Responding to the poster who said this:
hi psych 101,
glad that you've come back. i've re-edited my original post to reflect the changes.
i posted as sanguine (#173) on the old thread.
i've had to live through extreme stress for the past 6 years (death of my mother, death of beloved pets, loss of my home and severe financial stress).
my precious little rescue dog died in oct. he was 13. i've had messages that he wants to come back to me as another dog.
i hope that i can find him again.
i feel like i have lost myself -- who i was.
will i ever be able to resurrect my creative life?
do you see happiness and success in my life sometime soon?
i have a new BF who has moved from out of state to be near me. i'm not sure whether we'll make it as a couple. should we live together and where?
thank you. sanguine --------------------------------------- Hi Sanguine,
Thanks for being patient. This flu is no joke, but I think I've seen the worst of it.
Let's get to it.
I want to start with the new BF. I feel like this is a connection for you that is about learning, not love. Don't get me wrong and don't do anything rash. This COULD be the one, or A one - something lasting. Definitely. However, it will ultimately be about the lessons you need to learn to get to a higher place in your life. Have fun, trust him. It's even okay to settle in and get comfortable. However, love and appreciate this relationship for what it is in the moment at all times, and when the time is right for it to end - let it go. You'll know, and you'll be prepared. But, enjoy the ride.
Let's talk about the dog. Here's the thing with dogs . . . when they're gone, they're gone. That energy goes back into the larger pool and goes on to wherever we go when we go. I don't want to give you false hope and make you feel better by lying to you. However, I will guarantee you there is another dog out there that will bring light and laughter and joy to your life. I'm seeing a fluffier dog . . . possibly a havanese, definitely from a rescue. The name Jinx is on my mind. Don't let the longing for what was preclude you from the love that could be.
About the loss in your life . . .
When did you lose yourself? I don't feel that you were that happy with the person you were or you would be fighting desperately to retain that person. I think you have allowed yourself to exist as a blank slate, letting the world write its story on you and not the other way round.
You need to write your story on the world, babycakes. Snap. Out. Of. It. Become who you feel you were born to be - that person who you dream of being but tell yourself you could never be. Life is ending one second at a time, and how you choose to invest those seconds will either move you closer to becoming that person or keep you sitting exactly where you are right now.
So, if you need training - take classes. If you need a better body - hit the gym. If you want fun friends - put yourself out there.
You are going to struggle. You are going to take hits and get knocked down and ask yourself if it is worth it . . . and then I want you in those moments to remember who you are right now, who you have been the last year and ask yourself if you're prepared to do this again for the rest of your life. Then, my love, get back up on your feet and press onward.
You have this glorious gift of life and there is something substantive and powerful about you that you've kept locked up for fear of being rejected and mocked. It is time, and you know it's time. You don't need me or anybody else to tell you - the key is to decide you want it more than you want anything else.
I love ya. I want the best for ya, and I hope you get it.