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From a text: Sorry I was super drink last night I honestly can remember that much. Who is this?

Not such an auspicious start to a romance

by Eldergayreply 4401/30/2013

"I generally don't get sloppy - but I think I took a Zanex (sic) or something"

by Eldergayreply 101/28/2013

I think the only proper response to something like that is "Never mind."

by Eldergayreply 201/28/2013

Did you notice how drunk he was when you met? I mean, this sort of thing happens when you hit on people who are trashed.

by Eldergayreply 301/28/2013

Sorry to hear that, OP.

Texting and sexting are often for the birds, as the older generations would say. I try to abide by the rationale that if I wouldn't say it to someone in person, I won't text it.

Reminds me of an interesting story told to me by a hot, hung married bi guy I chatted with recently.

We were watching a super-hung, gay-friendly blond straight dude on cam4 who I often view and chat with. Bi guy messaged me, showed me his buff bod & huge dick, asked a few questions about str8 boy, and playfully suggested we get a 12-pack and head over to str8's apartment to "initiate" him. I suggested Jagermeister, instead. He laughed and told me his story of having his cherry popped in his dorm room, thanks to Jager.

A couple of college buddies brought some Jager to his dorm room, got him drunk, and stole his virginity. He said he was totally fucked up, doesn't remember a damn thing, and his asshole was sore for a week. He awakened in his bed, naked, with empty bottles of Jager and lube, condom wrappers, and his cum-soaked socks.

I'm sorry that my ass was first fucked by a handsome construction worker who picked me up in a bar and not by a lover, but at least I remember every detail of what happened that night 20 years ago!

Drugs and alcohol are bad!

by Eldergayreply 401/28/2013

[quote]Did you notice how drunk he was when you met?

NO! he seemed totally lucid and just happy, we chatted about my city where I live and NYC, contrasting and comparing. He was articulate about his new job which he was enthusiastic for.

then we made out and it was fun. He's a bit on the young side so I wasn't holding a torch, but this text struck me as odd. Maybe he's just not that into me

by Eldergayreply 501/28/2013

[quote]Drugs and alcohol are bad!

yes, indeed.

by Eldergayreply 601/28/2013

well, he was a gayling, tall and hunky but a drunk numbskull gayling apparently.

by Eldergayreply 801/28/2013


PLEASE stop using "eldergay" and "gayling"!

Unless he was under 12 or so, he wasn't a -ling anything.

OP, since you label yourself and your date, I am curious how old you and the numbskull are.


by Eldergayreply 901/28/2013


by Eldergayreply 1001/28/2013

OMG, if someone texted that to me I would delete and be done with him. A. If he drank so much that he had a blackout, PROBLEM. B. If you made such a poor impression on him that he can't remember you. PROBLEM. And if the best scenario you can HOPE for is "A," Dealbreaker.

by Eldergayreply 1101/28/2013

Well, doesn't that all rather depend on how hot the guy is, R11?

by Eldergayreply 1201/28/2013

[quote] PLEASE stop using "eldergay" and "gayling"!

I don't have a problem with those terms, when used by a gay man.

by Eldergayreply 1301/28/2013

Those replies are total BS. Forget him OP, he's an asshole. And, if he's an older dude, he's a loser. Don't waste your time.

by Eldergayreply 1401/28/2013

He would have lost me at "super drink".

by Eldergayreply 1501/28/2013

R12, um, NO. Actually, the "hotter" the guy, the more likely he IS an asshole/douchebag, exponentially. I have this little thing called self esteem. Works wonders.

by Eldergayreply 1601/28/2013

He had a super douche-y friend with him, that was the REAL deal-breaker.

I might have some tolerance for young, dumb, drunk studs but if they always have irritating cunty friends tagging along, AND black out, Fuggedaboutit!

by Eldergayreply 1701/28/2013

Yeah... so many red flags there.

Given you didn't notice he was that drunk, he's either a liar, or a highly functional alcoholic. Even worse is this: "I think I took a Zanex" ... he doesn't even KNOW if he took a drug or not? (one he can't even spell)

If you respond at all, "Never mind" is probably the best option of the ones that come to mind.

by Eldergayreply 1801/28/2013

DO NOT text him "Nevermind" You will be missing a brilliant opportunity to wreak havoc on a douchey young gayling.

C'mon bitches, help a sister out. I'm thinking something like...

"LOL! Thanks for the rimjob lastnight and I promise to send you a copy of Sweating to the Oldies!

Richard Simmons

by Eldergayreply 1901/28/2013

OP, are you the guy who fell in love with the stripper?

by Eldergayreply 2001/28/2013

From the title, I thought you were talking about former Senator Brown

by Eldergayreply 2101/28/2013

[quote]"LOL! Thanks for the rimjob lastnight and I promise to send you a copy of Sweating to the Oldies


No, r20, I'm not. I generally avoid younger guys any way.

by Eldergayreply 2201/28/2013

Damn! I thought this was going to be some great gossip about OP meeting up with Scott Brown at the baths.

by Eldergayreply 2301/28/2013

Nope, I wish.

by Eldergayreply 2401/28/2013

r4, that never happened. He might have been describing a "fantasy", but your describing rape.

by Eldergayreply 2501/28/2013

rape can be a fantasy

by Eldergayreply 2601/28/2013

R18, I'm simply describing exactly what the bi guy told me, I failed to mention that he willingly got naked & sexually active with his buddies, and I believe his anecdote because of how my own cherry was popped. It left my ass hurting for quite a while.

I haven't been posting here long, but so many years after losing my virginity I'm more comfortable talking about what few friends have been told. However, I still avoid using the term rape.

At what point does consensual sex stop being sex and turn into rape? You're sniffing around a very sensitive topic.

When I was the 19 y/o college student and agreed to have sex with the hot older construction worker named Trey, in no way, shape, or form did I intend to have, or consent to have, receptive anal sex. I was "saving myself" for a partner.

When we arrived at Trey's hotel room, everything was fine other than my obvious nervousness since it was also the 1st time I'd "hooked up" that way and that such a hot man had approached me; I attended Catholic school & led a sheltered life. The fun, innocent experiences I had with school buddies were not "real sex."

Although I was nearly 6'2"/180 and an avid tennis player & cyclist at the time, Trey was about 5'9" but far more powerful than me.

While I was blowing him he turned to pull my legs in the air, scooped up my puddle of pre-cum from my belly, and started playing with my butt...felt great because that was my 1st real experience with that.

I was willing to let him play around down there, but upon realizing that he was trying to penetrate me I firmly said "no, I can't do that...I've never bottomed." He became more aggressive and started pounding away while I physically fought back; he became more excited & determined while I was terrified. I was certain that my screams & cries would summon (or cause some to call) hotel security or police, but no one ever arrived.

No matter how hard I fought back & tried to push him away, he held me down until he came. Of course I bled and tried to clean up & collect myself in the bathroom, but I was numb. The thought of going to an E.R. and/or calling police didn't cross my mind because I was traumatized and later rationalized that I had agreed to go to his hotel & have sex. I didn't want to be fucked without a kiss again. Also, I was concerned about an STD even though he confirmed using a condom.

Trey's intent, which he did not disclose, was to fuck me whether I agreed to it or not.

So R18, was I raped or did I learn an important adult lesson about having sex with strangers?

by Eldergayreply 2701/28/2013

sounds like last night

by Eldergayreply 2801/28/2013

[quote]was I raped or did I learn an important adult lesson about having sex with strangers?

Of course it wasn't rape. He meant to show you the joys of m2m sex.

Maybe it's time for you to create another tale. Your question about "was I raped" moved it into the total fiction shelf.

by Eldergayreply 2901/28/2013

What's the Matter with Gilbert Rape?

by Eldergayreply 3001/28/2013

Uhhh, yeah. I was the 4th guy who fucked you and we were all just wanting to know if you wanted a copy of the movie we made, too.

by Eldergayreply 3101/29/2013


by Eldergayreply 3201/29/2013

Your pitiful attempt at armchair psychology & "validation" is not needed, R29. Are you also R18, to whom my question was directed in the first place?

Since you don't have the required mental capacity to answer appropriately, the answer to my question is "both."

I was raped and everything I posted is true. Since it was not mentioned, both of us were sober; I do not drink alcohol.

Too many gay men, given the opportunity like Trey, would force themselves into a teenage virgin, shred his asshole & leave it bleeding, then attempt to justify it as "teaching him the joys of m2m sex." I've overheard frequent, sick conversations about this topic, full of bragging & laughter. Then you hypocrites post threads here gossiping about & criticizing celebrities for doing less than what you & your friends have done!

One of the reasons I rarely discuss the night's events leading up to my assault is precisely because of twisted attitudes like yours, R29. When I have talked to virgins or clueless individuals such as yourself, this is the bottom line:

No means NO, period!

by Eldergayreply 3301/29/2013

r33, you're the literary genius who at r27 described being raped and then very cleverly asked "was I raped...."

No doubt, you were looking for "Oh, you poor thing. My heart goes out" but your twisted attempt at great literature erased any compassion one would have a victim of such a horrendous crime.

by Eldergayreply 3401/29/2013

R33, sorry people are so callous to victims of sexual abuse. I am with you 100%. It was rape. But you need to talk about it more, rather than less. Let people get pissed off at you. They might go away on their own and secretly second guess their abusive ideas and actions. This possibility makes it worth talking more. You could prevent others from getting raped.

We live in a world that is too comfortable taking what it wants regardless of harm to others. Precisely because there are not consequences for perpetrators.

by Eldergayreply 3501/29/2013

meanwhile. . ..

the stupid guy texted me:

"hey hansome, wanna get high tonight?"

by Eldergayreply 3601/29/2013

Gayling is to Datalounge as fetch is to Mean Girls.

After I saw them uttered in movies and TV shows, I realized "eldergay" and "frau" entered pop culture.

by Eldergayreply 3701/29/2013

OP, do you drink to get drink? I love it when drink cute men get affectionate when drink, I like hugging them and smacking their asses as much as I want, it makes them drinkenly giggle.

by Eldergayreply 3801/29/2013

Please get in touch with me, R27. Confronting your rapist is the best way to start dealing with what happened to you.

by Eldergayreply 3901/29/2013

Hey, I just met you,

And this is crazzy,

But here's my number,

But if you call me, maybe . . .. ?

by Eldergayreply 4001/29/2013

To be fair, he did after all say "I can remember that much", so at least you made a good impression on him.

by Eldergayreply 4101/30/2013

What is the age difference here, OP?

If it's more than 15 years, then you should really not have thought this was any kind of 'romance'...

by Eldergayreply 4201/30/2013

I'm sorry, but how do the posts at R4 and R27 have ANYTHING to do with OP's little story?

Not to belittle the topic of rape, but that's not the topic of the thread.

by Eldergayreply 4301/30/2013

Of course it's more than 15 years, and of course I didn't take it seriously.

It's just the way that he presented his young ignorance that astounded me.

by Eldergayreply 4401/30/2013
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