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‘I’m Gay and Saving Sex ‘Till Marriage; Here’s Why’

Does anybody else think that this is just sad?

by Anonymousreply 1204/19/2013

Constantino Diaz-Duran backpacked across the USA and didn't cottage?

Could it be that he looks like Kevin Spacey's older brother?

by Anonymousreply 104/18/2013

"I know what you’re thinking, and you’re right. It’s very hard for two healthy, athletic men with high sex drives to remain celibate."

One day this will be called The Tom Cruise Movie.

by Anonymousreply 204/18/2013

There is room for everyone. Seems like his way makes sense for him. Fine.

by Anonymousreply 304/18/2013

Meh. If that's what he wants, who are we to stop him?

by Anonymousreply 404/18/2013

[quote]I have nothing but respect for older gay couples who stuck it out despite the lack of societal recognition, but it’s fair to say that most of us don’t have the self-discipline to make it work without that extra binding tie.

THIS, R3 and R4, is why the story is about more than this dumbass's tortured confusion and pathetically misplaced, falsely grounded moralisms.

In the end he is saying that an intimate, loving relationship cannot survive without an objectifying external sanction. This sanction chains the couple, through shaming legalism, into staying together. And to him the relationship lacks integrity on its own terms - he requires the meddling, and proclaims that HE is the norm.

This is not okay. It is presumptuous, wrong-headed, and ultimately homophobic, whether he or anyone else recognizes it or not.

by Anonymousreply 504/18/2013

So when did we become such paragons of restraint, R5?

On every other marriage / relationship / sex thread two dominant themes emerge (lately I'd say they are splitting along generational lines but nonetheless)

1) monogamy is not a natural state for gay or straight men

2) all straight men would be out fucking as much as gay men if they weren't married

Those two seldom get called out as presumptuous or wrong-headed. So on that basis, his perspective is valid. Look around this site alone and you can see how he'd come to that conclusion.

by Anonymousreply 604/19/2013

[quote]on that basis, his perspective is valid.

You're making judgments about the potential for love and connection in a broad swath of humanity based on things you read on an internet message board devoted to celebrity gossip?

You sound a tad touched, r6.

The truly bitter, crazy ones here always want to punish the world based on what they don't like about posts they've read on Datalounge. Soooooooo nuts.

by Anonymousreply 704/19/2013

I'm comparing his perspective to what's found here, yes, on the basis it's an example for comparative purposes at 7:30 in the morning, yeah. You think what I cited isn't valid? Poster here are just making absolutely everything up? Why are you so threatened by debate? Why does this guy's position threaten you so much? Common sense says both of us are using reasonable facts to argue.

You don't think DL's endless debates about sex, relationships and marriage aren't packed with contentions that monogamy isn't natural and most married straight men wish they could be out there getting as much as they can wherever they can?

If not, argue it on some basis but don't have a tantrum over reality.

by Anonymousreply 804/19/2013

No. It's a personal choice that should be respected.

by Anonymousreply 904/19/2013


No one has a right to judge my or your sexual life, why is his any different?

I don't think it's sad. Odd for me I suppose, but it's his choice and he wanted to write about it; it's what writers do.

Sashay away OP. Sashay... away.

by Anonymousreply 1004/19/2013

this is what happens when you copy the sad straight world

by Anonymousreply 1104/19/2013

[quote]You think what I cited isn't valid?

That's right. It's not valid to make judgments about all gay people's potential for monogamy based on anonymous posts on an internet gossip site. Duh.

[quote]Why are you so threatened by debate?

Not threatened by debate at all. In fact, I love it. Pointing out fallacious reasoning is, in fact, one of the elements of debate I love most.

[quote]Common sense says both of us are using reasonable facts to argue.

Uh, no. Common sense says, "Any given person's potential to maintain a monogamous relationship is based, not on gender or sexual orientation, but on that person's own decisions." Outrageously generalizing supposition says, "Gay men are incapable of being monogamous!!! Datalounge says so!!!"

[quote]You don't think DL's endless debates

Internet debates are packed with everything and everyone arguing every which way. Honestly, I'm shocked you need this explained to you. And do I even need to point out: if such suppositions were not contentious, there would be no debate?

I understand the interwebs can be a bit of a shock at first, but taking it out on all gay men is fucking pathetic.

by Anonymousreply 1204/19/2013
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