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What do I say?

I'm having dinner tonight with an old friend. He's an academic, and every few years he goes on sabbatical and leaves the country. While he's away sends all his friends multiple lengthy updates on what he's doing by e-mail, but they're so overdetailed and hard to parse I don't even read them anymore. (He's fun in person, but long-winded and pompous by email.) He's going to ask me tonight if I've been reading his updates: what do I say?

by Anonymousreply 1305/24/2013

Read them all before you go.

by Anonymousreply 105/24/2013

SLAP HIS FACE VICIOUSLY!!

by Anonymousreply 205/24/2013

Get your assistant to write up brief summaries.

by Anonymousreply 305/24/2013

Tell the truth: "You're a lot of fun in person, but an insufferable, stuck-up gasbag over email. Have a nice life and go fuck yourself." Then throw your napkin in his face and storm out.

by Anonymousreply 405/24/2013

Just skim them before you go. Or mainly ask him more about himself or the things you both have in common as friends.

by Anonymousreply 505/24/2013

tell him you save them for when you can savor them.

by Anonymousreply 605/24/2013

Wasted again in margaritaville.

by Anonymousreply 705/24/2013

Go for high drama. Throw your drink in his face and then burst into tears. Tell him your crying because you can't read.

by Anonymousreply 805/24/2013

r5 is right, plus your friend will spend the entire dinner talking about himself if you just give him the least bit of encouragement.

by Anonymousreply 905/24/2013

I didn't read your post op. I found it too hard to parse.

by Anonymousreply 1005/24/2013

This thread made me LOL several times ...some of you bitches are hilarious.

by Anonymousreply 1105/24/2013

OP, why would any conversation involve him or his correspondence?

Keep the focus on YOU and your tile grout issues.

by Anonymousreply 1205/24/2013

"Indeed I do, but honestly they're so detailed that I can't remember everything you've written."

by Anonymousreply 1305/24/2013
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