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Being young and gay was fun and mysterious.

Now it's just boring. Now I am 44 and can pay cash for a new car but what's the point? I still have my hair but it is greying. Now I get home from work and I am too tired to do anything.

by Anonymousreply 2803/19/2013

It's middle age. There's plenty of things to do that don't require a lot of energy. Do you want to be 19 forever? I was tired of it by the time I was 22.

Garden, read, cook, write, have your husband suck you off (don't have a husband? we can fix that!)

by Anonymousreply 103/14/2013

Being young was fun and mysterious. I wish there had been a better instruction manual for the gay part back then. Seems like the young ones today have much more well worn path to follow and at the very least easy access to information which we absolutely did not have. I was totally alone in my gayness until I was in my late 20's and moved to NY. Feel like I missed a lot.

by Anonymousreply 203/14/2013

I thought being gay in the late 80s/early 90s was terrifying. Everyone was dying. At least that's what I'm told.

But yeah, life sucks and then you die. Surprised it took you this long to figure it out.

by Anonymousreply 303/14/2013

Yeah, but in your defense R2,... It was after all, the 1920's.

by Anonymousreply 403/14/2013

Are you kidding me OP? When I was young I couldn't afford to rent a villa in Positano with my friends, when I was young I was too stupid realize that doing all that blow was a waste of time and hurting me. I like being middle aged, the toys are much better.

by Anonymousreply 503/14/2013

true mystery starts once you are old enough to comprehend it all ----LIFE begins the real magic after 50

by Anonymousreply 603/14/2013

Being young was sometimes fun but it was never mysterious. Often confusing, but never mysterious.

by Anonymousreply 703/14/2013

Much prefer my 50s. The only downside for me is the stubborn weight gain.

by Anonymousreply 803/14/2013

I don't understand what you did then that you can't do now, and I would think there's much more you can do now that you couldn't do then.

by Anonymousreply 903/14/2013

I'm sure I'll get pasted for even suggesting this, but I think I look BETTER now at age 45 than I did at age 21. Back then, I ate and drank like a pig and never bathed or maintained myself. I assumed that my youth would be alluring enough.

These days (even thought it's a lot less fun), I take care of myself. And I look damn good. And all the 23 year olds with daddy fixations seem to agree.

by Anonymousreply 1003/14/2013

[quote]Now I get home from work and I am too tired to do anything.

Possible reasons: you aren't having enough protein or you're having too many carbs in the afternoon; or you need regualar exercise; or both.

I watch my carbs/protein during the day and get regular exercise and I have plenty of energy. Granted, at 50 something somewhere on my body always hurts at least a little, but that's middle age. But you don't have to be tired as you describe.

by Anonymousreply 1103/14/2013

Join a group; lots of gay sports groups or social interest groups (i.e. supper clubs or language clubs).

by Anonymousreply 1203/14/2013

That's why they always say "Youth is wasted on the young."

by Anonymousreply 1303/14/2013

Middle age can be fun - go work out like a banshee and get a rock hard bod. Concentrate on seducing straight men and random hook ups with guys 19-24 via adam4adam or grinder. Make a game of it. I blew the ge repairman the other day who was married. Life is a game, make up the rules.

by Anonymousreply 1403/14/2013

Actually, if you age appropriately, you won't feel the need to do as R14 describes.

by Anonymousreply 1503/14/2013

My 40s were my best years as a gay slut OP- get off your butt and have some fun.

by Anonymousreply 1603/14/2013

Being young and gay is still fun and mysterious, OP, but you are no longer young and gay. Presumably you are still gay, but you put too much stock in being young, and did not develop anything with which to replace it.

by Anonymousreply 1703/14/2013

This feeling hit me in the last year or so.

I'm in my early 50s. I used to be really active going to school part time, enjoying hobbies like writing and photography and working in my garden.

Had some health issues (back) and ever since then the only thing I want to do is come home from work is to lay on the couch and watch TV. Some days I don;t even have the energy to make dinner.

I was hoping with the time change I'd be motivated to get started on the yard projects, but no go.

Work is sucking the life out of me more and more.

I'm absolutely hating feeling this way, but can't seem to shake it.

by Anonymousreply 1803/14/2013

You're actually bragging about that [R14]?

by Anonymousreply 1903/14/2013

You can pay cash for a new car?????

by Anonymousreply 2003/14/2013

Read a book, travel to one of the great cities of civilization and drink it in. Volunteer. Teach literacy, contribute. Opium.

Your description of yourself is why some people think that gay men are shallow self-centered hedonists.

Woody Allen said that people on the planet are divided between the miserable and the wretched. You are only bored and not young.

You probably have forty more years to live. Best to come up with something other than missing your youth and the bars to focus your attention on.

by Anonymousreply 2103/14/2013

You sound like you need to become a dad. Not biologically in any sense unless you want to. But these young gay men can definitely use some wise instruction and direction that you could possibly offer. Think about it. The greeks were right. The younger needs the older. And it's not bad having a good looking older, more experienced fuck buddy and I do mean buddy(friend) around. I now I would really appreciate it.

by Anonymousreply 2203/14/2013

I hear ya, OP. I was feeling aged out/burnt out of NYC a few years ago, and ended up buying a house in the suburbs. A very secluded, lovely house and I am very happy here, but sometimes I wake up and wonder WTF I am doing out here by myself. I am in a LTR (15+ years) and see my BF, who still lives in NYC, on weekends. During the week though it's mostly just me. I don't have, or particularly want, close friends here. I work, go to the gym and go home. I thought about getting a dog but it's too much responsibility and my work day is too long. I don't want to have to pay a dog nanny. I think it's going to be like this for the next 20 or so years, until I can retire, then hopefully have some fun again!

by Anonymousreply 2303/14/2013

Yes, it was fun to travel around the world, discovering that almost all guys like to have homosexual experiences. It wasn't part of what I was taught in any shape, way, or form as a youngster. Now, with the internet, almost everybody knows and acknowledges this fact. Times change. Shrug.

I like some things about being older, and dislike other things. As with everything else in life, things are what you make of them.

by Anonymousreply 2403/14/2013

That's true, I think the mysterious part was lost to everyone once the internet came to be.

by Anonymousreply 2503/15/2013

I took up meth now I am happy and thin!

by Anonymousreply 2603/19/2013

It was fun and mysterious? Because everything was possible and nothing made sense? Had you been smarter, OP, things would have been less mysterious, but might still be fun.

by Anonymousreply 2703/19/2013

OP, have you ever considered:

Earrings

Caftans

by Anonymousreply 2803/19/2013
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