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I was "shushed" at a restaurant last night

I was dining out with four friends. We were laughing and a bit loud, but hardly out of control - the entire restaurant was noisy. An old coot came over and said in the most sickeningly condescending way possible, "I'M GLAD YOU'RE HAVING FUN, BUT LET'S TONE IT DOWN AND BE QUIET."

Uhhh. Later, the management came over and apologized on his behalf. Which was nice. But then. THEN! As he was leaving with his snooty family, he came to our table AGAIN and hissed, "HAVE SOME MANNERSSSSS!"

What would you have done?

by This did not end wellreply 13009/11/2014

Toned it down,maybe?

by This did not end wellreply 305/16/2013

I hate obnoxious diners and I would argue that guy had as much of a right to a pleasant dining experience as you. One time I was having brunch and some snooty queen was talking loudly about his family's lake house in Michigan. Several people around him were visibly irritated because it's just fucking rude to act like everyone owes you attention.

by This did not end wellreply 405/16/2013

OP, what would I have done? I would've apologized to him with a kind, SINCERE smile on my face and said something like, "I'm so sorry, I hadn't realized we were disturbing you." and that's it. Period. He wanted to be acknowledged. And you know, when we are out with friends we sometimes don't realize that we are disturbing other people.

by This did not end wellreply 605/16/2013

He should have walked over to your table, splashed a margarita in your face and hissed, "Simmer down bitches!"

by This did not end wellreply 705/16/2013

OP: Your talking about leaking during double-penetration made their table uncomfortable.

When they realized you were actually talking about fisting, that was probably the final straw.

by This did not end wellreply 905/16/2013

I'd have cunt punted his wife and caught his kid's hair on fire, then gone on with my conversation with my friends.

by This did not end wellreply 1005/16/2013

You obviously knew you were a bit out of line with your behavior. It's ok to have a good time in a public venue, but you have to realize that it's not all about you. If you had apologized, you would have felt better. You are still feeling guilty.

by This did not end wellreply 1105/16/2013

....and another Ugly American appears......

OP proves the rep is substantiated.

by This did not end wellreply 1205/16/2013

What state did this take place in? Or province?

by This did not end wellreply 1305/16/2013

In his position, I would have give your table a healthy hip check to spill all of your drinks.

In your position, I would have broken into song - perhaps the chorus of [italic]We're Not Going To Take It[/italic]. Every drunk knows that song and your probably look like Dee Snyder so it would have worked out well for you.

by This did not end wellreply 1405/16/2013

This took place at a nice Manhattan restaurant. We were not being any louder than any other nearby party. The guy had it out for us from the get-go - sneering and leering as we were seated. And nobody was drunk.

by This did not end wellreply 1505/16/2013

[quote]And nobody was drunk.

Whatever you say, Liza.

by This did not end wellreply 1605/16/2013

You are NOT in your living room. Have some decorum.

by This did not end wellreply 1705/16/2013

I think you have to realize, OP, that the presumption is against you.

by This did not end wellreply 1805/16/2013

I feel the need to shush OP right now.

by This did not end wellreply 1905/16/2013

What was the restaurant name and city?

by This did not end wellreply 2005/16/2013

If you want to be loud and obnoxious, stay home.

by This did not end wellreply 2105/16/2013

I had no idea that the Dl'ers were such prisspots. Oh wait.

by This did not end wellreply 2305/16/2013

I believe OP. I had something similar happen and I was not particularly loud at all. And it was also an old coot. I was too stunned to say anything. Anyways, miserable people are miserable enough, you don't have to say anything back to them. They create their own hell.

by This did not end wellreply 2405/16/2013

Men are obnoxious. Old men even worse.

by This did not end wellreply 2605/16/2013

It was a hate message, face it. If your table were no more obnoxious than the rest, you were targeted.

by This did not end wellreply 2705/16/2013

Straight self-loathers hate it when the gays are having more fun than them.

by This did not end wellreply 2805/16/2013

On a related note, filming for the next season of the Real Housewives of New York has just begun.

by This did not end wellreply 3105/16/2013

I followed him out. I had to. I was enraged because we were being very quiet and respectful. I said to him, Sir, you've marred our experience. We are in public, and in public, sometimes people make noise.

He refused to tell me his name and basically hustled into a waiting cab.

by This did not end wellreply 3205/16/2013

Homophobic assholes like 'the shusher' hate to see gays living life normally. They want the gays closeted and afraid.

by This did not end wellreply 3305/16/2013

OP, perhaps you need to learn basic manners, dude.

by This did not end wellreply 3505/16/2013

Jesus, the prissy Pollyannas on this board!

Old guy sounds like an uptight homophobic cunt, much like most of the replies in this thread.

by This did not end wellreply 3605/16/2013

"Sir, you've marred our experience"

Oh my, such great dignity! I just laughed out loud. How terribly upsetting that your feefees should be hurt, and your experience marred in such an egregious manner.

As one DL'er to another: Move it along, Toots.

by This did not end wellreply 3705/16/2013

OP, was your group composed of Midwesterners?

I've noticed we tend to go full goose in groups.

by This did not end wellreply 4005/16/2013

I am out in CA to deal with a family matter. I have coffee at a Panera every morning to have some "me" time. It seems that nearly every day I have to go to a table an "shush" someone as you put it. It is either someone who has no idea how loudly he/she is talking or some parent allowing his/her child to watch a video w/o headphones, or a gaggle of women shrieking.

OP, I am sure you and your party were behaving badly.

by This did not end wellreply 4105/16/2013

OP, I have told the following to people before when in a confrontation and it NEVER fails to explode the situation:

"Would you say that to me if I was black?"

By the way, I am also the original DL poster all those years ago who said "Anyone who calls me by a girl's name gets a punch in the nose and their number deleted from my cellphone."

by This did not end wellreply 4205/16/2013

[quote]He refused to tell me his name and basically hustled into a waiting cab.

If he had told you his name, what were you planning to do with that information?

by This did not end wellreply 4305/16/2013

If OP wasn't really being any louder than anyone else in the restaurant I would've told the old fart to stay home if he can't handle dining in public. Restaurants are not libraries.

by This did not end wellreply 4505/16/2013

The person who was pissed off by you loudmouths should have told management. They should have spoken with you.

by This did not end wellreply 4605/16/2013

[quote]straight self-loathers

Isn't that redundant, dear?

by This did not end wellreply 4705/16/2013

R46 has it. I would have told the old fart to die and rid the world of one less self-righteous old fart.

by This did not end wellreply 4805/16/2013

Oh, shush the fuck up, bitch.

by This did not end wellreply 4905/16/2013

R42, That is a stupid comeback, and would not change anything. I have no problem telling a group of black people to put a lid on it. Actually, your comment is rather racist as the implication is that black people are to be feared.

by This did not end wellreply 5005/16/2013

R42 is Debbie Drama!

R44. and the bully shows up! All gays are to be hidden from public view! Shush!

MASSIVE EYE ROLL

by This did not end wellreply 5105/16/2013

OP, are you a cast member of the show, "it's always sunny in philadelphia"?

by This did not end wellreply 5205/16/2013

You should have gone quietly to management, and asked that the gentleman be told not to visit your table again.

by This did not end wellreply 5305/16/2013

Why the assumption that man was "miserable" just because he doesn't want dinner accompanied by twinks shrieking? I don't blame him.

by This did not end wellreply 5405/16/2013

Good for that guy who told ya to stfu.

by This did not end wellreply 5505/16/2013

Which Manhattan restaurant was it OP and which bourough did you travel in from? Or did you come from NJ? LI? Rockland County?

by This did not end wellreply 5605/16/2013

OP sounds like a douche who got called out for behaving like one. Loud, obnoxious people at a restaurant expose themselves to being shushed, sorry if you can't handle this basic rule of socialization, OP. Don't be such a pussy about it, just own up to being an arrogant, loutish moron and try to learn your lesson here. Believe me, there's one for you in this whole incident.

by This did not end wellreply 5705/16/2013

I'm not impolite to other diners, and neither are my friends, so of course this never happened to me.

You're a troll, but also likely a loudmouth, OP. A disgrace.

by This did not end wellreply 5805/16/2013

[quote]He refused to tell me his name and basically hustled into a waiting cab.

This was a hookup that didn't happen. No one was shushed--someone, namely OP, was REJECTED by someone who then FLED without even giving his name. In retribution, OP concocted this stupid story, and dubbed the rejector an "old coot." Pathetic.

by This did not end wellreply 5905/16/2013

R59, or more likely the guy was an old coot who hired the OP off of rentboy.com and fled when he saw the damaged goods in the flesh.

by This did not end wellreply 6005/16/2013

So where's OP?

by This did not end wellreply 6105/16/2013

I would have grabbed my crotch and told him to suck it.

OP was in a public place and as he said a lot of tables were loud. If the old coot wanted peace and quiet, he should've stayed home or gone to a Buddhist temple.

by This did not end wellreply 6205/16/2013

Hometown Buffet can have a tough crowd.

by This did not end wellreply 6305/16/2013

OP, he was wrong to speak to you that way. He should have walked over and slapped your whole table in the mouth with his colostomy bag.

by This did not end wellreply 6405/16/2013

R64, I bet the "old coot" was probably 40.

by This did not end wellreply 6505/16/2013

[quote]By the way, I am also the original DL poster all those years ago who said "Anyone who calls me by a girl's name gets a punch in the nose and their number deleted from my cellphone."

I'm on your side, R42.

Never understood why being gay must be equated with being sissy and camping it up.

OP, you say you were laughing and a bit loud; as R18 says, you have to realize that the presumption is against you. But you said nothing "gay." What I find interesting about the post is how quickly all made it a gay vs. straight thing.

by This did not end wellreply 6605/16/2013

this is DL so the old coot was probably ancient, you know, 34 years old.

by This did not end wellreply 6705/16/2013

[quote]It seems that nearly every day I have to go to a table an "shush" someone as you put it.

If this happens to you "nearly every day," the problem is you.

by This did not end wellreply 6805/16/2013

[quote]As he was leaving with his snooty family, he came to our table AGAIN and hissed, "HAVE SOME MANNERSSSSS!"

This never happened.

by This did not end wellreply 6905/16/2013

[quote]What would you have done?

Thrown my drink at them.

by This did not end wellreply 7005/16/2013

[quote]This took place at a nice Manhattan restaurant.

You aren't allowed to have fun in today's Manhattan.

by This did not end wellreply 7105/16/2013

I would have pulled a chair up to his table, stood on it with my back toward the table, bent over and let out the loudest, smelliest fart I could muster. But then I have a flair for the melodramatic.

by This did not end wellreply 7205/16/2013

[quote]By the way, I am also the original DL poster all those years ago who said "Anyone who calls me by a girl's name gets a punch in the nose and their number deleted from my cellphone."

Hey. We didn't care then, and we don't care now.

Egocentric much?

by This did not end wellreply 7305/16/2013

Why the assumption that man was "miserable" just because he doesn't want dinner accompanied by twinks gibbering and shrieking?

by This did not end wellreply 7405/16/2013

"I suppose you were a lot more fun before your ball sac hung down around your knees!"

by This did not end wellreply 7505/16/2013

[quote]Hey. We didn't care then, and we don't care now.

Egocentric much?

Coming from someone who speaks for the board...

by This did not end wellreply 7605/16/2013

I hate loud people so good for "the old coot"

by This did not end wellreply 7705/16/2013

If you had had a gun you could have shot him and claimed that he was threatening you.We would have supported you.

by This did not end wellreply 7805/16/2013

Fave it, New York queens are the worst, mixing entitlement with obnoxious behavior.

by This did not end wellreply 7905/16/2013

I commend the old coot for standing up against obnoxious queens like OP

by This did not end wellreply 8005/16/2013

Said nothing.

But the second time he came over, I would have responded, "I heard you the first time, old man. Go away, you're bothering me!"

by This did not end wellreply 8205/16/2013

In the movie "Shushed" the old coot will be played by Clint Eastwood and OP will be played by Ross Mathews

by This did not end wellreply 8305/16/2013

Any time anyone comes to my table to say something shitty like that I alway order something, like

"We'll take some more water when you get a chance"

Or, "Can we get some more butter, please?"

Treat them like they're a waiter.. Works every time.....

by This did not end wellreply 8405/16/2013

R45 wins

by This did not end wellreply 8505/16/2013

The shusher is a homophobic jerk, and was just out to ruin your good time. This can happen, even if you are quiet!!

If you really were too loud, the management would have come over and shushed you.

by This did not end wellreply 8605/16/2013

I've been seated next to rowdy groups before. I've always just assumed it was MY problem to ask to be seated somewhere else if I wanted some peace and quiet. You can't dictate the noise level of other diners. And you look like a first class asshole if you take it upon yourself to throw a wet blanket on a party in progress.

Of course, all bets are off when it comes to screaming kids. That is just maddening.

by This did not end wellreply 8705/16/2013

You were probably douchebags, but he should have gone to the maitre d' and let him tell you that you were being loud. Always get the help to do your dirty work.

by This did not end wellreply 8805/16/2013

[quote]I've been seated next to rowdy groups before. I've always just assumed it was MY problem to ask to be seated somewhere else if I wanted some peace and quiet. You can't dictate the noise level of other diners.

Oh, grow a backbone instead of that overcooked strand of spaghetti. There is no reason to hide behind the skirts of the waitstaff.

by This did not end wellreply 8905/16/2013

I'm done with you, shushee. No star for you anymore.

by This did not end wellreply 9005/16/2013

OP, your repeat use of the word "then" in your account tells us EVERYTHING we need to know about your demeanor.

by This did not end wellreply 9105/16/2013

Is it worse to be shushed at or hissed at?

by This did not end wellreply 9205/16/2013

OP, you forgot to mention you could smell the seepage in his colostomy bag and how his dentures rattled when he yelled at you.

by This did not end wellreply 9305/16/2013

[quote] Anyways, miserable people are miserable enough

Anyone who says "anyways" should have their clock cleaned for them.

by This did not end wellreply 9405/16/2013

I was at a restaurant with some loud people this weekend. Two guys in our party were loud and they thought their loudness was funny. It wasn't. One of the guys used to be someone I liked as a friend but he's turned into an asshole libertarian Obama hater. You can probably surmise he was the loudest one. He was also smoking an e cigarette, which was kind of weird because I kept seeing smoke down his end of the table and wondered if he was being asinine enough to be smoking a real cigarette.

I was really mortified by him and made squinty-eyed pained faces every time he yelled like a douche.

by This did not end wellreply 9505/16/2013

Right; screaming kids = not OK.

Grown ass adults = OK.

by This did not end wellreply 9605/16/2013

Whoa, whoa...wait Op and the rest who might defend you!

I understand that to be shushed is not the most pleasant thing that may happen to someone. However, if i was in your place, i would go beyond my disturbance and give it a thought.

First of all, the person who shushed you was an elderly one as i gathered from your description("An old coot came over and said in the most sickeningly... ")It's not so bad to be a little more considerate about older people's sensitivities. They don't have the same stamina younger people have. Secondly, when you speak very loudly in a restaurant, it is highly possible that you may spoil the fun of the other people who are there. You know that other people want to talk to each other too and have their dinner, you are not the only one who needs to express yourself and your feelings.

It's so easy to embrace our wounded pride and to overcome other people's feelings in an argument. Our feelings always get in the way and we can't see objectively. You said that that 'old coot' had the most sickening, condescending tone of voice. Would you prefer that person to yell at you?

Think what really pissed you off. Maybe it wasn't that person. Maybe it was a kind of embarrassment you can't stand to deal with. Maybe, it reminded you of something else. However, you should understand that it's not the same, you must make the distinction.

I assure you, you aren't going to die if you reach deeper next time. And it's not that bad to be embarrassed at times. Don't think about superiority and inferiority, just try to be objective and don't trust always your wounded pride, just a few times.

by This did not end wellreply 9705/16/2013

The fact that he said something to you again on his way out makes me believe that your table was being overly loud.

by This did not end wellreply 9805/17/2013

I thought you wrote "I was slushed", kept reading and wished you were "slushed"

by This did not end wellreply 9905/17/2013

Slushies are fur puppies

by This did not end wellreply 10005/17/2013

I, for one, am imagining a shushing and hissing slap-down.

by This did not end wellreply 10105/17/2013

r84's response is perfect. Clever, classy and effective.

by This did not end wellreply 10205/17/2013

[quote]Any time anyone comes to my table to say something shitty like that

How often does it happen?

by This did not end wellreply 10305/17/2013

I'm with r103! r84, have you ever thought that maybe, if other people come up to your table in restaurants so often to say something shitty that you've developed a standard response to it, that maybe there's something wrong with the way you're behaving in restaurants?

by This did not end wellreply 10405/18/2013

Here's the thing....

OP says that the restaurant was loud. Yet he and his party could clearly be heard above everyone else, enough so that this gentleman approached you.

He was not rude to your party, he was perfectly friendly, and merely asked that you 'tone it down a bit.' Which you apparently did not do.

Management only apologized because you clearly complained about it, yet management also did not ask the man not to approach you again. This suggests that the management realized you were an unreasonable person, and that you and your party were too loud but there was nothing he could do about it without you making a scene.

It's clear that you and your party were too loud, and that you lack basic manners. I.E., you and your friends are assholes.

by This did not end wellreply 10505/18/2013

You can really tell the age demographic of DL by the responses to this.

by This did not end wellreply 10605/18/2013

[quote]Management only apologized because you clearly complained about it, yet management also did not ask the man not to approach you again.

How do you know any of this?

The guy complaining should have let the staff handle the problem, if there was one.

When I was in college an old fuck across the street called the cops because we had a party. During the trial, it came out that none of the other elderly neighbors were bothered by any noise. The guy was just a chronic bitcher.

by This did not end wellreply 10705/18/2013

People attack downward. The guy likely thought you weren't a physical threat therefore he could confront you without any pushback verbally or physically.

by This did not end wellreply 10805/18/2013

OP, when people pull shit like that these days, whip out your smartphone and record them, at the same time threaten them that it will go online if they don't back off. You'd be surprised how quickly people shut up in that situation.

by This did not end wellreply 10905/18/2013

Wow, that's a good one, R109.

by This did not end wellreply 11005/18/2013

I'd make cross sign with my fingers and say "The power of Christ compels you!"

by This did not end wellreply 11105/18/2013

[quote]OP says that the restaurant was loud. Yet he and his party could clearly be heard above everyone else, enough so that this gentleman approached you.

Thank-you for pointing this out.

People like OP have loud voices that carry farther than others. I work in an office with 25 people and I can make out the entire conversation of those people with loud voices 40 feet away, and they arent even shouting. They can never keep any secrets from me. When you add alcohol and excitement to the mix, people like this turn into megaphones, and they dont realize it. They arent trying to be annoying, but it comes off as such because they have no control over their voice-box.

by This did not end wellreply 11205/18/2013

I would have told you to go back to the colonies!

by This did not end wellreply 11305/18/2013

R107...it's called 'analytic thinking'. It's conjecture based on what's he's telling us.

What's NOT conjecture is that OP admits the place was loud, yet he and his party could be heard above all the rest of the noise.

And the person who asked him to tone it down a bit was not rude, yet Op and his party continued to be super loud.

OP is an asshole.

by This did not end wellreply 11405/18/2013

OP, the proper response is for the table to laugh in response. Remember, living well is the best revenge.

by This did not end wellreply 11605/18/2013

I was flushed at restaurant last night.

by This did not end wellreply 11705/18/2013

R115= supplied the coat hanger. And it was his grandmother.

by This did not end wellreply 11805/18/2013

R109...record what? A guy politely asking you to please tone down the noise?? Oh yeah, that's the kind of thing that'll go viral!

It would make more sense to record OP and his party and put THAT online as an example of people being jerks in a public place.

by This did not end wellreply 11905/18/2013

Many years ago, while dining with my parents, this abnoxious woman at the table behind us was talking about the gross foot surgery she'd had the day before. It was her infected big toe...basically talking VERY loudly...loud enough for us to hear her perfectly clearly. I finally had enough and screamed "Enough about your gross toe...we're trying to eat" and another two tables actually applauded :)

My parents were mortified.

by This did not end wellreply 12005/18/2013

When you're in a restaurant just look around and see how many people look low-grade miserable, how few are smiling or, even fewer, actually laughing.

Enjoy yourself OP!

Just because misery loves company doesn't mean you have to join them.

by This did not end wellreply 12205/19/2013

R115, R121 held three girls in an abandoned building for ten years, while repeatedly raping and torturing them. Also, he is the ghost of Michael Jackson.

You must be the OP to be taking this so personally, dear.

by This did not end wellreply 12305/19/2013

This reminds me of that episode of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia called "The Anti-Social Network." Check it out, OP. I think you'll have a laugh.

by This did not end wellreply 12405/19/2013

OMG, Kevin Spacey was at your restaurant last night??!!!???

by This did not end wellreply 12505/19/2013

I'm miserable so therefore I want everyone else to be as well!!! No one can have fun if I can't!!!!!

by This did not end wellreply 12605/19/2013

R123 rimmed John Wayne gacy after he ate a bowl of chili. He also killed Jon Benet.

by This did not end wellreply 12705/20/2013

I was mushed in a restaurant last night.

by This did not end wellreply 12805/20/2013

lol

by This did not end wellreply 12909/11/2014

My reply would have required no words, just one finger.

by This did not end wellreply 13009/11/2014
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