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My Semen Is Lumpy Like Risotto

It used to be smooth like lotion but no more, is this happening with age? I'm still young, 27.

by Anonymousreply 4404/03/2013

Not age. I hate to imagine what's wrong up there.

by Anonymousreply 103/18/2013

You are dying.

OP, may I have all your stuff?

by Anonymousreply 203/18/2013

R2, surely you don't want ALL of his stuff. Nothing with lumps, for instance.

This reminds me -- is it not generally known that there were originally eight dwarves, until Lumpy died of cancer?

by Anonymousreply 303/18/2013

Happened to me a few times, but only after having not ejaculated for a few weeks. It stung a little bit when it came out, too. But a couple JOs later it was back to normal.

by Anonymousreply 403/18/2013

Lump bump.

by Anonymousreply 503/18/2013

you drink too much caffeine, you eat too much sugar. drink water and layoff the sugar. it makes your cum lumpy and horrid tasting.

by Anonymousreply 603/18/2013

I feel full after the risotto.

by Anonymousreply 703/18/2013

Wel OP 27 is not really all that young.

You know.

by Anonymousreply 803/18/2013

Spending so much time on the DL in the company of notorious sourpusses has caused it to curdle.

by Anonymousreply 903/18/2013

Just like Billy Harrington's still tastes great what's the problem!

by Anonymousreply 1003/18/2013

Are you hung OP?

Perhaps you should post a picture of your junk and let us judge.

by Anonymousreply 1103/18/2013

God, not another Italian cooking thread.

by Anonymousreply 1203/18/2013

Mine is lumpy like Graxy!

by Anonymousreply 1303/18/2013

...also known as "Clotted Cream"

by Anonymousreply 1403/18/2013

Take Mucinex.

by Anonymousreply 1503/18/2013

same thing happened to me at your age, OP. It was nothing and went away.

by Anonymousreply 1603/18/2013

Drink more water and eat a few more complex carbs.

by Anonymousreply 1703/18/2013

Pineapple and strawberries.

by Anonymousreply 1803/18/2013

Try spreading some on a Triscut.

by Anonymousreply 1903/18/2013

That usually happens went you haven't ejaculated for awhile, OP.

by Anonymousreply 2003/18/2013

[quote]Just like Billy Harrington's still tastes great what's the problem!

What? Did you really? OMG.

by Anonymousreply 2103/18/2013

Wheat germ.

by Anonymousreply 2203/18/2013

Someone just posted this yesterday, why did someone basically post the same thing again, just flourishing the language with food analogies and adding your age?

by Anonymousreply 2303/18/2013

My old boyfriend used to always end our sex with 'that's it, swallow that lumpy load'. Maybe like Snilla's Sense of Snow, gays should have 600 different terms for semen types.

by Anonymousreply 2403/18/2013

Lumpy Risotto sounds like a Notre Dame linebacker from 1932.

by Anonymousreply 2503/18/2013

From the laptop in the lap. It is cooked.

by Anonymousreply 2603/18/2013


by Anonymousreply 2703/19/2013

LOL r27, W&W

by Anonymousreply 2803/19/2013

OP, that's nothing.... my risotto is lumpy like semen.

by Anonymousreply 2903/19/2013

Perfectly normal for some, ocassional for others, when they haven't ejaculated for awhile.

Thought I would compare it more to ricotta than risotto (pardon the cheese reference).

by Anonymousreply 3003/19/2013

They are fatty lipids, they vary according to hormone levels. All man produce them, though some are very soft and blend in.

When you go longer between ejaculations the body stores them in the prostate and they lose a bit of moisture making them more firm.

You are perfectly normal.

by Anonymousreply 3103/19/2013

Urologists say having twenty ejaculations a month prevents prostate problems as you get older.

by Anonymousreply 3203/19/2013

You need to take a video of yourself and semen shooting out and post it in here. It will be easier for us to give you a better consultation.

by Anonymousreply 3303/19/2013

Thank you so much for sharing.

by Anonymousreply 3403/19/2013

Shit, R32, I have that many every week. Easily.

by Anonymousreply 3503/19/2013

"Urologists say having twenty ejaculations a month prevents prostate problems as you get older. "

I think this is killing a possible fetus.

by Anonymousreply 3603/19/2013

Make a roux first.

by Anonymousreply 3703/19/2013

[quote]Urologists say having twenty ejaculations a month prevents prostate problems as you get older.

Wow. I guess I really need to cut back then.

by Anonymousreply 3803/19/2013

OP, hows your lumpy semen doing?

by Anonymousreply 3903/22/2013

Mix the lumpy semen with 5 tbs. arrowroot powder and 3/4 cup of chicken broth. Microwave for 30 sec. for a nice mid-morning pick up.

by Anonymousreply 4003/22/2013

Careful, R2. You don't want ALL his stuff. Let someone else deal with the dregs.

by Anonymousreply 4103/22/2013

Is Lumpy still around?

by Anonymousreply 4204/01/2013

My cum used to taste like a nice hollandaise sauce now it just tastes like saltines mixed in with some rancid milk......

by Anonymousreply 4304/02/2013

Let it dry, then use it to make sugar-free nonpareils.

by Anonymousreply 4404/03/2013
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