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Tina Louise: Alien Life Form

Can someone explain to me how actresses go out in public looking like this? You read about burn victims cowering in their houses because of self-consciousness about their injuries, and that's just a fear of going round the corner to the grocery story. So HOW can an actress go to a highly publicized public event -- like this?
replies 61Dec 7, 2017 7:40 AM +00:00

grocery STORE of course

--the magical land without an edit button
replies 1Dec 7, 2017 7:41 AM +00:00

Miss "Don't You Know Who I Am" Louise...poor thing. Her ship sailed ages ago...

replies 2Dec 7, 2017 7:42 AM +00:00

You give the snotty bitch too much credit. She wouldn't even reunite with us for friggin' ALF.

ALF visited Gilligan's Island! In the second episode of the second season of ALF, September 1987, the furry friendly alien becomes obsessed with Gilligan's I...
--Dawn Wells
replies 3Dec 7, 2017 7:44 AM +00:00

She can just walk right onset for the latest Star Trek and play a Gilliganian, a race of intergalactic castaways....

replies 4Dec 7, 2017 7:44 AM +00:00

Grandma, is that you?

replies 5Dec 7, 2017 7:46 AM +00:00

But I did for Roseanne, Dawn, you cunt.

--E.Tina Louise
replies 6Dec 7, 2017 7:47 AM +00:00

I don't see a problem
replies 7Dec 7, 2017 7:48 AM +00:00
Her ship sailed ages ago...

For a three hour cruise. A three hour cruise.

replies 8Dec 7, 2017 7:48 AM +00:00

She looks marvelous.

--Father Time.
replies 9Dec 7, 2017 7:50 AM +00:00

Ah don thee a pwobwem eiddah
replies 10Dec 7, 2017 7:52 AM +00:00

I think Joan's use of mortician's wax for a foundation is rather innovative r7.

--Zombie Max Factor
replies 11Dec 7, 2017 7:53 AM +00:00

Get a life OP- pic catching an old woman not in the best pose. Can't wait for you to be as old as she is and have clueless idiots snapping at your heels. Hopefully you will be so obscure that no one will and you will be safe from the cruelty.

replies 12Dec 7, 2017 7:56 AM +00:00

R10, are you Nell?

--Chicka bey ay
replies 13Dec 7, 2017 8:01 AM +00:00

Pro-tip: Drags and trannies have the best silicone hookups!
--P. Presley
replies 14Dec 7, 2017 8:04 AM +00:00

I bet that her pussy stinks.

--Dawn Wells
replies 15Dec 7, 2017 8:08 AM +00:00

OP - Thank you for taking time out of a busy day on the Milan catwalks to share with your fellow DLers your sheer disgust at an 83 year-old woman leaving home looking like an 83 year old-woman. You're beautiful.

replies 16Dec 7, 2017 8:10 AM +00:00

Unfortunately, R16, she doesn't look like a normal, 83 year old woman. She looks just like what she is: some idiot who has OD'd on bad plastic surgery. I know quite a few women in their 80's and 90's and they look a hell of a lot better than this unnatural freak.

replies 17Dec 7, 2017 8:16 AM +00:00

I think when you go from being a 10 like Tina was on the looks scale you’re bound to be more vain and plastic surgery bound over you’re looks. Must be a bitch going from perfection to old age. Sure she’s used to having her ass kissed and it’s hard to let that go. So she fucks up her face because she thinks she looks better.

replies 18Dec 7, 2017 8:17 AM +00:00

Yes I can appreciate that R17 I just think if she hadn't had any work done at all the same thread would be here. I am not being too serious- I have no idea at all what went on in Joan Van Ark's head when she did that to herself.

replies 19Dec 7, 2017 8:20 AM +00:00

This give me an idea for a sequel. Assuming I'll still have a career next year.

--Steven Spielberg
replies 20Dec 7, 2017 8:21 AM +00:00

C'mon folks, plastic surgery aside, the makeup jobs on their mugs is atrocious! They wouldn't look half bad if they'd just be objective about what they had to work with at this point in their lives and exentuate a less Kabuki style.

--Joan Van Ark's cadaverous lipstick
replies 21Dec 7, 2017 8:31 AM +00:00

^ accentuate

replies 22Dec 7, 2017 8:32 AM +00:00

She looks freaky!!! Scary.

replies 23Dec 7, 2017 8:32 AM +00:00

Now you know why I say to cover the fuck up, you hoochie!

--Dame Angie — my show ran four times as long as yours on the same network
replies 24Dec 7, 2017 8:33 AM +00:00

83,83,83,83 ! It bears repeating.

replies 25Dec 7, 2017 8:35 AM +00:00

I can cut her some slack in the looks department but what's going on with her ears?

It's like she has 2 different ear lobes now on each side. I've never seen anything quite like it in my life!

What's the cause of that?

replies 26Dec 7, 2017 8:40 AM +00:00

Yeah - R21 is on the money. There’s heaps of little old ladies who are wizened up - with or without surgery! - and they don’t look that different to Tina - with the exception being they’re not in full, over the top makeup and going out to go red carpet events, trying to look thirty or forty years younger. If you stripped Tina of her war paint and put her in a housecoat with a walker - she’d look like any other eighty-something in God’s waiting room.

replies 27Dec 7, 2017 8:49 AM +00:00

She’s old.

Has to be her 80s at least.

My father worked for her mother years ago and said the mother was a horrible person.

Mom had a big glamorous painting of herself in the living room.

replies 28Dec 7, 2017 9:03 AM +00:00

Will do, R12!

You're welcome, R16!

--Are you dears lost?
replies 29Dec 7, 2017 9:23 AM +00:00

She was born in 1934.

I used to think that she resembled Suzy Parker, but no.

replies 30Dec 7, 2017 9:25 AM +00:00

Turtleneck, she needs to go with turtlenecks.

replies 31Dec 7, 2017 9:28 AM +00:00
This give me an idea for a sequel. Assuming I'll still have a career next year. —Steven Spielberg

If I do this, I will only do one take of the "penis breath" line.

--Henry Thomas
replies 32Dec 7, 2017 9:33 AM +00:00

She needs to go with a full body bag.

replies 33Dec 7, 2017 9:57 AM +00:00

So what r28?
--Meatloaf...getcher meatloaf!!!!
replies 34Dec 7, 2017 10:01 AM +00:00

She should have just let herself get old. It's not like Scary Mutant Tina got so many more roles than Old Tina would have.

replies 35Dec 7, 2017 10:46 AM +00:00

Isn’t Halloween over?

replies 36Dec 7, 2017 10:53 AM +00:00

When Tina is around, EVERY day is Halloween!

replies 37Dec 7, 2017 11:36 AM +00:00

Omg R34! That portrait of Joan! By the ‘Big Eyes’ person?? (Or just in the style of it...?)

replies 38Dec 7, 2017 11:49 AM +00:00

Yes, r38, that actually WAS painted by Margaret Keane. It's kitsch squared.

replies 39Dec 7, 2017 11:55 AM +00:00

I sat next to her at a Broadway play a few years ago and she is even more difficult to look at in person. Her skin is burnt sienna, looks like severe jaundice but is likely makeup, crepey skin stretched over bones, couldn't have weighed more than 80 lbs.

replies 40Dec 7, 2017 11:56 AM +00:00

The worst part, r40, is when her face splits open and a long tongue with teeth on the end of it snakes out, looking for infants to drain.

replies 41Dec 7, 2017 11:58 AM +00:00

She’s a bitch.

replies 42Dec 7, 2017 12:05 PM +00:00

Isn't that picture from several years back? Is there anything more recent?

replies 43Dec 7, 2017 12:13 PM +00:00

That pic is 3 or 4 years old -- she's gotten her plastic surgery fixed some since then. This is her a couple months ago. Eyes are still wonky but the cheeks seem better and the makeup is vastly improved.

Imgur: The magic of the Internet
replies 44Dec 7, 2017 12:14 PM +00:00

So sad when these talentless old broads still try to look 25.

--Dame Maggie Smith
replies 45Dec 7, 2017 12:19 PM +00:00

She's got permanent Spock face.

replies 46Dec 7, 2017 12:20 PM +00:00

What the fuck did she do to her face? Yikes!!

replies 47Dec 7, 2017 12:32 PM +00:00

I've heard for years she's kind of uptight and nasty, but I spotted her in an L.A. shoe store I was browsing in a few years ago, and plopped down next to her on the bench. I told her how it was nice to meet her, and she was polite. Granted, you should never feel you have insight into a star just because they treat fans nicely in public...(that's just basic PR for them)...but given what I'd heard, I was prepared for her to be at least chilly. And she was fine. Actually, a bit flattered and warm.

replies 48Dec 7, 2017 12:37 PM +00:00

She needs to be hydrated under pressure in a sealed barrel for at least 24 hours. Her pussy must be dried shut.

replies 49Dec 7, 2017 12:41 PM +00:00

She’s 83. I think she looks pretty good. A little pulled , but so what? At least she’s not all bloated and puffed out like a marshmallow face.

replies 50Dec 7, 2017 12:50 PM +00:00

Pic in R44 is not too bad but the lower eye liner needs to go! Rule #1 for aging wimen is no lower eye liner. If its true that her mother was a bitch with a huge painting of herself in the living room, then poor Tina grew up with a mother that was competing with her instead of nurturing her. I feel sorry for her and wish her well.

replies 51Dec 7, 2017 1:04 PM +00:00

Maybe going with a decent hairstyle and something besides the clown red color would be more attractive. Even a nice wig.

replies 52Dec 7, 2017 1:08 PM +00:00

She would look wonderful if she weren't trying to wear young girl hair (same with Van Ark). After a certain amount of wrinkles, the ocasional eye-job and face lift, even outside the lip make up, will look good- IF complemented by a mature, strong, lady like hair frame. Not this trying to be Jennifer Aniston shit, that even Aniston herself can no longer pull off.

replies 53Dec 7, 2017 1:11 PM +00:00

I agree that it must be really difficult to age after becoming known for beauty and sexiness. Tina Louise had both, and I think she also had talent. She was surprisingly compelling in The Stepford Wives.

She turns 84 in February. I'm just happy to see that she's ambulatory.

And I have a soft spot in my heart for Ginger.
replies 54Dec 7, 2017 1:12 PM +00:00
replies 55Dec 7, 2017 1:16 PM +00:00

She should be wearing her old wigs from Gilligan's Island.
replies 56Dec 7, 2017 1:17 PM +00:00
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replies 57Dec 7, 2017 1:21 PM +00:00

she's 80+ you shallow shady ignorant queen!

replies 58Dec 7, 2017 1:50 PM +00:00

Ignorant? How dare you!

replies 59Dec 7, 2017 1:55 PM +00:00

She should really try wearing a high ponytail, they're adorbs!

replies 60Dec 7, 2017 2:01 PM +00:00

Jane, keep showing these miserable bitches how to do old. You've been fried, dyed and tied to the side to the Nth degree and yet you look completely fabulous, not like the crypt keeper Tina Louise.

replies 61Dec 7, 2017 2:05 PM +00:00