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Asking for a Dutch oven.

How can one be clear when asking for such a thing.

by Anonymousreply 5203/06/2015

Find a photo on the net. Take it to the store.

by Anonymousreply 101/07/2013

Erm, I'd love to think that's the kind of Dutch oven OP is talking about, but I kinda doubt it.

by Anonymousreply 201/07/2013

R2, perhaps he's trying to find the perfect set of sheets that don't breathe...

by Anonymousreply 301/07/2013

Don't ask, apologize.

by Anonymousreply 401/07/2013

How gross.

by Anonymousreply 501/07/2013

Don't ask. Just give him food poisoning and invite him to spend the night.

by Anonymousreply 601/07/2013

Dutch oven is a euphemism for gay sex.

by Anonymousreply 701/07/2013

Inquire, "how many does your oven seat?"

by Anonymousreply 801/07/2013

R7 has no idea what a Dutch oven really is. And no, it has nothing to do with kitchen equipment.

by Anonymousreply 901/07/2013

I adore both types!

by Anonymousreply 1001/07/2013

I have a cast iron dutch oven. I love it, range top to oven no problem.

I would like to get some Le Creuset stuff though.

by Anonymousreply 1101/07/2013

Wow, R7. You really are stupid. You're a stupid, stupid person. Stop embarrassing yourself by posting here. Go back to community college.

by Anonymousreply 1201/07/2013

I think Ethel Merman made it quite clear to Ernest Borgnine.

by Anonymousreply 1301/07/2013

It's close to gay sex

[quote]Dutch Oven: The act of trapping a person under bed covers after releasing vile ass fumes Dave vomited on the sheets when his wife gave him a white castle dutch oven.

by Anonymousreply 1401/07/2013

Serve up some cabbage and beans and you should have no problem...

by Anonymousreply 1501/07/2013

This thread is too funny.

by Anonymousreply 1601/13/2013

Ethel Merman and Ernest Borgnine will be mentioned in 3... 2... 1...

by Anonymousreply 1701/13/2013

Are there any expressions with positive references to the Dutch?

Going Dutch Dutch courage Dutch oven Dutch uncle

by Anonymousreply 1801/13/2013

Dearest fucktard at R7:

Dutch Oven is shorthand for a couple in bed where person 1 farts (ideally, an event that happens while person 2's head is under the covers).

by Anonymousreply 1901/13/2013

Name calling is really rude.

Here's some definitions, r7!

by Anonymousreply 2001/13/2013

[quote] Name calling is really rude.

You're new here, aren't you?

by Anonymousreply 2101/13/2013

Can someone explain the Merman/Borgnine reference?

by Anonymousreply 2201/13/2013

Apparently, Merman divorced Borgnine (after only 32 day) 'cause he gave her one Dutch oven too many.

by Anonymousreply 2301/13/2013

Also called a covered wagon....

by Anonymousreply 2401/15/2013

Make sure to serve this to your guest with a heady yet supple shartanay.

by Anonymousreply 2501/15/2013

Can someone seriously tell me what a Russian candy cane is? I'm stumped.

by Anonymousreply 2601/15/2013

^ I've recently had one of those in my new homeland, R26. Chocolate-covered.

by Anonymousreply 2701/15/2013

I had a DL giggle moment when my mom brought out her new Le Creuset and called it a Dutch oven. I asked her what she was going to cook in it and she said, "BEANS!" - and then I lost it completely.

by Anonymousreply 2801/16/2013

For R26

by Anonymousreply 2901/30/2013

Baseball player Anthony Recker loves to give his stupid Christian fiancee a Dutch oven in bed at night, forcing her to gag on the delicious vile gases emitted from his lower bowel.

by Anonymousreply 3008/04/2013

When you do a dutch oven and accidentally shit, it's standard protocol to say "honey, I burnt the turkey"

by Anonymousreply 3108/04/2013

[quote]Apparently, Merman divorced Borgnine (after only 32 day) 'cause he gave her one Dutch oven too many.

Are you sure? I've heard that story before but with the names reversed.

by Anonymousreply 3208/04/2013

When I was in college, one of my professors who was also a psychotherapist thought it was "immature" of the wife to make an issue of her husband putting her in Dutch oven situation. She told this to a classroom of several hundred people. She thought the wife lacked a "sense of humor" or playfulness.

I think I would rather get a divorce than have that kind of sense of humor.

by Anonymousreply 3308/04/2013

Husband Convicted Of Manslaughter After Dutch Oven Goes "Horribly Wrong"

Mr Brian Flannery was convicted of 2nd Degree Manslaughter today at Peckham Crown Court, receiving a 5 year suspended sentence for the accidental death of his wife, Gloria Flannery, by toxic suffocation, after he gave her a 'Dutch Oven' that went, as the Judge described it, 'horribly, horribly wrong'.

.....They argued that Mr Flannery had miscalculated two crucial factors which led to the tragic outcome. The first being Mrs Flannery's military tucking in of the 600 weight cotton sheets when she made the bed that morning, which created a near airtight seal . Secondly, Mr Flannery had neglected to remember that he had attended a long business lunch at an Indian restaurant on Brick Lane that day, at which he had consumed a dozen onion Bajees, eight Poppadom, six Samosas, and an extra large beef Vindaloo with garlic naan, all washed down with 8 pints of Guinness beer. The resulting trapped wind, which he released within a 6 inch proximity of Mrs Flannery's face, came in at around 6 litres gas of 95% methane by volume.

by Anonymousreply 3403/04/2015

This is not a hoax, folks. Scientists out of the University of Exeter believe that smelling farts actually prevents cancer, among other diseases.

"Although hydrogen sulfide gas"—produced when bacteria breaks down food—"is well known as a pungent, foul-smelling gas in rotten eggs and flatulence, it is naturally produced in the body and could in fact be a healthcare hero with significant implications for future therapies for a variety of diseases," Dr. Mark Wood said in a university release.

Although the stinky gas can be noxious in large doses, scientists believe that a whiff here and there has the power to reduce risks of cancer, strokes, heart attacks, arthritis, and dementia by preserving mitochondria.

Researchers are even coming up with their own compound to emulate the smell's health benefits.

"We have exploited this natural process by making a compound, called AP39, which slowly delivers very small amounts of this gas specifically to the mitochondria," Professor Matt Whiteman, of the University of Exeter Medical School said. "Our results indicate that if stressed cells are treated with AP39, mitochondria are protected and cells stay alive."

So instead of getting upset the next time you catch a whiff... be thankful.

by Anonymousreply 3503/04/2015

[quote]Scientists Say Smelling Farts Prevents Cancer

I'm gonna live forever!

by Anonymousreply 3603/04/2015


by Anonymousreply 3703/04/2015

[quote]Asking for a Dutch oven. How can one be clear when asking for such a thing.

Nonchalantly leave a catalog for Williams Smellaroma lying around?

by Anonymousreply 3803/04/2015

This doesn't sound gay to me, it's simply gross. I doubt even twisted people would be turned on with something like this. Germany tried to make this popular in the 1940's with natural gas as their cleansing agent, but all 8 million human trials ended in disaster. Perseverance can also be a bad thing.

by Anonymousreply 3903/04/2015

Well, smell you, Mary!


by Anonymousreply 4003/05/2015

Is a dutch oven about the same as Wolfgans Puck's low pressure oven? My neighbor has one and she does say, it stinks.

by Anonymousreply 4103/05/2015

They used to be called German ovens. After WWII, not so much.

by Anonymousreply 4203/05/2015

The Germans almost doomed the development for a home microwave oven when they built that one that could seal 150. I guess that's when "cooking with gas' became so popular again.

by Anonymousreply 4303/05/2015

Sounds like something the Nazis killed Jews with.

by Anonymousreply 4403/05/2015

Anything that normally cooks in a Dutch oven would cook in one third the time in a pressure cooker.

That's what you really want, 0P.

Some of the European models are truly beautiful.

by Anonymousreply 4503/05/2015

[quote]They used to be called German ovens. After WWII, not so much.

Never heard this, but it it's true, it likely would've happened after WWI, not WWII.

by Anonymousreply 4603/05/2015

Is this a cooking thread?

by Anonymousreply 4703/05/2015

[quote]Is this a cooking thread?

For those who can't be bothered to read.

by Anonymousreply 4803/05/2015

Is this a thing now?

by Anonymousreply 4903/05/2015

Will someone kindly explain who this Mr. Dirty Sanchez is?

by Anonymousreply 5003/05/2015

I'm going to Ohio next week. Where's a good place to get a Cleveland Steamer? Are they only available in Cleveland?

by Anonymousreply 5103/05/2015

If you have some Cincinnati chili, you'll be ready to give plenty of Dutch ovens (and perhaps several Cleveland steamers, too.)

by Anonymousreply 5203/06/2015
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