Link is to Gawker.
Rich White Woman Decides She Didn't Want to Adopt Her Chinese Kids After All
|by Anonymous||reply 85||03/05/2013|
You can give them back when you tire of them? Dammit, why did nobody ever tell me that?
|by Anonymous||reply 1||03/04/2013|
I'm surprised this isn't done more often.
|by Anonymous||reply 2||03/04/2013|
This woman is disgusting. I'm surprised she was even able to adopt children. The policies should be tightened.
Now that China's getting rich, I'm pretty sure it'll get harder and harder for people outside of China to be able to adopt children from China.
|by Anonymous||reply 3||03/04/2013|
What does her race have to do with anything OP.
|by Anonymous||reply 4||03/04/2013|
I've always been of the belief that if someone is going to adopt, they should adopt American kids. There's a lot of them in need of a home. Why go to China or Russia? It's more expensive and time consuming to go through the waiting period and all the paperwork.
|by Anonymous||reply 5||03/04/2013|
|by Anonymous||reply 6||03/04/2013|
R4 is quite right; the monstrous adoptive mother's race is irrelevant. Actually, so is the land of origin of the child, although the probable fact that the kid is of another race might have factored into the story.
Some of you, though, are severely misguided about the availability of adoptable kids in this country. The mechanics of domestic adoption have rendered foreign adoptions more attractive. China, though, is one of several countries closing, or at least narrowing, their doors to American prospective parents.
|by Anonymous||reply 7||03/04/2013|
Narcissists adopt Chinese girls in the hope that these girls will support them in old age.
It is also a prestige thing in many liberal communties. These little girls are to liberals as expensive handbags are to Paris Hilton.
Of course, they could put in the effort to adopt American children, but dislike the scrutiny that it may require.
It's not harder to adopt here, just more comprehensive.
|by Anonymous||reply 8||03/04/2013|
[quote]The mechanics of domestic adoption have rendered foreign adoptions more attractive.
Mom can't show up ten years later wanting her kid back.
|by Anonymous||reply 9||03/04/2013|
r7 if you ask me why I think some potential adopters opt to go to China or Russia, I'll say it's because it's a racial issue regarding the pool of available foster kids. The great majority of kids needing adoption are black. Not only black, but born to mothers who are drug addicted and so they come with all the baggage and stigma of being a crack baby. That may not be factual, but it is the perception.
So these potential adopters take their chances abroad. In general white babies are snatched up like hot cakes, whereas children/babies of other races stay in foster care much much longer.
|by Anonymous||reply 10||03/04/2013|
Move over, Patsy Ramsey and Helen Lawson. I think DL has a brand new heroine. Bow down to Queen Christine, bitches.
|by Anonymous||reply 11||03/04/2013|
She had 6 freakin' kids already. And then her whole, "I was a mess, I didn't know what I was doing" excuse.
No, that's when you eat too much chocolate or order a whole set of Laugh-In DVDs you saw advertised on late night TV.
|by Anonymous||reply 12||03/04/2013|
I personally think that if people want to adopt so bad, they shouldn't be able to choose the race of the child they get. If they really wanted kids, they wouldn't care.
|by Anonymous||reply 13||03/04/2013|
Liberal democrats who adopt Chinese girls would NEVER adopt a black child.
They are hypocrits, and the first ones to point out everyone else's flaws and weaknesses.
|by Anonymous||reply 14||03/04/2013|
That Reactive Attachment Disorder is a big "thing" with these adopted kids and a big excuse why they are sent back. I mentioned on another thread about a 20/20 I saw where some white adopters sent back their Russian kids because they had RAD. It sounded like bullshit to me but it's the new out for parents who decide they don't want their kids.
|by Anonymous||reply 15||03/04/2013|
What are you babbling about R14? What the hell does politics have to do with this?
|by Anonymous||reply 16||03/04/2013|
Funny, all the kids I've met who were adopted didn't have RAD.
|by Anonymous||reply 17||03/04/2013|
r14 is a freeper. He's in other threads doing the same thing.
|by Anonymous||reply 18||03/04/2013|
r5/r10, stop trying to make this a racial issue and something you know very little about. The majority of children in the US foster care system are NOT available for adoption. Their parents, although not able to care for them, have refused to give up parental rights. In many cases, this leads to an entire childhood spent in the foster care system.
|by Anonymous||reply 19||03/04/2013|
China's birthrate is rising because the financial penalty for more than one child is no longer beyond the means of most people.
|by Anonymous||reply 20||03/04/2013|
this one was even worse
|by Anonymous||reply 21||03/04/2013|
American adoptions of white kids is practically impossible unless you can compete on the private adoption market--i.e. can pay large amounts for the mother's "expenses" or happen to know the mother. As far as adopting non-white children in the US, many couples rightly or wrongly want a baby and most adoptable children in the US are not babies, and they also typically seek a child of their own race first. Some people are not equipped to raise a child of a different race. Too many well intention whites try to raise African American kids with a "race is not an issue" attitude in a society in which it is. Until fairly recently many African American social workers were against such adoptions.
Termination of parental rights in the US can be very lengthy and many social service agencies are for reunification first, so if there is a chance that a child in foster services can be returned to his or her family, they cannot be adopted.
In other words adopting in the US is complicated.
|by Anonymous||reply 22||03/04/2013|
So, do you know one non-demos who have adopted Chinese babes?
Not I. No, not a freeper, not a repub, not a demo, not anything. I've given up, actually, on being 'something' political on a large scale. i am no longer a 'member' of any political group.
Fuck 'em. Fuck 'em all to hell. Our country has been stolen from us by both parties.
I'm just observing the bullshit I see with the so-called liberals who walk around so smug but in reality hate the poor, underpriviledged, always hate on the poor blacks, the so-called white trash, and eventually the gays.
Quit defending them. They don't care about you either.
|by Anonymous||reply 23||03/04/2013|
[quote]China, though, is one of several countries closing, or at least narrowing, their doors to American prospective parents.
And, clearly, for good reason.
|by Anonymous||reply 24||03/04/2013|
How much self-delusion must this woman possess to think she could mother this child? I went through more introspection and priority management when I got my dog.
|by Anonymous||reply 25||03/04/2013|
R23=freeper fascist pig. Gays can't adopt in most of the USA, so they go abroad. Duh. This woman was not gay and probably could easily adopt in the US with her wealth.
|by Anonymous||reply 26||03/04/2013|
What in the hell is R26 talking about?
Please learn to read. No one here is talking about gays adopting.
|by Anonymous||reply 27||03/04/2013|
An Russian kid adopted by Texans recently dies, and Russian agents arrived to investigate. So there's that (not that they want to protect the kids, but that foreigners are intruding).
|by Anonymous||reply 28||03/04/2013|
R23 I know quite a few democrats who have adopted black kids right here in the US. One was a single woman who never married but wanted to help out some kids. So quit with your nonsense. Political affiliation has nothing to do with adoptions. They are really nice kids and she's doing a great job with them.
I find it ironic though that many people who scream about abortion being murder never adopt kids. Forced birth and then fuck 'em all seems to be their ideology. They are usually religious, rightwing nuts.
|by Anonymous||reply 29||03/04/2013|
Hypocrite has an E at the end - hypocrite
|by Anonymous||reply 30||03/04/2013|
What is this RAD business? It sounds like the kid is just shy and awkward. Which I'd imagine is PRETTY freaking normal if your parents give you away...
|by Anonymous||reply 31||03/04/2013|
Since when do post-menopausal women think it's a good idea to wear white, strapless wedding gowns? Judging from photos taken closer up, she's been post-menopausal for a while.
The Daily Mail took some of the family's personal photos from their Facebook page. All of the bio children are so Nordic/Scandinavian-looking it's kind of funny.
Am I completely cynical for thinking it's clearly a case of "two of these things are not like the others, two of these things do not belong."?
|by Anonymous||reply 32||03/04/2013|
[quote] Her reason for giving up Eric: "I couldn't handle seven children," Svenningsen answered.
She should have given me a call!
|by Anonymous||reply 33||03/04/2013|
In her defense, being Chinese is nature not nurture. I'm sure she was stunned when they turned out to be chinese.
|by Anonymous||reply 34||03/04/2013|
R29, You know a great lady who puts her money where her mouth is. God bless her.
I see otherwise, but I don't deny your claims.
Lots of people have made it hard to adopt black/latino/poor white/disabled children in America but it's heartwarming to hear that many succeed.
I am referring to a certain type though.
|by Anonymous||reply 35||03/04/2013|
What people, R35?
Exactly who is making it "hard" to adopt these children?
|by Anonymous||reply 36||03/04/2013|
I was sitting at a lunch in the Hamptons with a woman who dropped by. She had been "booted out" of her Hamptons Home by her husband and she was pissed. She'd spend the weekends visiting her old friends there. She talked to me about doing everything she could to save her marriage. "I was even willing to adopt a Chinese baby. And you know you have to have them de-loused before you can bring them back into this country."
I'll never forget that statement, and how afterwards I said a silent prayer she hadn't been able to adopt...or keep the house.
|by Anonymous||reply 37||03/04/2013|
R32, are you a time traveler visiting us from the Victorian era? "Since when" is it required for a woman to be fertile in order to wear a white strapless gown?
White wedding dresses no longer symbolize virginity. It's just a tradition now and has been for the last 50 years. Otherwise, literally NO ONE would be able to wear a white gown.
|by Anonymous||reply 38||03/04/2013|
Christ, R38. You missed the entire point.
|by Anonymous||reply 39||03/04/2013|
White babies who are up for adoption are few and far between because many, if not most, white American girls who have unwanted pregnancies get abortions.
|by Anonymous||reply 40||03/04/2013|
Dear rich white woman in question, You don't need to tolerate this negativity. Call my lawyer, Allison Hart. The law firm is Lavely and Singer. She will send threatening letters to the webmaster and this harrassement will be deleted immediately.No one needs to be so abused like this.
Take care, Tig Notaro
|by Anonymous||reply 41||03/04/2013|
What was your point, R39?
Please enlighten us as to why you felt it relevant to point out that a *gasp* "post menopausal" woman wore a white strapless wedding dress.
|by Anonymous||reply 42||03/04/2013|
R19 - You're the one who doesn't seem to know what they're talking about. There are over 100k kids in the US available for adoption. Race IS a big reason people don't want to adopt them, as is age.
|by Anonymous||reply 43||03/04/2013|
I can't get past the fact that you linked to Gawker.
|by Anonymous||reply 44||03/04/2013|
This isn't even a case of "buyers remorse" or someone not knowing what they were getting into by adopting a child. This is simply a case of greed. Disgusting.
|by Anonymous||reply 45||03/04/2013|
isn't adoption more difficult now because the bith parents have more rights (even if they are parents with problems and not the best parents etc)
I'm sure some are worried about the race of the child, though.
People criticize others for adoption children of different races or not adopting children of different races.
People should only be allowed to adopt or have children if they are kind - of course impossible
|by Anonymous||reply 46||03/04/2013|
Yeah, it's children as objects, the culture of consumption. Return within 20 days and get your money back.
|by Anonymous||reply 47||03/04/2013|
I wonder why people think this is so terrible, but think it's okay when people adopt children from Russia and then dump them? Because the stereotypes about those children are different? It seems that the racism here isn't operating quite the way everyone is presuming it does.
|by Anonymous||reply 48||03/04/2013|
No worry. I buy and sell old bitch when I get my inheritance from my "dad". White bitch shouldn't have fucked me over! I won't even have to bang annoying old Jew. Take lesson from me, Soon-Yi.
|by Anonymous||reply 49||03/04/2013|
[quote]What was your point, [R39]?
It looks like shit on her.
|by Anonymous||reply 50||03/04/2013|
R45 is right. Greed. Bitch didn't want to share the money.
|by Anonymous||reply 51||03/04/2013|
I'm actually more concerned with her hair. Why would a wealthy woman have soccer frau hair?
|by Anonymous||reply 52||03/04/2013|
There are nearly a half million children in the US foster care system. About a quarter of them are available for adoption. Many are older children, part of sibling groups who shouldn't be separated, and have extensive emotional challenges.
If more unfit parents gave up their children at birth, instead of waiting until they were saddled with learning disabilities and emotional issues, and were older and part of sibling groups, US adoption would be a lot more attractive to adoptive parents.
|by Anonymous||reply 53||03/04/2013|
I wish they would stop letting religious zealots adopt them.
|by Anonymous||reply 54||03/04/2013|
[quote]Narcissists adopt Chinese girls in the hope that these girls will support them in old age.
Isn't this the reason most (narcissistic) people have biological children as well? We're all inherently selfish assholes at the core.
|by Anonymous||reply 55||03/04/2013|
The bottom line is it's just a lot harder to take American children away from their parents by force. Single mothers aren't under the same pressure to give up their children as they used to be, and current child protective service policy is more towards trying to keep children with their families or putting them in foster care rather than pressuring the parents to give them up for adoption. And reading some of these stories you can see why. There truly are some genuinely fucked-up parents out there and wonderful adoptive parents, but the biological odds are that a parent that's genetically related to the child is going to have more of a stake in its survival than a stranger.
|by Anonymous||reply 56||03/04/2013|
R52, funny I thought the same thing.
|by Anonymous||reply 57||03/04/2013|
R47, show me someone who thinks it's okay to return Russian children. First, that person is an asshole. Second, that person is greatly outnumbered by the millions who think that returning children in that fashion is evil. You're setting up a straw man.
|by Anonymous||reply 58||03/04/2013|
One of the replies has to be from somebody here, the one about it not being fashionable anymore and giving to it to the help.
|by Anonymous||reply 59||03/04/2013|
The wealthy can be extremely cruel to their children...of course no one usually hears about it.
|by Anonymous||reply 60||03/04/2013|
My friend had to make an album of pictures of them and then the pregnant girl looks at the pictures and picks who she likes. So if you are young and attractive you have an advantage. Open adoption is what's popular, the birthmother can visit all the time and you are basically a babysitter for her kid.
|by Anonymous||reply 61||03/04/2013|
[quote]I wonder why people think this is so terrible, but think it's okay when people adopt children from Russia and then dump them?
WTF are you babbling about? Who here said they think dumping Russian adoptees is okay?
|by Anonymous||reply 62||03/04/2013|
It's the downtrodden white male posting again, R62.
|by Anonymous||reply 63||03/04/2013|
Russia has now banned Americans from adopting. However, getting one on the black market is quite a status symbol is some social circles.
|by Anonymous||reply 64||03/04/2013|
[quote]I wonder why people think this is so terrible, but think it's okay when people adopt children from Russia and then dump them?
That ONE Russian kid dumped had severe fetal alcohol syndrome and was too much for the adoptive mom. It was a mess all around, I agree, but...
|by Anonymous||reply 65||03/04/2013|
She shoulda done what this Russian baby adopter did and just "forget" the kids in the back of the car on a hot day.
Of course, Dad was acquitted of criminal charges.Whoops!
|by Anonymous||reply 66||03/04/2013|
Motherhood is an important job and should not be taken on for any reason other than a desire to love and nurture a child.. This woman should be ashamed of herself she gives women and mothers a bad name. It is such a shame the child was not adopted by one of the good mother out there.
Women like Karen Lawrence mother of Academy Award winner Jennifer Lawrence. Karen obviously did a fabulous job as she raised a truly wonderful daughter. It is easy to see within minutes of meeting Jennifer that she is someone who was raised to have a kind loving heart and a generous spirit. She is some who spreads love and joy everywhere she goes. Jennifer has said herself that she considers children to be a blessing and, motherhood to be a sacred duty. I am sure she would never treat a child with such craven disregard for their well-being.
|by Anonymous||reply 67||03/04/2013|
I have heard about other Russian kids being given back. There's even a special camp for these kids with RAD and I think they try there first before sending them back.
|by Anonymous||reply 68||03/04/2013|
Any child can be characterized by a parent as having a "defiance" disorder, and multiple Eastern European adoptees have been returned/abused to death because the parents have alleged defiance disorder, attachment disorder, FAS, etc. These problems don't occur in Chinese orphans? The bottom line is that stereotyping gives some adoptive parents a pass for ridding themselves of unwanted adoptive children, while demonizing others, like this woman.
|by Anonymous||reply 69||03/04/2013|
Well documented in Russia, R69. Might have been a cultural thing.
No "pass" though.
|by Anonymous||reply 70||03/04/2013|
r69 - a relative adopted from China and her child had almost like a nanny in the orphanage. Meanwhile in Russia there is one caretaker for a dozen babies. That's why there is a higher risk for RAD in Russian children.
|by Anonymous||reply 71||03/04/2013|
In addition to care taking differences between Russia and China that R71 mentions, almost all, if not all of the Chinese adoptees are girls [italic]and[/italic] it's highly unlikely that they have issues related to maternal substance abuse. Boys, in general, are more likely to act out and throw FAS into the mix...
|by Anonymous||reply 72||03/04/2013|
No. The reason is many Russian babies have FAS. Severe alcoholism is prevalent in Russia, but unfortunately FAS is not always identified until the baby becomes a toddler. Many early Russian adoptions went through with adoptive parents who were completely unaware of any developmental problems until it was too late. Some couldn't cope.
Chinese mothers typically do not abuse alcohol or drugs. That's a big reason Chinese babies became popular.
|by Anonymous||reply 73||03/04/2013|
Several years ago I was returning from China when a seemingly endless parade of passengers boarded the plane. I assumed this would be a trip from hell but it was really sweet. There were 40 very young children that were adopted and going home with there new parents. All but one were girls. The little boy had a harelip and was adopted by a preacher and his wife. The woman behind me had the most beautiful little girl. She told me about the process of adoption. It took 3 years with interviews, sending tax returns etc.... They were really checked out. It cost them 10,000.00 and she said the orphanage had multiple groups of 40 people all day. The children were dropped off at the orphanage, the children basically stayed in cribs with no clothing or diapers on and no real affection. It was great to see how happy the parents were. The children were quiet. You would have no idea 40 children were on the plane ( thankfully)
|by Anonymous||reply 74||03/04/2013|
Obviously, no one on this thread has ever seen "The Orphan."
|by Anonymous||reply 75||03/04/2013|
[quote]Women like Karen Lawrence mother of Academy Award winner Jennifer Lawrence. Karen obviously did a fabulous job as she raised a truly wonderful daughter.
Was Jennifer Lawrence adopted?
|by Anonymous||reply 76||03/04/2013|
That's women for ya!
|by Anonymous||reply 77||03/04/2013|
she's the wack a doo buying all the thimble islands here in Branford ct. This story does.not.surprise.me.at.all. She gets upset when people in boats or kayaks look at her islands from the water.
|by Anonymous||reply 78||03/04/2013|
r76 no Jennifer Lawrence was not adopted. I think r67 is a whackadoo.
|by Anonymous||reply 79||03/04/2013|
Jennifer Lawrence is NOT adopted - r67 is cray cray.
[quote] "The actress’s parents, Karen and Gary Lawrence, live in the same Indian Hills neighborhood where their daughter, a “surprise” and the youngest of three siblings, spent her childhood."[/quote]
|by Anonymous||reply 80||03/04/2013|
Ok now I'm convinced r67 is a our new Jennifer Lawrence Troll. The over the top worship with the goal of annoying the shit out of DL with this actress.
I see you, r67. You are no Streep Troll (TM)
|by Anonymous||reply 81||03/04/2013|
I don't feel for the woman who gave up the Chinese child and then got herself sued. I don't feel for her one bit.Read the article on the link. She recently spent 33 MILLION dollars buying up 10 of the Thimble Islands in the Long Island Sound, off the coast of Connecticut. She has the cash to pay. Just like the rich to be concerned about their money rather than obeying any contract or giving any cash to one no longer a part of their family.
The Thimble Islands are off the coast of one of the nicest shoreline part of the state of CT.
|by Anonymous||reply 82||03/05/2013|
Oh spare me the "Chinese mothers don't abuse" alcohol, orphans have their own nannies bit. The latter is just a cultural stereotype of the superior Asian, and the latter makes absolutely no sense--if they had the resources to assign a "nanny" to every orphan, why would they need adoptive parents? These are the fantasies white American parents feed themselves about adopting a high IQ well-bred obedient China doll. As this woman discovered, they may not be all they're cracked up to be, especially if you raise them like little Americans.
|by Anonymous||reply 83||03/05/2013|
33 Million for islands and still can't get herself a good hairstylist.
|by Anonymous||reply 84||03/05/2013|
There are ways to avoid messy lawsuits.
|by Anonymous||reply 85||03/05/2013|