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Your favorite Simpsons Quotes

When faced with a food or situation I'm not thrilled about I say "I suppose you could crush some pills into it."

When something great happens..."Everything's coming up Milhouse!"

When my boyfriend says he hates something that I know he likes "You put Shake and Bake in your coffee!"

Not many people understand what the fuck I'm talking about but those that do are instant friends.

Now tell me how pathetic the Simpsons and/or quoting pop culture references are, R1.

by Anonymousreply 27503/11/2015

"GARBAGE ANGELS!"

by Anonymousreply 104/01/2011

I'm Idaho!

by Anonymousreply 204/01/2011

I didn't think it was physically possible, but this both sucks and blows.

by Anonymousreply 304/01/2011

At something mildly annoying: TINA! BRING ME THE AXE!%0D %0D Favorite non sequitur: This ain't my first rodeo.

by Anonymousreply 404/01/2011

"Man versus Nature: The Road to Victory"

by Anonymousreply 504/01/2011

Sipowicz does it.... wearing a tie with a short sleeve shirt.

by Anonymousreply 604/01/2011

Ms. Hoover after the portrait of Mr. Burns is revealed: He's evil, but he'll die.

I say it about my boss all the time.

Me and my co-workers can now just say "H.E.B.H.D" and we all know what it means.

by Anonymousreply 704/01/2011

Whenever I continue a conversation that had been interrupted: So I says to Mabel, I says...

by Anonymousreply 804/01/2011

I will probably still be using the phrase "possible homer sexual" in describing new acquaintances via text message when I'm 80 years old

by Anonymousreply 904/01/2011

It's a perfectly cromulent word!%0D %0D My cat's breath smells like cat food.%0D %0D Mmm...floor pie.

by Anonymousreply 1004/01/2011

Pay no attention to that clod, Patty. you could turn the world on with your smile.%0D %0D I'm sweaty... let's drive through the carwash.%0D %0D There goes the last remaining threads of my heterosexuality.%0D %0D Don't tell me, let me guess... it just got fatter in here.%0D %0D Think unsexy thoughts... think unsexy thoughts!!%0D %0D

by Anonymousreply 1104/01/2011

Katie Couric didn't just "become" the world's most famous dwarf--she escaped from the circus and she went for it!

by Anonymousreply 1204/01/2011

Watch what happens when I absorb this blue liquid!

by Anonymousreply 1304/01/2011

You can start with the corns. Then you can move on to bunion country.

by Anonymousreply 1504/01/2011

Some days we don't let the line move at all. We call those weekdays.

by Anonymousreply 1604/01/2011

Homercles cares not for beans!%0D %0D I wash myself with a rag on a stick.%0D %0D

by Anonymousreply 1704/01/2011

Marge, I'm an American: I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals FLAMING.

by Anonymousreply 1804/01/2011

We have Mr. Pibb, Clamato, and soy milk.

by Anonymousreply 1904/01/2011

If you want to be pawed by something fat and lazy we could just get a cat.

by Anonymousreply 2004/01/2011

I like my beer cold... my TV loud... and my homosexuals flaming!%0D %0D

by Anonymousreply 2104/01/2011

Is this tuna or chicken?

by Anonymousreply 2204/01/2011

And I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords ...

by Anonymousreply 2304/01/2011

Whatever it does, it's doing it now (referring to the giant immobile Olmec head given to the family by Mr Burns)

by Anonymousreply 2404/01/2011

You don't win friends with sal-ad! You don't win friends with sal-ad!

by Anonymousreply 2504/01/2011

Friends? Ha! These are my only friends: grown-up nerds like Gore Vidal - and even he's kissed more boys than I ever will

by Anonymousreply 2604/01/2011

Instead of chewing gum, chew bacon. Instead of using bread, use Pop Tarts. You could brush your teeth with milkshakes!

by Anonymousreply 2704/01/2011

Works on contingency? No, money down!

by Anonymousreply 2804/01/2011

I'm on it like Oprah on a baked ham!

by Anonymousreply 2904/01/2011

Welcome to loserville. Population - YOU!

by Anonymousreply 3004/01/2011

The internet? Is that thing still around?

by Anonymousreply 3104/01/2011

"Internet, ehhhh???"

by Anonymousreply 3204/01/2011

A-hoy-hoy!

by Anonymousreply 3304/01/2011

Here's to alcohol, source of and answer to all life's problems.

by Anonymousreply 3404/01/2011

From a rather recent episode:

Krusty: Homer, you're the easiest laugher I know

Homer: How easy am I?

Krusty: Shut up!

(It's the "shut up" deliver that makes me laugh).

Also from the same episode:

I give art like you give milk

by Anonymousreply 3504/01/2011

We'll all live like kings. Damn hell ass kings.%0D %0D It tastes like...burning.

by Anonymousreply 3704/01/2011

Call me mint jelly, 'cause I'm on the lam!

Get Mama's pryin' board.

When Bart was your age, he was smart as a monkey. Now he's dumb as a chimp.

by Anonymousreply 3804/01/2011

Rev. Lovejoy: No Homer, God didn't burn your house down, but he was working in the hearts of your friends, be they Christian, Jew, or... "miscellaneous".

Apu: Hindu! There are seven hundred million of us, you know.

by Anonymousreply 3904/01/2011

"Nourish my inner child!!!" [Threateningly]: "Nourishhhhh...."

"Careful! That sponge has corners!"

by Anonymousreply 4004/01/2011

Another vote for "My cat's breath smells like cat food."

by Anonymousreply 4104/01/2011

"I find your ideas intriguing and would like to subscribe to your newsletter"

by Anonymousreply 4204/01/2011

Girls, R26. Boys kiss girls.%0D

by Anonymousreply 4304/01/2011

Animatronic Pizza Parlor Characters:

You're the birthday, you're the birthday, you're the birthday boy or girl!

by Anonymousreply 4404/01/2011

"The children are right to laugh at you, Ralph. Those scissors wouldn't cut butter."

"Not [italic]Aztec[/italic], Maggie. [italic]Olmec.[/italic]"

"Math is hard!"

"I, for one, welcome our new [blank] overlords."

by Anonymousreply 4504/01/2011

Hi, Lisa! We're going to be in a pie!

by Anonymousreply 4604/01/2011

"Let's bake cookies for the boys!"

"Ohhhh-kay..." As used by Ned when he pushes the mattress out the upstairs window to toss Homer onto during the housefire, and Homer bounces off it back into the burning house. I always say it when I think something is going to be fairly uncomplicated, and then realize it's going to be a lot more involved and time-consuming than I planned.

by Anonymousreply 4704/01/2011

After all the school children have crash-landed on a deserted island, the two creepy, twin girls are starving, "We're so hungry we could eat at Arby's".

by Anonymousreply 4804/01/2011

And I wish you didn't have the Devil's curly hair.

by Anonymousreply 4904/01/2011

"First you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women."

"You still owe me ten Iroqious twists!"

"Surly only looks out for one guy...Surly."

"I'm queen of the world! ...of spelling."

And, of course:

by Anonymousreply 5004/01/2011

This sounds suspiciously like rock and/or roll.

by Anonymousreply 5104/01/2011

[quote]Welcome to loserville. Population - YOU!

Not quite. The actual quote is:

"Dear Edna, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: YOU. p.s. I am gay."

by Anonymousreply 5204/01/2011

R43 beat me to it. :-)

"The goggles! They do nothing!".

"In theory, communism works. In theory."

by Anonymousreply 5304/01/2011

Me fail English? That's unpossible!

by Anonymousreply 5404/01/2011

"THREE pairs of shoes? SOMEONE had a fetish."

by Anonymousreply 5504/01/2011

Ow! My eye! I'm not supposed to get pudding in it!

by Anonymousreply 5604/01/2011

Your not exactly open casket material yourself...

by Anonymousreply 5704/01/2011

Mr Burns, there's an eight year old boy on your lawn.%0D %0D Release the hounds...

by Anonymousreply 5804/01/2011

Here we go boy meets beast!

by Anonymousreply 5904/01/2011

Oh, y'all - I never said any of those silly things!

by Anonymousreply 6004/01/2011

"There's doings a-transpiring!"

"But I love solids!"

by Anonymousreply 6104/01/2011

Homer discovers somebody's stolen their xmas tree and presents. "Lisa, where's Christmas?"

"I sorry. My English is how you say? Inelegant."

Selma and Patty flip through magazines for new hairstyles. Selma or Patty: "No. No. No. Butch."

by Anonymousreply 6204/01/2011

But I just swept the circle of death!

by Anonymousreply 6304/01/2011

"Mistah Spahkahru! Foh your happy washuuuuuuuuuuuuu!"

by Anonymousreply 6404/01/2011

Where my brother died, I will live, in his apartment!

by Anonymousreply 6504/01/2011

... and that sends me into a shame spiral.

by Anonymousreply 6604/01/2011

Homer: Marge, I'd like to be alone with the sandwich for a moment.%0D %0D Marge: Are you going to eat it?%0D %0D Homer: [pause] Yes.%0D

by Anonymousreply 6704/01/2011

Homer: [to Skinner] Whaddaya mean, you lost him? He might have fallen into one of these machines! [turns]%0D Oh, my God: that's his lucky red hat. He's a box! My boy's a box! Damn you, a box!%0D

by Anonymousreply 6804/01/2011

I shall banish you to the land of wind and ghosts.

by Anonymousreply 6904/01/2011

Marge's mother on make-up tips:

Ladies pinch--WHORES use rouge!

by Anonymousreply 7004/01/2011

There you have it, real, unrehearsed testimonials from important celebrities. She's great, isn't she? I loved her in the thing I saw her in.

by Anonymousreply 7104/01/2011

Stickin' together is what good waffles do.

by Anonymousreply 7204/01/2011

oh and...

Public transportation is for jerks and lesbians.

by Anonymousreply 7304/01/2011

Paddlin' the school canoe? You better believe that's a paddlin'.

by Anonymousreply 7404/01/2011

I don't know what you have in mind for tonight Homer, but you can count me out!

by Anonymousreply 7504/01/2011

Nibbles! Chew thro my ball sack.

by Anonymousreply 7604/01/2011

"Just once I'd like someone call me 'Sir' without following it with 'you're making a scene'."

by Anonymousreply 7704/01/2011

And I think it's ironic that for once Dad's butt PREVENTED the release of toxic gas...

by Anonymousreply 7804/01/2011

HOMER: "I'll tell you the secret to Bingo. "(whispers) YOU HAVE TO CHEAT".

by Anonymousreply 7904/01/2011

Re: Kentucky Fried Panda --

HOMER: Awww, it was finger Ling Ling good.

by Anonymousreply 8004/01/2011

WON'T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE CHILDREN?!

by Anonymousreply 8104/01/2011

"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand."

"It's funny because it's truuuuuue."

"There's a [italic]New[/italic] Mexico?!?."

"Well, crying isn't gonna bring him back ... unless your tears smell like dog food. So you can either sit there crying and eating can after can of dog food until your tears smell enough like dog food to make your dog come back or you can go out there and find your dog."

by Anonymousreply 8204/01/2011

As Homer hits a statue with his car

D'oh!

A Deer!

A female deer!

by Anonymousreply 8304/01/2011

TraMAPoline!

by Anonymousreply 8404/01/2011

Krusty the Clown: "A coconut bagel? Like poison it tastes!"

by Anonymousreply 8504/01/2011

Hey, look at me. I'm Blanche DuBois!

by Anonymousreply 8604/01/2011

I'm not convinced, I've had bad luck with aphrodisiacs.%0D %0D I begged you to look at mine first.. I begged you.%0D %0D Save me from the wee turtles.%0D %0D Once episode featured a fun run with a banner that said "Ruin your knees for charity."

by Anonymousreply 8704/01/2011

Well, excuse me for having enormous flaws that I refuse to work on!%0D %0D Marge, I never would've lied to you if I knew you were going to find out.%0D %0D Public transportation is for losers and lesbians.

by Anonymousreply 8804/01/2011

"Twenty Seven!"

by Anonymousreply 8904/01/2011

No, gotta read Marges' book. Can't get distracted. Distracted, that's a funny word. Does anyone ever get 'tracted'? I'm gonna call the suicide hotline and ask them.

by Anonymousreply 9004/01/2011

[quote]There goes the last remaining threads of my heterosexuality.

It's "the last lingering threat of my heterosexuality", actually, and I use it all the time. Also:

Everything's comin' up Milhouse!

He was a zombie?

Join us or die! Can you do any less?

There's your answer, fishbulb.

by Anonymousreply 9104/01/2011

Hey, look at me, I'm Hitler!

by Anonymousreply 9204/02/2011

Wait a minute. Four hundred a month for loafer lightener? You get the same results with a mincing gel.

by Anonymousreply 9304/02/2011

The air conditioner isn't working...

LISA: Bart, you can't just lay around in your underwear.

BART: Hey, this ain't the Ritz.

by Anonymousreply 9404/02/2011

[quote]"Well, crying isn't gonna bring him back ... unless your tears smell like dog food. So you can either sit there crying and eating can after can of dog food until your tears smell enough like dog food to make your dog come back or you can go out there and find your dog."

R82, you left out the rest of the scene!

After Bart decides to go find his dog, Homer turns to Marge and says, disappointed, "I almost got him to eat dog food!"

by Anonymousreply 9504/02/2011

Go BANANA!

by Anonymousreply 9604/02/2011

Look Marge, you don't know what it's like. I'm the one out there every day putting his ass on the line. And I'm not out of order! You're out of order! The whole freaking system is out of order! You want the truth? You want the truth?! You can't handle the truth! 'Cause when you reach over and put your hand into a pile of goo that was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do! Forget it, Marge, it's Chinatown!!

by Anonymousreply 9704/02/2011

Stranger to Homer at Moe's, out of the blue: "Friend, how would you like to be higher than you've ever been high before in your life?"%0D %0D Homer: "Be an astronaut??? SURE!!!"%0D

by Anonymousreply 9804/02/2011

When I was seventeen it was a very good beer%0D %0D I hate every ape I see from chimpan-a to chimpanzee

by Anonymousreply 9904/02/2011

Marge to Lisa:

"It doesn't matter how you feel inside, you know. It's what shows up on the surface that counts. Take all your bad feelings and push them down, all the way down, past your knees, until you're almost walking on them. And then you'll fit in, and you'll be invited to parties, and boys will like you . . . and happiness will follow."

by Anonymousreply 10004/02/2011

Moe reading Maggie a bedtime story:

"Finally, they kiss his hands and Scarface becomes the Godfather. Then he closes the door... (crying).. on Annie Hall".

by Anonymousreply 10104/02/2011

Most are Ralph Wiggums lines although I am fond of saying "purple monkey dishwasher!" It's from the teachers strike episode when the crowd starts whispering something about Skinner and they pass it on to another person, like playing telephone. Eventually, someone yells "Skinner said the teachers will crack any minute purple monkey dishwasher!

Others: My cat's breath smells like cat food.

That's unpossible!

It says 'you choo-choose me.' And it's got a picture of a train.

It tastes like burning!

That's where I see the leprechaun. he tells me to burn things.

by Anonymousreply 10204/02/2011

Oh, and how could I forget "Catfishe?" from the shoplifting episode. When the guy is actually saying to Bart "Capiche?"

I use that one constantly.

I can't believe no one has said "aye carumba!"

Or "I didn't do it!"

by Anonymousreply 10304/02/2011

Why, back when I was your age, I had 43 movies under my belt, and I had to do it without tappa-tappa-tappa. I would've killed for tappa-tappa-tappa!

by Anonymousreply 10404/02/2011

.

by Anonymousreply 10504/02/2011

Fishnet Speedo Jr. %0D %0D "I wish I wish I didn't squish that fish." %0D %0D After rolling in the orange soft drink 'with extra wasabi!' Homer yells 'it burns!' That gets used all the time. %0D %0D Another vote for 'in theory Marge, Communism works. In THEORY.' %0D %0D Also: Lisa tells Homer that bacon, ham, and pork all come from the same animal. Homer: "Yes, Lisa, what maaaaagical animal?' %0D %0D

by Anonymousreply 10604/02/2011

PINCHYYYYYYY!!!!!!

om nom nom

by Anonymousreply 10704/02/2011

ahahahaha R107! We quote that one all the time. "Pinchy would have wanted it this way ..."

by Anonymousreply 10804/02/2011

I'll be ever so pissed.

by Anonymousreply 10904/02/2011

Marge, it takes two to lie, one to lie and one to listen.

by Anonymousreply 11004/02/2011

"Mmmmmm...unexplained bacon..."

When Bart complains that Homer doesn't come to his little league games: "I told you...I find them boring..."

by Anonymousreply 11104/02/2011

In the Halloween episode 'the Shinning': Mr Burns, when the Simpsons arrive at the hotel, get out of the car and say hello: "Oh, look - the sea monkeys I ordered have arrived." %0D %0D Later in the same Halloween episode, the elevator doors open and blood pours out. Mr Burns: "That's odd. Usually the blood gets off at the second floor." %0D %0D Strangely quotable in a lot of situations.

by Anonymousreply 11204/02/2011

What YOU don't know would fill a WAREHOUSE, man.

by Anonymousreply 11304/02/2011

Burns: Smithers, why are they booing at me?

Smithers: Uh, they're not booing. They're saying, 'Boo-urns! Boo-urns!'

Burns: Are you people booing, or are you saying 'Boo-urns'?

(Angry crowd boos loudly, throws things)

Hans Moleman: I was saying 'Boo-urns.'

by Anonymousreply 11404/02/2011

Hey look! A thing!

by Anonymousreply 11504/02/2011

Reverse vampires!%0D %0D TV: It's 11 o'clock. Do you know where your children are?%0D %0D Homer: I told you last night, no!

by Anonymousreply 11604/02/2011

Homer trying to intercept a letter at the post office that he he wrote to Mr. Burns:

Homer: Hi, I'm Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me.

Man: OK, Mr. Burns. What's your first name?

Homer: I don't know.

_________ Homer kidnaps the kids he was sitting for and drives off with them. Arnie in the Sky is covering the story.

Kent: Arnie, how are the kids?

Arnie: I can't see through metal, Kent!

by Anonymousreply 11704/02/2011

Mr. Burns at answering medical questions:

Dr: Reason for parents death?

Mr. Burns: They got in my way.

by Anonymousreply 11804/02/2011

"Two, four, six, eight

Homer's crime was really great!

Great meaning large or immense

We use it in the pejorative sense!

by Anonymousreply 11904/02/2011

You can't go to regular cuts, noooooo, you have to go to "Supercuts"

by Anonymousreply 12004/02/2011

Little Vicki: We all do crazy things when we're desperate. I once destroyed Buddy Ebsen's credit rating.%0D %0D Lisa: Why?%0D %0D Little Vicki: HE knows why.

by Anonymousreply 12104/02/2011

Que malo. Once again I must sugar my own churro.

by Anonymousreply 12204/02/2011

Or what? You'll release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouth and when they bark they shoot bees at you?

by Anonymousreply 12304/02/2011

Ralph: Hi Super Nintendo Chalmers!

by Anonymousreply 12404/02/2011

(I LOVE the Little Vicki lines!)

by Anonymousreply 12504/02/2011

Oooh, rock me Dr. Zaius!

by Anonymousreply 12604/02/2011

HA-ha!

by Anonymousreply 12704/02/2011

"Is there no place for the man with the 105 IQ?"

by Anonymousreply 12804/02/2011

Homer when he is told he has an anger issues: %0D %0D "Oh no, I'm a rageaholic! I'm addicted to rageahol!!"

by Anonymousreply 12904/02/2011

The family watch on TV some trashy real-life crime story. Homer: 'But Marge, he must be guilty - listen to the music.'

Flanders: 'Hand me the Crayola and color me tickled pink!'

Marge: 'When your uncle got out of the Navy he would curse a blue streak. It almost cost him his job as a baby photographer.'

The family visits an old people's home full of essential devices for the very infirm. Homer: 'Marge, when my time comes, please don't keep me away from a place like this.'

General: 'Homer, you remind me of the son I never had.' Homer: 'And you remind me of the father I never visit.'

by Anonymousreply 13004/02/2011

The names of stores are the best. My favorite was the gun store named: Blood, Bath and Beyond

by Anonymousreply 13104/02/2011

Yes, R132! I liked the upscale grocery store named "Eatie Gourmet's" and the girls' hairdresser, "Snippi Longstockings."

by Anonymousreply 13204/02/2011

Save me, Jeebus!

by Anonymousreply 13304/02/2011

I have a ball. Perhaps you'd like to bounce it.

by Anonymousreply 13404/02/2011

"Not a hymn to war like our national anthem, but a sweet soothing hymn like the national anthem of Canada"

Bart: "It%E2%80%99s all Christianity people! The little stupid differences are nothing next to the big stupid similarities!"

Ned: "That%E2%80%99s right! Can%E2%80%99t we all just get together and focus on our real enemies: monogamous gays and stem cells%E2%80%A6"

by Anonymousreply 13504/02/2011

LoL at Boo-Urns. I say that one every time I see bad theater.

by Anonymousreply 13604/02/2011

Orphan Girl: Three is not enough.

by Anonymousreply 13704/02/2011

Bart: Ice cream at church? I'm intrigued, yet suspicious!

Lisa: Wow. Look at all these flavours. Blessed Virgin Berry, Commandment, Bible Gum...

Rev. Lovejoy: Or, if you'd prefer, we also have Unitarian icecream.

Lisa: There's nothing here!

Rev. Lovejoy: Exactly.

by Anonymousreply 13804/02/2011

Chief Wiggum: You can have these fireworks I've confiscated. Some Chinese people claimed they were celebrating New Years in February.

by Anonymousreply 14004/02/2011

"I call the big one Bitey."

by Anonymousreply 14104/02/2011

Help! She touching my special area!

by Anonymousreply 14204/02/2011

What's going on? And I want the non-gay explanation!

by Anonymousreply 14304/02/2011

Mmmm....pie pants.%0D %0D Homer, you have a lot of tension in your back fat. %0D %0D The rod up his butt has a rod up it's butt!%0D %0D More testicles means more iron! %0D %0D %0D %0D %0D

by Anonymousreply 14404/02/2011

I'm not going to read through this thread, but I'm definitely going to contribute:

1. Homer: Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand

2. Bill Gates: You don't think I got rich by writing a bunch of checks, do you?

3. Homer: Mmmmm, sacrilicious.

4. Security System Salesman: Sir, surely you can't put a price on your family's safety.

Homer: I wouldn't have thought so either, yet here we are....

5. Sideshow Bob: Your guilty consciences may force you to vote Democratic, but secretly you yearn for a cold-hearted Republican who%E2%80%99ll cut taxes, brutalize criminals, and rule you like a king!

by Anonymousreply 14504/02/2011

Stupid sexy Flanders!

by Anonymousreply 14604/02/2011

R48 -- my favorite part of the Arby's quote is how afterward all the kids murmur in agreement.

by Anonymousreply 14704/02/2011

Bart "We are poor yellow trash". I am biracial and use this line all the time. My dad actually went to high school with Matt Groening (Lincoln High in Portland). He absolutely adored him, as everyone else that has met him does, from what I gather. He is very gay friendly, and has contributed a lot of money to liberal issues/politicians.

by Anonymousreply 14804/02/2011

I third R48's and R147's love for the Arby's quote... My sister and I use that all the time whenever we're deciding on places to eat.

by Anonymousreply 14904/02/2011

I think about the Arby's quote every time I see one.

by Anonymousreply 15004/02/2011

James Woods (to Apu): Is it true you once worked 96 hours straight?%0D %0D Apu: Oh yes, it was horrible. By the end I thought I was some sort of hummingbird.

by Anonymousreply 15104/02/2011

Now, where are my chili boots?%0D

by Anonymousreply 15204/02/2011

Fat Tony: I don't get mad. I get stabby.

Gay steelworker: Oh, be nice!

Krusty: Let's just say it moved me TO BIGGER HOUSE! Oh, I said the loud part soft and soft part loud.

Japanese worker at Mr. Sparkle factory: You have many question Mr. Sparkle. We send you premium number one answer question video!

by Anonymousreply 15304/03/2011

I was away at Bible Camp, learning to be more judgmental.

by Anonymousreply 15404/03/2011

something about the Doctor telling Homer he needed lifesaving heart surgery; Homer, of course, refuses. His reason?

Homer: "Doctor, no. That what doesn't kill me makes me stronger."

by Anonymousreply 15504/03/2011

The lead-in to the soap opera:%0D %0D "Like the cleaning of a house: IT NEVER ENDS."

by Anonymousreply 15604/03/2011

No one who speaks German could be an evil man.

by Anonymousreply 15704/03/2011

She admitted it! Lisa's going to marry a carrot!

by Anonymousreply 15804/03/2011

When faced with something extremely distasteful, I always make that shudder noise that Sideshow Bob made when he saw Selma's hairy legs in bed.

by Anonymousreply 15904/03/2011

"Old fashion hole'diggin, by god it's been a while!"--Old guy with long beard

"Super Nintendo Chalmers"-you know who

"Even my boogers are spicy"-you know who

by Anonymousreply 16004/03/2011

Homer gets Lenny to choose an ostrich for his ostrich burger, and says he will punch it to death. He approaches the ostrich pen. The ostrich chokes Homer and kick him three times in the stomach, very quickly.

Homer, in pain: Dude, I thought we were friends!

by Anonymousreply 16104/03/2011

See my vest! See my vest! Made from real gorilla chest!%0D %0D Like my loafers? Former gophers; it was that or skin my chauffeurs!%0D %0D -- Monty B.

by Anonymousreply 16204/03/2011

HOMER: I've seen plays more interesting than this. Honest to god, PLAYS!

by Anonymousreply 16304/03/2011

When I grow up I'm going to Bovine university.

by Anonymousreply 16404/03/2011

FREEMASONS RUN THE COUNTRY!!

by Anonymousreply 16504/03/2011

MONORAAAAIL! MONORAAAAAIL! MONORAAAAAAIL!

by Anonymousreply 16604/03/2011

Aw, you beat me to it r146!

by Anonymousreply 16704/03/2011

I thought of some more:

1. Homer: They don't call me Springfield Fats just because I'm morbidly obese.

2. Bart: My killing teacher says I'm a natural.

3. Homer: The winner will be showered with praise. The loser will be taunted and booed until my throat is sore.

4. Dr. Zweig: Yes, yes, it's all a rich tapestry...

5. Lisa: That'll learn him to bust my tomater.

by Anonymousreply 16804/03/2011

Back to the loch with you Nessie!

by Anonymousreply 16904/03/2011

"I feel so full of ... what's the opposite of shame?"

"Pride?"

"No, not that far from shame."

"Less shame?"

"Yeah."

by Anonymousreply 17004/03/2011

Homer's shrieking cracks me up. %0D %0D Homer: *shriek*! Shark Boy! %0D %0D Homer (to Mindy): Ha! I mean, ha-lo!%0D %0D Same with Homer's elaborate shudders of horror. Probably the funniest one was when Selma, trying to pretend that Homer was her husband, awkwardly says that she loves Homer, 'he is ... my whole world. I ... love him.' Cut to Homer, sitting at a diner with Lenny and Carl. He shudders and says 'I just felt a chill go through my very soul.'%0D %0D More:%0D %0D Flanders: Feels like I'm wearing ... nothin' at all! Nothin' at all!%0D %0D So many lines in the Switch-set-to-evil Krusty doll episode are great. "Marge, Marge - the doll's trying to kill me and the toaster's been laughing at me!" "You think your dirty socks can stop me? Well, they are making me kinda dizzy ..." %0D %0D

by Anonymousreply 17104/03/2011

Sorry doesn't put thumbs back on the hand, Marge.

by Anonymousreply 17204/03/2011

I come from the land of chocolate...Homer: the land of chocolate....%0D %0D The devil (ned flanders). Contract?! This is always so much easier in Mexico.%0D %0D Homer to Bart:%0D Lisa and I are going out for some gelato. We'd ask you to come, but, you know.

by Anonymousreply 17304/03/2011

R168, I was trying to remember #3 before but couldn't. Thanks.%0D %0D And also from #4's episode, I like -%0D %0D Marge: Whenever the wind whispers through the leaves I'll remember the name Lowenstein.%0D %0D Dr. Zweig: My name is Zweig%0D %0D Marge: Lowenstein

by Anonymousreply 17404/03/2011

Homer: Sweet merciful crap!

by Anonymousreply 17504/03/2011

I bent my Wookie.

by Anonymousreply 17604/03/2011

It's the beating of the hideous heart! I mean, I think I hear something.

by Anonymousreply 17704/03/2011

Message on a bookstore's sign:

Michener $1.99 a pound

by Anonymousreply 17804/03/2011

Ground's keeper Willie: It's called... The [italic]shinning[/italic]! Bart: I think you mean the shining. GKW: Shut up lad! Do y'wanna get sued?!

by Anonymousreply 17904/03/2011

Where's my burrito! Where's my burrito!

by Anonymousreply 18004/03/2011

I will party like it's on sale for $19.99!!

by Anonymousreply 18104/03/2011

When the family called 911 one time, the emergency dispatcher had been replaced by the Moviefone voice, asking them to select the corresponding number of the crime being committed. They hit a button, and it said "You've selected Regicide. If you know the name of the king or queen being murdered, press 1 now. "

by Anonymousreply 18204/03/2011

I'll never eat chili again... Ooooh! Chili!

by Anonymousreply 18304/03/2011

"I see they have the internet on computers now."

by Anonymousreply 18404/03/2011

We've run out of secret sauce. Here, put this mayonnaise out in the sun.

by Anonymousreply 18504/03/2011

"A bench!"

"That's not the way she tells it!"

"Oooooo! Five cents off wax paper!"

"Back in Nineteen Dickety Two"

by Anonymousreply 18604/03/2011

I forgot my all-time favorite one:

Homer to Lisa "I'm giving you my undivided attention"

by Anonymousreply 18704/03/2011

I wore an onion on my belt, as was the style at the time...

by Anonymousreply 18804/03/2011

The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the keypad with your palm now.

Hey, did you go to Hollywood Upstairs Medical College too?

by Anonymousreply 18904/04/2011

My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is NOT a porn star!

by Anonymousreply 19004/04/2011

Now go get me my dry-cleaning, which is my code word for scotch. And get me a scotch, which is my code word for my bookie. Also, go get my dry-cleaning.

by Anonymousreply 19104/04/2011

For day to day use I say, "I'm ON my way!!"

For just plain funny--Homer, mediating an argument between Lisa and Adil, their Communist exchange student: "Maybe Lisa has a point about America being the land of opportunity and maybe Adil has a point about the machine of capitalism being oiled by the blood of the workers."

For Arby's quote (what do their writers have against Arby's??!), in a Halloween ep, Homer eats a space blob because it was the only thing available to eat and then it tries to squirm out through his nostrils, "Oh no, if I can keep Arby's down, I can keep you down!"

by Anonymousreply 19204/04/2011

Sax-a-ma-phone.

Sax-a-ma-phone.

by Anonymousreply 19304/04/2011

Marge is teaching Lisa to sew and shows her the heirloom quilt she and her family have had for generations. The squares represent various events, various times periods, etc. One of the squares has R. Crumb's "keep on truckin'" image on it:%0D %0D Lisa: "Keep on truckin'." What does that mean?%0D %0D Marge: I didn't know then and I don't know now.

by Anonymousreply 19404/04/2011

"Ray BOLGER is looking out for Ray BOLGER!"

by Anonymousreply 19504/04/2011

"I call the big one bitey."

by Anonymousreply 19604/04/2011

Another one:

"A beer is a lot like a woman. They smell good, they look good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one."

PS:

Did Fox REALLY show one of the best episodes of The Simpsons during prime time last night? I wasn't sure if it was just in my location, but the episode that aired before "Bob's Burgers" was the one where Marge and Homer are telling the story of Lisa's birth/first word. I assumed that the episode was shown because Elizabeth Taylor played the voice of Maggie, but I wasn't quite sure.

It was surreal to finally see a good episode of The Simpsons on a Sunday night--something that hasn't happened in a decade.

by Anonymousreply 19704/04/2011

Pinchy would've wanted it that way!

by Anonymousreply 19804/04/2011

Oh, crap! I forgot about one of my favorites of all time (I even use it on a regular basis):

Homer: Marge...come to bed, Marge. It's good for what ails ya!

by Anonymousreply 19904/04/2011

Bob Dole doesn't need this.

by Anonymousreply 20004/04/2011

"Come back, zinc, come baaack!"

"Samantha, ne pas des boys."

"You love Shake and Bake--you used to put it in your coffee."

-"Lisa, what's the opposite of that schadenfreude thing-y?" -"Sour grapes." -"Wow, those Germans have a word for everything."

by Anonymousreply 20104/04/2011

Marge, you're not the world's worst mother. What about that freezer lady in Georgia?

Women and seamen don't mix.

Marge, there are only so many times I can say "I'm sorry," and still mean it.

Five John Denver Christmas specials.

But Marge, you gotta understand. I never thought you'd find out!

I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman.

Lord, bless this house and all who dwell within this rocket house.

by Anonymousreply 20204/04/2011

Lisa: There's no way I'll get into an Ivy League school now. At this rate I probably won't even get into Vassar.

Homer: I've had just about enough of your Vassar-bashing, young lady!

by Anonymousreply 20304/05/2011

[quote] Did Fox REALLY show one of the best episodes of The Simpsons during prime time last night? I wasn't sure if it was just in my location, but the episode that aired before "Bob's Burgers" was the one where Marge and Homer are telling the story of Lisa's birth/first word. I assumed that the episode was shown because Elizabeth Taylor played the voice of Maggie, but I wasn't quite sure.

Yea..they showed it everywhere.

by Anonymousreply 20404/05/2011

Homer is fondly recalling early married life: 'Even with a job, a young family and a new-born, I still managed to fit in six hours of TV a night.'

by Anonymousreply 20504/05/2011

Nelson (refusing to throw a balloon filled with paint on Ms. Krababble's wedding dress): But it's a Vera Wang *sob*

Other great Simpsons quotes at link.

by Anonymousreply 20604/05/2011

I had forgotten how many great Grandpa one-liners there are:

Homer: You better start making sense or we'll put you in a home!

Grandpa: You already put me in a home!

Homer: Then we'll put you in one of those crocked homes we saw on 60 Minutes!

Grandpa (meekly): I'll be good.

Also from the mind of Homer: "Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is: never try."

by Anonymousreply 20704/05/2011

Worst thread ever.

by Anonymousreply 20804/05/2011

It'll be a cold day in hell before I recognize Missourah!

by Anonymousreply 20904/05/2011

I use this one when talking about people I don't like. "You have an interesting friend. Let us hope something runs over her." or a variation like "maybe she'll be hit by a bus." from the Jacques/Marge bowling episode.

Can't think of any others that haven't already been said.

"As intelligence goes up, happiness goes down. See, I made a graph.. I make lots of graphs."

by Anonymousreply 21004/05/2011

Two montages come to mind:

"Dental plan...Lisa needs braces...dental plan...Lisa needs braces..."

and

"Mwhahahaha (demented clown laughs)...Iron helps us play...Hello, Joe!...Mwhahahaha...Iron helps us play...Hello, Joe!"

by Anonymousreply 21104/05/2011

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.

by Anonymousreply 21204/05/2011

Can't sleep. Clown'll eat me. Can't sleep. Clown'll eat me.

by Anonymousreply 21304/06/2011

Marge: What's brunch? Jacques: You'd love it. It's not quite breakfast, it's not quite lunch, but it comes with a slice of cantaloupe at the end.

by Anonymousreply 21404/06/2011

When I drop my glasses, I cry out "My image!" a la Elvis Costello.

by Anonymousreply 21504/06/2011

Lol R213, I remember when someone here posted a story about his boyfriend having a hideous clown doll in their bathroom. Someone posted: 'can't shit. Clown will eat me' and I died laughing.

by Anonymousreply 21604/06/2011

"Marge, I ate all of those fancy soaps you bought for the bathroom"--Homer

Homer: Everytime I learn something it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember that home wine-making course I took and I forgot how to drive?

Marge: That's because you were drunk!

Homer: And how!

"Well, you can't go wrong with COCKTAIL WEENIES! They taste as good as they look and they come in this delicious red sauce: it looks like ketchup, it tastes like ketchup, but brother, IT AINT KETCHUP!"--Homer

"I didn't think it was physically possible but this both sucks and blows."--Bart

by Anonymousreply 21704/15/2011

"Stealing! Haven't you heard those sermons from that guy at church? Captain whats-his-name? We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all of those 'Police Academy' movies? For fun? Well, I didn't hear anyone laughing! Did you? Except for that guy who makes all of sound effects...brrrr...whoom whoom...hah hah hee hee...Oh, where was I? Oh yeah, stay out of my booze!"--Homer, yelling at Bart when he was caught at a store stealing.

"I figured out the boy's punishment. First, he is grounded. No leaving the house, not even for school. Second, no egg-nog, make that no nog period. And Third, absolutely no stealing for three months"...--Homer, later on

by Anonymousreply 21804/15/2011

"Aw, cram it, churchy." - Kirk Van Houten

Smithers: I'm afraid we have a bad image, sir. Market research shows people see you as something of ogre.

Mr. Burns: I ought to club them and eat their bones!

by Anonymousreply 21904/15/2011

Homer: Marge for the first time, I can look down my nose at you. You have a gambling problem.

Marge: I do. Do you forgive me?

Homer: Oh sure, remember when I got caught stealing those watches from Sears? Well, you have a gambling problem! And remember when I let that escaped lunatic into the house because he was dressed like Santa Claus? Well, YOU HAVE A GAMBLING PROBLEM!

Marge: Homer, when you forgive someone you don't throw it back at them.

Homer: Oh, what a gyp. Hey, remember when...?

Marge: Homer!

Homer: Oh, I forgot already.

by Anonymousreply 22004/15/2011

Some Ralph Wiggum guotes:

This is my sandbox, I am not allowed to go into the deep end.

That's where I saw the leprechaun. He told me to burn things.

Fighting makes it tighter.

When the doctor said I did not have worms anymore, that was the best day of my life.

I bent my wookie.

Wanna play stuffed animal parade?

by Anonymousreply 22104/15/2011

Bart: Your half-assed over-parenting is worse than your half-assed under-parenting.

Homer: But I was using my whole ass.

"Don't go on strike. Just go to work everyday and do everything half-assed. That's the American way!"--Homer

by Anonymousreply 22204/15/2011

Mr. Burns: Smithers, there is a rocket in my pocket.

Smithers: You don't have to tell me, sir..

"Marge, you being a cop means you are the man and I am the woman, and I have no interest in that, except for the underwear thing, which, as we discussed, is a strictly a comfort thing"--Homer

"Now, on Afternoon Yack: My son still wets the bed..

Then, Milhouse is being dragged on stage by his mom and he says "You told me we were going to Red Lobster!"

by Anonymousreply 22304/15/2011

"DENTAL plan!"%0D %0D "Lisa need braces!"%0D %0D "DENTAL plan!"%0D %0D "Lisa needs braces!"%0D %0D "DENTAL plan!"%0D %0D "Lisa needs braces!"%0D %0D

by Anonymousreply 22404/15/2011

This is the worse day of your life... SO FAR.

by Anonymousreply 22504/16/2011

To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems.

by Anonymousreply 22604/16/2011

Another store name: Try and Save

by Anonymousreply 22704/16/2011

But why'd I have the bowl, Bart ... WHY'D I have the BOWL?

by Anonymousreply 22804/16/2011

r208 ... that's EVAH, dear.

by Anonymousreply 22904/16/2011

Not when Comic Book Guys says it, R229.

Favorite CBG quote, from the Halloween episode where he gets hit with a nuclear bomb. Right before it hits - "I have wasted my life".

As a fanboy, I can relate.

by Anonymousreply 23004/16/2011

Groundkeeper Willie: "Brothers and sisters are natural enemies. Like Englishmen and Scots! Or Welshmen and Scots! Or Japanese and Scots! Or Scots and other Scots! Damn Scots! They ruined Scotland!"

by Anonymousreply 23104/16/2011

Too many to remember, but this one came up recently:

"It started out as a Halloween costume, but it found its way into my regular rotation."

by Anonymousreply 23204/16/2011

Ralph Wiggim gets splattered by red paint and says "I look like cable TV!".

by Anonymousreply 23304/16/2011

"Lunch Lady Doris, have we got any grease?"

"Yes, yes we do."

"Then grease me up woman!"

by Anonymousreply 23404/16/2011

r169, my brother and I use "Back to the loch with you, Nessie" when any of our favorite sports teams play an especially lousy game. It's often abbreviated in text message form to just "Loch. Nessie." Other oft-repeated lines:

Ralph Wiggum: "Mr. Simpson, these tar fumes are making me dizzy." Homer: "Yeah, they'll do that." (lazily swigs beer)

Homer: "Two more feet and I can fit it in the fridge!"

Zombie Shakespeare: "Is this the end of Zombie Shakespeare?"

Homer (in a drunk love letter to Marge): "Five dollars? Get outta here."

Homer: "Probably misses his old glasses."

Krusty (during "The Big Ear Family" skit on "Tuesday Night Live" that's bombing from the onset): "Ugh. This goes on for 12 more minutes."

Homer (after Bart yells, "Go eat some flowers!"): "Oh no -- my secret shame!"

by Anonymousreply 23504/16/2011

Apu: I am selling only the concept of karmic realignment.

Homer: You can't sell that! Karma can only be portioned out by the cosmos. [slams door]

Apu: He's got me there.

by Anonymousreply 23604/16/2011

Homer: Yeah, and if you get kicked out of that one you%E2%80%99re going straight in the army where you%E2%80%99ll be sent straight to America%E2%80%99s latest military quagmire. Where will it be? North Korea? Iran? Anything%E2%80%99s possible with Commander Cuckoo-Bananas in charge.

by Anonymousreply 23704/17/2011

Please do not feed my god a peanut.

by Anonymousreply 23804/17/2011

Marge had a magazine once: "Better Homes Than Yours"

by Anonymousreply 23904/17/2011

Ranier Wolfcastle:

"That is some jacket, Skoie. It makes you look like a homosexual."

Audience:

BOOOOOO!!!!

Ranier Wolfcastle:

"Maybe you all are homosexuals!"

by Anonymousreply 24004/20/2011

Favorite Abe Simpson quotes:

Abe: All right, I admit it: I am the Lindbergh baby. Waah! Waah! Goo goo. I miss my fly-fly dada.

Friday: Are you trying to stall us, or are you just senile?

Abe: A little from column A, a little from column B.

---

Abe: Welcome home, Son. I broke two lamps and lost all your mail. [Marge walks away] What's wrong with your wife?

Homer: Never mind, you wouldn't understand.

Abe: Flu?

Homer: No.

Abe: Protein deficiency?

Homer: No.

Abe: Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis?

Homer: No.

Abe: Unsatisfying sex life?

Homer: N -- yes! But please, don't you say that word!

Abe: What, se-e-e-e-ex? What's so unappealing about hearing your elderly father talk about sex? I had se-e-e-e-e-e-e-ex.

Homer: [groans]

---

"My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star!"

"I'm an elk, a Mason, a communist. I'm the president of the Gay and Lesbian Alliance for some reason...ah, here it is. The Stonecutters."

"MAAAAAAAAAAATLOCK!"

by Anonymousreply 24104/20/2011

"You%E2%80%99ll have to speak up, I%E2%80%99m wearing a towel." - Homer

Sara Slone in 'My Best Friend's Gay Baby' (I love the poster)

by Anonymousreply 24204/29/2011

Olive oil? If your mother wasn't so fancy, we could buy our groceries at a gas station like normal people.

by Anonymousreply 24304/30/2011

Up and AT them!

by Anonymousreply 24404/30/2011

IOU one forbidden donut.

Signed, Homer

by Anonymousreply 24504/30/2011

Look at the size of that platform!

by Anonymousreply 24604/30/2011

Mr. Burns: This isn't rocket science, Smithers. It's brain surgery. Now hand me that ice cream scoop! [Puts Homer's brain on like a hat.] Look at me! I'm Davy Crockett!

by Anonymousreply 24705/01/2011

After Homer is cast from the Stonecutters:

Marge: %E2%80%9CHomer, you can%E2%80%99t just keep hanging out with these Colobus monkeys. Somebody%E2%80%99s gonna get parasites.%E2%80%9D

It's such a random thing that he's hanging around with the monkeys and the line is delivered perfectly with that typical Marge apprehension. Makes me laugh every time.

by Anonymousreply 24805/01/2011

I don't want to look like a weirdo! I'll take the muumuu.

by Anonymousreply 24905/01/2011

"Geriatric Profanity Disorder (or GPD)."

by Anonymousreply 25005/01/2011

You know who else is gay? Matlock!

by Anonymousreply 25105/01/2011

Homer: I think the government has better things to do than to read my mail.

(cut to agents reading letters from a bag called 'Simpson Mail')

FBI Agent: Most people write letters to movie stars. This Simpson guy writes to movies. "Dear Die Hard. You rock. Especially when that guy was on the roof. P.S: Do you know Mad Max?"

by Anonymousreply 25205/01/2011

After Homer gets hit with a baseball,Lisa: Dad has the worst luck when he's drinking.

When Ned has nervous breakdown : Oh,it's Lisa Simpson,Springfield's answer to a question nobody asked.

Mr.Burns to Smithers,as they are leaving the disastrous dinner at the Simpsons that costs him the Governors race: Brought down by a family of slack-jawed troglodytes,and yet,if I were to have them killed,it would be me who'd go to jail.

Homer: Look at it this way Marge,what if we picked the wrong religion,and all this time we're making god madder and madder?

Home at the dinner table: Those celebrity's could've been my ticket outta this stinking hell hole.

by Anonymousreply 25303/01/2013

TV ANNOUNCER introducing a soap opera: Like the cleaning of a house, IT NEVER ENDS.

SHERRY BOBBINS: I'm a completely ORIGINAL character, like Rickey Rouse or Monald Muck.

by Anonymousreply 25403/01/2013

Homer: I guess the only thing left is a murder/suicide pact.

Marge: That's a terrible thing to say!

Homer: Oh Marge. It's just an expression.

by Anonymousreply 25503/01/2013

I often try to incorporate elements of Simpsons quotes in order to see who's listening.

When I'm offered a drink at someone's home, I will often say "Ohh, just whatever you have on hand. How about a Clamato?" When they sheepishly apologize, I ask for Mr Pibb. And then I ask for soymilk.

by Anonymousreply 25603/01/2013

What're you cackling at, fatty? Too much pie, that's your problem!

Do you know what a baby is saying when she reaches for a bottle? She's saying, 'I am a leech'!

If you despise polite left-handers, then I doubt you'll like Ned Flanders, or his creepy little offspring, Rod and Todd.

AIEEE! Moth! Moth!

by Anonymousreply 25703/01/2013

The human wang is a beautiful thing.

by Anonymousreply 25803/01/2013

“You tried your best and failed miserably. The lesson is: never try.”

"Lisa, the point of [italic]Moby-Dick[/italic] is to Be Yourself."

by Anonymousreply 25903/01/2013

Lisa needs braces.

by Anonymousreply 26003/01/2013

So she was made of chimps!

by Anonymousreply 26103/01/2013

Dental Plan!

Lisa needs braces..

.....Dental Plan!

Lisa needs braces..

by Anonymousreply 26203/01/2013

Some gay quotes:

Karl: My mother told me never to kiss a fool! (Kisses Homer.)

***

John Waters: It's camp! The tragically ludicrous? The ludicrously tragic?

John Waters: No, Ultrasuede is a miracle. This is just good timing.

***

Julio: Homer, weren't you supposed to meet your wife half an hour ago?

Homer: D'oh! You guys don't have a gay time machine do you?

Julio: Jes. It's called Grady's shoe closet.

Grady: Hey, Julio? Ouch.

by Anonymousreply 26303/01/2013

Homer: Hey, what's Lucky joined up to? Nurse: It's a machine that breaths for him. Homer: And here I am using my own lungs like a sucker.

Homer: Don't discourage the boy, weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals...except the weasel.

by Anonymousreply 26403/01/2013

Wow, I'm pretty sure that I didn't post R177's message back in the day, but I could have as I love those examples!

But the mean German backpackers, Homer and '99 luftballons' is pretty priceless.

by Anonymousreply 26503/01/2013

Woo hoo! Cheap meat!

by Anonymousreply 26603/01/2013

Homer to Lisa: You barbeque-wrecking, know-nothing know-it-all!

by Anonymousreply 26703/01/2013

Marge, it's "Knight Boat"... the [italic]crime[/italic] fighting boat!

by Anonymousreply 26803/01/2013

How could I charge full price to the man whose lust for filthy magazines kept me in business during that first shaky year? ... Oh, by the way, here is your new issue of [italic]Gigantic Asses.[/italic]

by Anonymousreply 26903/01/2013

"Call Mr. Plow, that's my name, that name again is Mr. Plow!"

by Anonymousreply 27003/01/2013

Lol@r233

by Anonymousreply 27103/01/2013

I am familiar with the works of Pablo Neruda.

by Anonymousreply 27203/11/2015

"... when I'm done, you'll be a regular Burt Reynolds."

by Anonymousreply 27303/11/2015

That's it, back to Winnipeg!

by Anonymousreply 27403/11/2015

Hello, I'd like to speak with a Mr. Snotball, first name Eura.

by Anonymousreply 27503/11/2015
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