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Bidets...Why are Americans so resistant?

Now that bidets can be installed on an average toilet for about $40, why don't more people use them? We have them and love the greatly improved hygiene.

by perfect assholereply 10510/18/2014

How does a bidet work?

Won't you have water dripping down your legs after you stand up?

Do you sit on the fucker, the ones that aren't a 2 for 1?

by perfect assholereply 107/19/2011

Why does R2 pontificate on things he's clueless about?

by perfect assholereply 307/19/2011

That crap $40 attachment to the toilet is a garbage product and a sh*it hook.

by perfect assholereply 407/19/2011

Aski Cheryl.

by perfect assholereply 507/19/2011

Isn't that why God invented toilet tissue?

by perfect assholereply 607/19/2011

There was an article about fifteen years ago in TV Guide that said Star Jones has a gold-plated bidet installed in her New York place.

I bet that bidet got a lot of use!

by perfect assholereply 707/19/2011

I want one of them-there toilets they had in Tokyo that gave a nice and refreshing surprise to my ass after each dump.

by perfect assholereply 807/19/2011

[quote] Bidets...Why are Americans so resistant?%0D %0D Maybe because we don't want to be a "perfect asshole" like the op.

by perfect assholereply 907/19/2011

They're great for washing out socks and things like that. For washing your privates? No.

by perfect assholereply 1007/19/2011

@r3 -- Pontificate, huh? Nope, just expressing an opinion. I wasn't wearing my mitre at the time.

by perfect assholereply 1107/19/2011

I just use Wet Wipes.

by perfect assholereply 1207/19/2011

Nobody bought mines.

by perfect assholereply 1307/19/2011

I feel sorry for the toilet and the bidet in Star Jones' bathroom.

by perfect assholereply 1407/19/2011

I keep reading this as Biden..Why are Americans so resistant?

by perfect assholereply 1507/19/2011

[quote]I want one of them-there toilets they had in Tokyo that gave a nice and refreshing surprise to my ass after each dump.

Everybody that comes to visit Japan loves the toilets.

I could never live without a Washlet. I had one installed in my New York apartment, too.

by perfect assholereply 1607/19/2011

I don't understand the logistics of a bidet.

Sorry for being course but does a stream of water just spray up your ass crack? Sort of like a mini shower for your ass?

Are you then supposed to use regular toilet paper to dry off or use a cotton towel? Because if you use toilet paper you'd have to use a lot of it to completely dry yourself. It all just seems like more of a process than it should be.

by perfect assholereply 1707/19/2011

Timing and regularity are everything.%0D %0D Dump before the morning shower, asswipe.

by perfect assholereply 1807/19/2011

Water supply is fresh and separate, duh. No wet legs. It has a rather precise stream. You just dry with a very small amount of TP. A small retractable sprayer comes out when you turn on the control. It is a variable control. If you got shit on your hands, would you wipe it off with TP(rub, rub, rub) or would you wash your hands. It is much more sanitary.

by perfect assholereply 1907/19/2011

Here's an instructional video. There's a spout for washing the ass and also a little geyser in the front of the basin for rinsing the vadge.

by perfect assholereply 2107/19/2011

R19 is exactly right.

If you had shit on any other part of your skin, would you think it's sufficient to just rub it with some dry paper because you take a shower every day?

by perfect assholereply 2207/19/2011

warshin' yer vagine (snfw)

by perfect assholereply 2307/19/2011

Anyone can have one, it's easy to install and FUN! to use.

by perfect assholereply 2407/19/2011

A lot of Americans don't even have handheld showers, but use an overhead shower which doesn't get their undercarriages all that clean. And they rarely soak in baths. %0D %0D

by perfect assholereply 2507/19/2011

R20 is correct. The real purpose of the bidet was to wash the nether regions between weekly baths. If you shower every day, it is superfluous.

by perfect assholereply 2607/19/2011

[quote] A lot of Americans don't even have handheld showers, but use an overhead shower which doesn't get their undercarriages all that clean.

Um, we use washcloths and body scrubbers for our "undercarriages."

by perfect assholereply 2707/19/2011

How they work.

by perfect assholereply 2807/19/2011

Who can afford one? I mean most of our homes don't have them.

by perfect assholereply 2907/19/2011

uh, Bidets don't replace toilet paper, r30.

by perfect assholereply 3107/19/2011

I've showered with a number of Americans, [R27], and they usually just swish a little soap around down there and barely rinse.

by perfect assholereply 3207/19/2011

Wait, what? The bidet I used- some fancy restaurant in Beverly Hills- had many varied water settings for cleaning and then you stay seated on it and it dries you. I loved it! Damn

by perfect assholereply 3307/19/2011

A BIDET IS NOT A TOILET. Good lord. You all are totally confused. A bidet is purely for cleaning, either yourself or, as somebody said, clothes.

The kind of thing that R33 is talking about is a toilet - a Japanese-style toilet that sprays you and dries you and whatever, but it's still a toilet.

(I think a lot of nouveau riche types like the word bidet because it's French and sounds hoity-toity, but they don't know what it is.)

by perfect assholereply 3407/19/2011

[quote] A BIDET IS NOT A TOILET. Good lord. You all are totally confused. A bidet is purely for cleaning, either yourself or, as somebody said, clothes.%0D %0D My mama always says, "don't shit where you eat!"

by perfect assholereply 3507/19/2011

I'm guessing they were all men, eh, R32?

Women tend to be a bit cleaner.

But then, the boys at DL tell me they like a man's "musky" smell...

by perfect assholereply 3607/19/2011

They seem okay. I've noticed that the countries who use them aren't as big on everyday hygiene (I've been chastised for Americans bathing too much). So, I'll take bathing everyday, having good physical and oral hygiene and maybe or maybe not using the bidet.

by perfect assholereply 3707/19/2011

I want one that when activated plays "I'm gonna wash that man right outta my hair"

by perfect assholereply 3807/19/2011

When they develop a smart sphincter cam that allows the machine to scrub, rinse and dry my asshole properly - regardless of how I sit on the can - I'll buy one.

by perfect assholereply 3907/19/2011

r21 must be someone's executive assistant, with such brevity and the link. Good work, r21.

by perfect assholereply 4007/19/2011

fleet Enema!

by perfect assholereply 4107/19/2011

I think they're stupid. I just use flushable wet wipes, which get you much cleaner and are a lot quicker and simpler to use.

by perfect assholereply 4207/19/2011

R42. There is a wonderful feeling of fresh and clean while sitting on the bidet as the water sprays up into your nether regions. Excuse me, but you just don't get that same feeling with a declasse, flushable wet wipe.

by perfect assholereply 4307/19/2011

it DOES feel great, I'll admit that.

by perfect assholereply 4407/19/2011

I used one in Japan and it was one of those hi-tech ones with lots of buttons to push, all in Japanese. Well, it was like a NSFW episode of I Love Lucy. I couldn't turn the freakin thing off and the more buttons I pressed the more weird things kept going on "down there."

by perfect assholereply 4507/19/2011

I just got back from France and there wasn't a bidet in either hotel I was in - one in the Charles de Gaulle Hotel (Sheraton) and one in Beauvais (City Hotel or something like that.) Are they going out of style there or only in hotels that cater to foreigners?

by perfect assholereply 4607/21/2011

Those of you using the argument that you wouldn't just use paper to get shit off any other part of your body are missing a point...I also wouldn't just use water, I'd use soap. Unless that thing soaps it up down there, it's not really doing a whole lot for cleanliness that paper can't accomplish on its own.

by perfect assholereply 4707/21/2011

I think it's a great idea but I usually take baths to avoid the nasty condition the rest of your holes are in.

by perfect assholereply 4807/21/2011

R47 = scat queen

by perfect assholereply 4907/21/2011

R49, you lack the wit to reply here. I mean, really, that's all you can come up with? Both of your posts are pretty stupid.

by perfect assholereply 5007/21/2011

We had a AA guest at the resort where I use to work at in the Poconos, who actually scaled her pussy. This happened during checkout and the lobby was a madhouse. She was cursing like a stevedore and walking around like Yosemite Sam. It was hilarious.

by perfect assholereply 5107/21/2011

R43 Most people don't have time for all that shit (no pun intended). Besides, with wet wipes, you can actually make sure you're cleaning sufficiently and getting it inside of yourself enough rather than just getting some stupid water splashed on you.

by perfect assholereply 5207/21/2011

R51, wtf?

You had a member of Alcoholics Anonymous scale her pussy? Wtf is scaling?

by perfect assholereply 5307/21/2011

I don't have a bidet attachment on my toilet; I just hang my ass over the edge of the bathtub and use the handheld shower-massager thing to rinse off.

It's freaking awesome. It feels damn good, and does a fantastic job of cleaning up.

It's especially useful for mornings when you unexpectedly got your period overnight and there's blood all over your pubes and taint.

by perfect assholereply 5407/21/2011

"scalded" The water was too hot.

by perfect assholereply 5507/21/2011

What can it do for me that my wet wipes can't do better and cheaper?

by perfect assholereply 5607/21/2011

>>>We had a AA guest at the resort where I use to work at in the Poconos, who actually scalded her pussy%0D %0D %0D %0D What? They have bidets in Pennsylvania? what is happening to this country. It's going straight to hell. You commie, America hating socialists are destroying everything that is sacred.

by perfect assholereply 5707/21/2011

Are there any running streams or creeks on THE LAND at the MICHFEST location?

by perfect assholereply 5807/21/2011

Bidets are like super important.

by perfect assholereply 5907/21/2011

They feel good. I want to use one right now.

by perfect assholereply 6007/21/2011

Have your morning BM, then take shower, use hand-held to irrigate anal area thoroughly, get clean as a whistle, don't need to buy and install any extra plumbing equipment.

Problem solved.

No more carpet scooting for you!

by perfect assholereply 6107/21/2011

I feel bad for dogs when they have to do that little hindquarter drag across the carpet to get that itch.

by perfect assholereply 6207/21/2011

I love the feeling of a squirt of water up my asshole; it's heaven. It also means I never have skid marks and my gf loves to rim me (germ free) ;o)


by perfect assholereply 6307/21/2011

Wouldn't you know the one time I stayed in a hotel with a bidet I had a lower back injury that precluded my using it. I was so looking forward to dredging out my eerie canal.

by perfect assholereply 6507/21/2011

I LOVE them. You can take a shit, take a shower and then need to take another shit. With a bidet you don't need to take another shower! No fuss. No mus/ty. Clean and fresh.

I use the wipes when I have to but the bidet is KING!

by perfect assholereply 6607/21/2011

And you can get the toilet paper to stick to your wet butt!

by perfect assholereply 6707/21/2011

R54, women have taints? I feel like an idiot--thought that was just guys.

I put soap and water from the sink on a little paper if it's necessary and always do a thorough shower wash (feels good).

by perfect assholereply 6807/21/2011

The only reason anyone would want their bumholes to be clean is so they can have gay sex down there.

by perfect assholereply 6907/21/2011

The electric toilets in Japan are amazing. They accurately spray warm water in your asscrack until it's clean, some have hot air dryers; otherwise, you just use a small amount of TP to dry.

In Thailand hotels I used hand-held hoses right over the toilet, which is way more practical than the separate Euro-style bidets I've used.

The most awkward toilet I've used was an outhouse near a beach that consisted of two buckets: one to shit into, another filled with water and a coffee mug that is used for rinsing. No toilet paper, but a sink with soap and running water was provided outside.

by perfect assholereply 7007/22/2011

R70...was that beach Fire Island?

by perfect assholereply 7107/22/2011

Why is Japan the top of the world in toilets while China is still shitting in holes in the floor?

by perfect assholereply 7207/22/2011

Why is the United States a democracy while Venezuela a crazy dictatorship?

Why do they speak Spanish in Spain while the French speak French?

by perfect assholereply 7307/22/2011

We've had a bidet/washlet toilet seat replacement for years now and love it. Our paper use is 1/10 of what it used to be, much more hygienic than dragging wood pulp across your hole, great for before- and after-sex cleanup, heated seat, air purifier... Best household appliance ever.

by perfect assholereply 7407/23/2011

You people are sooo ignorant it's not even funny, especially the person saying that unlike the europeans, we have plenty of water here in the US and can take showers.

People here in NC that I know laughed at me when I told them I was buying a bidet, They laughed like I WAS the moron and not them.

So, my ass WILL be much cleaner than yours and you are laughing at ME. That's beyond ignorant.

Some even thought that you went straight from taking a shit to the bidet. Ie, no paper in between.

The real bidet and not the add on crap they sell is a simple thing. It shoots water up your ass or other private parts which you rinse with soap or soap and water and you're done. Kinda like getting from the crapper into the shower to get really clean but you don't do your whole body.

Yes, you use a towel afterwards unless you do what I do and it's hot outside. I shower or do the bidet thing and just walk away with the water dripping and then air dry but that's me.

You take a crap, wipe and flush. Take a step over to your bidet and finish the job by getting REALLY clean because paper itself will NEVER clean you as well as paper and then water or water and soap.

I hope this clears things up and answers the ignorant bastards that responed but were completely well, IGNORANT!

As for Europeans being dirtier. Don't you believe it for a second.

by perfect assholereply 7508/18/2013

A bidet make a cute little fountain. I use the color wheel from an old aluminum Christmas tree set-up to make it look even prettier. An added bonus, if the bidet is situated JUST right, you can take a dump and wash your feet at the same time. Try it, you'll like it.

by perfect assholereply 7608/18/2013

I bought a brondell bidet toilet seat a year ago, and it's much better than a traditional bidet, in my opinion. You don't have to "switch seats," plus it has a variety of angles, water pressure and water temperature choices. My only problem with it is that even the "front" angle is a bit too far back for a woman. It also has a dryer, but I've found that to be pretty ineffective so I just use TP to dry off.

by perfect assholereply 7808/18/2013

Doesn't poop water end up all over the spray nozzle? And then when the next person uses the bidet, it sprays your poop molecules on them? (or vice versa?) There's no way that nozzle stays sterile.

by perfect assholereply 7908/18/2013

I olden days a stegosaurus wiped our asses clean after each shit

by perfect assholereply 8008/18/2013

Ava Gardner used a bidet. She was a sophisticated lady. And she had a lot of cum to rinse out of her pussy.

by perfect assholereply 8108/18/2013

I think they are considered too French in post 9/11 America.

I think we should take a tip from frites and market them as "freedom douches"

by perfect assholereply 8208/18/2013

Ours has a self cleaning feature.

by perfect assholereply 8308/18/2013

Most American bathrooms don't have bidets because there's no room for a separate stand-alone bidet.

by perfect assholereply 8408/18/2013

The hand held sprays are much easier to use and in SE Asia, it's usually connected to a water faucet next to the toilet bowl; no fear of feces contamination or what not and it's much easier to use than the European style bidets.

by perfect assholereply 8508/18/2013

[quote] If you had shit on any other part of your skin, would you think it's sufficient to just rub it with some dry paper because you take a shower every day?

I am a fan of bidets, but this argument is just silly.

If you get shit on your hands, of course you're going to immediately use soap and water to wash it off. After all, your hands are extremely visible and active. You use them to write, eat, shake hands, open doors, scratch yourself.....the list goes on. Clean hands are essential.

Your butt hole, on the other hand, is entirely different. You just wipe it with toilet paper, which gets rid of 99% of the residue. (Insert an Occupy Wall Street joke here about how the 1% are pieces of shit.)

Then as you stand up, your butt cheeks slam together, essentially hiding your hole. If you have a bubble butt, you might be lucky enough to feel your two fleshy mounds jiggle as they violently collide with each other.

Then you pull up your fancy turquoise contour briefs, covering up your hole even further. This will also work with a basic pair of white Hanes, but you're obviously not getting laid if you wear Hanes, so why care about a clean hole?

Then you pull up your pants, providing yet one more layer of cover for Mr. Bunghole. Can you see what's happening here? This is why reversing all of these procedures during foreplay is so exciting, like unwrapping a present. All that work has a reward in the end. Rear end, to be precise.

Then you go about your day, NOT using your butt hole to write, eat, shake hands, open doors, scratch yourself, etc.

I realize that previous sentence likely has some exceptions, but I don't want to hear from you scary people.

by perfect assholereply 8608/18/2013

This reminds me!

by perfect assholereply 8708/18/2013

Because in America... WE TAKE SHOWERS!

The French have to use bidets (and perfume) because they stink to high heaven.

by perfect assholereply 8808/18/2013

Toilets themselves aren't even good for us. We're actually meant to squat, not sit - it's healthier for the colon.

That's why people die on the toilet all of the time.

by perfect assholereply 8908/18/2013

What R20 said, with extra soap and water. I've yet to meet a European who didn't offend my nose one way or another.

by perfect assholereply 9008/18/2013

R78 I have one of those, too. I guess I must be pretty messy "down there" because even when I run it for six or seven cycles, I'm not completely clean. But it's still better than what I had to go through before I had it.

by perfect assholereply 9108/18/2013

I hate to ask but I need input.

Can someone start a thread for an "Old House Question?"


by perfect assholereply 9208/18/2013

Disgusting. The spray shoots up, the shit water falls back into the bidet, and microscopic fecal particles sit in the bottom of the bidet until they are sprayed into the next person's ass. If bidets were sterilized between uses, fine. But they aren't. I have lived in both Madrid and Paris where I had bidets, but I never used them. It's like washing your ass with toilet water. No thanks. At least toilet paper doesn't have specks of another person's day old shit on it.

by perfect assholereply 9308/18/2013

The bidet is also used as a mini bath for your junk. For instance if you've got a hottie waiting between the sheets, you fill the bidet with water and a bit of liquid soap. Sit on the bidet, dunk you junk and clean everything up nicely using a wash cloth. End result: very clean and the fresh scent of morning dew.

A shower won't accomplish the same.

by perfect assholereply 9408/18/2013

A regular helpful Heloise @R94.

by perfect assholereply 9508/18/2013

R89 Let's get our facts straight dear. Ava Gardner religiously douched with white vinegar to deal with cum. It's in all her bios accompanied by photos of her dancing with gypsies in Spain (her douche bag slung over her left shoulder)

Her bidet was for her ass.

Dear dear Ava. She was ... "like a real girlfriend."

by perfect assholereply 9608/18/2013

I live in Italy. Italians are obsessed with cleanliness. I take a shower every morning and often after work. Yes, the morning shower is fine after a morning shit...but sometimes you must go during the day.

Wiping shit around with paper and leaving it at that is disgusting. It is unclean.

by perfect assholereply 9708/18/2013

Dear R95 Thank you darling. Try it, you'll like it.

I'm always here for you.

by perfect assholereply 9808/18/2013

Would some pro-bidet people please answer or address comments [R93] &[R79]? They're valid points.

by perfect assholereply 9908/18/2013

R62 , it's called "Taylor Swifting"!

by perfect assholereply 10008/18/2013

I dont know if we are resistant, its more like we dont need them. Typically, Americans bathe at least once a day. Taking a shit is often followed by a shower. I know it is for me.

by perfect assholereply 10108/18/2013

"I feel bad for dogs when they have to do that little hindquarter drag across the carpet to get that itch"

More likely to be impacted anal glands...

by perfect assholereply 10208/18/2013


by perfect assholereply 10308/18/2013

Where do these queens get the idea that a bidet sprays water from the toilet bowl, r99?

It's a fresh water spritz for your butthole, and also for your ladyparts if you have them.

The nicer models let you control the water temperature, the intensity of the spray, "Front" or "Back" spray, and even offer "Oscillating" and "Pulsating" settings.

There is also a blower for "Drying" mode, and you can, of course, adjust the temperature of the air.

Your booty stays kissing fresh, and you use a LOT less paper.

by perfect assholereply 10408/18/2013

OMG! I can't believe what I am reading. I am an American who never had a bidet. NEVER EVER in my life have I ever had "skid marks" in my undies, or got poo on my hands while wiping. That's soooo gross!! What in the hell are people eating that they can't get a clean wipe after a few deep swipes?! Unless you have a virus or some sort of medical condition, you should have a clean bowel movement with NO residue. Hell, I don't even eat that great and I still have no residue, so I can't imagine how bad someone has to eat to have residue all of the time. As for periods, most women are on the birth control pill, which makes your period practically nill. There are always moist wipes if you need to use them, which I do even if I don't need them..two of them usually. Why not be as clean as you can. And besides, unless there is soap involved, plain water does nothing!! Never mind the fact the just spraying an area, even if soap is involved, doesn't clean. You actually have to scrub or rub (with soap too) to clean. I'm always super clean down there and I do not have a bidet.

But let us not forget the main reason why most Americans don't have a bidet. BECAUSE THEY SHOWER EVERYDAY; SOMETIMES TWICE!!!! You need to clean your ENTIRE BODY every day with soap and water.

by perfect assholereply 10510/18/2014
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