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Tops like bottoms, bottoms like tops

It is only versatiles that want everyone else to be like them. Why?

Tops are happy being tops, bottoms are happy being bottoms. Why do versatiles want everyone to change?

by Anonymousreply 6705/10/2013

is this provocation?

by Anonymousreply 103/12/2011

OP--Get some sleep and think about it tomorrow. I'm sure the answer will come to you.

by Anonymousreply 203/12/2011

R2 It is morning and I have had plenty of sleep but thanks for pretending to care.

by Anonymousreply 303/12/2011

Another well spent $18

by Anonymousreply 403/12/2011

[quote] Why do versatiles want everyone to change?

Because most of them are bottoms but are afraid to admit it.

by Anonymousreply 503/12/2011

I have a close friend who is a massively dicked exclusive top. Even so, he is obsessed with dick size, which I will never understand. he has even dumped other guys because their dicks weren't big enough for him, even though he has no interest in putting them up his ass. I cannot understand it.

by Anonymousreply 603/12/2011


by Anonymousreply 703/12/2011

Yawn. Another immature, desperately insecure queen looking for a rationale for his sexual peccadillos.%0D %0D The decline of DL continues unabated. Carry on, OP.

by Anonymousreply 803/12/2011

Well then, R3, you must be stupid. Hint: What kind of partner does a guy who wants to be both top and bottom need?

by Anonymousreply 903/12/2011

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!

by Anonymousreply 1003/12/2011

[quote]Why do versatiles want everyone to change?%0D %0D %0D Not exactly the correct way to phrase it. A [italic]versatile[/italic] wants a likewise partner because it's a more fulfilling act. Otherwise, it seems like role play.

by Anonymousreply 1103/12/2011

r6 I dated a guy like this in my 20's. 14 years later and we're still together.

by Anonymousreply 1203/12/2011

R11, I would think it only "seems" like role play if one of the guys involved is versatile but the exclusive top (or bottom) he's with is never willing to switch positions. If, however, neither is interested in doing something different (because they're both happy), then I don't see what the problem is. It truly is a matter of to each his own.

by Anonymousreply 1303/12/2011

Not necessarily saying it's a problem, R11. Mutually agreed between partners/spouses - that's fine. But OP wanted to know about versailes. Asked and answered.

by Anonymousreply 1403/12/2011

Sorry, R11, I misread your post and basically repeated what you said. That's what I get for trying to read DL while sitting in a restaurant waiting for my meal to arrive.

by Anonymousreply 1503/12/2011

because exclusive tops are usually insufferable, macho asses and exclusive bottoms are usually nelly queens who want to be the wife.

by Anonymousreply 1603/12/2011

r16 explains why tops and bottoms deserve each other.

by Anonymousreply 1703/12/2011

Honey badger is so versatile, he can turn himself around inside his own skin and fuck himself! In the mouth AND the ass!

by Anonymousreply 1803/12/2011

Honey badger = noodles.

Stop trying to make it happen.

by Anonymousreply 1903/12/2011

Versatiles are bottoms who don't want it getting around that they want they only want to get it up the butt. Watch their spirits rise when you announce you want to be the top- it's like a lightbulb being turned on. The relief on their faces.

by Anonymousreply 2003/12/2011

Versatile means bottom, but there are so few tops and I want some, so I will say versatile.

by Anonymousreply 2103/12/2011

Don't forget your coupon R15.

by Anonymousreply 2203/12/2011

Versatiles are ruining life for everyone -- they simply MUST be destroyed.

by Anonymousreply 2303/12/2011

My former fuck buddy was a bottom-only, but I didn't realize it at first since we didn't talk about it. At first it was okay, but towards the end it was frustrating that he didn't want to top even once in awhile. (That was OK, though - I got my revenge by not allowing him to ride me very often, which he loved). If you're versatile, make sure you get with someone else who's versatile. It's not worth the frustration that can result from it.

by Anonymousreply 2403/12/2011

Even guys who play versatile once or twice, are not going to keep it up. You need to be honest if you want the long term.

by Anonymousreply 2503/12/2011

Tops like bottoms, bottoms like tops and versatiles like both. How hard is that to figure out OP?

by Anonymousreply 2603/12/2011

I'm a bottom. My bf is a top. I'm much more masculine in affect, fwiw. It works. We're both very happy. About once a year, he gets a hankering to get fucked. I take a viagra and fuck him. No big deal. Do what you like and find someone compatible.

by Anonymousreply 2703/12/2011

I always see the ideal male couple as the big butch truck driver top and the flaming sissy interior decorator bottom, living happily ever after.

by Anonymousreply 2803/12/2011

Versatiles drive me nuts. And for every top there seems to be about 35 bottoms.

by Anonymousreply 2903/12/2011

Strict tops and strict bottoms drive me nuts.%0D %0D What kind of person cuts themself off from half the pleasurable experience. Hell, one of the best things about being a gay man, as opposed to any other possibility, is the ability to experience both insertive and receptive sex... to be equal to your partner, to make love on top AND on bottom, to share, to flip back and forth, to truly know and understand what your partner is feeling, regarddless of what position you're in.%0D %0D Strict tops and strict bottoms strike me as narrow-minded, closed-minded, afraid... SOMETHING.%0D %0D

by Anonymousreply 3003/12/2011

What about Jack and Ennis? Are they both versatile?

by Anonymousreply 3103/12/2011

R31 Good one! I wish we had found that out for sure in the movie. But all we could deduce was that Jack was the bottom since he bent over for Ennis in the tent the first time they had sex.

by Anonymousreply 3203/12/2011

It's funny how bottoms are so insecure that they want to claim that versatiles are also only bottoms. Newsflash: versatiles like it either way. I can top, I can bottom, I like both. The point is we like to switch back and forth. Doing exclusively one position is boring. I suppose it's the ADD generation coming to fruition sexually.

by Anonymousreply 3303/12/2011

[quote]About once a year, he gets a hankering to get fucked. I take a viagra and fuck him. No big deal.

How funny to read this on a site where the majority of posters (erroneously) believe that guys who fuck both men and women are gay only.

by Anonymousreply 3403/12/2011

I don't follow your logic R23.

by Anonymousreply 3503/12/2011

There's no logic to follow. I was making a joke.

by Anonymousreply 3603/13/2011

To each his own ladies! Now let's all hold hands and sing the caftan song.

by Anonymousreply 3703/13/2011

Sarong, in so many ways...

by Anonymousreply 3803/13/2011

r30, totally agree. I don't get the whole strict top/bottom thing at all. I just like being with another man, the specific sex act is much less important than my actual attraction to the man. I love the give-and-take of versatility, it makes sex so much more fun. I'm a monogamous type of guy so it would be very difficult to enter into a relationship with a strict top/bottom. I imagine it would be like a bisexual entering into a monogamous relationship with one gender, it happens but they probably won't feel completely satisfied.

by Anonymousreply 3903/13/2011

In versatile relationships do you both douche every fucking night?

by Anonymousreply 4003/13/2011

I think the thing is that some people don't want to bottom or don't want to top. It's just not what they want to do. It's not pleasurable to them to do one or the other. I do not like to top. I derive zero pleasure from it. It doesn't feel good. My bf doesn't like to bottom. He just doesn't. So, should we act like we enjoy a sexual act that we in fact don't? I hate being labeled a bottom, but I am one. I just am. I don't get why people are so shocked by this. I totally get versatiles. But I am not one and don't need to feel bad about that fact.

by Anonymousreply 4103/14/2011

Who are you mofos trying to fool. There are no TOPS. Doesn't exist in the gay male world. All of you are effeminate. Just some of you are so effeminate that in comparison the very few others look less girly. Top is a myth. Deal.

by Anonymousreply 4203/14/2011

One of my favorite signs on the clothes racks at Marshall's (and at Ross) says "Active Bottoms." Don't you know some queens in those stores marketing departments came up with that one?

by Anonymousreply 4303/14/2011

R43 Have you ever noticed the "Full Queen" sheet sets sold in those stores?

by Anonymousreply 4403/14/2011

r42 Big time dildo queen.

by Anonymousreply 4503/14/2011

That sounds nice, and is all well and good in theory, R30, but it ain't so in real life. Bottoming is NOT pleasurable in the least. It hurts like a muthafucker.

by Anonymousreply 4603/15/2011

Yes r40, we do.

by Anonymousreply 4703/15/2011

Correction 46, bottoming hurts uptight self-loathers like YOU. Those of us who are emotionally and psychologically comfortable with the act are also physically comfortable with it.

by Anonymousreply 4803/15/2011

So if tops only like bottoms and bottoms only like tops, why do you see some kind of inequity in versatiles only liking versatiles?

Why do find it somehow relatively inequitable that, rather that only being interested in your polar opposite, you would be interested in your versatile counterpart?

it seems analagous to a straight person saying straight women like men, straight men like women, only queers want people to be like themselves.

and, finally, what the fuck's wrong with wanting to fuck and be fucked? seems the most wholesome and natural thing in the world to me.

by Anonymousreply 4903/16/2011

Totally agree with you, R49. But I guess there could be any number reasons why some people are top-only or bottom-only. Maybe some people see topping as being in control, or having some sort of superiority over the bottom. Maybe some bottom-only people feel more comfortable being submissive or generally like to serve their partners. Or it could just be that they just like the way the particular position feels. Who knows?

by Anonymousreply 5003/16/2011

[quote]bottoming hurts uptight self-loathers like YOU. Those of us who are emotionally and psychologically comfortable with the act are also physically comfortable with it.%0D %0D %0D %0D So, using your logic, anybody that doesn't like scat is an uptight self-loather? %0D %0D %0D Look, I don't care if someone is a top, bottom or versatile. Whatever feels good to you is fine. But, don't try to label those that don't share your viewpoint as a self-loather.

by Anonymousreply 5103/16/2011

A sign at the Dollar General window today says

Homo Milk 1/2 Gal

by Anonymousreply 5203/16/2011

I was talking to one of my friends through text recently and he said he was at homo depot getting some paint.

by Anonymousreply 5303/16/2011

True Tops want Total bottoms and vice versa.

by Anonymousreply 5403/16/2013

He's a bottom. :-D

by Anonymousreply 5503/16/2013

Why are you DL queens so desperate to be just like heterosexuals? Not even straight people want to be heteros, anymore.

by Anonymousreply 5603/16/2013

After all this I still don't understand the OP's point.

As a versatile fellow I have never tried to change the desires and preferences of the men I've been with. The pleasure of being versatile in one's inclinations means that I don't arrive with a specific role or position.

However, I also have had the pleasure of helping both "tops" and "bottoms" become a little more flexible in their thinking and their enjoyments of sex. After all, being a top is not always or foremost a biologically based imperative. Being gay means we don't have to take such thinking literally, or use biology as an excuse for being afraid, controlling, limited or rigid. We can enjoy sex with each other in all its variety with each other.

by Anonymousreply 5703/16/2013

The bigger question is why did R54 want to bump this two year old played out topic.

by Anonymousreply 5803/16/2013

Maybe it's experience: every committed top I've ever met in my life lifted their legs in the air when they saw what I had between my legs.

by Anonymousreply 5903/16/2013

Yet you sound like a needy asshole.

by Anonymousreply 6003/16/2013

r59 here: it just happened again -- a guy whose nom de Manhunt is akin to "AggressiveTop" and who goes on and on about how he'll throw a mean fuck (but it's gotta be on the down low because he's married), emails me (my main pic is my penis) and declares he'd love to bottom for me some time!

by Anonymousreply 6103/23/2013

What is a versatile TOP?

by Anonymousreply 6203/26/2013

People who adhere to these rigid labels are nutty. Not when applied to one's self; it's fine if you're a top, bottom or anything in between. Its the people who expect all of us to neatly fall into one of three (or two) categories and then define us completely and permanently by that label.


by Anonymousreply 6303/26/2013

R63 sounds like one of those dreadful versatiles.

by Anonymousreply 6403/26/2013

Honey, without versatiles you'd never have sex again. Exclusive tops have waiting lists a mile long.

by Anonymousreply 6503/27/2013

Exclusive Absolute Tops are valued more than the others.

by Anonymousreply 6604/06/2013


by Anonymousreply 6705/10/2013
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