1) finally shows some appreciation or 2) contacts you to rekindle your friendship. Either toss them or keep them for your own memories, anything else just reeks of drama...

Hm, maybe that's why they moved along...

And no, you haven't.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 2006/21/2013

I weep for your pain.

How do you find the strength to go on?

by Or should I just burn them?reply 2106/21/2013

Send the pictures. Anything less would be petty and would smack of taking revenge. You don't need to jump through hoops by hiding who they're from or writing any accompanying letters, just send them.

A friend of mine lost all his photographs and personal mementos in a house fire. Two years later he died from AIDS. His friends and family would dearly love some copies of those to turn up somehow.

There may be a similar story attached to some of the pictures you have.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 2206/21/2013

Just send them with a quick note -- and I mean quick, a scribbled "found these and thought you would want them" on a piece of note paper. Pack them into a small box or padded envelope, send them off, forget all about it.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 2306/21/2013

Scan them, erase yourself digitally from the picture, print them and send that version.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 2506/21/2013

I think you took the high road, OP. Good job! Onwards and upwards.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 2606/21/2013

[quote]I finally faced the truth and do not wish any further contact from them.

You keep telling yourself that. Your actions say otherwise. If you really wanted no further contact with them, you wouldn't have bothered to send them, nor would you have felt compelled to tell them that you were "moving." Doing so shows that you're either trying to illicit some sort of response out of them or you're trying to show them that you don't care that they've moved on because so have you. And again, that reeks of you not having moved on at all.

Newsflash, they're still not going to care.

You're passive aggressive and manipulative and that's exactly why they dropped you.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 2706/21/2013

Why send them at all? If I sent them, I would at least scan the pics so I could keep my OWN memories. Good or bad, it's a part of your life, too, being in that wedding and having had that friend. Why try to "erase" the past? You can't anyway. Embrace it and remember the good times.

Sounds like you are still bound up with some unresolved hurts or emotions that are clouding this for you. Until you can sort through the underlying reasons and get real with yourself, you will not be happy no matter what you do with the pictures.

This is not about the pictures.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 2806/21/2013

Go ahead and send them if you don't mind looking pitiable.

[quote]Send them along with a vile of blood.

Vial, you fool. Don't spend any more time on the Internet; go back to school. That was really sad.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 2906/21/2013

R21. Do you tenderize nicely when braised or always tough?

by Or should I just burn them?reply 3006/21/2013

I don't understand why you simply don't throw them out? I think we have all had good friends that we lost along the way...that's life.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 3106/21/2013

R31

What is there to understand? OP is a pathetic, Drama Queen who doesn't realize how transparent he is. Obviously hurt that these people want nothing to do with him, he's trying to prove to them he doesn't care, but actually hopes the act will get them to resurface into his life.

Not gonna happen. He sent them and now it'll cement to them that they made a good decision in dropping him.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 3206/21/2013

R32, I think you've gotten it just about right.

OP, it's over, let it go before you hurt yourself again.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 3306/21/2013

Boy,you guys are tough on op!

Yes,maybe he wants to rekindle a past friendship and the wedding pics are a good excuse,but like others have said,send them without expecting any reciprocation. It's a good way of cleaning out your house and giving something away that means more to someone else.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 3406/21/2013

Thanks everyone for your thoughts.

I guess the end of this friendship hurt more than I realized. We had gone to school then worked together.

I missed one of their big weding anniversary parties which was out of town since I was not in a good place emotionally...don't think I was ever forgiven for that one.

Anyway..I had not mailed the pics...I have trashed them...since I really have moved on.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 3506/21/2013

Be sure to include a selfie of you showing your hole. Hide it in the middle of the pile, a total drive-by.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 3606/22/2013

Upload the photos to a swinger's site and then anonymously email the girl you saw her stuff and want to meet her.

by Or should I just burn them?reply 3706/22/2013
Loading
Need more help? Click Here.