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"People CAN'T make mistakes!"

My mother and I were in another argument. No matter what I did, she would find something wrong with it. Then my father got involved and they had a huge argument. My dad argued if you don't allow people to make mistakes then how will they learn*? My mother retaliated do people have to make mistakes when they are learning, isn't it possible for them to observe others and get it right. What do you think of all this?

*(My mom has refuse to let me do anything since I was very little. She would find various ways to stop what I was doing by saying that I was doing it wrong [even though many at times it was my first time doing it] and why she should do it and I should do something more productive and she did this for every aspect of my life. She, in a sense, almost crippled me.)

by Anonymousreply 1703/20/2013

Buck never would have made a mistake!

by Anonymousreply 103/19/2013

Good lord your mother sounds crazy, OP

by Anonymousreply 203/19/2013

This is so not interesting.

by Anonymousreply 303/19/2013

R2, both my dad and I suspect that she has histrionic personality disorder. My dad has made the observation that if she can't be a part of something, then it must not exist.

by Anonymousreply 403/19/2013

Sounds like she's intensely controlling, with an overwhelming need to keep you dependent.

by Anonymousreply 503/20/2013

Couldn't you just send her off to Shady Pines, OP?

by Anonymousreply 603/20/2013

My parents were kind of like that in regards to household stuff...I never had to do a single chore as a kid because I wouldn't have been able to do it right....there was a specific procedure to taking out the trash, doing the laundry, vacuuming, mowing the lawn etc. They had to do it their way.

by Anonymousreply 703/20/2013

OP = Norman Bates

by Anonymousreply 803/20/2013

op's post has absolutely no similarity to Norman Bates' story r8....but thanks for playing.

by Anonymousreply 903/20/2013

OP, get away from that environment as soon as you can. Otherwise you'll be pushing 30 and still not know how to send a letter through the mail.

True story: one of my colleagues, who was 28 or 29 at the time, believed postage was proportional to the weight of the mail. Basically, she didn't know how to assess the price for an package. She didn't know there were different prices up until such-and-such weight. I could hardly believe she did not know this and she was truly offended when I unintentionally laughed in her face.

by Anonymousreply 1103/20/2013

Stuff like this can really handicap you....I have a friend (he's 30) whose parents did everything for him ....especially when it came to college and arranging his student loans and paying them off. (he had to pay the money but they do all the paperwork) Just the other day I had to explain to him what interest on a loan is. He had no idea that they add money to the principle for letting you borrow it.

by Anonymousreply 1203/20/2013

OP, are you still reading this from home where your mother is? When do you plan to move out?

by Anonymousreply 1303/20/2013

Yeah, there's no correcting that situation from the inside. Get out, now. I had family like that growing up, and a boyfriend since. Some people have OCD like requirements for everything, and if you don't do it precisely their way it's all wrong and you'll hear about it. If you have to be around this type of person, best to just let them do everything, because anything else is more hassle than it's worth. But then you get the shaming and guilt dropping of 'I have to do everything around here' and 'you're no help', etc. etc. So yeah, run.

by Anonymousreply 1403/20/2013

OP, your mom and I conversed via text.

We agreed that your post is uninteresting and badly formatted and you're not pretty enough for me to help at this time.

Perhaps you should lurk and observe until you're ready to make original posts.

by Anonymousreply 1503/20/2013

[quote]She, in a sense, almost crippled me.

Mary!

by Anonymousreply 1603/20/2013

I had a mother very similar to this. My mother was also an alcoholic with bipolar disorder and a secondary addiction to prescription painkillers. I am way behind other people my own age in terms of emotional maturity and life skills, and even after years of therapy, I still feel a lot of anger and resentment towards my mother, especially when my dad and sister admitted that all of us become better people when she is not around. My advice is to try to break free of the family; the earlier, the better.

by Anonymousreply 1703/20/2013
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