I was once yelled at by Bette Midler, it was cool.
Back in late 70s or early 80s, it was the United Nations "YEAR OF THE CHILD", or some similar nonsense, and Bette was emceeing a mid-afternoon show or fund raiser in one of the NYC theatres. It was summer, mid afternoon, we scored some free tickets from a friend who was a gay activist in NYC at the time.
It was a bunch of little stale acts that performed for free. There was that little girl singing TOMORROW (ugh!), two magicians IN A ROW (!!), you get the picture. The place was half empty. My two friends and I were in the balcony and we had the balcony ALL TO OURSELVES!
So, we are in our early 20s, 3 queens in the balcony alone and we light up a blunt and get stoned because the acts are all so woefully bad. AND THEN WE GET THE UNCONTROLLABLE GIGGLES when two old vaudeville hoofers who flew in from England especially for this thing just to be seen, did a "risque" (haha) rap about the 12 signs of the Zodiac. (I'm not making this up.)
So the freakin' thing had 12 long verses to be sung by one big tall black man and a little shorty white dude.
So, long story short: By the time they get to the August verse even THEY know they are bombing. The tall black man sweats profusely and loses composure, the people downstairs are moving in their seats restless, and we are in the balcony absolutely rolling in laughter---shouting it out---and of course we don't know that we were making such a disturbance or that people were turning around to see who is making the racket in the balcony because we were so stoned we are totally unaware that we are causing a huge disturbance in a very large half-empty theatre. Until....
Before you can say "roll another", suddenly two hands plunk down on my shoulders from behind and we turn around and there is Bette Midler with semi-faux anger and she's kinda yelling at us. She came all the up to the balcony to yell at us. We think she's yelling at us because her mouth is moving real fast but we can't understand her. Why? BECAUSE WE ARE SO STONED! And the balcony reeks of reefer, too.
And then she said, "Look, I know they are awful, but you are laughing too loud so stop. And don't laugh at me because I'm finishing up this mess in 15 minutes with some songs of my own."
She ended up singing that lovely song about being an old sailor, do you recall it? And when she finished, she blew the balcony a big kiss just for us and that grat big Midler smile.
I still love her to death.
Should I get my own blog? Sorry!