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Since 1995

Gwyneth Paltrow here

It has come to my attention that you ungrateful Yank peasants in a recent poll claim to hate me. I find this hard to believe. I have shared with you all my diet,cooking and shopping tips, and great personal information about my life with Chris and our children. I even give you amusing shreds of trivia about things my dear, dear friends like Cameron Diaz, Princess Rosario of Bulgaria, and Stella McCartney do or say. Yet still this is not enough for you, somehow.

I want to know just what it is I have to do to make you ingrates worship me as your better, as is my right.

by Anonymousreply 704/19/2013

Shit bitch - what size shoe do you wear - those dogs are MASSIVE!!! With long, ugly-ass toes too. Good toenail polish can't hide everything.

by Anonymousreply 104/17/2013

You are missing the Shit-Bra, Gwinny.

by Anonymousreply 204/17/2013

Who would take advice from someone who wore this saggy titted mess?

by Anonymousreply 304/17/2013

Did you and that horse have relations in that planet collision movie?

by Anonymousreply 404/17/2013

If I'd only had a longer knitting hook...

by Anonymousreply 504/18/2013

Gwyneth, all you need to do to be worshiped is die. That's it. Just one little thing. Try to schedule it for next week

by Anonymousreply 604/18/2013

Get a decent script this time and do Sylvia Plath again.

by Anonymousreply 704/19/2013
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