I'm so nervous I don't know what to do. I'm meeting them for New Year's Eve dinner and then spending New Year's with them. How should I behave? Should I tell funny stories? Will they except me? Should I give them money? What should I do? I think I'm going to puke.
I'm meeting my boyfriend's family for the first time this weekend!
|by Anonymous||reply 35||02/08/2013|
What religion are you? I had my New Years a month ago.
|by Anonymous||reply 1||02/08/2013|
Chinese New Year is this weekend.
|by Anonymous||reply 3||02/08/2013|
Surprise anal for everyone !!!
|by Anonymous||reply 4||02/08/2013|
|by Anonymous||reply 5||02/08/2013|
I'm sure you'll think of something,You have over 10 months to think of it!
|by Anonymous||reply 6||02/08/2013|
Will they except you? From what?
|by Anonymous||reply 7||02/08/2013|
February has 28 days except in leap year when it has 29.
|by Anonymous||reply 8||02/08/2013|
My cat's breath smells like cat food, R8.
|by Anonymous||reply 9||02/08/2013|
Assuming the family is Asian, my experience has been that their culture respects education & looks down on those who lack it. So no, OP, they won't accept you if they see your spelling.
|by Anonymous||reply 10||02/08/2013|
Do a portion of Margaret Cho's act.
|by Anonymous||reply 11||02/08/2013|
Pour salt on all the dishes when they are brought to the table. This will show your good taste and the family will know that you respect their traditions.
|by Anonymous||reply 12||02/08/2013|
They'll take an exception to you I'm afraid.
|by Anonymous||reply 13||02/08/2013|
But should I give them money? If so, how much? And should I give only to the parents or all the relatives?
|by Anonymous||reply 14||02/08/2013|
Why do you have to give them money? Rather give the money to a hotel, and enjoy your stay there.
|by Anonymous||reply 15||02/08/2013|
Should you give them money? I'm not sure, that's an extremely sensitive topic.
|by Anonymous||reply 16||02/08/2013|
R16? It's part of the Chinese New Year tradition to hand out red envelopes or packets which contain money which is supposed to put down or suppress evil spirits.
|by Anonymous||reply 17||02/08/2013|
OP here's the usual protocol for the red packets:
Traditionally, red envelopes or red packets are passed out during the Chinese New Year's celebrations, from married couples or the elderly to unmarried juniors. It is also common for adults or young couples to give red packets to children.
|by Anonymous||reply 18||02/08/2013|
[quote] In addition to red envelopes, which are usually given from elder to younger, small gifts (usually of food or sweets) are also exchanged between friends or relatives (of different households) during Chinese New Year. Gifts are usually brought when visiting friends or relatives at their homes. Common gifts include fruits (typically oranges, and never pears), cakes, biscuits, chocolates, candies, or some other small gift.
|by Anonymous||reply 19||02/08/2013|
Oh, I see, R17, it's essentially a spiritual tradition.
|by Anonymous||reply 20||02/08/2013|
Oh great, now I have to bring gifts too? And food and sweets, fruits oranges, pears, cakes, biscuits, chocolates, and candies? Ugh, better hit Whole Foods after work today.
|by Anonymous||reply 21||02/08/2013|
Don't forget to pick up some extra special trinkets!
|by Anonymous||reply 22||02/08/2013|
Relax, OP. You'll look like a "try hard" if you do all that. Just get a few of those small (4 piece) chocolate Godiva boxes to hand out to the kids. They even have a red ribbon--perfect. Over and done.
|by Anonymous||reply 23||02/08/2013|
No pears! Fruit must be round, symbolizing endless something-or-other -- oranges are best -- no ovoid shapes like lemons or nipped in middles like pears.
I agree with R23. Nice little chocolates for the kids, & maybe a pretty bag of clementines or mandarin oranges for the hosts.
|by Anonymous||reply 24||02/08/2013|
OP are you white?
|by Anonymous||reply 25||02/08/2013|
Um, here's a bright idea, Einstein: why don't you ask your boyfriend what is customary, and what is expected of you as their son's boyfriend.
Are you impaired in some way?
|by Anonymous||reply 26||02/08/2013|
I'm not going to go as far as saying he's impaired, he might just be extraordinarily slow today for some reason.
|by Anonymous||reply 27||02/08/2013|
Make sure your anus is sparkling clean
|by Anonymous||reply 28||02/08/2013|
It is possible this is the OP first boyfriend.
|by Anonymous||reply 29||02/08/2013|
It will be OK rice queen.
|by Anonymous||reply 30||02/08/2013|
Well, this is quite educational. I had no idea. I think R18 & R19, R23 & R24 are correct. As far as your behavior,just smile, make brief comments, ask polite questions, and be a good listener.
You don't have to run around with a stupid grin plastered on your face every minute, but you can look pleasant, can't you. Shift the focus from you to them. And above all, be polite, and relax. You'll be fine.
One thing I've learned. It is always good to ask a question when you are unfamiliar with the culture. People appreciate that. Strike a balance between showing that you have made some effort to familiarize yourself about their traditions, but also feel comfortable enough to ask.
They will delight in helping you and explaining things. Most people are very proud of their culture and like to tell their stories. If they see a sincere effort on your part, they'll be very generous.
Now, it's possible you may encounter a stand offish, surly type, but always remember. Those people are like that even when you aren't around. It's not you, it's them. Just be polite to them and if they rebuff attempts at conversation, move on but don't completely ignore them. Just be polite & pleasant as you would to strangers.
So, candy, and maybe red envelopes for the kids, oranges or clementines for the grown ups, (maybe some cookies?) and be nice.
Have fun, OP. Really do.
|by Anonymous||reply 31||02/08/2013|
OP, just stay home this weekend.
|by Anonymous||reply 32||02/08/2013|
Eat Long Noodles and ROUND oranges.
|by Anonymous||reply 33||02/08/2013|
[quote]They will delight in helping you and explaining things. Most people are very proud of their culture and like to tell their stories. If they see a sincere effort on your part, they'll be very generous.
Make them tell stories? Are you serious? Like they speak English.
|by Anonymous||reply 34||02/08/2013|
Do not put anything in writing, OP. If they see that you don't know the difference between accept and except, they will except you.
|by Anonymous||reply 35||02/08/2013|