People who are bitchy and confrontational all the time...
What is their fucking problem? Do they realize how ridiculous they look? Do they want you to escalate the situation so they can get some sort of adrenaline buzz? Do they ever get their well deserved punch to the face? \
I work in retail and more and more it seems I come across these entitled cunts (of both sexes) who never seem to understand that they''re not the only people on the planet.
Sigh... Sorry OP it does seem to be more common now.%0D\
I would like to think that it is from the economy and stress over jobs and money but sadly I think society is just raising more and more of these assholes and reallity TV perpetuates it and rewards it.%0D\
Sorry you have to deal with it in your job so much.
What kind of R1 is that? For this thread? Shame. Shame.
This one girl I knew would actually wait for you to say something back so she could argue with you. You could feel her looking at you as you moved on with your life.
And yet by complaining about them OP you kind of become like them, no?
[quote]I work in retail\
There you go: you''re a *shopgirl*, dear. Your job is to serve, regardless of what I demand.
I''m more shocked by the casual acquaintance or newish co-worker who purposely ignores your obvious politeness and friendliness upon meeting! I guess their staring anywhere but at your face while you talk to them, or ignoring when you are addressing them makes it so much easier for them to ask you for something down the road. I always say "This exchange would be so much easier and nicer if you hadn''t decided to be such a bitch to me when we met, don''t you think?"
You only work in a shop, you know. You can drop the attitude.
I''m married (in California and 5 other states) to one of these. It''s not fun. It''s exhausting, actually.
Married in 6 states to someone bitchy and confrontational? How romantic!
R8, are you Derek''s sugar daddy?
I think they are actually depressed and lashing out because it energizes them. It is easier to feel anger than sadness.\
ALTHOUGH 20 something and teen girls seem to do this because they think it makes them look cute (and Daddy gives in to it)
You may be on to something R11, at least I hope so. There just seems to be soooo much entitlement and lack of courtesy. I used to think they were all stupid people who were in the "anger phase" of them realizing how dumb they are. \
I deal with at least 1-5 dickheads a day and I don''t ever lose my cool, I''ve been doing this for 3 years. I don''t understand what makes a person want to muck up a perfectly normal and pleasant transaction with aggressiveness for no reason. It has to be mental illness. \
R8, I condole you. Seriously. I dated one for about 6 months and it was hell. It wasn''t worth the nice dick at all.
Oh, you work in retail?%0D\
Well, stop hovering over me when I''m browsing and vanishing when I want to ask a question, and stop trying to sell me store credit cards, telling me about offers for stuff I don''t want, websites I can register for, explaining complicated bargains I can get if I buy five more items, and just ring up my fucking purchase. %0D\
OP, it''s because in a store, they have one of the very few chances to exercise their power. Probably most of them don''t have much power outside. %0D\
I agree that reality shows are partly responsible for this. People like the Jersey Shore cast get hundreds of thousands of dollars for behaving in an appalling way, and so the audience thinks that''s a fun way to behave.%0D\
I''m glad you don''t show your anger, though. In my experience, any time I''ve blown up at someone over rudeness, I just feel bad about myself afterward. Not the ideal reaction, I know, but there it is.
My local Whole Foods is just filled with these horrible people.%0D\
I have to tell myself as I walk through the doors that I am now entering the ME zone. Everyone is just out for themselves. NO ONE ever says "excuse me" or "pardon me" they all feel that ONLY THEY matter and no one else.%0D\
It'' not that they just have no manners these days it''s deeper like a confrontational thing.
I wear myself out when I have an angry day--I assume everyone else is the same. Can''t imagine how people who are always so "on" or pissy get through the day. \
But anger raises adrenaline and that can be like a rush, as R11 noted. It does make you feel a little better physically, at least in the short term.\
R15 is on to something. You have to use little tricks so these people don''t suck you into their horrid behavior. If you don''t expect people to behave on your terms, then you''re not so likely to be disappointed and react.\
And, as noted, our culture glorifies trashy behavior.
Oh God, Whole Foods. %0D\
On a road trip, I went into a Whole Foods for lunch. I couldn''t find the usual pizza counter, so I asked a deli guy where it was. The poor man cringed when he told me this branch didn''t serve pizza, and looked visibly relieved when I thanked him and ordered something else. I have to assume that self-absorbed ranting at the staff is common there.
This was in Marin County
[quote]My local Whole Foods is just filled with these horrible people\
What is the deal? Whole Foods and Central Market attract the most self-absorbed customers. They block aisles, cut in front of other customers, and are so snotty to the clerks. It''s not every customer, but I see nasty behavior at those stores that I never see at the regular grocery stores.
R13, I own a small mom and pop shop. What you''re describing is the mandatory script given at those dime a dozen chains you frequent. The employees get "secret shopped" by assholes such as yourself every day to make sure they''re offering socks, a belt and an American Eagle Super Savers Club card with every purchase. They''re fired if they stray from the clunky script more than a few times.\
It''s stupid and patently obvious that none of the management dbags who make these rules ever actually worked or shopped in the trenches. If you don''t like that kind of treatment, shop at smaller stores or write a nasty letter to corporate.
OP, it felt good to be an asshole to you
People are savages.%0D
Too few realize that the least application of manners and consideration is meant as the grease in the machine of human interaction, and seem instead hell-bent on making every little thing into a Bridezilla moment.%0D
Years ago there was a journalist who interviewed a group of what would be called "at risk youth" over a long period. Typically he interviewed them at fast food restaurants, treating them to meals. The kids chastised him for saying "Please" and "Thank you" and not being more aggressive in his ordering stance, and thought him unsophisticated for not insisting on special orders and especially for not returning food an order that was somehow skimpy -- too few fries, a missing pickle slice, a somewhat mashed burger bun... They viewed their act of consumerism as a platform for holding the upper hand, and the opportunity for being the boss of a situation no matter how small. Surely they thought a person with advanced degrees and exposure to aspects of life far beyond their own would know these things?%0D
The same Rumpelstiltskin thing of demonstarting rage plays out at all levels of commercial interaction, and on both sides. %0D
It would wear me out if every transaction and interaction were frought with such confrontation.
OP people are miserable in their home life and work. Any time they''re in public they lash out where they know there will be no consequences for being a cunt. \
My suggestion? Be a cunt right back. I have mastered the "I dont care look". People know that means all their bitchiness is going in one ear and out the other. They are looking for attention and a reaction. If you dont give any they stand down.
Former Retail Queen
I was volunteering at a BENEFIT to promote anti-violence; there was a silent auction for the VIPs; I asked someone if I could go in and look around; I like to see the items and sometimes you can get a steal on something if no one is bidding. %0D\
A woman SNARLED at me for even asking; I almost said: Really? Lady, this is an ANTI-VIOLENCE event so while I''m tempted to SMACK YOU I won''t.%0D\
People are rude!
If I want cheese on my burger, I''ll ask for it!
That''s really interesting. I have an employee who grew up in the projects and I can''t go to lunch with her anymore, it''s embarrassing the way she treats servers. I''ve told her and she says "they should get a real job." Jesus.
My post was directed at R20
It''s a pattern and a habit with them. They quickly learn they get their way much of the time when they have a fit, so the behavior is reinforced. In a store, employees and managers both want to just shut up the squeaky wheel before things escalate.\
People don''t like to be confrontational, so they let the angry people flare up and move on just to avoid problems.\
Also, to be quite frank, a lot of people are very tired of poor service in stores. I live in a college town and from August through October, when the new students arrive, the bitchy and confrontational people are the employees and not the customers. Customers in return assume that they have to fight to get any service, and they become confrontational by default.
When I have something on my mind, I''m distant and probably seem unfriendly to randoms. If I''m pissed about something or in a hurry, I may come across as rude. It has nothing to do with whoever I happen to be interacting with. In fact, I hardly even see them. No one should take it personally, I''m just living my life. I don''t care about them and they shouldn''t care about me. Likewise when I''m feeling like chatty cathy and get the brush-off from someone who''s got something on their mind, I don''t give a fuck. It has nothing to do with me.
One of the sub-project managers on my current project is like this. She''s all fake sweet to your face, but if you even dare to question a decision or point out a flaw in her logic, she gets super snotty. She''s not only this way with me (I''m contractor working for the same client she it), but she''s the same way with her own staff. She can be snotty to the client, as well as the overall PM at times. For insignificant reasons. She''s way over 30, never married, no BF that I can tell, not particularly attractive, and has "old lady posture" for a young woman. I think she''s just a bitter old maid. I on the other hand am fit and trim, well groomed, well dressed, and well spoken, (and well laid). Jealous much you bitchy twat?
In the Barbara Ehrenreich book where she works at Walmart for a month, she finds herself initially puzzled at just how bad the average Walmart shopper behaves toward the employees, particularly in the clothing department where people strew things around the department seemingly for the hell of it.\
Then she realizes that these people have absolutely no power in their own lives or control over their own destinies, and the one tiny shred of illusion of power comes from behaving that way to the few people in the world who have to take it.\
It''s the same bottled and misguided rage that leads minimum-wage workers to conclude that other poor people are the cause of their problems, and it''s a phenomenon exploited brilliantly by the Republicans in recent elections.
Nice point, r30.
[quote]Whole Foods and Central Market attract the most self-absorbed customers.\
R18, are you not aware that there are only eight Central Market stores, all in Texas, and 95% of DataLounge has no fucking idea what you''re talking about?\
Btw I assume you must live in Dallas or Plano. The customers at the Austin Whole Foods and Central Market stores are perfectly pleasant and lacking in entitlement.
Is the last part of R28''s post supposed to be a parody?
I think that the rude people with entitlement issues are -- for the most part -- a miserable lot. It saps so much energy to be a bitch all the time.\
I try and go out of my way to be nice to everyone. It just makes life a lot easier.
R30, That is an interesting point. I wish I could say something to these assholes like "You''re giving me some good indications that the rest of your life is shitty, I wish you could control yourself from trying to make this 5 minutes of my life as shitty as yours."
Agree with R32
[quote][R18], are you not aware that there are only eight Central Market stores, all in Texas, and 95% of DataLounge has no fucking idea what you''re talking about?\
Since Central Market follows Whole Foods in the sentence, most people can guess what it is from the context. And I''m quite sure 95% of Datalounge is not so incensed about the matter as you seem to be. I certainly wasn''t perturbed when I read about Gristede''s in Datalounge threads. And I managed to figure out what Duane Reade was without a handbook.\
[quote]Btw I assume you must live in Dallas or Plano. The customers at the Austin Whole Foods and Central Market stores are perfectly pleasant and lacking in entitlement.\
I''m in Houston. The Central Market store I had in mind is the one on Westheimer near Weslayan. Maybe the self entitlement is magnified by the proximity to River Oaks, I''m not sure. But I saw some ridiculous behavior at the Dallas store on Greenville at Lovers Lane when I lived up there.
You ask this *here*, OP? Are you doing an experiment or into self-abuse?
These comments are interesting because I have found that I abhor going shopping anywhere other than online because the salespeople are so rude nowadays, not just the customers.
In a nutshell OP- unhappy people. People who are comfortable in their skins and lives, tend to be polite and respectful.%0D\
In addition, I have found as I have grown older that saying good morning to people, noting how cute pets and children are, helping elderly get around in public when I can, being polite, and in general trying to make others days slightly better with the briefest of kindnesses, makes me feel better, about just about everything.%0D\
Some things about aging are good.%0D\
You get what you give essentially.
Look them straight in the eye and say, "Don''t ever mistake being polite for being stupid."\
Works well on belligerent co-workers.
Amen, r40. Also I have often found that it is easier to get what you want/need from someone who serves the public, if you are polite and considerate and acknowledge them as a human being (i.e. Hi, how are you?)
Years ago I worked in a 7-11 store. I was shocked at how rude some of the customers could be. It got so I was anxious about going to work because of the inevitable asshole brigade I''d have to deal with that day.
"When I have something on my mind, I''m distant and probably seem unfriendly to randoms. If I''m pissed about something or in a hurry, I may come across as rude. It has nothing to do with whoever I happen to be interacting with. In fact, I hardly even see them. No one should take it personally, I''m just living my life. I don''t care about them and they shouldn''t care about me. Likewise when I''m feeling like chatty cathy and get the brush-off from someone who''s got something on their mind, I don''t give a fuck. It has nothing to do with me."\
R28=autistic, or at least unaware/contemptuous of others and extremely grouchy and rude.
We used the recession & job cuts to get rid of two staff members who were like this. I had tried to work with one of them on her overall "communication tone", but to no avail.\
One of them was a highly productive employee, but in the end what gets remembered most is not how much work she got done, but how tense and unpleasant it felt to interact with her. \
It''s been such a relief to have them both gone, and to have a slightly smaller office full of collegial and non-rude people.
No, r44, just living a full life, aware of my priorities, and telling it like it is.
Bumping because R38 makes a good point. Why are people bitchy and confrontational all the time on the internet? Because they can get away with it?
We have a term for those who are constantly bitchy and confrontational: New York Jews.
So wrong, R49. NY Jews are just assertive, and some of them make really good friends. Your antisemitism = your loss. \
Truly and needlessly bitchy and confrontational? That''d be young people trained by reality TV. You know the ones:\
"So I''m like if SHE gets in MY face I''m gonna SAY something, because the thing about ME is... "
There was a woman like this on the jitney the other night.%0D
First, I was at the bus stop and she came barreling over and tried to knock me down. I didn't budge, nor did I look at her. I pulled out my phone and started reading the paper.%0D
As soon as she got on the jitney (it was the first stop) she went right to the seat behind the driver, where they keep the newspapers and the snacks they pass out during the trip and took the boxes off and started throwing the newspapaers on the floor. The steward told her to stop doing it and the woman went into a rage, screaming that "you people have no right to take up this seat." She claimed it was the only seat where she could use her laptop, which is not true. Everyone uses their laptop. She raged for a full 5 minutes. %0D
Then she got on her cellphone and began talking loudly, complaining about the bus, complaining about some museum she'd been to and how rude they were "not at all like the Museum of the Illegal Immigrant." (I don't know where that museum is, but it's definitely not in NYC). The steward told her the jitney has a policy - no phone use unless an emergency and no more than 3 minutes. The woman starts raging "Well the bus isn't moving! Once the bus starts moving, I'll get off the phone! Now go away and leave me alone!"%0D
The steward called the jitney's main office - no doubt hoping to get the ok to eject the woman from the bus, but instead must have been told to just cool down and let the lady be a pain in the ass until the next bus stop, because the steward came back on the bus and said, "All you had to do was ask and we would have moved the papers and boxes."%0D
Anyway, once the bus filled up, the bitch was quiet. Passengers on the jitney really don't put up with bad behavior from other passengers, since they are paying primo prices for a quiet ride. I guess the bitch knew this and got her rage on before the bus took off.
One of them told me he was taking antidepressants which gave him anxiety and for which he was taking Wellbutrin and that on bad days it was because he forgot his Wellbutrin. I''m serious. He created more work than he accomplished. Of course now he is a highly successful vp with a different company.%0D
God R15, I could''ve written your post. NO ONE says excuse me or moves their cart out of the way. I''ve been jostled and cut-off many times.%0D\
A guy working there was carrying/juggling a few items and he dropped one. I walked over to him and picked it up and placed it back on top of his stuff and said, ''there you go.'' He was speechless for a moment and then smiled and thanked me like I had just given him $100 bucks.%0D\
I did nothing out of the ordinary.
It''s become socially acceptable, OP. \
A woman I started working with about a year ago, upon our first introduction, said "I''m a real bitch to work with." And boy, was she ever right. She''s snotty, condescending, unresponsive, blames others for her errors, and in general thinks her shit doesn''t stink. But she wore it as a badge of honor in that first meeting.
Don''t know what their excuse is in real life, but the anonymity of the internet definitely encourages these malcontents to act over the top. I just had a run-in with one of these needlessly bitchy and confrontational posters who flew into a little rage and called me names after I politely expressed a different opinion from theirs. There wasn''t even anything witty or clever about the insults, just hyperreactive vitriol. The absurdity of the reaction made me laugh, but in real life I probably would have punched this person in the face.\
Why it''s so hard for some people to be even remotely civil, I have no idea. We were opining about a trivial and inconsequential topic, and I shudder to think how this poster would have reacted if it had actually been an important and serious issue we were discussing.
Everyone is a star!
people who are confrontational are usually jealous, depressed, and pretty much mean people..they prey people who are pleasant, nice, have good personal relationships..they might be popular on the job...%0D\
you cannot totally ignore a c-person because they will still stick it too you...that''s the way they operate...%0D\
if this c-person is in your office..then tell your superior..if this is on the outside tell this person if you get in my face one more time i''ll stick this pen right up your nose...%0D\
now get lost...unfortunately at times it comes to this...they need help to overcome their depression...
I use self-scanners so I don''t have to deal power tripping cashiers.
[quote]We used the recession & job cuts to get rid of two staff members who were like this. I had tried to work with one of them on her overall "communication tone", but to no avail.\
[quote]One of them was a highly productive employee, but in the end what gets remembered most is not how much work she got done, but how tense and unpleasant it felt to interact with her.\
[quote]It''s been such a relief to have them both gone, and to have a slightly smaller office full of collegial and non-rude people.\
Did they go quietly, or did they try to sue?
Agreed, Charlie/R40!!! I used to cringe when people were rude or distant to me, especially if I''d gone out of my comfort zone to make pleasantries.\
Now, I take kindness where I get it, and always, ALWAYS am so pleasant when shopping that customers ask if I work there. I love helping little old ladies and men find stuff, even if it''s out of my way.\
And there''s an extra bit of universal approval there because I''m black in the South, and sometimes the white people seem afraid to ask a question. I guess rudeness is the default today, and I see them cringing like I used to do.\
BTW, I have a question on a similar topic, but I''ll start a new thread for that.\
But I''m naturally a distracted type, so I go out of my way to no look "difficult" in public. Sometimes you have to put on the mask. After a while, it gets easier to wear.
Here on DL it seems to be the norm!
Honey badger don''t give a shit it just takes what it wants.
[quote]No, [R44], just living a full life, aware of my priorities, and telling it like it is%0D\
Slap her, Wilona!
R20 and R24, they love to be abusive when they can get away with it.
The problem now days in employees believe they are entitled. They forget their place. I'm not saying take abuse, but you are an employee and you should conduct yourself in that manner. If you're rude to a customer they can go somewhere else to buy the same product. Then if enough customers leave your store to go somewhere else to buy the same product then guess what you won't have a job. So in today's economy what you need to do is be thankful you have a job but your tongue and do your job.
Let's look at it from the other side:
Where has customer service gone? People don't even try anymore. I recently went to Best Buy to purchase a television and I ended up dealing with the "team lead" or some such person in that department because the girl who processed my order messed it all up and because of that I wasn't able to get the TV. The team lead girl did not apologize at all. She didn't offer any solutions. I did raise my voice and ask her to please be solution-oriented, but she didn't offer anything. Another male employee walked by during this interaction and told me to "be respectful" to her. That just angered me even more. Stay out of it and don't pull this macho bullshit that you have to protect her. If she can't handle being the team lead that isn't my issue. I ended up going to Costco for the television. That whole experience ruined my whole day. Sigh...
Carisa, are you reading this?
Having paid and received my change at a supermarket, I realized that I had been automatically saying "please" and "thank you" throughout the transaction, but it had not been reciprocated. I pointed out this apparent irony to the checkout clerk, who replied, "You should thank US for giving you the food." That's when I lost it.
[quote] People who are bitchy and confrontational all the time...What is their fucking problem?
Oh, the irony.
I can't figure out if I become more sensitive as I age, or if people are, in fact, getting worse. I think social media has made it worse; and the sense that we shouldn't embrace flaws or age or deep intellect or emotion.
I do think there's a lot of untreated depression and anger being haphazardly flung around. This combined with our stupidly competitive society, and we unwittingly become the targets of a lot of free-floating malaise/depression/anxiety/one-up-manship.
I always just tell myself that people like that--the rude, angry, belligerent--they're not truly happy and their own lives are punishment enough.
Reality tv now sets the standard for public behavior. I find less politeness in retail and service situations than I do in daily work and social interactions.
Years ago "the customer is always right" prevailed and businesses did all they could to train staff in the proper way to deal with the public. This went for high end stores right down to the local five and dime.
Some of the behavior is purposely rude, but most comes from ignorance. Our office had several college interns during the summer, and they had to be trained in the proper way to answer phones, conduct a brief conversation, then end the call. Really, no idea how to do it professionally.
My pet peeve is the "no problem" response I get from servers and cashiers.
I worked in retail once. A Christmas job, thinking it'd be quick and easy money. It was at a Radio Shack store, they were thrilled to get me. I was as helpful as I could be. On my third day a local minister I did not know and waited on thanked me and told me I'd not last a week there. Why? "People can be horrible." I didn't make any real money. But I realized other than the temp help these guys were working full time there and were family men and this is what they did in life, this is how they lived. Soon I began looking differently at people behind counters. Most customers I had were ok, but the bad ones, filled with "attitude," made me realize they used the shopping experience just to beat up on the help so they could feel better about their own potty little lives.
Since, I approach counters with an attitude ... one of I'm happy to be there and happy they will be able to help me. Usually makes for a nice shopping experience. And soon, Jonathon at the market will be in my bed.
I think it is definitely getting worse. I was driving in Wilmington NC and stopped at intersection that I need to cross. Because I did not turn right - which I didn't want to do- the woman behind got out of her car and started beating on the window, screaming obscenities at me until the police officer that I called came (after she tried to break the car window with her shoe). She told the officer, after screaming at him for awhile that she was late for work - which by then she surely was - and that I was supposed to turn right if she wanted me to. Unfortunately for her, I was an assistant district attorney then and between the officer and I, we went her to mental health for an evaluation. When I lived in Wilmington, there was an incident like that every day. I moved to Charlotte, which is a little better, but I definitely agree that people's conduct is getting worse and worse.
I agree that some people go shopping just to have a temper tantrum. I was in macy's recently when this very pleasant assistant was waiting on me. This woman came up and demanded to see item. He politely told her in essence to wait her turn, but my boyfriend was with me and he hates shopping, so I told the assistant that we could wait a minute and to go ahead.
The woman completely disregards me and pushes me aside to get to the associate to show him something - my boyfriend does not like that. He used to work in retail and waved at the camera for security, which came. The whole time this woman is screaming at this associate about some item, and the associate, I swear, behaves perfectly nicely. Security and assistant manager get there, and she starts screaming about how the associate had grabbed her, which did not happen. We stayed to back up the associate, although I don't think he was in any real trouble. The cameras would have seen if he touched anybody but, nobody got any shopping done!
[quote]I did raise my voice and ask her to please be solution-oriented, but she didn't offer anything.
Did you really say that? "Please be solution-oriented"? What an Aspie-esque turn of phrase.
I used to work in a big UK dept store. My boss was amazing and drilled into us the importance of customer service. Many customers who came in as a customer left as her friend, and she is still in touch with some I f them now, 15 years later (I started young!)
Now, I'm the customer and service ranges from getting brilliant service in grocery stores to poor service in Dept stores. If the service has been really great or really bad, I let them know in the moment, followed up with a letter to head office (always ask for a reply!)
I've had many bad experiences, and the best thing you can do is speak to the management there and then, do not make a purchase, and explain why
It's easy: deal with men, ignore the women. And, yeah, I am a firm believer in using the word "cunt". Those days of respecting women for no other reason than because we are told to are over.
Thankfully, the gentleman's agreement still exists. Why we rule the fucking world.
You're an ignorant piece of shit, R77.
I hope you get run over and the cunt ER doctor refuses to help you.
I too am sick of white women. Every where I work I come across another passive aggressive white woman and they always cause problems. They are rewarded for their passive aggressiveness especially if the manager is an inexperienced straight male.
Women are typically the meanest customers in a store, but I wouldn't say they're the worst employees. If you're looking for a courteous, helpful shop person, gender really doesn't matter: the level of disinterest coming from them is roughly the same.
But seriously, on the customer front: I've worked in retail for 13 pointless fucking years, and women are THE WORST.
I worked in a store as a cashier for a year over twenty years ago, and it was white women who drove me crazy, holding up the line with "Wait, I've got the exact change," while they dug through their pocketbook for fourteen cents so they didn't have to carry any extra change. Only very few white men did this, and almost no blacks, male or female. White women didn't give a fuck how long the line was behind them.
Oh, and I'm white.
Want to know the truth, asshole?
Here it is:
Life is really unfair to some people.
The fucking narratives that are out there are appalling: with God you can win! With medication you can live! With adventure you can thrive!
The truth is that for some of us, the world has beaten the shit out of us, and we will never, ever be happy.
I can hear you cracking your fingers right now, getting ready to tell me YOUR story, or how you just KNOW that etc and etc will make everything good again.
No. Some of us have been hurt very, very badly, and our lives are just sour.
But it's the kind of pain that doesn't ENTIRELY disable you - that's the hell of it. You're not clinically depressed - hell, you're not even in a bad mood a lot of the time.
But holy shit do you have hate in your heart, all the way down.
And you don't really like people anymore, and hate activities, and find forced emotions to be about the worst thing in the world.
So - that's it. And we know we're fucked, too, and that we make other people unhappy. It sucks - don't feel sorry for us, and certainly don't try to understand - if this isn't what's happened to you, then that is truly fantastic. I envy you.
But fuck this stupid, stupid world.
The problem is herpes. Most people act out with a herpes outbreak. They are in pain, but can't talk about it because it's a private thing in their underwear. Also, they are ashamed of having it and feel dirty and unlovable.
Herpes is why women have become so rude in public within the last twenty years.
their buttplugs are too loose. they simply need to trade in for a larger size
And sometimes people get rust on their buttplugs, R84. Those need changing ASAP, and so few bother.
[quote]The kids chastised him for saying "Please" and "Thank you" and not being more aggressive in his ordering stance, and thought him unsophisticated for not insisting on special orders and especially for not returning food an order that was somehow skimpy -- too few fries, a missing pickle slice, a somewhat mashed burger bun...
R20, just cut to the chase and say "black kids". Thanks.
So the next time some entitled asshole gives you a hard time just say "you know, there are topical creams to help with the burning" and smile.
cry me a river. We ALL have had tremendous pain in our lives--good grief, what a pity-party you are!
In fact, I believe my painful life has made me a NICER person. I have more compassion for strangers than most people.
And my trauma has given me a gift: I believe I can see a person's childhood in their eyes.
Polite, kindly people are more often than not victims of intense suffering.
"What is their fucking problem?"
And in the gay male community that usually means tinymeat and/or aging-out of the bottomboi category.
People who are getting laid good 'n often are able to laugh off things easily.
I agree with R88. I've used the adversity in my life to develop more empathy. Anytime I chose bitterness, I felt angry and exhausted and alone. I just try to be more sympathetic. However, I certainly don't let someone get away with being bitchy to me. Someone wrote earlier (I'm paraphrasing) that kindness and pleasantries grease the wheels of human interaction. I agree. Isn't it a better world when you're not dealing with a bunch of fucking cunts?
R88, I anticipated your reply in my own post.
The worst people in shops, in my experience, are blonde, skinny (white) middle-aged women.
Whenever I'm in line at the cash and a woman of that description is behind me, I let her go ahead or I just walk around until she's done.
Inevitably she's uptight, bitter, impatient and all around horrible. Call me crazy for generalizing like this; I'm white woman too, albeit a brunette.
you forgot to say heterosexual.
Lesbians of all races are not squabblers in lines. They just want to get the hell out of there, like a straight guy.
Hey, just recognized my own 3 year old post as r8! I'm not married anymore. Bitchy and confrontational only got worse.
True R93, I'm the same way being half-gay and all. Just let me find what I need, pay for it, and get the heck out.
[quote]Having paid and received my change at a supermarket, I realized that I had been automatically saying "please" and "thank you" throughout the transaction, but it had not been reciprocated. I pointed out this apparent irony to the checkout clerk, who replied, "You should thank US for giving you the food."
Wow, what a stupid bitch.
Years ago, I saw a great sign in the staff room of a local Costco. It was a reminder to the employees that "The customers are NOT overhead. YOU are overhead. The customers are the reason this business exists."
Agreed, R88 and R90. I think because of all my pain and loss, I've become deeply grateful for what I do have. I'm kind when others aren't. I help out even though I haven't been asked.
Someone like R83 just passes the pain along to others, continuing the cycle. It's a rough way to go through life, both for that person and everyone around him/her.
Vile poster R96, not helpful to morale. Employees should be treated as an asset, not a cost.
I don't believe that sign was in a Costco. And congrats to r94