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Dionne Warwick BANKRUPT! Owes $10 Million Dollars and only has $25,500 in assets!

Dionne Warwick is in seriously bad financial shape.

The Grammy Award-winning singer, 72, has filed for bankruptcy in New Jersey, reports NBC.

Her publicist says the personal bankruptcy filing on March 21 was due to "negligent and gross financial mismanagement" in the late 1980s through mid-1990s, when her average monthly income was listed as $20,950.

The singing star filed in U.S. Bankruptcy Court in New Jersey, where she lives. She listed total assets of $25,500 and liabilities of more than $10.7 million in taxes owed to the Internal Revenue Service and the state of California, according to the filing.

Her rep says the back taxes had already been paid, but penalties and interest have continued to accrue, despite the singer offering various repayment options.

Whitney Houston's cousin is best known for songs including Alfie, Do You Know the Way to San Jose and Walk on By.

by Anonymousreply 9708/03/2013

Too bad she can't donate those nostrils to coke addicts!

by Anonymousreply 103/26/2013

Awaiting confirmation of this most scurrilous rumor from Miss Warwick herself.

*Broke-azz bitch. Hee!*

by Anonymousreply 203/26/2013

Zero sympathy.

by Anonymousreply 303/26/2013

The Psychic Hotline couldn't help her?

by Anonymousreply 403/26/2013

Miss Warwick is a regular here at DataLounge, I'm sure we can expect a comment from her soon that'll put an end to this gossip.

by Anonymousreply 503/26/2013

Did she count the 40 million dollars in cash she has in a safe deposit box? Or the other 20 million dollars she has in the name of relatives?

Or the fact two of her dogs are worth more than a million a piece?

by Anonymousreply 603/26/2013

RE 6 What ? Please explain

by Anonymousreply 703/26/2013

Hussy, please!

by Anonymousreply 803/26/2013

Pay up!

by Anonymousreply 903/26/2013

Drug habit. I'm surprised she didn't call for Whitney to be cremated so she could snort her.

by Anonymousreply 1003/26/2013

On next year's Celebrity Apprentice, she can be her own charity.

by Anonymousreply 1103/26/2013

Doesn't she have homes in both LA and Brazil? Maybe she should sell one of them.

by Anonymousreply 1203/26/2013

Oh, poor, poor rich girl who didn't stay withing her spending allowance.

It's funny when things like this and goopy's '$850 clothing items are a steal' come up. Don't they know the majority of people / fans will be so turned off by their ability to buy one clothing item that is the same price as many people's rent? It's a slap in the face to all the working stiffs who haven't worked in quite some time now. Right now is not the time to flaunt one's wealth (and especially not one's squandering of wealth).

by Anonymousreply 1303/26/2013

Relax, fans. You know that my life is a never-ending swirl of drama and excitement. I know your love is stronger than the universe, and that no amount of cheap asshole tabloid gossip or IRS notifications with ugly men pounding on my door in Rio can change your knowledge that I AM INTREPID and not to be fucked with. You've heard it all before and that's why I sing about Dayjha View.

I was just doing my semi-decade balancing of my checkbook and noticed that I had been using my overdrafts a little much, and snapped my fingers to make the government see things my way so I can get a little flexibility back. So I don't have to keep stealing those dented cans of tuna at Aldi's and shit. I have ordered a hit on my financial managers but Lupella says I'll never touch her because they're gonna want cash up front. Hm.

My new boyfriend - yes, I am seriously dating but keep it a secret please because so much of my allure is tied to my - uh - availability - is a sultan or something equally highfalutin and will be distributing rubies to my creditors once my virginity has been tested and his mother approves (the old twat - she wears one of those portable sweatlodges those Muslim women wear and occasionally when she happens to lift it over her ankle it smells like the Krey feedlot). I may be converting to I-slam but ain't NOBODY gonna take me off my Jesus. And those people do believe in Jesus, too, you know. Probably more than those MORmONS who want their money back for that temple opening I did for them in Tulsa and now they have it closed down and locked up because some demon took possession of the place and they blame me for my Special Oklahoma City Bombe Blend incense and inhaler medication drawing him out of the depths of the pit.

I got the idea from Janet J. Those sahibabbas and Shakes (Chics?) and Vassieres and all those rich sweaty fat oil Arabs just love the American Celebrity Movement. They hear I had me some Solid Gold Dancers (these fuckers are so literal) and get cedarwood just at the thought. But reclaiming my virginity for the test is a little bit of an issue. I have Cindi working with a harpoon and some barracuda-strength fish line to do some nip&tucking but the stuff just melts and fizzes when I pee. (I GOT to get that tested. When I got time.) But once I figure out how to streamline the entrance to my Lady Carlsbad we'll get on to the nuptials.

So until then, my fans, you may hear some viscous rumors. Re and Gladys are still all up at me for my triumph in Rome, and are spreading shit across the land like a herd of bison.

And technically my dogs are down as adopted children dependents in my taxes and no one can touch them.

OUCH!!!!! Watch the fuck with that sewing, bitch!

by Anonymousreply 1403/26/2013

I remember years ago, seeing her in some Southwest-decor'ed Palm Springs condo she 'co-owned' with some designer queen, on an HGTV show. It seemed so passé, even then, and I remember thinking 'doesn't this woman have more money than this ?' Guess not, hussy.

by Anonymousreply 1503/26/2013

We totally saw this coming.

by Anonymousreply 1603/26/2013

I think R6 is being sarcastic. What he's trying to say is there's a difference between being poor and being poor for the purpose of going bankrupt.

In other words, it's easy to hide assets.

by Anonymousreply 1703/26/2013

Miss Dionne reportedly only has one thousand in cash to her name.

This woman has toured practically every year for fifty years. How is she not making any money?

by Anonymousreply 1803/26/2013

Right before they buried Whitney, Warwick pulled Houston's body from the casket and replaced it with her jewelry, her awards, gold coins and some bills.

Nippy ended up in a Hefty cinch-sack with odor control tossed up on the Funeral Home roof.

by Anonymousreply 1903/26/2013

How dare you hussies discuss my private business! The good Lord will judge you all

by Anonymousreply 2003/26/2013

She's had comebacks before. Maybe she can rope some musical friends into supporting her in a comeback album. I'm sure Ke$ha, Nikki Minaj, Lady GaGa, Justin Beiber and Take One would champ at the bit to duet with the first lady of adult contemporary pop the way others did with Tony Bennett.

by Anonymousreply 2103/26/2013

After all the AIDS charities she ripped off, this is a very nice end.

by Anonymousreply 2203/26/2013

Remember her bogus AIDS charity that was busted? She's not allowed to practice it anymore.

by Anonymousreply 2303/26/2013

She should go to Nippy's child for a loan. What's with these nig nag celebrities who don't pay their taxes? If she has a publicist, she certainly has an accountant. Unless she uses turbo tax. Raid her homes and look for the lock boxes full of cash. Then throw her ass in the slammer like Wesley. She should have used her psychic powers to see this coming.

by Anonymousreply 2403/26/2013

"Diva," my ass!

"Broke ass" Is more like it!

by Anonymousreply 2503/26/2013

I remember Miss Warlock stating haughtily in an interview, regarding that AIDS charity scandal: "And. I. Always. Travel. First. Class."

From Wiki:

"In 1993, on ABC's Day One, a primetime news magazine hosted by Forrest Sawyer, claimed that Dionne Warwick had managed to pass on only $56,000 from $2.1 million her Warwick Foundation had raised for AIDS charities from an extravagant benefit concert, That's What Friends Are For: AIDS Concert '88, held June 12, 1988 at The Kennedy Center in Washington D.C.

This never made it to court, and Warwick vigorously disputed the figures. When asked about it, she explained: "If you're going to give your time, then make it comfortable for me, you know?" She said she needed a limousine and a two-bedroom hotel suite, and she didn't want anyone next to her on the plane."

by Anonymousreply 2603/26/2013


by Anonymousreply 2703/26/2013

[quote]Miss Dionne reportedly only has one thousand in cash to her name.

Bitch still has more than me.

by Anonymousreply 2803/26/2013

I tried to warn her. Saw it coming months and months ago.

by Anonymousreply 2903/26/2013

I imagine her label can just issue a greatest hits box set and she'll recoup those millions easily.

by Anonymousreply 3003/26/2013

[quote] I imagine her label can just issue a greatest hits box set and she'll recoup those millions easily.

Really? Did she WRITE any of those "greatest hits?" Because if she didn't she stands to earn nothing. Only her record label would make any money.

by Anonymousreply 3103/26/2013

R1, what a shitty thing to say.

by Anonymousreply 3203/26/2013

And who would buy her music now?

by Anonymousreply 3303/26/2013

Damn, I gotta sign up for another season of The Apprentice!

by Anonymousreply 3403/26/2013

She's been broke for decades. Partly because she is a nasty diva who treats people like shit.

I respect Gladys Knight for getting her life back on track after she was in a similar position. I think Aretha is broke, too. I'm sure Patti LaBelle is barely hanging on these days.

by Anonymousreply 3503/26/2013

[quote]And who would buy her music now?

I have to admit that I would.

by Anonymousreply 3603/26/2013

You don't make money from CD.

It is touring and merchandise, that is where the big money is for any artist.

by Anonymousreply 3703/26/2013

How about this, before you judge someone (and rather viciously I might add) you should walk a mile in her shoes.

I've never read such filthy and ignorant comments. Didn't anyone teach you to respect your elders? This is how you treat someone who has been giving love all across the world for fifty three years?

by Anonymousreply 3803/26/2013

Don't make ME over, bitch!!

by Anonymousreply 3903/26/2013

UGly ass gorilla face bitch

by Anonymousreply 4003/26/2013

I wt pissed of when these celebrities making big bucks neglect to pay their proper share of taxes. I do. Why can't they?

by Anonymousreply 4103/26/2013

J'adore R38!

by Anonymousreply 4203/26/2013

R41, I got your number, hussy!

by Anonymousreply 4303/26/2013

My guess is that Hal David/ Burt Bachrach own the rights to all those hit songs, and she's made her living doing concerts of their songs.

by Anonymousreply 4403/26/2013

Bitch is ET's great–great aunt.

Notice the ET nose with the characteristic bullet-hole nares as a family trait.

by Anonymousreply 4503/26/2013


by Anonymousreply 4603/26/2013

Hubris, she lived as a superstar long after her record sales justified it. She was a successful pop singer who had a good run, but I'm sure in her mind she was much more.

by Anonymousreply 4703/26/2013

Here's the breakdown of her worth . . .

by Anonymousreply 4803/26/2013

Heartbreakers, all of you. But I will endure. I am the Queen of Endurance. I wore my dirty sweatshirt and a raggy ball cap on national television, walked out of contests on the show early, talked hoodoo and snorted snowcap tokaine off of his desk while the others were yammering, and Donald Trump STILL had to kiss my ass.

And if you think you can find any loot, I welcome your attempts to find it. DO YOU THINK I would have been opening the new wing on a fucking hospital in Denver Asshole of the Heights Colorado on February 13 if I had my hands close to any of my Psychic AIDS money? I got my wad so far up my cooz it's gonna take one of those gymnasium lightbulb changers on a stick to get it out.


by Anonymousreply 4903/26/2013

She's hiding her assets in her sinuses. You could drive a Caddie up there and not hit the sides.

by Anonymousreply 5003/26/2013

Mz Warwick,

Its Monsignor McCoo here. Sorry to use an open channel, but the satellite phone don't work here in the sub-basement of the Vatican Bank. I got the special know-you-what stashed away like you asked. No one will find it. Like you said, better than the Swiss banks.

I'm off to meet you in the secret location, bless you my child...

by Anonymousreply 5103/26/2013

Baby, that lobotomy has done wonders for your mood. You are my sweet thang, M. McCoo.

Yessiree. Swiss Guard is way better than Swiss Banks.

In fact, I feel so good this morning (might be the Sassafras Stump TIngle Toke I picked up on my way back from the courthouse) that I think you should help yourself to a little of what you will find in that red leather trunk - the one marked #17 - DANGER." Wear gloves and for God's sake don't let any of the snakes on top of the stash in the trunk get loose - no one needs another fucking pope election. zzzzzzzz.

AND if I hear one more comment about my nostrils or the contents therein I am sending Damont with a claw hammer and a pair of pliers to do a little facial reconstruction work. I have needed those collapsed-chimney holes to BREATHE my music and provide the oomph for my renowned vocal strangth.

Enough. I got to get back to my pedicure. The sultan complained about the transfusion he needed when I cut him with what was projecting from my baby toe.

by Anonymousreply 5203/27/2013

Another broke-ass Negro thinking they can beat the system and not pay the white man taxes. Wesley Snipes, anyone? Fuck her. Stupid entitled-acting bitch. I wish she had gone to prison over the AIDS charity mishagos (sp?)

by Anonymousreply 5303/27/2013

She needs to kickstart this thing.

by Anonymousreply 5403/27/2013

R53, oh yes. OH FUCKING YES, you racist little cockroach scurrying through the cellars of the DL just waiting for a topic to pop up so you can use ANYTHING as an excuse to spread the disease of your racism.

OH FUCKING YES, you rancid insect-brained racist. It's not the Cheneys, Bushes, Trumps, JPMorgan Chases, Halliburtons and other lily-white purveyors of greed and corruption in this country that have brought death to thousands and financial ruin to millions. It's the NEGROES of the entertainment industry, of course, who are worthy of your special brand of exquisite reasoning.

If you were here with me in Rio, I would kick my 1977 stiletto pump so far up your bloated ass that I'd be polishing your shit off my toe with your tongue.

I may, like so many divas of power and wonder, have been corrupted by my success and dazzled by the loot I have acquired over a lifetime of work. But I am not so special in the way you draw out to warrant your particular white-sheeted concern. And I am not so stoned by my Mamba-Jamba Mauno Loa Delight that I do not see and smell a bug when one like you scampers by.


by Anonymousreply 5503/27/2013

Maybe she can borrow money from Madonna. It was just announced that Madonna has joined the BILLIONAIRES club, after her nearly $300 million she made in 2012 alone, which set a record for highest annual earnings by a musical performer of all time.

Prior to 2012 Madonna was worth about $700 million, so this figure put her over the top.

I can't wait until the OFFICIAL Forbes list comes out in 2 months.

by Anonymousreply 5603/27/2013

Ooooh! R53,

You got DRAGGED!

by Anonymousreply 5703/27/2013

What's it all about,

When you sort it out, Machiavelli?

Are we meant to take more than we give,

or are we meant to be kind?

(It must not be the latter, cause these DL cunts are killing me!)

by Anonymousreply 5803/27/2013

She didn't pay ANY taxes during the 90s, with millions owed to the gov't. each year? Damn. I went a couple of years without paying about $2K in taxes and they got right on me and garnished my wages as soon as I got a new job.

by Anonymousreply 5903/27/2013

No taxes in the 90s? She's a thief. The 90s is when she should've realized she isn't all that, Hal & Burt's songs were the real stars, not her. Instead she stole from the government, which is stealing from all of us.

by Anonymousreply 6003/27/2013

Miss Thing at R58, as much as I share your sentiments I must remind you that there is only one Miss Warwick, and my copyright, patent, and hoo-doo clauses will secure you from getting too carried away there, sweetie.

After all, why should anyone else be subjected to being called tired, dull, boring, too-much, and unfunny, in my name.

But love to you. Only love. Love and a nice soft silk gag on your full lips.

by Anonymousreply 6103/27/2013

Mz. Dionne,

I have packed the luggage with the cash, jewels, holy relics and various pieces of art I found in the vault. I labelled it as "Vatican Bank Money Laundering Dept" so it slipped right past the airport checkpoints no problem. What time is the Sultan's private jet coming to pick us up? We are at the airport, awaiting details. I found a cute Swiss Guard to be a new bodyguard for you!

by Anonymousreply 6203/28/2013

It couldn't happen to a cuntier cunt.

by Anonymousreply 6303/28/2013

My Dear McCoo,

Sweet one. Axually it will not be a jet. But if you can take a taxi to the Tiber under Castel Sant'Angelo there will be a guy in a canoe there at 3 am who can swoop you away towards Capri. It's a little bit of a journey and you may have to portage, but it's a full moon and I hear the light on the floating pig turds (Ah, Roma) is something to see.

It seems the sultan is having a tiny problem with a coup or something, so you need to make sure the boat guy doesn't try anything. Something about the sultan having 26 of his kids held for ransom. SOME people act desperate in a situation like that. Assholes. So be ready for axion. As we useta say in East Orange.

Then you sit tight in Capri. I'm on my way. Pitch a tent on the beach and I'll find you. I got Nippy a dolphin mask and she's gonna swim me over. She's got a lot of nerveless energy to work off.

I just got settled in back here and now I gots to travel again. But you make it worthwhile, baby. M-hm. I hope you snatched one of them fucking Tee-Eras that are made for those old beehive hairdos. I'm wearing that one to my next gig at the courthouse. Show that fucking judge he's messing with a Pharoah.

I'll bet your happy to get outa Rome. One less church bell to answer. And when you turn up in the jewels I will let you borrow, the others in the diva pack will shit. Too bad you don't have any concerts scheduled until 2017, dear one. Oh - don't think I'm not going to show my love and grats. I want you to keep everything with a cross on it. Just gives me second degree burns anyway. For some fucking reason.

And THANK YOU for the Swiss. It will keep Damont on his toes. Just make sure he's not Robertino, the one with green eyes. That fool's got a bad case of the dipstick drips. I should know. I gave them to him.

Only one thing makes me wish I was back at the Vatican tonight. I heard that new Papa Frankie has got a foot fetish and is lining them up to wash them. My pedicure appointment got fucked up and I could use some work BAD. I was slipping my Keds off and the bitch I use, Seoul Foo Doo, passed out. For some reason.


by Anonymousreply 6403/28/2013

And bring me a meatball sandwich.

by Anonymousreply 6503/28/2013

Hey radio stations!Play some Burt Bacharach!Dionne has a lovely voice and she needs the royalties and she hasn't had a hit in 20 years or so.

by Anonymousreply 6603/28/2013

Why the Hell didn't the Psychic Friends ?Network warn her about this?!She ought to sue them for malpractice.

by Anonymousreply 6703/28/2013

I BEG your pardon.

I had a hit only five minutes ago.

Off a bong.

by Anonymousreply 6803/28/2013

Why did so many soap actors do those stupid psychic friends commercials?

I remember seeing Krista Tesreau in a ton of them.

by Anonymousreply 6903/28/2013

I am not fucking kidding. How do you get the lid off the Champale?

It's like my own fucking personal Olive Garden lately. You know, like Jesus.

by Anonymousreply 7004/03/2013

R67, that joke was tired back in the 90s, and is certainly beaten to death THRICE on this here thread.

by Anonymousreply 7104/03/2013

owed the taxes to begin with due to some creative strategies, still has some type of corporation that "lends" her out for performances??

in other words the IRS sees money moving around but she claims to be bankrupt??

liked her in the day, hope everything is settled.

by Anonymousreply 7204/03/2013

Baby, I may have me a little cash flow problem, but I'd be glad to give you a capital O, I and L I won off of Vanna in a ladycrap game, since you seem to be all out and determined to make it seem like you're some sort of "hip" thing.

Asshole, my hips have been hipper than anything you'll ever have for longer than you'll ever be around, and even I learned from the graffiti in South Orange that you use capital letters or look like Re with her mouth yapping while her mind is all on cream pie.

by Anonymousreply 7304/03/2013

Why don't you sell reefer, Miss Warwick?

by Anonymousreply 7404/03/2013

Per R48's link, she has $20K+ monthly income ($14,000 from pension from the Screen Actors Guild). That's $250K a year. Don't sound broke to me.

by Anonymousreply 7504/03/2013

I don't sell reefer, Alfie. It's all about me keeping the sweet smoke inside my soul, so I can keep sharing my gifts with a sad and needy populace. And that's doesn't leave any left over for a cash crop.

Now if you clowns are done talking about my little personal business hiccup, I repeat: How do you get the fucking lid off this bottle? Does it pop off? Do I break it on something? My minions have flew the coop, and I got me a powerful thirst. That shit in the tap is just water.

by Anonymousreply 7604/03/2013

R75 What the hell did she do to get that big a pension from SAG? She was never an actress.

by Anonymousreply 7704/03/2013

I'll bet she sold pics of Whitney after her death.

by Anonymousreply 7804/03/2013

[quote]What the hell did she do to get that big a pension from SAG? She was never an actress.

Wasn't she in the film version of "Your Nostrils Too Small To Snort With Moi"?

by Anonymousreply 7904/03/2013

Do you know the way to AIDS today

I'm just a waif

Who always plays safe

Do you know the way, if you are gay

It's their own fault

If they'd stop AIDS would halt

Being gay is a disease

Put a hundred down and buy your meds

And all the queers

Are serving beers

Or living courtesy of the Feds

by Anonymousreply 8004/04/2013

Excuse me.

Essscuse me, but this uncompensated conversation with Miss Warwick, International Mega-Star, simply cannot continue.

A world figure such as Miss Warwick clearly must be compensated for her time and talents.

So if you want to continue this dialogue with the great Miss Dionne, you must pay. Or as the late Gwen Guthrie once sang, you got to have some mon-eeey if you wanna speak to Dee!

Euros or dollars, but no American Express. She ain't Tina fucking Turner, you know.

All 'donations' should be sent to the Miss Dionne Warwick Diva Appreciation Fund, c/o Church of the Poisoned Mind, 121 Walk On By Way, San Jose, CA, 99999. No checks, travelers checks or gift cards please.

Now you'll have to excuse Miss Warwick; she's on her way to a spiritual retreat high atop Mount Cheeba.

by Anonymousreply 8104/08/2013

Damont, dear. Thank you for your continued support and I promise I shall get that back pay to you as soon as my financial people get back to me on the market rate for that stash of Golden Weed blunts I got with gen-u-wine Nippy spit on them.

But, Damont, dear, even as I encourage you to kick the balls in of anyone who won't pay. I must wonder why you included an address that funnels into a P.O. box at a smoke shop run by your Aunt Loquesha. Wouldn't my Rio address in Brasil, which I have posted innumerablenous times, be more apropos of filling my pockets, Damont, dear?

So if you really want to see Cindi again - she's having such a nice time here - you'll route things down and not succumb to Temptations. Because as we all know there were at least 27 of those rickets-legged bean poles over the years. Resist, baby. Ain't no mountain high enough to keep me from my diva earnings.

Don't worry. You'll get your .013 percent cut off the net.

by Anonymousreply 8204/08/2013

Listen and weep, Nostril Nancy.

by Anonymousreply 8304/09/2013

I'll never understand how the world decided that she could sing. She has a HORRIBLE voice.

by Anonymousreply 8404/09/2013

Screw that revisionism. Re milked that take enough to drain a herd of dairy cows. All "If you shee me" and moaning and clipping it and faking it. She never had the knack for pop - if she wasn't shaking her flabby emotional tits in your face, she thought she wasn't doing it right. Main reason the bitch my good friend gained all that weight was so she could stand down stage and block a whole orchestra - she always was the "IT" in SHIT.

For that matter, honest simple emotion never was something she could do. Everything is either pose or bitching about some man she's gonna go back to anyway - just like in real life. Starting with going home to daddy's room. Shit.

As for me - well, I simply am the greatest pop-soul singer in the history of the universe, and that includes all 32 dimensions. Including your five, Miss McCoo, love.

And, R84, the world obviously knows a lot more than little old you. What? You wore out your Susan Boyle CD? Ass.

Now shut up or send me money. I am down to DOMESTIC ganga here, my fans!

by Anonymousreply 8504/09/2013

Miss Dionne,

You got some explaining to do sister! I followed your advice and met the cloaked figure in Venice. I was blindfolded, and next you know, I wake up in some room, dressed in a harem outfit. Suddenly the door opens and in walks Janet Jackson, Miss Nasty herself! She takes one look at me and screeches "this ain't Dionne, you fools" and then she left.

I think I'm in the Middle East somewhere. Janet has the jewels, cash and gold. I am afraid. Is there a hit out on you? Send help!

by Anonymousreply 8604/13/2013

Dear One,

I truly regret the mishap that has left you -- somewhere. Of course there is a hit out on me. After the Roma fiasco and the collapse of my dee-fense against the Aretha-publicans at the IRS, I decided to get me some back. I had Nippy scratch her way into the Liz Taylor crypt and then dig over to the Jacko hole. I heard that Momma had buried some assets there with precious Michael and so we took the Embarrassing and Tacky Escalade Gold Box they put him in and heaved it onto a U-Haul truck and took off.

Janet had a spycam going and when the floor collapsed she figgered it our. Bitch. She wants the Jackobones for a new theme park she and her ultrarich Mussylim are planning, now that she has converted to Islam and has moved out of "singing," "dancing," and "entertaining." She was trying to get me so naturally I borrowed you for a trickaroo.

Dear Marilyn. I promise to get Damont out to you as soon as we get the cash that was in the coffin dried off and disinfected. Thank God Michael was pretty much a desiccated, dried-out jerky-on-sticks - five years before he died. Still, there was ooze and little globs of rotten Snicker Bar and something that was NOT Jesus Juice to contend with. Also, there were a lot of pictures in the box that we had to burn, so as not to got to prison.

Until then, sweetums, make sure you give yourself alum douches twice a day and just hold tight. Those sheiks like it tight. And for fuck sake tuck that six-inch ladyfinger of yours we've all heard about up your crack when you're on display - you do NOT want them to think you're a boy. An old boy. A shaved monkeyboy. Your butt, at your age, would perforate.

I'm only thinking of you, baby.

Oh - we're gonna hold the Body of Jacko for ransom. How do a billion dollars sound to you?

Now I got to go refund these sody bottles I picked up in my alley search so I can get me a pack of Kools. I'm having some dead baby foundation pick me up in a limo to go to the 7/11. Told them I'd do a gig. So I'll slip out the back door and hitch back. I hate L.A. People lock their car doors.

by Anonymousreply 8704/13/2013

Poor Miss Warwick. First she's bankrupt, and now she's been shunned by Michfest dykes and the posters on the Michfest threads.


by Anonymousreply 8807/20/2013

I actually feel sorry for her. She's currently touring Europe and Asia

by Anonymousreply 8907/20/2013

The States won't have her old broke ass.

by Anonymousreply 9007/25/2013

I really liked her title theme for "Isn't She Great," the Jaclyn Susann movie with Bette Midler. Such a fun movie, it's really too bad it was a flop.

BTW is Patti LaBelle a nasty person in real life? It would be disappointing if she were. She always seemed more grounded to me. I thought she had a sense of humor about herself. But, of course I only know the public image.

by Anonymousreply 9107/25/2013

Dionne is a classic example of someone who only sings. She doesn't write or produce and clearly doesn't own her masters so she has always sustained her living through touring. I can't understand why she ruined her voice with smoking as she needs it. The money she made hosting Solid Gold and being spokeswoman for the shady Psychic Friends Network must be all dried up too.

R91 Patti can be nice or nasty depending on her mood. I've read both positive and negative stories about her. She's always nice when meeting fans at a show but she can be temperamental if you meet her in everday life.

by Anonymousreply 9207/25/2013

Miss Warwick has been underrespected and underpaid.

by Anonymousreply 9308/03/2013

This thread is solid gold.

A friend of mine used to be a venue manager back in the day and he had the (dis)pleasure of having to look after her. He said she was the cuntiest cunt who ever cunted and then was cunty some more just for the cuntishness of it.

His also said Tina Turner was all kinds of awesome. Can't remember much of the detail, (we were probably drunk) just the gist of it which was mainly Warwick=bad Turner=good. As he's quite a good judge of character I'll trust him on this.

by Anonymousreply 9408/03/2013

Bitch better find an Arab to marry!

by Anonymousreply 9508/03/2013


by Anonymousreply 9608/03/2013

Nam myoho renge kyo!

by Anonymousreply 9708/03/2013
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