Was I Offensive?
I posted an inane status on Facebook this afternoon (as is my eont) that said, "Does anyone know how much a recreational meth habit cost per month? I'm really tired."
Amid my usual smattering of likes and tongue-in-cheek comments, I got a message from someone that said "I really wish you'd take your status down. Meth addiction makes me really sad." I asked if they were serious and they said completely, and that they knew a handful of current and former meth addicts and it wasn't anything to joke about. I responded that I had little sympathy for people who willingly tried meth and joking about it wasn't like joking about cancer or even alcoholism. He responded he was disappointed in me and we ended the conversation.
I'm taking this to the DL: would you be offended if someone made a casual joke about meth or was this person over-reacting? It was a polite enough conversation, but I'm still irritated someone asked me to censor myself on my own page.
|by Anonymous||reply 77||04/03/2013|
It was a joke. Some people have no sense of humor. Unfriend.
|by Anonymous||reply 1||04/02/2013|
She's over the top but so are you.
Let it go.
|by Anonymous||reply 2||04/02/2013|
Don't know about others. But I'd unfriend you.
|by Anonymous||reply 3||04/02/2013|
It is obvious you were joking. A lot of people joke about meth.
|by Anonymous||reply 4||04/02/2013|
You offend me, OP. I wouldn't shoot you over it, but I'd definitely unfriend you. For you are no friend.
|by Anonymous||reply 5||04/02/2013|
I wouldn't be so much offended but would think you were an idiot, and would be embarrassed for any of my friends to see I was friends with an idiot.
|by Anonymous||reply 6||04/02/2013|
I had a friend that always joked about a "meth diet" to lose weight. Not that funny..
|by Anonymous||reply 7||04/02/2013|
Then R3 and R5 explain why you're offended, please. I'm genuinely curious. In my mind, if you're even somewhat young you know the risks of meth, and if you choose to try it anyway you're just stupid.
I'm not racist, misogynist, classist, sizeist...but are you seriously accusing me of being insensitive to drug users? Come on.
|by Anonymous||reply 8||04/02/2013|
Meth is an evil drug and some are simply unable to stop using it. Meth is everywhere, even places you would not suspect. My neighborhood is full of meth users.
|by Anonymous||reply 9||04/02/2013|
People who scream offense all the time are the offensive ones.
|by Anonymous||reply 10||04/02/2013|
I'm only offended at how lame your sense of humor is.
|by Anonymous||reply 11||04/02/2013|
[quote]I responded that I had little sympathy for people who willingly tried meth
^ This part, OP.
I started taking speed -- not always meth -- when I was 17. I didn't stop until I was 23.
IOW, take your "little sympathy" and stuff it up your dick.
|by Anonymous||reply 12||04/02/2013|
[quote] In my mind, if you're even somewhat young you know the risks of meth, and if you choose to try it anyway you're just stupid.
Among the people who are addicted to meth, OP, are homeless kids who were kicked out of home for being gay or lesbian.
|by Anonymous||reply 13||04/02/2013|
I wouldn't be offended that you'd post that. I am offended that you'd then repeat the story on here. Anyone who takes anything that happens on Facebook that seriously has issues.
|by Anonymous||reply 14||04/02/2013|
Yeah, your joke was ok. He was being the offensive one, until you said the bit that R12 quoted, then it was kind of equal.
|by Anonymous||reply 15||04/02/2013|
I'm R1 but I would never be cavalier about someone's suffering. Nor arrogant enough to think that something like that couldn't happen to me. Your post at R8 shows you to be a lunkhead.
|by Anonymous||reply 16||04/02/2013|
It didn't have to be offensive, but your follow-up reasoning made it so. Most likely because you're a fool.
|by Anonymous||reply 18||04/02/2013|
It is quite funny, actually. It says more about people who can't see the joke. Take themselves too seriously AND come from trashy backgrounds.
You may want to look into getting yourself some Adderall and some B vitamins. Green tea gives a methy kick. You were just explaining that you feel tired is all.
My husband's family complains about the insensitive things I say in a joking manner. I'm always shocked but then I have to remember that this family has suffered with a crackhead father who did a lot of time in prison. The mother is a tawdry whore who had kids with three different fathers. Dysfunction all around. This is why my family balked at me marrying down. My husband is successful and decent but I always have to be on guard about what I say because they weren't fortunate to come from a decent, upstanding family. I just don't get their issues.
|by Anonymous||reply 19||04/02/2013|
First, let me apologize for responding too hastily and not explaining my point well at all. I do come across as a dick in the above post. For that, I'm sorry.
I have every sympathy and a lot of compassion for homeless kids, abused individuals, and children of poverty who've been forced into meth situations they can't control. I work with those kids in a low-income school, and their situation is heartbreaking. Meth is an insidious cycle, and I wouldn't wish addiction on anyone.
That said, the friend in question and I are close. We grew up in the same time, knew the same friends, and had basically the same life experiences. We are lower middle class, but not children of abject poverty, and neither were the addicts he claims to know. They're either middle class kids like us who tried it for fun or wealthy 20-somethings who got bored with cocaine. And those are the people for whom I have no sympathy--people who had control over their environment and actions, who were fully aware of how destructive the drug is. and who just did meth anyway for a thrill. That is a choice i cannot forgive (especially in light of the people around them who had no choice), and this is why I don't get his horror and the sanctimony.
I live in a flyover state you routinely mock and which boasts the highest rate of meth consumption and production in the US. I also work in a Title I school in a poor rural part of that state, so meth is part of the daily culture of the people, as mucj as NASCAR and Duck Dynasty. We work by methheads, live by meth labs, and care for the children they've abandoned due to their habit. I'm not saying it excuses a joke on their behalf, but it explains why I don't handle the subject with kid gloves, either.
I guess I just don't get the pearl clutching and the assumption that it's okay to tell someone to censor themselves because you're personally offended. I just hide or defriend people who piss me off.
I will agree with R11 though: definitely not my finest work.
Thanks for your honest input, everyone.
|by Anonymous||reply 20||04/02/2013|
This is why They hate us.
|by Anonymous||reply 21||04/02/2013|
OP, I think it's funny and edgy, and any meth users/sufferers who don't see the deathly folly of their own actions needs to grow up. Oh, and the "you offend me" control freaks should just drop dead from umbrage.
|by Anonymous||reply 22||04/02/2013|
I've been on the meth train (for 2 years) and off for years now - I quit on my own after realizing this was not the path I wanted to pursue. You can quit. Having gone through it, I have to say i would have laughed. People are way to goddamned serious these days.
|by Anonymous||reply 23||04/02/2013|
Why don't you send them all this funny youtube video....might help so your friends can see there are FAR worse things than making a joke about meth addicts.
|by Anonymous||reply 24||04/02/2013|
OMG you all are so prickly and prissy and touchy and humorless.
Don't tell me there are 700 meth jokes an hour on TV all day long.
Wow, and yet you all have NO PROBLEM saying unbelievably vile things about women and women's bodies. DL is an endless festival of your contempt for women. And that bothers no one.
But some little lame joke about drugs. . .
The worst thing you did, OP, was say "cost" when you should have said "costs." Google the words "noun-verb agreement" and educate yourself.
|by Anonymous||reply 25||04/02/2013|
Oh, R25, that was a smartphone typo. I'll flagellate accordingly for not proofreading more carefully, though.
|by Anonymous||reply 27||04/02/2013|
OP i would not give a shit. you can make a joke about whatever you like on YOUR wall..
|by Anonymous||reply 28||04/02/2013|
"Don't tell me there are" = "Don't tell me there aren't," oops, typo
|by Anonymous||reply 29||04/02/2013|
There are few groups of people more humorless than addicts and recovering addicts.
After fucking up their lives, their need to foist their sobriety on others, declaring their resolve and being incredibly pompous about having achieved their little collectible coins.
Obviously, from the plethora of drug and alcohol-related threads here, this website's devotees are legion with boozers and users, each one more of a dullard than the next.
|by Anonymous||reply 31||04/02/2013|
I repeat: And yet they have no problem saying vile and demeaning things about women.
|by Anonymous||reply 32||04/02/2013|
Seems you belong to one of the "few," R31.
|by Anonymous||reply 34||04/02/2013|
And you seem to be a presumptuous, bitter, ankle-biting cunt who's palpably stung at being so easily typified.
|by Anonymous||reply 35||04/02/2013|
Um, you're the one who seems to be a little stung, R35. LOL.
|by Anonymous||reply 36||04/02/2013|
You're the one laughing, aloud and alone, in your dark sad little room.
Have another snort, addict.
|by Anonymous||reply 37||04/02/2013|
Yes, I'm laughing, but you're the one losing his shit.
And I'm not an addict, but you sound like one.
|by Anonymous||reply 38||04/02/2013|
Girls, girls, you're both addicts!
|by Anonymous||reply 39||04/02/2013|
Its the same as how some people make crack jokes.
|by Anonymous||reply 40||04/02/2013|
You're a snide little presumptuous twit, oh and a scat fetishist, too? How odd. what a sad perverted life you have; attacking complete strangers.
Now you have voices in your head telling you what words typed on a screen 'sound' like, addict?
How sad. Seek help.
|by Anonymous||reply 41||04/02/2013|
The mistake was answering, op. you should have never acknowledged the reply.
|by Anonymous||reply 42||04/02/2013|
I thought it was kinda witty
|by Anonymous||reply 43||04/02/2013|
But re-read your posts, R41.
You called me an addict with absolutely no provocation. In your follow up posts it's like you're talking to yourself.
You're a mess. Feeling sorry for you now.
|by Anonymous||reply 45||04/02/2013|
God I hate when people need validation of their Facebook posts. You need anonymous strangers to validate an online exchange?!!!
Have people really lost the ability to interact face to face? How sad for humanity.
|by Anonymous||reply 46||04/02/2013|
[quote]Green tea gives a methy kick.
Does it? I drink it every day, but not once has it kept me awake all night.
|by Anonymous||reply 47||04/02/2013|
My nephew makes inane, offensive "jokes" like this. I just shake my head in pity.
|by Anonymous||reply 48||04/02/2013|
R46, I wasn't asking for validation. I was seriously asking, "Was I a dick or not, and why?"
I figured if you cunts would weigh in on it I'd get the truth, one way or the other.
|by Anonymous||reply 49||04/02/2013|
This is why I don't do Facebook...too much drama.
|by Anonymous||reply 50||04/02/2013|
No, you weren't. I probably wouldn't make that particular joke but I have asked if people are high when they say ridiculous things, as I'm sure many of us have. I used to drink way too much and have done many drugs years ago and really don't care if people say things about being drunk or high. Most of my ex addict friends don't.
|by Anonymous||reply 51||04/02/2013|
It's almost as funny as those overworked prison rape jokes.
|by Anonymous||reply 52||04/02/2013|
It was a joke about meth.
No problem. To hell with any fool stupid enough to start it and then expect sympathy because they're a drug addled fool.
Sorry, I know it's hard, but everybody knows drugs are junk. You play with them, that's your funeral.
Idiots do drugs.
|by Anonymous||reply 53||04/02/2013|
Welcome to R45's sad little world; projection, denial, and an obvious addiction to harassing complete strangers.
|by Anonymous||reply 54||04/02/2013|
Insensitive- yes, stupid- yes. If you were already my friend I probably could overlook it. If I did not know you (and hopefully know better of you) I would turn away from you. Meth, along with alcohol has killed and ruined the lives of too many people I know over the years.
|by Anonymous||reply 55||04/02/2013|
I like to go for a artisan type pizZA with organyic cheeses and pest aND tapinade I like real ground up anis sausage with seeds that you bit in to I really don;t like the balls of sausdagee, more the ground up texture I also don't like to much cheese, sometimes the Jarlsbourg low fat cheese is real good on pizza , but it is hard to find because itso high end, but damn that suff is good. I remember going to Dominics pizza in Wilmongon when i was a kin, I think it was on Avalon blvd, sort of in the "hood", but they msausauge made the best sausage pizza and i always ordered the salad to go along with it, it was romaine with tons and I do mean tons of grated Parmesan cheese. I loved it so much it's been years since Ive been back to the hood, but damn I yearn for it. ....for bbq there was LOVES, not sure if it was in wilmington or compton, but damn that shit was good.
|by Anonymous||reply 56||04/02/2013|
OP, I think you used very poor judgment.
There is nothing humorous about meth addiction.
|by Anonymous||reply 58||04/02/2013|
I think taking meth makes your hair grow.
|by Anonymous||reply 60||04/02/2013|
OP, on a good day like today, I would find your FB post mildly amusing. On a bad day, it would cut into tender parts.
Two of my siblings are seemingly lost to meth, and one developed drug-onset schizophrenia suddenly last year. The anguish and powerlessness we experience over these people we love, not to mention heartbreak, can leave us a bit humorless. It's because of what we go through year after year that it stings so much.
But here's some info you should have: my doctor told me there is (for lack of better word) a deficiency in the brain that is inherited from one or both parents that strongly predisposes people toward addiction. I'm pretty sure all addicts have this deficiency.
Actually, these deficiencies (whether addiction or mental illness) can have the switch flipped if you get your pee tested by NeuroScience and they come up with the precise formulation you need (my doctor told me this, and it has to be done through a doc). But it's ungodly expensive and doesn't heal the deficiency, only manages it very well. So it's out of reach for most people.
My several siblings and myself struggle with addiction, even though we aren't each attracted to the same drug. The way addiction rends you and throws you around like a ragdoll, leaving you with the overwhelming sense that you're a loser and failure is nothing funny. It's hard to cope with. I'm only lucky my addictions don't happen to be meth, but rather more socially acceptable ones (or at least ones I can hide better).
It doesn't matter what you know intellectually. Believe me, I know exactly what I should be doing. I try hard, and succeed sometimes, but fail a lot too. Addiction will eventually kill me if I cannot master or adequately manage it. This is depressing. I'm not offended by you, but I ask you to consider what it must be like for those with addiction, even the intelligent, educated ones. It's easy to feel a lack of compassion when you're not subject to something personally.
|by Anonymous||reply 61||04/02/2013|
Get off the cross r61, somebody needs the wood!
|by Anonymous||reply 62||04/02/2013|
But hey, OP, if you're tired all the time, try any of these:
1/ 6000 IU of liquid vitamin D daily (cheap, $8-10 a bottle).
2/ Eliminate sugar (cheap).
3/ Reduce carbs, especially wheat.
4/ Take adrenal pills. Probably something like $30-40 a month, but cheaper than meth and will actually help you get better too.
5/ Sleep more, sleep regularly.
6/ Exercise and drink plenty of water.
|by Anonymous||reply 63||04/02/2013|
R63, thanks. I actually have been experiencing a bout of insomnia recently, which is obviously causing the fatigue and the not super great Facebook posts. I wake up every night around 3:00 and can't get back to sleep until 5:00 or so. I can't figure out what's causing it.
|by Anonymous||reply 64||04/02/2013|
R63 can you please recommend a brand if Adrenal pills?
|by Anonymous||reply 65||04/02/2013|
R61, thank you for that post. R19, You are truly a cunt. OP, jokes should be funny or at least mildly amusing. That was neither.
|by Anonymous||reply 66||04/02/2013|
There's nothing wrong with the joke, OP, but some of your follow-up comments about your lack of sympathy, etc indicate a lack of real understanding of addiction. Those who are quickest to say addicts deserve what they get are, in my experience, the most ignorant when it comes to addiction and its effects. There are as many reasons for taking up illicit drugs as there are users. People have been consuming intoxicants for as long as people have been around. Prohibition does more harm than many of the drugs themselves - just because a government says a drug is bad doesn't make it true. I've been an opiate addict for 20+ years and I'm doing a hell of a lot better than my peers who are drinkers. DL has always been full of mean-hearted userphobia but that's hardly surprising given that it's populated largely by white, middle-aged queens who've likely done nothing more risky than wear a Fred Perry polo without ironing it first.
|by Anonymous||reply 67||04/02/2013|
Don't know what Amazon sells, but James L Wilson wrote a book about adrenal fatigue (a large % of people have adrenal fatigue). I get adrenal pills from my doctor. Brand is Priority One, which can only be purchased through doctors. I pay $30 a bottle and they help a lot.
James L Wilson has a line as well. Link to his product line here. You can also go through his online questionnaire to see if you have adrenal fatigue. If you have any ability to work with a doctor on it, I recommend it. If not, you can still get pills and do it yourself. Would be worth getting his book, too, which should be on Amazon - I got my copy at half.com.
|by Anonymous||reply 68||04/02/2013|
If you wake up at 3:00, you might be depressed. Do you hate your job? Hate where you live?
|by Anonymous||reply 69||04/02/2013|
Op, I thought it was funny. I also thought R61's post was funny.
You shouldn't have answered your friend's post. What you need to do now is make a passive-aggressive status update like, "Some people are too uptight!"
That will make it all better.
|by Anonymous||reply 70||04/02/2013|
If you're having trouble sleeping try some melatonin.
|by Anonymous||reply 71||04/02/2013|
OP, I'm a recovering alkie. I think it's fine. Yes, meth addiction is tragic and horrible. But a joke is just a joke.
|by Anonymous||reply 72||04/02/2013|
OP, middle of the night waking is associated with cortisol levels, plummets of important hormones. The quick answer is your body is waking you up because it NEEDS fuel. A small amount of fuel with protein / carb, like half a nut butter sandwich. You could also just have a few nuts, or have a small bowl of millet prepared for middle of the night (millet is slow to spike blood sugar and so is a better middle of the night deal). Once you have your snack, you're supposed to go right back to sleep.
I know, I know, carbs and eating in the middle of the night are horrifying ideas. But if your health is really out of whack, healing yourself has to be number one.
You're supposed to go right back to sleep after the miniature snack. You're just responding to your body's alarm, giving it what it needs and moving on. When my adrenals were really messed up, I had to keep food right by the bed so I wouldn't wake up too much. As soon as I woke, I ate snack with eyes closed and laid back down to sleep. It worked.
|by Anonymous||reply 73||04/02/2013|
I'm with r10 - it was a joke.
This is DL. We laugh at everyone. It's only acceptable if you can laugh at yourself.
|by Anonymous||reply 74||04/02/2013|
Apparently someone on here got dramatically rejected by a meth addict. Probably clung to his feet, sobbing, and was dragged across the floor.
I won't say who.
|by Anonymous||reply 75||04/03/2013|
Many years ago I was working at an entry-level job, which was crap, and the only guy I found mildly interesting in the team I sometimes joked to. And invariably my jokes involved drugs (I have never done drugs but somehow I found the idea funny).
One day he asked if we could have lunch together. I was so happy! This was so cool, I was having lunch with perhaps a future friend. And I made yet another drug joke at lunch. And then he told me that since I wouldn't stop, he would have to tell me. That he was a recovering drug addict and that he wouldn't wish that on anyone and would I stop my jokes. Which I did.
|by Anonymous||reply 76||04/03/2013|
I used to do drugs..I still do but I used to too, and this doesn't bother me at all. These people need to go to the fun AA or NA meetings where you learn to laugh at this shit.
|by Anonymous||reply 77||04/03/2013|