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What was the shortest job you ever held?

I worked as a Production Assistant on a John Laroquette was cancelled 3 hours into my first day.

by Anonymousreply 2304/12/2013

I lasted about 5 hours at a restaurant when I was in college. I didn't say a word, just walked out in the middle of dinner.

by Anonymousreply 104/12/2013

Delivery person for a vending machine company - the truck was 106 degrees F inside the box-cab, with sodas, exploding; each case weighed 26 lbs, and I had to lug seven of them up long staircases, using a hand-truck - I now have loads more respect for those doing such a job, as I couldn't cut it. I lasted two weeks. The boss said that most newbies last two DAYS, fwiw.

by Anonymousreply 204/12/2013

I worked in a public school for a month and quit. I hated the beurocracy and the lack of professionalism.

by Anonymousreply 304/12/2013

I lasted one day at a temp job that had me working a sample sale for Dolce and Gabbana (it was supposed to be one week). Horrible experience. Every single person was an asshole, from the D&G people to the customers. It was a 16 hour day and they allowed us one 30 minute break. If they caught two of the temp staff speaking to eachother for even a moment, we were reprimanded. The whole vibe just sucked, and I've never seen such a group of arrogant, self absorbed people in my life. It was absolutely ridiculous. When I left, I called my temp agency and told them there were no way I was going back there. They said they were surprised about my experience because they had that assignment in previous years with no complaints at all. They called me back later to say they had gotten five other complaints from temps who were also not returning; it turns out there had been some kind of management change over that past year. Thinking back on it, I'm sure they were left in quite a bind, and I'm glad.

by Anonymousreply 404/12/2013

In college I got a summer job going door to door soliciting contributions to an environmental lobbying organization. We were supposed to be paid from a percentage of the amount of money we collected. We canvassed a fairly poor neighborhood, so nobody had any money, and it was almost 100F outside. Fuck that. I did it one day and never went back.

by Anonymousreply 504/12/2013

I was "hired" for BON APPETIT over a Noon lunch and "unhired" in a three-thirty phone call!

by Anonymousreply 604/12/2013

I worked for, I think, three days making telemarketing calls for Olan Mills.

by Anonymousreply 704/12/2013

DL webmaster

by Anonymousreply 804/12/2013

Worked 1 Sunday game at concession stand. 6 hours in the heat serving beer to drunk fans. I love my team but that's it for me.

by Anonymousreply 904/12/2013

Circus tossing midget.

by Anonymousreply 1004/12/2013

I left after the training video at Burger King.

by Anonymousreply 1104/12/2013

I lasted one day as an office temp at a huge Hollywood law firm. I was set up for failure as they needed an inveterate paralegal who could decipher legal shorthand on documents. Something I was not. I still don't know why the temp agency sent me there. Nothing on my resume at the time was even remotely legal-related.

When I walked into the firm the day I started everyone was super-friendly. By the time I walked out at the end of the day people were literally scowling at me. I did get to see contracts for big movie stars like Bruce Willis. Blew my fucking mind.

by Anonymousreply 1204/12/2013

I was hired at a travel agency. My first caller was a cruise booking! I was so excited but very green. The customer knew exactly what he wanted, the boat, what deck, even the stateroom. Simple booking. I was confused about how to go about it. The client got impatient and asked me for the cruise line's number. He'd do it himself. I said, "Oh okay, great" and gave it to him. The owner came back from lunch, asked me what happened, and fired me on the spot.

by Anonymousreply 1304/12/2013

I lasted one shift at a hotel restaurant. We were forbidden to speak to the chefs and anyone senior was either sir or ma'am. I stayed for the staff dinner then left.

by Anonymousreply 1404/12/2013

I was being paid $4 for a Blow Job. I quit half way through cause I could smell his taint.

by Anonymousreply 1504/12/2013

4 hours (not including training sessions). I had applied for a bunch of summer jobs. The job I really wanted was at an arcade on the boardwalk, but the only place that called me back was Macy's. I didnt want to work at Macy's. I was 18 years old, the last place in the world I wanted to be was in some stuffy boring department store in a mall. When I went on break, I called the arcade, hoping to get word as to when they would be hiring again. I was surprised when the guy who answered asked me then and there when could I start. I told him that night. He laughed and said for me to come in tomorrow morning at 9am. I went up to my manager at Macy's and told them another job offer came through and I was going to take it. He got all pissy and bitchy (you know the type) and said before I left I had to do an exit interview and could I please finish my shift. I said sure, no problem but in my head I was thinking, "fuck that shit." I walked right out the door and never looked back, never returned the calls HR kept making to my house.

The arcade was the best job ever. I got to play video games when it was slow, listen to cool music and smoke pot in the restroom. It was the perfect place for someone my age to work.

by Anonymousreply 1604/12/2013

I was a poor grad student at the University of Hawaii, and answered an ad as a greeter for a tour company. I didn't realize until the interview that one of the requirements was that the applicant speak fluent Japanese

All I needed to do was put a lei over the tourist's head and say "Aloha, Ohayou gozaimasu (Good morning)." It all went well until someone asked me a question. Busted.

by Anonymousreply 1704/12/2013

R10 - were you the tosser or being tossed? I have always wanted to go a good old fashioned midget tossing.

by Anonymousreply 1804/12/2013

Temp job, about an hour. I was supposed to straighten these file drawers at a law office, then file a stack of neglected paperwork. But I opened these drawers and it looked like the Tasmanian Devil had twirled through there. I made a half-hearted attempt, then just grabbed my backpack and told the receptionist I was leaving. She was literally filing her nails, and sneered "Okay".

I think she was the daughter of someone there, and just thought all that icky filing was beneath her. So daddy ordered her a temp.

by Anonymousreply 1904/12/2013

R18, I'm an expert tosser but also like tossing others.

by Anonymousreply 2004/12/2013

I walked out during a break in the middle of a shift at a chain restaurant I had only worked at a couple of weeks. The place was a massive cluster-fuck but the deciding factor was whether to walk out or else wear a pin that said, "Ask Me About Our Pork Chops."

by Anonymousreply 2104/12/2013


by Anonymousreply 2204/12/2013

R21 lol sorry but this is what your post reminded me of:

by Anonymousreply 2304/12/2013
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