"First World Problems" that don't exist anymore...
"I bought the CD because I loved the single, but the rest of the album is crap!"
"Blockbusters already rented their copy of "Groundhog Day", and there's no other way to see it!
"I want to listen to my music when I go running, but my discman keeps skipping!"
"I want some privacy on this call, but the phone cord doesn't stretch far enough!"
"I have this school report due, but the library is closed!"
"I'm afraid to call them, because what if their mom or dad answers first?"
"I want to use the internet, but someone else is on the phone!"
"I want to know the lyrics to that song I just heard... but the booklet in the front of the CD case only has pictures of the band and writing credits!"
"The economy is so strong, I can't decide which job offer to take after college!"
"My TV Guide didn't come this week, so I don't know what's on my TV right now!"
|by Anonymous||reply 155||08/08/2013|
"My discman"??? Are you writing from the year 2002?
|by Anonymous||reply 1||05/05/2013|
R1, do you not understand the premise of this thread?
|by Anonymous||reply 2||05/05/2013|
The phone company is charging me extra for an unlisted number.
|by Anonymous||reply 3||05/05/2013|
I'm so horny but I don't feel like going all the way to the bath house tonight!
|by Anonymous||reply 4||05/05/2013|
I only call people in my area code, otherwise I have to pay long distance charges.
|by Anonymous||reply 5||05/05/2013|
Damn video store keeps charging me a $1 rewinding fee! I don't fucking have time for this rewinding shit!
|by Anonymous||reply 6||05/05/2013|
Shoot! I forgot the bank closes early on a Friday--now I don't have any money for the weekend!
|by Anonymous||reply 7||05/05/2013|
I can't wait to meet my honey at the gate in the airport. I love seeing his as he walks up the corridor. But there are so many other people waiting too...
|by Anonymous||reply 8||05/05/2013|
So apparently the department store's just been dumping out credit card carbon slips and not properly disposing them!!! What are we gonna do now that our credit card numbers were compromised???!
|by Anonymous||reply 9||05/05/2013|
I hate my job as a file clerk.
|by Anonymous||reply 10||05/05/2013|
I keep getting a busy signal!
|by Anonymous||reply 11||05/05/2013|
There are so many hot teen dudes down at Sears bathroom in the afternoon, I don't have time to suck them all.
|by Anonymous||reply 12||05/05/2013|
Oh no Suzie left already, now I have to wait until she arrives at her destination to call her with this important information!
|by Anonymous||reply 13||05/05/2013|
Ugh get me a pencil. My damn Walkman just ate my mix tape again.
|by Anonymous||reply 14||05/05/2013|
I hope this hotel has vacant rooms. I hope the rooms are nice and that they don't charge a lot. I hope they have a Yellow Pages in the drawer because I don't know any restaurants in this town.
|by Anonymous||reply 15||05/05/2013|
"If we get cut off it's because my iPhone's battery is low."
|by Anonymous||reply 16||05/05/2013|
"Shit, I lost the piece of paper with the guy's number."
|by Anonymous||reply 17||05/05/2013|
Damn the Xerox is down again. How am I going to distribute this important memo?
|by Anonymous||reply 18||05/05/2013|
[quote]I can't wait to meet my honey at the gate in the airport. I love seeing his as he walks up the corridor. But there are so many other people waiting too...
I have to confess I don't know what this is referring to.
|by Anonymous||reply 19||05/05/2013|
The needle on my phonograph is so dull. All my music is gonna sound like crap.
|by Anonymous||reply 20||05/05/2013|
I have to drive down to the post office so I can xerox these tax returns and mail them before midnight!
|by Anonymous||reply 21||05/05/2013|
r19, before 9/11 you could walk through the airport and meet people at the gate.
|by Anonymous||reply 22||05/05/2013|
R19 You used to be able to meet people at the gate. Now they don't let you into an airport without a ticket.
|by Anonymous||reply 23||05/05/2013|
Oh no! A fuse blew, and we don't have any more! I hope I can find a penny to use instead.
|by Anonymous||reply 24||05/05/2013|
R19, when was the last time you met an arrival at the gate, or waited at the gate with someone before they boarded the plane?
|by Anonymous||reply 26||05/05/2013|
Oh no! It's after 6:00 PM -- there isn't a gas station open anywhere!
|by Anonymous||reply 27||05/05/2013|
"I have to go to a store for porn"
I can't believe I'm the first one that's thought of this one!
|by Anonymous||reply 28||05/05/2013|
[quote][R19], when was the last time you met an arrival at the gate, or waited at the gate with someone before they boarded the plane?
Maybe s/he doesn't remember a gentler time, before 9/11 Changed Everything.
|by Anonymous||reply 29||05/05/2013|
There's so much good music on the radio, I can't decide which station to leave it on.
|by Anonymous||reply 30||05/05/2013|
R28 My favorite porn is playing at the theater but I am too embarrassed to be seen going there.
|by Anonymous||reply 31||05/05/2013|
Does anyone have a dime? I have to call home!
|by Anonymous||reply 32||05/05/2013|
I walked up to the pay-phone, but someone had stolen the phone book!
|by Anonymous||reply 33||05/05/2013|
I've got to abort this baby, but I don't have any wire hangers!
|by Anonymous||reply 34||05/05/2013|
Tell the travel agent that when she books our plane tickets, I want to sit in the smoking section! Also, I want the pasta!
|by Anonymous||reply 35||05/05/2013|
Can I borrow a Subway token?
|by Anonymous||reply 36||05/05/2013|
I had a flat tire out in the country and had to walk 15 miles to get help.
|by Anonymous||reply 37||05/05/2013|
I'm taking the first Concorde flight out of London tomorrow morning. Here's the thing: do I have breakfast in the lounge before takeoff, or eat on the plane, because by the time I arrive in Manhattan they'll still be serving breakfast!
|by Anonymous||reply 38||05/05/2013|
Sadly if R36 was in Toronto he'd be handed one.
|by Anonymous||reply 39||05/05/2013|
Sure, I like to read, but this town only has one book store, and who has time to go there and buy books?
|by Anonymous||reply 40||05/05/2013|
I won't know if I took the perfect picture of the sunset until two weeks from now when the photos come back from the developer.
|by Anonymous||reply 41||05/05/2013|
R39 We still have them in LA too.
|by Anonymous||reply 42||05/05/2013|
I'm so jealous of the rich people that have cell phones!
|by Anonymous||reply 43||05/05/2013|
I surfed through all the television channels and there was nothing worth watching.
|by Anonymous||reply 44||05/05/2013|
I can't remember the name of the actor in my favorite movie!!!
And what other movies was he in?!?
|by Anonymous||reply 45||05/05/2013|
Thank goodness those undesirables go to their own school.
|by Anonymous||reply 46||05/05/2013|
The TV listings in the for the Late Late movies n the paper just says "Movies 'Til Dawn"--no further details. Now I have to sneak out to the family room and watch all night, in case I miss something great. Tomorrow in class I'll be exhausted.
|by Anonymous||reply 47||05/05/2013|
All my catalogs are last season. I wish I had new ones so I could order stuff now.
|by Anonymous||reply 48||05/05/2013|
Dammit! It's going to take forever for my dinner to heat up in the oven!
I'm tired of having to get up off the couch and change the TV channel!
I LOVE shopping at Walmart! Sam Walton only sells goods made in America!
|by Anonymous||reply 49||05/05/2013|
My pussy stinks, and no one knows why
|by Anonymous||reply 50||05/05/2013|
"I have to confess I don't know what this is referring to. "
Not long ago one could meet and greet at the gate at the airport, I always remember meeting people as they deboarded, people even met on the Tarmac security was so much looser
|by Anonymous||reply 52||05/05/2013|
I have the hardest time trying to decipher this damn map and drive at the same time.
|by Anonymous||reply 53||05/05/2013|
Yikes! It' time to get another perm. Better call JCPenney's to schedule an appointment.
|by Anonymous||reply 54||05/05/2013|
Off topic but I will never understand posters like R52 who have obviously read as far as the post he quotes from but couldn't be bothered to read any further to see that the question has already been answered TWICE. Talk about a first world problem that will never go away. I guess it was on topic.
|by Anonymous||reply 55||05/05/2013|
Help me think of a clever outgoing message for my answering machine. Everyone I know has such a good message, with music or with their little kids telling you to leave your name and number. I want a good, long outgoing message, too.
|by Anonymous||reply 56||05/05/2013|
I wish I could take a picture of my tuna salad sandwich and post it on a global billboard for all to see so my friends will know what I had for lunch.
|by Anonymous||reply 57||05/05/2013|
I wonder if this pillow is really muffling the sound of this modem. Mom can never know I am up at 2am jacking off to male model newsgroups.
If I start downloading these three pics before my class starts, will they be done by the time I get back from class to jo before my roommate gets back?
|by Anonymous||reply 58||05/05/2013|
I got fucked so many times at the bathhouse this weekend, but that's not what worries me because it's not like I could get pregnant or anything! It's that I kissed so many of them and now I just hope I didn't catch a cold. I'll be so mad at myself!
|by Anonymous||reply 59||05/05/2013|
Thank god for the Pill. I'll never have to use condoms again.
|by Anonymous||reply 60||05/05/2013|
I really want a mocha flavored latte but the gas station only has regular coffee.
|by Anonymous||reply 61||05/05/2013|
Are people just not seeing the "that don't exist anymore..." part of the title of the thread? I'm looking at you r61.
|by Anonymous||reply 62||05/06/2013|
Do you know how to read? I'm betting you don't, R62.
|by Anonymous||reply 63||05/06/2013|
I can read R63, but I am totally not getting your point. Please explain.
|by Anonymous||reply 64||05/06/2013|
What a drag it is retyping my essays after I edit them with red ink, White-Out, scissors, and tape. I've already typed two drafts of this one, and now I'm on my third revision.
Oh no. I'm out of typewriter ribbon.
|by Anonymous||reply 65||05/06/2013|
r62 I was referring to the "olden days" when there were no Starbucks...and if you wanted a cup of coffee on the road you had to get the burnt crap gas station coffee. Now, even gas stations have lattes and mocha drinks, albeit shitty ones.
|by Anonymous||reply 66||05/06/2013|
I went to Musicland today to get a new album, but they didn't have the one I wanted in stock.
|by Anonymous||reply 67||05/06/2013|
But there are still plenty of gas stations that have just regular coffee or no coffee at all to make your example confusing R62. So one's ability to read or not has nothing to do with understanding your poorly chosen example.
|by Anonymous||reply 68||05/06/2013|
r61 is right. Most places I buy cofee has different kinds...
I can't wait. In 5 years What's Up Doc will be on TV...
|by Anonymous||reply 69||05/06/2013|
I loved Star Wars! I can't wait until it comes back to theaters in three years so I can see it again!
|by Anonymous||reply 70||05/06/2013|
I hate that I can't use my typewriter at night because the neighbor downstairs will complain. Changing the ribbon is a pain as well.
|by Anonymous||reply 71||05/06/2013|
It takes forever for this stupid dot matrix printer to print out my document. And every once in a while the paper jams.
And I hate peeling off those sprocket holes!
|by Anonymous||reply 72||05/06/2013|
That boy's shorts are so damn tight and short you can practically see his ass right here in the mall!
|by Anonymous||reply 73||05/06/2013|
"I want some privacy on this call, but the phone cord doesn't stretch far enough!"
has been replaced by
"I want some privacy on this call, but the government can tap my phone without a warrant!"
|by Anonymous||reply 74||05/06/2013|
I just heard part of a cool song on the radio, but I missed the name of it. How will I ever figure out what song that was?
|by Anonymous||reply 75||05/06/2013|
I dont know where that is, no worries I have a Thomas Guide. (map)
|by Anonymous||reply 76||05/06/2013|
Well will have our secretary call a messenger right over so you can get those documents by 5.
|by Anonymous||reply 77||05/06/2013|
$250 deposit for lost or un-returned porn tapes.
|by Anonymous||reply 78||05/06/2013|
The gay bars here get so crowded we better go early to stand in line before the cover charge goes up!
|by Anonymous||reply 79||05/06/2013|
If you want to hood up, here is my pager number.
|by Anonymous||reply 80||05/06/2013|
Can I have the want ads section of the news paper, I need to look for a job.
|by Anonymous||reply 81||05/06/2013|
I am going to rent a space at the swap meet so I can get rid of all my old stuff.
|by Anonymous||reply 82||05/06/2013|
Excuse me from dinner, I will be right back after I make a call from the phone booth.
|by Anonymous||reply 83||05/06/2013|
So you said this stuff is from Maui Right?
|by Anonymous||reply 84||05/06/2013|
Anyone got extra milk crates to store records?
|by Anonymous||reply 85||05/06/2013|
Way to steal a popular Internet meme and try to make it your own, OP. All of these are from "1990s Problems meme".
|by Anonymous||reply 86||05/06/2013|
We'll never get tickets to see Lady Gaga!
|by Anonymous||reply 87||05/06/2013|
R86 Here is one from the 70s. I went to fill up my gas tank but they didn't have change for a 20.
|by Anonymous||reply 88||05/06/2013|
R86, go put a tampon in your twat, and kill someone else's buzz. Copy or not, this thread is great, you tool.
|by Anonymous||reply 89||05/06/2013|
God, mum - can't you read a map???
(Now it's "Shut the FUCK UP!!! I'm in the middle of a field... There is no "In two hundred yards, turn left" I'm in the middle of a FUCKING FIELD!!!!)
|by Anonymous||reply 90||05/06/2013|
Arrgh, I just missed the best play of the game! I hope they show a replay.
btw we need to get over to Jimmie's some night to see the video he shot while on vacation.
|by Anonymous||reply 91||05/06/2013|
Ugh why did I wait until the last minute to organize this party? There's no way everyone will get these invitations on time, even if i post them today. I don't have time to call all those people individually! How can I possibly let 50 people know about this today??
|by Anonymous||reply 92||05/06/2013|
I wish there were some kind of public forum where I could make a statement, even a completely mundane statement, and then someone else would immediately say something bitchy to me. I can't imagine how this would ever work, but it would fulfill some kind of strange need I have, or maybe it's even a fetish. I'm probably the only person in the whole world who desires this, so the idea would never take off.
|by Anonymous||reply 93||05/06/2013|
[quote] The phone company is charging me extra for an unlisted number.
I still have a landline, and the phone company still charges me extra for an unlisted number.
|by Anonymous||reply 94||05/06/2013|
Fun premise, OP. I was watching some 80's movies over the weekend and loved how people had to get their messages from their answering machines. No cellphones or texting at the parties. Computers had 7 MB of RAM!!
|by Anonymous||reply 95||05/06/2013|
What's even sadder is that some low-rent movies today still use an answering machine as a plot device, as if anyone, even your grandparents, has had one in the last decade.
|by Anonymous||reply 96||05/06/2013|
My parents still have an answering machine (and a land line).
|by Anonymous||reply 97||05/06/2013|
I hate going to my relatives house ... they always break out their slides, forcing us to watch a slide show of all the pictures they took on vacation...
|by Anonymous||reply 98||05/06/2013|
My mother-in-law begins every voicemail message with "If you're there, pick up..."
|by Anonymous||reply 99||05/06/2013|
I really need to get this garden club newsletter out but my office is all out of stencils for the mimeograph.
|by Anonymous||reply 100||05/06/2013|
I really can't wait to see the new Rick Astley video but MTV is doing a Madonnathon.
|by Anonymous||reply 101||05/06/2013|
Bravo R89 - will you also beat up r19 and r62? I agree this is an awesome thread and those two are either too young to know what we're talking about or they're little buzzkill assholes or both.
|by Anonymous||reply 102||05/06/2013|
And speaking of gas stations, isn't it annoying to have to wait for the attendant to pump your gas? I'd rather do it myself.
|by Anonymous||reply 103||05/06/2013|
Wouldn't you know that my partner's parents chose to visit us right in the middle of the movie I've been waiting for weeks to see? Now I'll never know how it ends!
|by Anonymous||reply 104||05/06/2013|
I love genealogy. Just this morning I sent requests for birth certificates to nine different states since I don't know what state great-great-great-grandpa was born in. Sure, it's expensive, and sure, the wait might be up to three months, but it's worth it!
|by Anonymous||reply 105||05/06/2013|
AAA didn't get us our triptiks in time, so we have no idea how to drive to Florida.
|by Anonymous||reply 106||05/06/2013|
"I'm really looking forward to that double feature tonight, we're seeing Jaws and One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest!"
|by Anonymous||reply 107||05/06/2013|
I'm going to miss the opening sketch at the start of the show if the tv doesn't warm up any faster!
|by Anonymous||reply 109||05/06/2013|
Why is everyone on the planet using styrofoam coffee cups?
|by Anonymous||reply 110||05/06/2013|
I'm a horny teenager who wishes I could rub one out to some hot mansex. I'm too young to go to the dirty bookstore, so I have to make do with scrambled straight softcore on The Playboy Channel. (The sound comes in fine, though!)
|by Anonymous||reply 111||05/06/2013|
I gotta go right now, my favorite TV show is coming on and I can't miss it! EVERYONE will be talking about it at the office tomorrow. No one watches whatever airs on the other 3 channels in that timeslot.
|by Anonymous||reply 112||05/06/2013|
We're planning a vacation, can anyone recommend a good travel agent?
|by Anonymous||reply 113||05/06/2013|
I love reading the news in the morning, but I hate the ink all over my hands!
|by Anonymous||reply 114||05/06/2013|
$60 for a Falcon video on VHS? It's a lot of money but you get to keep the tape forever, so it's worth it. How else will I view porn at home? I'm far too embarrassed to enter that curtained-off room at the back of the video rental place.
|by Anonymous||reply 116||05/06/2013|
I had to call my dad on his cell phone and now he's pissed that he'll be charged for the call!
|by Anonymous||reply 117||05/06/2013|
Or as I would have said in 1993- "shit, that made me laugh out loud"
|by Anonymous||reply 118||05/06/2013|
I feel so guilty for shelling out thousands of dollars for a 20 MB hard drive. I mean, my god, I'll never fill that thing!
|by Anonymous||reply 119||05/06/2013|
The annoying thing about backpacking around Europe is keeping track and converting all these currencies
|by Anonymous||reply 120||05/06/2013|
Another bad thing about backpacking all over Europe is having to make the trip to the Post Restante counter at the GPO to get my mail. Oh well. At least I get to find out what's happening back home.
|by Anonymous||reply 121||05/06/2013|
My dish set is almost all complete! Just two more visits to the Shell Station!
|by Anonymous||reply 122||05/06/2013|
Oh no, I lost one of the pages from my IATA issued airline ticket! Hopefully the ticket agent at the airport will take pity on me and let me board the flight, even if she has to put me in the smoking section.
|by Anonymous||reply 123||05/07/2013|
I'm going away on vacation next week, so I won't be reachable by email. If its an emergency, the call the hotel at... ...otherwise, I'll see you when I get back!
|by Anonymous||reply 124||05/07/2013|
[quote]That boy's shorts are so damn tight and short you can practically see his ass right here in the mall!
Here's the visual for r73.
|by Anonymous||reply 125||05/07/2013|
Honey, would you get me a few bottles of scotch from the hotel mini-bar?
|by Anonymous||reply 126||05/07/2013|
Huh? I stayed in a hotel with a minibar last month.
|by Anonymous||reply 127||05/07/2013|
Operator, I'd like to make a collect call.
|by Anonymous||reply 128||05/07/2013|
Where did you stay, R127? I travel a lot in the US and stay in Hilton, Marriott and Holiday Inn chain hotels. Most have refrigerators but they are empty. I can't remember the last time I stayed in a hotel with small bottles of liquor or candy and nuts in the room.
|by Anonymous||reply 129||05/07/2013|
R129 They have them in fancy hotels. But now most of them are set up so that once you remove the bottle you are charged for it. Even if you pick it up and put it back. If the weight is dislodged it is counted as used.
|by Anonymous||reply 130||05/07/2013|
My pussy smells so fresh!
|by Anonymous||reply 131||05/07/2013|
I can't decide which newspaper to subscribe to, so I just subscribed to both of them.
|by Anonymous||reply 132||05/07/2013|
Just put that copy of Newsweek on the coffee table with Look, Life, the Saturday Evening Post and McCall's
it's almost time for the national news on television ...
|by Anonymous||reply 134||05/07/2013|
Damn! I forgot to bring newspaper with movie times...
|by Anonymous||reply 135||05/08/2013|
We'll mail you a form to fill out in triplicate. You keep the yellow copy and mail the other two copies back to us. Please remove the carbon paper before you put the pink and white copies back in the mail to us. Once we receive your application we'll process it within 5-7 business days. Then you can expect your replacement card in the mail in three more days.
|by Anonymous||reply 136||05/08/2013|
I miss my big brandy sniffer full of trick's names and numbers!
|by Anonymous||reply 137||05/08/2013|
My partner and I can't decide whether we should have the wedding here in San Francisco with my family, or in Los Angeles with his family.
|by Anonymous||reply 138||05/08/2013|
I don't get R138's post in the context of this thread...
(unless it's a Prop 8 reference, which means that it's a problem that will exist again in a few months, so I'm not sure it counts)
|by Anonymous||reply 139||05/08/2013|
R139: bingo, and I hope you are correct.
|by Anonymous||reply 140||05/08/2013|
I hope we come to a gas station soon so we can ask for directions.
|by Anonymous||reply 141||05/08/2013|
I am another person who still has a landline and my landline phone has an answering machine built in. My landline is cable though, so if the cable and/or electricity goes out, I don't have phone access.
I love my main landline phone. It's a Panasonic from either the late 90s or early 00s and it's awesome. Great volume, very intuitive way of storing phone numbers. I've bought extension phones by Panasonic and other companies ysince then and they all suck
|by Anonymous||reply 142||05/08/2013|
Damn. The phone stopped ringing before I answered it. I wish there was a way to find out who it was!
|by Anonymous||reply 143||05/08/2013|
I wonder what the butcher shop has on special today.
|by Anonymous||reply 144||05/08/2013|
Don't butcher shops exist where you live r144?
|by Anonymous||reply 145||05/09/2013|
I hate having to hold my cassette recorder up to the radio speaker so I can tape the new Madonna single...and then the DJ talks over the song.
|by Anonymous||reply 146||05/09/2013|
Can't wait for that movie to be released on laserdisc!!
|by Anonymous||reply 147||05/09/2013|
I can't remember all my friend's phone numbers! And I lost the piece of paper I scribbled down all the numbers on!
|by Anonymous||reply 148||05/09/2013|
I sure wish I could throw some birds and some pigs and not have the ASPCA all up in my grille...
|by Anonymous||reply 149||05/23/2013|
The Yellow Pages/White Pages are so HEAVY!
|by Anonymous||reply 150||08/02/2013|
I miss "E" Tickets
Disneyland has been going downhill since they got rid of them.
|by Anonymous||reply 152||08/06/2013|
I missed "The Wizard of Oz" last night. Now I'll have to wait a whole year for it to be on TV again!
|by Anonymous||reply 153||08/08/2013|
I can't believe there are still places in New York Fucking City that don't take debit cards! Who the fuck carries more than $20 in cash anymore?
|by Anonymous||reply 154||08/08/2013|
When will I ever really master the art of dialling with a pencil?
|by Anonymous||reply 155||08/08/2013|