I'd make it so that celebrities aren't paid as much as they are and more money is funneled toward the healthcare industry.
If you were allowed to make a law, what law would it be?
|by Anonymous||reply 94||04/16/2013|
Ban male circumcision (just as underage female cutting is illegal) unless the male is 18 or even 21 or unless there were a compelling medical reason, which is also relatively rare. By the time the male is an adult, he would realize cutting is barbraic and unnecessary, and he would enjoy having a foreskin.
|by Anonymous||reply 4||02/27/2013|
The highest paid executive (or any other person) at a company cannot make more than 100 times that of the lowest paid person (part-timers and contractors included). Pay is defined as the full compensation package (annual income, benefits, bonuses, stock, etc). When correcting the imbalance, at least 30% of the delta being closed must be made up of raising the wages/bonuses on the poorest employees ... the rest can be done by cutting the compensation packages of the highest paid.
Currently it's nearly 500 times, so bringing it down to 100 times (while still outrageous) would be a vast improvement.
|by Anonymous||reply 5||02/27/2013|
Ban the banning of circumcision, should it ever be banned. Head hiders: who needs 'em?
|by Anonymous||reply 6||02/27/2013|
Ban the Ban and Bans!
|by Anonymous||reply 7||02/27/2013|
R1 and R3 are vile.
|by Anonymous||reply 8||02/27/2013|
Universal Single Payer health care.
|by Anonymous||reply 10||02/27/2013|
force every man to give me head
|by Anonymous||reply 11||02/27/2013|
Why am I vile, R8?
|by Anonymous||reply 13||02/28/2013|
My law shall state "To whom it may concern: When a lady loves a gentleman, he must love her in return."
In re: my law; ad hoc, to wit, to woo: "When a lady feels affectionate, then the man must follow through."
Here's another law we women'll do our best to legislate: "It shall be completely criminal for a man to break a date. Each offender shall be rapidly thrown in jail where he belongs." Thus we'll write our Bill of Wrongs.
My law is what the world is waiting for. Every unrequited lover will be grateful when it meets the full approval of the House and Senate, Such enthusiasm as you never saw will greet my lovely law!
In re: my law; it should be understood: with the help of women everywhere we shall outlaw bachelorhood!
What's more, in lieu...
Morris: Marie, before you're through, I've got some things I'd like to say; if you have got to outlaw anything you should outlaw in-laws, too!
Marie: I'm concerned with what the man must do. "Every girl shall have a honeymoon which shall last at least a year. During which aforesaid honeymoon every care shall disappear. Ipso facto, let the government get the bride and groom alone. After that they're on their own."
Whereas (whereat) hereby (hereof) herein (there-out, and furthermore) My law is what the world is waiting for. We are going to rid the country of contempt of courtship, Legally replacing it with davenportship Such enthusiasm as you never saw will greet my lovely law!
|by Anonymous||reply 14||02/28/2013|
I totally agree with R3 and R4.
|by Anonymous||reply 15||02/28/2013|
Make a law where idiotic people can't make laws about what others can and can't do.
|by Anonymous||reply 16||02/28/2013|
A $100 fine will be imposed on anyone who does not stay to the right when walking on a sidewalk or in a public area such as a park.
|by Anonymous||reply 17||02/28/2013|
Women on public assistance will have their tubes tied after second child.
|by Anonymous||reply 18||02/28/2013|
Men on public assistance will have a vasectomy after their second child.
|by Anonymous||reply 19||02/28/2013|
Greedy people should be fined for greedy acts and the money given to the poor.
|by Anonymous||reply 20||02/28/2013|
All elections publicly funded. No company or corporation may donate to any political cause. No individual may donate more than $2000 in any given election cycle to any given politician (i.e. all donations to all politicians in a given four year period may not amount to more than $2000). No individual may donate more than $2000 per year to any political party.
Capital Gains taxed at the same level as income for everyone.
A financial transaction tax of 0.1% on every stock trade.
Estate tax of 50% on all inheritance over $2Million (the value of family farms and small private local businesses exempt from the calculation).
Banning of private, for-profit prisons. Immediate disbarment and jail time for any Judge found to have declared guilty and sent anyone to a private prison they themselves had invested in.
Immediate re-instatement of the Glass-Steagall act, and breaking up of all big banks into private savings and investment entities.
Immediate closure of all tax loopholes on corporations and the wealthy that encourage them to ship jobs over-seas, or stash profits and wealth in over-seas "tax-havens".
Immediate end to all federal government subsidies to profitable fossil fuel industries.
|by Anonymous||reply 21||02/28/2013|
After single payer healthcare:
Reverse the Hyde Amendment and have government fully fund abortions.
|by Anonymous||reply 22||02/28/2013|
Why wait until the second, R18 and R19?
|by Anonymous||reply 24||02/28/2013|
That's an easy question for me ...
If I had the power to make a law, I'd require that ALL elected officials be required to do their own annual income tax returns, with paper forms and a pen (No software, no professional preparer.) Want to bet you'd see REAL simplification of our tax code, really fast?? :)
As it stands, our federal elected representatives get free professional tax preparation as a Congressional benefit. They have no idea how ridiculously confusing they are making this shit, and no incentive to do otherwise.
|by Anonymous||reply 25||02/28/2013|
All hot men required by law to be naked in public.
|by Anonymous||reply 26||02/28/2013|
I would have sex with Turkey men
|by Anonymous||reply 27||02/28/2013|
All male public figures (political, sports, entertainment, etc) would be required to post cock shots. It would save me hours per week and we would truly understand some of the politics we see.
|by Anonymous||reply 28||02/28/2013|
Pass the DREAM act
Pass the American Jobs act
Repeal the Patriot act
Pass a new amendment obliterating the "Citizens United" decision, and repealing corporate "personhood".
Break up the big media companies.
|by Anonymous||reply 29||02/28/2013|
The Equal Rights Amendment.
|by Anonymous||reply 30||02/28/2013|
Ryan Gosling would be required to make gay porn.
|by Anonymous||reply 31||02/28/2013|
Any television show that labels themselves as a "news" show would be required to cite their sources and state only actual facts.
Anything that is interpretation of those facts and conclusions drawn from those facts would be clearly stated as such.
|by Anonymous||reply 32||02/28/2013|
[quote]I'd make it so that celebrities aren't paid as much as they are
So you want the people who make the money for the corporations not to get a cut of the accrued revenue, so the suits get to keep trillions made off celebrities' backs? I guess you're pro-corporate Fascism then.
|by Anonymous||reply 33||02/28/2013|
Christopher Romansky would be required to make gay porn.
|by Anonymous||reply 34||02/28/2013|
R1 40% of people who receive food stamps have full time jobs. 80% of the people who work at Walmart collect food stamps. Those people all pay taxes. If you collect unemployment benefits, you have to pay tax on those benefits. Unless you live in public housing, a person on public assistance pays property tax (either directly if they own, indirectly if they rent).
What was it Patrick Henry said about taxation without representation?
|by Anonymous||reply 35||02/28/2013|
Not quite the same thing. They actually do have representation as they can vote unless they are undocumented or felons.
|by Anonymous||reply 36||02/28/2013|
All pets would be required to be spayed or neutered after one optional breeding cycle.
Anyone who abandons a pet to an animal shelter should have to do community service for the shelter for one year, or pay for them to take the animal.
|by Anonymous||reply 37||02/28/2013|
|by Anonymous||reply 38||02/28/2013|
R21 get my vote.
|by Anonymous||reply 39||02/28/2013|
All personal assets over $1 billion would be seized.
|by Anonymous||reply 40||02/28/2013|
|by Anonymous||reply 41||02/28/2013|
R40 Are you fucking serious?
|by Anonymous||reply 42||02/28/2013|
|by Anonymous||reply 43||02/28/2013|
Reinstate the "Fairness Doctrine"
All members of congress, and all wall-street traders and all CEOs of all publicly traded corporations and all private businesses with revenues over $1Billion annually would be subjected to regular drug testing. Every positive result would require a $1million fine. Third strike means abdication of position and permanent banning from holding a similar position ever again.
Once that's in place for ten years or so, THEN we can talk about drug-testing welfare recipients.
|by Anonymous||reply 44||02/28/2013|
I would create an administrative order in my judicial circuit forcing all attorneys, members of law enforcement, witnesses, etc., to address judges as "Mary" (or possibly "Helen") instead of "Your Honor" or "Judge."
I so long to be able to say in court, "With all due respect, MARY, I object!"
|by Anonymous||reply 45||02/28/2013|
R45 I am so sick today, and you are making me laugh, MARY, which is making me cough, MARY. CMAO.
|by Anonymous||reply 46||02/28/2013|
I'm not a legal scholar, but I do indeed believe that a Supreme Court decision in favor of gay marriage would make such marriage available in every state.
I hope that lawyers will soon chime in.
|by Anonymous||reply 47||02/28/2013|
Well, I'm glad I could make you laugh, R46, but I'm sorry for causing the coughing fit. I hope you feel better.
"Come [italic]on[/italic], MARY, if you allow this line of questioning, it will only serve to inflame the jury! This is nothing other than allowing prejudice, MARY, pure and simple!"
I would be the happiest gay man in the world if I could actually say that in court.
|by Anonymous||reply 48||02/28/2013|
Sorry, wrong thread.
|by Anonymous||reply 49||02/28/2013|
I object MARY!
|by Anonymous||reply 50||02/28/2013|
I would make comprehensive sex education compulsory in all American high schools.
I'm so tired of those conservative counties in red states that legislate "abstinence only", therefore precluding any real discussion of human sexuality. Too many teen pregnancies and STDs result from such a "bury our heads in the sand" stance.
As part of the law that I propose, free condoms in all American high schools would be mandatory. "The Pill" would be freely available through gynecologists for girls over 14, with or without parental consent.
|by Anonymous||reply 51||02/28/2013|
That's really good, R51. I support your proposed law 100%.
|by Anonymous||reply 52||02/28/2013|
Term limits for congress: two terms as Senator (12 years) or six terms as Congressperson (12 years). No more career politicians.
|by Anonymous||reply 53||02/28/2013|
No member of Congress, or the Presidential Administration, shall be allowed to lobby Congress for a period of 12 years after serving in Congress.
|by Anonymous||reply 54||02/28/2013|
... or the Administration.
|by Anonymous||reply 55||02/28/2013|
The 535 people we've have sent to Washington to represent us must relinquish their current medical plan and be required to participate in ObamaCare.
|by Anonymous||reply 56||02/28/2013|
That all lawyers, judges and law students clean public toilets for free on weekends.
And that the millions in NYC pick up litter from subway tracks and trap rats too.
|by Anonymous||reply 57||02/28/2013|
Illegal to be mean to one another
|by Anonymous||reply 58||03/01/2013|
R43, do you mean, "martial law"?
|by Anonymous||reply 59||03/01/2013|
To expand on what R56 said... all laws passed by Congress must affect Congress people equally as it does the public at large. They should be required to use the same health care, have the same tax rules, follow the same laws, etc. No exceptions for them.
But beyond that, no Congress person should be allowed to invest in the stock market (it amounts to 'insider trading'), or publish books, or otherwise reap monetary benefit while in office. They need to focus on their jobs.
Too many people (mostly republicans) see election to Congress as a cash-cow, not a solemn honor and responsibility to represent their constituents.
|by Anonymous||reply 60||03/01/2013|
Can we stop lobbying?
|by Anonymous||reply 61||03/01/2013|
Tax any and every church that get in any way involved in politics.
|by Anonymous||reply 62||03/01/2013|
R59, you don't realize that "Marshall Law" is an old DL intentional misuse like pron, cak and graxy. Many people used to misuse it instead of the correct martial law, so it was affectionately adopted at DL. There even used to be an authenticated poster named Marshall Law.
|by Anonymous||reply 63||03/01/2013|
Strict limits on campaign spending for Congress along with a two-term limit for Congress.
Today, as soon as someone wins an election, their entire focus is on raising money for the next election.
|by Anonymous||reply 64||03/01/2013|
Theists are not human beings. Their mass public torture mutilation is not merely legal, but is actually required.
|by Anonymous||reply 65||03/02/2013|
Mandatory gay-sex education in High School.
|by Anonymous||reply 66||03/04/2013|
I would like to do away with all political parties.
|by Anonymous||reply 67||03/06/2013|
Death Penalty for people who park their cars diagonally across parking lines so that neighboring cars won't "ding" their doors.
|by Anonymous||reply 68||03/06/2013|
Mandatory required castration for all right-wing religious gun-nuts. Any off-spring they might have had prior to the castration would be given post-natal abortions.
|by Anonymous||reply 69||03/07/2013|
I think actors should be paid AFTER the movie opens... &/or bombs
|by Anonymous||reply 70||03/07/2013|
All those in the top 2% financially in this country would have to get all their ill gotten gains back to the USA and then give 95% of it to the poor, some directly and most to programs for the poor.
They would never again be allowed to keep anything more than 15 thousand a year so they would know what it feels like to live like those on minimum wage, SSI, low amounts of SS, etc.
They would also have to give up everything they own including most of their clothes and the food in their homes and move into slums. Seeing is how they could never again get to keep more than 15 grand a year they will never be able to move from them.
|by Anonymous||reply 71||03/07/2013|
Male nudity would be legalized. College wrestlers and swimmers just compete nude.
|by Anonymous||reply 72||03/07/2013|
... and male gymnists.
|by Anonymous||reply 73||03/08/2013|
It would be legal to kill paparazzi with your car.
|by Anonymous||reply 74||03/08/2013|
Before being able to register to vote, one would have to take a test that would determine if they have a basic understanding of how this country's government works and such. If they fail, they can't vote, but they can retake the test during the next election cycle.
|by Anonymous||reply 75||03/08/2013|
Anyone convinced that cream cheese isn't cheese but a dessert would be subjected to public stoning.
|by Anonymous||reply 76||03/14/2013|
Death penalty for making "duck face" in any photo, ever.
Retroactive to the 80s.
|by Anonymous||reply 77||03/17/2013|
R75, perhaps you should take your own test first. What you're proposing is unconstitutional.
|by Anonymous||reply 78||03/17/2013|
I'd ban Rush Limbaugh from any employment by anyone, and see how long it takes him to starve to death.
|by Anonymous||reply 79||04/16/2013|
R35 current figures make it 87% of folks on food stamps work full time.
|by Anonymous||reply 80||04/16/2013|
Not only do religious institutions lose their tax-free status in America, they would be taxed at a 75% bracket.
|by Anonymous||reply 81||04/16/2013|
Make comparative religion classes mandatory in basic school, so everybody can learn how all that stuff was fiction made up by power hungry men.
|by Anonymous||reply 82||04/16/2013|
|by Anonymous||reply 83||04/16/2013|
Institute a 2-tier public school system.
Tier 1 would be for students who use the school for its intended purpose and who treat their fellow students and teachers well. Students would have a great deal of freedom and academic standards would be high (or at least much progress from your current level would be expected). Tier 1 would be generously funded and have all sorts of (voluntary) arts and sports extracurriculars.
Tier 2 would be a boot camp style institution for the unsocialized savages that make school life impossible for their fellow students and teachers. Tier 2 would be a rigid somewhat miserable existence where your only rewards would come from academic progress and a kind and generous attitude toward peers. Students could earn their way back to tier 1 with a year or two of sustained civility. Tier 2 would have no sports.
|by Anonymous||reply 84||04/16/2013|
Animal cruelty would be a felony, not a mere misdemeanor, with harsh fines and prison time.
And maybe we get to do to the person whatever it was they did to the animal.
|by Anonymous||reply 85||04/16/2013|
Tax the church.
No more corporations buying off lawmakers.
No more incest between Big Pharma and the corrupt/inept FDA (fucking murderers).
No more direct-to-consumer advertising of Rx drugs.
If you're on public assistance = tubes tied.
No more residential property sales allowed to foreign citizens. Want to buy a house here? Get your papers.
Oh--and I'm taking away your guns.
|by Anonymous||reply 86||04/16/2013|
Break up the food monopolies and get their representatives out of the FDA. They are making us fat and sick with all the chemicals and GMOs banned in the rest of the world.
Same with banks, big pharma..
Corporations should not have influence over the regulatory agencies that oversee them. You would think this would be obvious and cause for outrage if not followed.
Lazy corporate owned media will not report on this.
|by Anonymous||reply 87||04/16/2013|
[quote]If you're on public assistance = tubes tied.
That's sexist (and likely a little racist), as well as less than effective.
|by Anonymous||reply 88||04/16/2013|
No government member may be allowed to participate in a vote to raise their own salary.
|by Anonymous||reply 89||04/16/2013|
As part of Diversity programs, universities would be required to have a Right Wing professor for ever Left Wing professor, so students will be taught both sides and not continued to be brainwashed by the Libs.
|by Anonymous||reply 90||04/16/2013|
Politicians we sent to Washington would be required to participate in ObamaCare, relinquishing the lifetime Golden Health Plan for them and their families.
|by Anonymous||reply 91||04/16/2013|
Facts and logic have a left wing bias, R90.
|by Anonymous||reply 92||04/16/2013|
R90 = ignorant moron
|by Anonymous||reply 93||04/16/2013|
Lying in politics,business or any matter of public interest or discourse would be actionable.
Oh, and complete and systemic campaign finance reform..get the goddamn lobbyists and corporate money OUT of our electoral system!
|by Anonymous||reply 94||04/16/2013|