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The most common lies you find on dating and hookup sites

1.Here's a recent picture of me! (Translation: Here's a picture of me in 1995)

2.I'm 6 feet tall! (Translation: I'm 5'10")

3.People say I'm attractive (Translation: People say I'm attractive...when they're standing ten feet away and it's dark out)

What else?

by Anonymousreply 8201/17/2013

VGL means AVG

by Anonymousreply 101/10/2013

I don't go to dating and hookup sites.

by Anonymousreply 201/10/2013

"Ï don't usually do this ..."

by Anonymousreply 301/10/2013

"I'm bored"

by Anonymousreply 401/10/2013

Their picture

by Anonymousreply 501/10/2013


by Anonymousreply 601/10/2013

"I like to skydive and go whitewater rafting on weekends"

by Anonymousreply 701/10/2013


by Anonymousreply 801/10/2013

"I'm sane"

by Anonymousreply 901/10/2013

I read these things and I think, Wow, everyone's out hiking!

by Anonymousreply 1001/10/2013

"I'm neg"

by Anonymousreply 1101/10/2013

"I'm a nice guy" almost always means that you're great at rationalizing borderline sociopathic behavior. When I see that phrase, I avoid.

by Anonymousreply 1201/10/2013

I have a GF that is out of town

by Anonymousreply 1301/10/2013

"I wrestle at 125 on my hs team" = wrestle at 160.

by Anonymousreply 1401/10/2013

r12, have you read the "Nice guys of OKCupid" blog?

by Anonymousreply 1501/10/2013

Recently got this one:

"I'm a man with discerning tastes and into quality. I'm a classy, masculine man and that's what I seek in a partner. Equiped with a virgin ass that will yeild to the right man."

All typos are original. Basically, Liberace, right? hehe

by Anonymousreply 1601/10/2013

32 inch waist.Yeah right.

by Anonymousreply 1701/10/2013

My wife won't do certain things I enjoy.

by Anonymousreply 1801/10/2013

D&D free

by Anonymousreply 1901/10/2013

Not a lie, but common is when guys who have zero pictures posted and couldn't be bothered to fill out their profile send this email:

Hot! Got any more pics?

by Anonymousreply 2001/10/2013

[quote]I'm a man with discerning tastes and into quality. I'm a classy, masculine man and that's what I seek in a partner. Equiped with a virgin ass that will yeild to the right man

What's he means by "discerning tastes" is they have to have a dick.

And who's got a virgin ass anymore?

by Anonymousreply 2101/10/2013

"x" inches. Why do people make up this shit? An exaggerated number makes me more likely to click him off.

by Anonymousreply 2201/10/2013

I'm fit fat!

by Anonymousreply 2301/10/2013

"'I wrestle at 125 on my hs team' = wrestle at 160."

I have no idea what this means.

by Anonymousreply 2401/10/2013

"I'm an athlete" = "Haven't played sports since high school"

by Anonymousreply 2501/11/2013

"Football-player build" = "So morbidly obese I have to bathe with a washrag on a stick"

by Anonymousreply 2601/11/2013

I'm picky...

... Yet on grindr

by Anonymousreply 2701/11/2013

"Not a bottom but really would like to try it with the right guy"

by Anonymousreply 2801/11/2013

r28, you need to get out more.

If there were no tops then no one would ever get laid.

by Anonymousreply 2901/11/2013

I'm 42 yo and have never been with a guy= I'm 52 and havnt been with a guy since this morning.

by Anonymousreply 3001/12/2013


"straight acting"

Big old Mary bottoms who won't admit they love meth, Gaga and cock.

by Anonymousreply 3101/13/2013

I like this guy's. Typical of a male, he wants all the goodies of a relationship, but none of the responsibility or work involved.

by Anonymousreply 3201/13/2013

40's is really late forties to mid 50's Discreet, except the pictures I post of my face and dick all over the internet Another mention for "football player build". That always means fat.

by Anonymousreply 3301/13/2013

Jock. This one confuses me, that so many gays refer to themselves as "jocks". To me a jock is a dumb oaf who plays sports, could be skinny, fat, built, etc. But gays interpret jock to mean anyone who works out, or runs, or hell, has a gym membership.

by Anonymousreply 3401/13/2013

R34 Or anyone who owns a jockstrap!

by Anonymousreply 3501/13/2013

Can't believe this one hasn't been mentioned but...

______ (age) but look ______ (age minus 10)

(of course, the first age itself is probably at least five years off)

by Anonymousreply 3601/13/2013

R21, I have a "virgin" ass, but I am not advertising it on craigslist. It will still be "virgin" when I die.

by Anonymousreply 3701/13/2013

"Partnered / not looking for hookups" (this seen on a Grindr profile featuring the man's naked torso)

"Just checking things out"

"Looking for the guy who'll get me to delete my Grindr profile!" (seen that one repeatedly)

"Discrete" (sp) ... even though I have my face plastered on a gay hookup app

Not a "lie" per se, but if they're wearing a cap in their pic, 99 times out of 100 they're bald

by Anonymousreply 3801/13/2013

I like the fat guys who post pictures of themselves and tell you number of times they go to the gym per week.

by Anonymousreply 3901/13/2013

9" Thick cock

by Anonymousreply 4001/13/2013

Just want to be friends. No sex. Then post naked pictures of themselves with legs up in the air or on all fours and butt checks spread. Huh?

by Anonymousreply 4101/13/2013

Looking to explore or try something new. This is my first time (translation = this week) or strictly a top but with right (translation = any man) man I might bottom.

by Anonymousreply 4201/13/2013

Versatile = I bottom and I knit!

by Anonymousreply 4301/15/2013

"I'm a curvy gal" translates to "I weigh 250 or more and there are no curves, just fat rolls".

by Anonymousreply 4401/15/2013

Oh, I love the guys who say they're 'masculine' and are only looking for 'masculine' guys, and then their eyebrows are perfectly arched and they have on guyscara.

by Anonymousreply 4501/15/2013

No one over 40 (when they list their age at 42 and joined 5 years ago lol)

Non Smoker - smokes No Drugs - I just use tina Anything Goes - I have hep c and now so do you

Open Relationship - I am allowed to see other people as long as he does not find out.

Can only meet at your place - married

by Anonymousreply 4601/15/2013

This has happened a few times to me. Someone contacts me and their profile says they drink often and take drugs. When I tell them that's a deal breaker they respond by saying, "Oh, I just put that in there as a joke."

by Anonymousreply 4701/15/2013

"no Drama' = don't be like my last three failed attempts at a relationship

by Anonymousreply 4801/15/2013

The guy claiming to be versatile and once you entertain a conversation about a possible meeting they start to manipulate you into what THEY are looking for. They are bottoms, have no interest in anything except their assholes and getting filled up with all the dick they can get. Don't get me wrong, if you have a hot ass or just an ass that appeals to me I am a fucker. Will fuck that night and day and more. If I don't like your ass I am not a fucker. Not wanting to fuck you doesn't mean I don't want to do other things with you. If someone is truly versatile there is no need for a specific conversation about what exactly your meeting might entail.

by Anonymousreply 4901/15/2013

R48 is right. If you have to mention drama...

by Anonymousreply 5001/15/2013

"work hard, play hard." Usually, they do neither of those things.

by Anonymousreply 5101/15/2013

Safe sex only!!!!! No exceptions!!!

Unless you're neg...

by Anonymousreply 5201/15/2013

"Can only meet at your place - married"

Yep! Also, any guy who is wary of posting photos of himself is married and/or closeted (this happened to me, I hooked up with a guy who was "locally famous" and a married closet case)

by Anonymousreply 5301/15/2013

Discreet, married, so don't post my pics= I'm ugly so hopefully you'll fall for my bs, and once you do see me, you'll be too horny/tired to call it off.

by Anonymousreply 5401/15/2013

I have to wonder. Do the guys who post no pictures ever hook up? Who would agree to talk to someone let alone meet them without knowing what they look like?

by Anonymousreply 5501/15/2013

I can't post pics because I have to be discreet usually means I'm really unattractive and if you saw my pic, you'd shoot me down.

by Anonymousreply 5601/15/2013

[quote]This has happened a few times to me. Someone contacts me and their profile says they drink often and take drugs. When I tell them that's a deal breaker they respond by saying, "Oh, I just put that in there as a joke."

Yeah a similar thing happened to me. Got invited to chat by a 27-year-old and I told him that he was unlikely to be my type as I like older guys. He then writes back saying that he was actually 43 and he had simply forgotten to update the age on his ad.

by Anonymousreply 5701/15/2013

[quote]Do the guys who post no pictures ever hook up? Who would agree to talk to someone let alone meet them without knowing what they look like?

Sometimes you have to take a chance... but, of course, meet in public first. My hottest regular buddy was a guy with no pictures, but he sent me a message that hit all the right buttons and the more we emailed back and forth the more we realized we were looking for the same thing, so, it was worth taking the risk for me. We had a hot affair of meeting once or twice a week for 7 months straight until work transferred him out of town. Hottest sex I've ever had.

by Anonymousreply 5801/15/2013

R55, yes those guys do get hits. I even tried that theory out...

I created a fake profile with no pics. In the text, I wrote something like: Straight guy here with serious GF. I'm VGL and masculine. Not into gay guys, only looking for other straight guys to suck my big dick. Don't ask for pics because you won't get them. Total alpha straight male here. Only into very masculine guys.

I got lots of replies from self-loathing gays who believed (or desperately wanted to believe) everything I said.

by Anonymousreply 5901/15/2013

R58= posts no pics on his profile so comes up with a story encouraging others to hook up with guys who don't post pics because it will result in the "hottest sex."

by Anonymousreply 6001/15/2013

Stocky, linebacker-build, hefty, large, big.

You're fat. Just say so.

by Anonymousreply 6101/15/2013

"Been told I'm good-looking" = Yes, by my mother and my students at the school for the blind.

"Nice guy" = Life's doormat

"Yo Bro, s'up?" = Spoken by an over the hill A&F wearing, Eminem listening White Party reject

"Top" = Bottom

"Bottom" = Top (surprise!)

by Anonymousreply 6201/15/2013

I don't know if this is necessarily a lie, but it seems to me that for as many as like "romantic walks along the beach", the beaches would be like Grand Central Station!

by Anonymousreply 6301/15/2013

Only play safe = drinking gallons of jizz.

by Anonymousreply 6401/15/2013

[quote][R58]= posts no pics on his profile

Believe what you want to.

by Anonymousreply 6501/15/2013

"Looking for LTR"

I want to stalk someone for two weeks until I find enough defects to move on. All of our dates will seem like job interviews.

I will constantly tell you how 'wealthy' I am. Please don't notice my cheap shoes or the fact I eat like a savage.

We're about the same age, but I probably won't settle for you. The cocks I ride on the side are usually very young, dumb, and poor.

by Anonymousreply 6601/15/2013

"Frat boy" = 30-something

"Straight-acting" = Richard Simmons lookalike

by Anonymousreply 6701/15/2013

I don't understand why everyone on here is so rude? Were people not taught any manners?= Will only respond to extremely hot guys and ignore anyone who doesn't meet their hotness standard.

Hate drama= that doesn't center around ME.

by Anonymousreply 6801/15/2013

R63 "I like the idea of you imagining me strolling on a beach, hiking, surfing while kayaking, and white water river rafting."

by Anonymousreply 6901/15/2013

"D/D free" = Undetectable viral load, as long as I didn't have a meth binge this week.

by Anonymousreply 7001/15/2013

[quote]Versatile = I bottom and I knit!

He's only truly versatile if he bottoms WHILE knitting.

by Anonymousreply 7101/15/2013

I'll be honest, I have met some really hot guys that wouldn't send a picture. Sometimes it is worth taking a chance, you can always walk away, I have several times when someone's picture was so outdated and inaccurate. "sorry, I'm just not feeling it."

by Anonymousreply 7201/15/2013

This is going to be hard for you old Primetimers to believe but most people never go to online dating sites.

by Anonymousreply 7301/15/2013

Maybe I'm not selective enough, but I don't have a problem with 5' 10" becoming a full six feet. Big Deal!

by Anonymousreply 7401/15/2013

Yeah, but you probably have a problem with 4 inches becoming 8.

by Anonymousreply 7501/15/2013

"I don't have any pics of my cock, but I've never had any complaints."

Then, you meet them and realize they probably never had any compliments on it either. I ain't sucking that thang.

by Anonymousreply 7601/15/2013

I meet guys online all the time (yeah I am a whore so what)...I only have pics of my cock because I am pretty well hung and get attention from guys looking for that. I'm in good shape all that blah blah blah and truly versatile..the biggest lie I have seen is dick size. I get a lot of big dick tops all wanting to fuck know the ones who have 9" or more listed. I always make a deal with them..if my cock is bigger than yours I get to fuck you..only lost that bet once lol.

by Anonymousreply 7701/15/2013

r77, I had a guy tell me he was 8.5 inches. When I met him I pulled up to him when we were both erect and my dick was an inch bigger than his (I'm 7). I called him out on it and he insisted that I must be 9.5 inches and that I had measured wrong, not him.

by Anonymousreply 7801/15/2013

[quote]This is going to be hard for you old Primetimers to believe but most people never go to online dating sites.

So where do they go R73?

by Anonymousreply 7901/15/2013

R79- the answer is Dennys during the old geezer grand slam breakfast morning special

by Anonymousreply 8001/17/2013

This is a really funny thread.

by Anonymousreply 8101/17/2013

"Just looking for friends" = if you are half way decent looking I will take your load.

by Anonymousreply 8201/17/2013
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