Annals of Terrible TV Performances

Name an actor on a popular or acclaimed TV series whom you think was guilty of really bad acting. \ \ I''d offer David Schwimmer on "Friends." Not so much a performance as a collection of tics, hangdog expressions and occasional bursts of mania ("WE WERE ON A BREAAAAAAAK!"). It was never a good performance but it grew increasingly wretched in the last season or two of the show, where the Ross character increasingly seemed like a borderline psychopath.

• Neve Campbell and. her. halting way. of. talking.

• Julianne Moore was bloody awful on 30 Rock last year.

• Seriously?

• And what ugly looking hangdog expressions he gave, OP. He was unbearably annoying.

• Jerry Seinfeld. On.every.single.episode.

  You know it''s tragic when Michael Richards appears nuanced

• I agree with Seinfeld. Also the annoying voiced sidekick lady on Will & Grace.

• Elisabeth Rohm on Law and Order%0D\ %0D\ %0D\ %0D\ Angie Harmon on Law and Order

• Kyra Sedgwick on The Closer. It''s a bad southern accent, similar to Heath Ledger''s bad cowboy voice. Stupid hollywood nonsense that is embarrassing to watch.

• Jack Coleman on Dynasty. I was but a wee lad, but I knew horrid acting when I saw it. Made Joan Collins look like Streep herself.

• Lauren Bacall was over the top in the TV version of APPLAUSE. She was wonderful when she created the role on Broadway and won the Tony. On the small screen, she was just too much. The director needed to reel her in.

• But David Schwimmer was/is hot.

• DL favorite Bonnie Franklin owns this thread. Probably the worst long-running series actress EVER.

• Everyone on "Welcome Back Kotter" sucked. Gabe Kaplan was smirking at his own jokes the whole time.

• The two leads on Law and Order SVU. I know they''re favorite topics here but honestly I have never seen them give a decent performance on that show between them. She huffs and puffs and squints and tries to act like one of the guys - unconvincingly - and then sweet-talks a kid or rape victim. Then she uses the word "balls" with a sophomoric sneer in a scene with a rapist. \ \ He swaggers and tries to pretend like he gives a shit about anyone else on the screen with him, which he doesn''t. His tics and facial expressions number precisely three, and one of them is a smile that you see every fifth show, so you can guess what the other two are.\ \ It doesn''t help that the scripts have always been absolutely terrible, 100% of the time, year in and year out. And the hand-wringing intensity of the direction - eek. But those two are so bad the show never had a chance. It stays on because people like to see stories about sex crimes.

• [quote]It doesn''t help that the scripts have always been absolutely terrible, 100% of the time\ \ Agreed. So over the top, ham fisted, and preachy. And incredibly boring.

• David Schwimmer isn''t/wasn''t hot in the slightest.

• The kid who played DJ on Roseanne was semiretarded.\ \ Malcolm''s Muniz sucked. I don''t understand the quasi-deaf voiced delivery that passed for his exasperation.\ \ Mush-mouthed Rohme on Law & Order. (Whereas I loved Angie Harmon, that foxy dyke.)

• r12, I''ll see your Bonnie Franklin and raise you "Murphy Brown" herself, Candice Bergin. Just awful.\ \ Currently, I love "Modern Family" but the little chubby Hispanic kid is very consciously "acting."

• R17, I was going to post about DJ from Roseanne(Michael Fishman), too. He was terrible. It became more of a problem in the show''s later years, he was so awkward.

• Candice Bergen seems like the stereotypical humorless lesbian.

• Seems?

• Bergen wasn''t nearly as bad as Franklin, who I have to fully agree with R12. I remember someone saying that she even overacted doing something as simple as answering the door!

• Okay, I guess you got me there.\ \ Murphy Brown was one of the most boring TV shows of all time. I cannot imagine any person enjoying it.

• Irene Ryan, Nancy Kulp, and Donna Douglas

• Surprise Annal!

• "I''d offer David Schwimmer on "Friends." Not so much a performance as a collection of tics, hangdog expressions and occasional bursts of mania ("WE WERE ON A BREAAAAAAAK!"). It was never a good performance but it grew increasingly wretched in the last season or two of the show, where the Ross character increasingly seemed like a borderline psychopath."\ \ Why do you think they introduced the monkey?

• None of you ever watched The Love Boat? Lauren Tewes as Cruise Director Julie McCoy

• I thought Irene Ryan (Granny) was brilliant on THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES. Nancy Kulp and Donna Dixon played their parts well, too.

• Tiffany Brissette in SMALL WONDER gives not only the worst, but most ANNOYING performance in the annals of TV performances.

• Linda Lavin

• Nobody. Has mentioned. Horatio Caine?

  Adjusting my sunglasses as I type

• Yeah, don''t diss Granny and Miss Jane, especially.%0D\ %0D\ I offer Laura Prepon(?), who played Donna on "That Seventies Show."%0D\ %0D

• David Mendenhall, as the Webber kid, on the mid-1980s "General Hospital." Sylvester Stallone cast him in one of his late-1980s movies, "Over the Top" (I think), and he just didn''t have discipline and was very annoying.

• Oooh I forgot to add Tori Spelling to my list of bad Donnas.

• "I was but a wee lad, but I knew horrid acting when I saw it. "%0D\ %0D\ Oh, but you are so very special.

• Any kid with a bowl or dutch boy haircut, esp. if the child was brought in later in the series...

• How can no one have mentioned me yet? Or me?

  Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana

• I''ve always thought Gavin MacLeod was a weak link on The Mary Tyler Moore show.

• "Why do you think they introduced the monkey?"\ \ The monkey (Marcellus, I think his name was) was only in the first season R26.

• I am enjoying watching the dvds of "The Waltons" that I bought. Judy Norton Taylor, who played Mary Ellen, is pretty bad.

• David Duchovny in The X-Files was a revelation in one-note, emotionless acting.

• The first place in emotionless acting belongs to Julianna Margulies. She''s a terrible actress and it doesn''t help that she uses so much botox that her face looks like it''s set in stone.

• I always find it strange that people are always bagging on Elizabeth Rohm, but no one ever notes that Ice-T is the worst actor to ever appear on any of the Law & Orders ever.

• Andrew Shue in Melrose Place. Awful.

• Ali McGraw anytime she "livened" up a tv drama special\ \ Worst.\ \ Actress.\ \ Ever.

• #44 is correct (the rest of you just have axes to grind). Andrew is the worst ''actor'' to ever appear on a television program. In fact, he didn''t work for 10 years after the show ended.

  http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0795576/

• Candice Bergen! Beyond bad in every single performances she''s given.

• [quote]Ice-T is the worst actor to ever appear on any of the Law & Orders ever.\ \ I think he was outdone by Adam Beach.

• Katharine Ross in, well, anything. \ \ But I recall her wooden line readings from The Colby''s.

• Gavin MacLeod on "The Love Boat."

• Sigh, I''m so glad I don''t watch television.

  huge snob and proud of it

• David Caruso owns this thread.

• Hands down Jorja Fox is THE worst actress ever to be cast in a television series. Whose pussy was she licking to be cast on E.R., The West Wing and C.S.I.?? And to see her try to portray a heterosexual woman in love with the series'' lead was the ultimate bad joke!

  Billy Petersen

• "huge snob and proud of it"\ \ Yes, it''s such a badge of honor to allow your insecurities to render you absolutely insufferable. Well done!

• Wrong, R42!%0D\ %0D\ %0D\ Develop [italic]taste[/italic].

• "David Schwimmer was/is hot."%0D\ %0D\ David Schwimmer was/is ugly. And a bad actor. But he has the look that television writers, directors and producers identify with.

• You''re the one that is wrong, R55. Margulies is a wooden actress. The only thing saving her is the rest of the cast that hides her incompetence. She''s lucky she got a second shot at a tv series.

• Wrong, R57!%0D\ %0D\ Now get the fuck out, and leave [italic]R42[/italic] to be the one who responds to me.

  R55

• R55/R58 = fangurl%0D\ %0D\ R58, instead of crying and stomping your little feet while you type why don''t you explain why you think your opinion is right and everybody else is wrong? Your only response so far was tell a few posters that they are wrong.%0D\ %0D\ Oh, and Margulies sucks as an actress so you get the fuck out and go back to imdb with the rest of the fangurls.

• The Greenbush sisters who played Carrie Ingall''s on LHOTP.

• I''d vote for the guy who just played Lt Cable on that South Pacific broadcast.

• Any of the actors involved in the new TV version of The Deep, particularly James Nesbitt.

• Katherine Heigl, hate her with a passion and her breath stinks from all the smoking.%0D\ %0D\ Candace Bergen was awful on the unfunny "Murphy Brown" - Roseanne shoud''ve won more than one Emmy but she kept losing to this privileged witch. %0D\ %0D\ Jayne Mansfield''s daughter is very wooden (yet she has a sympathy Emmy). %0D\ %0D

• Melissa Gilbert is terrible on "Little House" and the remake of "Miracle Worker."

• DYNASTY remains a yardstick by which to measure atrocious TV acting. Some of it was what made the series fun. And some of it was just.... atrocious.

  Claudia''s Toni home perm

• Nancy Kulp only played one character no matter if she was in "Love That Bob," "Beverly Hillbillies," "Mr. Ed," "The Jack Benny Show," and every other "acting" job she managed to get.

• Disagree about D.J. Conner - Mike Fishman - he was very natural, funny and believable as a "special" child, he''s semi-retired from acting and married, I believe.

• Erin Moran, Scott Baio, Tom Bosley, Pat Morita, Anson Williams - the entire fucking Happy Days crew was absolutely terrible. And no one was worse than "The Fonz".

• Richard Deacon is the male version of Nancy Kulp - the same boring character over and over and over and over.

• The guy who played Chakotay on "Star Trek: Voyager" was excruciatingly bad.

• Another vote for Andrew Samonsky (Lt Cable) from the Live From Lincoln Center South Pacific.

• I never could understand why Candace Bergen won all those Emmys for Murphy Brown. I figured they cast that bald guy who played Frank Fontana because he was the only actor in Hollywood who was worse than she was.\ \ The most horrible child actor in the history of television was whoever/whatever played Dodie on the last seasons of "My Three Sons." I can''t even remember whether it was a he or a she it was so horribly androgynous--it was just creepy. It made both the Greenbush twins and the Olsen twins look like Lunt and Fontanne.

• Charlotte "Mrs Garrett" Rae from Facts of Life was consistently awful.

• That bitch Lassie was a one-note performer!

  Helen Lawson

• [quote] no one ever notes that Ice-T is the worst actor to ever appear on any of the Law & Orders ever.%0D\ %0D\ Because he hardly has any lines.

• Most child actors were horrible. Strangely Ron Howard was excellent as Opie on Andy Griffith, yet horrid in "Happy Days."

• Michaela McManus as Kim Greyleck

• Bonnie Franklin: "... I remember someone saying that she even overacted doing something as simple as answering the door!"%0D\ %0D\ She "ran" into every scene with this fake slo-mo jog. And then there was the matter of that sassy chin-lift whenever she was being adorably stubborn. %0D

  Julie''s crack pipe, down between the couch cushions

• r78, YES! She fucking RAN to answer the door in that tiny apartment every time there was a knock. It was, what, like TEN feet? Bizarre as hell. And everything was soooooo important and dramatic. "Dammit, Julie. Dammit Barbara." The worst TV actress of all time, not to mention her penis head hairdo and that gaping maw of a mouth.

• Plus she had a vagina chin, r79.

• Candice Bergen won all of those Emmys because she''s beautiful and because she''s Hollywood royalty. Roseanne, by contrast, was a fat, unattractive outsider, and behaved like a tyrant behind the scenes of her show. Hollywood just couldn''t get past that, even though Roseanne was a far superior show and Roseanne could act circles around Ms. Bergen.

• James Lafferty of One Tree Hill is Andrew Shue for a new generation.

• But if Roseanne didn''t behave like a ham-fisted tyrant on her show, it would''ve remained twee like the pilot and first few episodes. Instead, she demanded better scripts and got ''em, thus making the show one of the best sitcoms of all time. Who cares in retrospect? No one runs "Murphy" repeats, but "Roseanne"''s on all the time, and remains hysterical.

• George Clooney, always angry, ready to defend himself as a rebel, even in the middle of surgery.\ \ David Duchovney? Really? Anyone with eyes can see his talent...oh wait, that''s him naked. Sorry

• I think Roseanne would have won in 92, had Quayle not opened his stupid mouth and attacked Murphy Brown. That win was nothing but a sympathy vote for Murphy Brown. %0D\ %0D

• Timothy Hutton is the worst of the second rate actors in Leverage

• Roseanne could act circles around nobody, r81. Rin Tin Tin could act circles around Roseanne.%0D\ Francis the Talking Mule could act circles around Roseanne. Car 54 could act circles around Roseanne. Mister Ed could act circles around Roseanne. Puff the dragon could act circles around Roseanne. C-3PO could act circles around Roseanne. Trigger could act circles around Roseanne. The Pillsbury Doughboy could act circles around Roseanne.%0D\ Tony the Tiger could act circles around Roseanne.%0D\ %0D\ %0D\ OTOH, she had a wonderful way to alert the audience that a funny line was coming. She would laugh just before the line was delivered. It was our signal to laugh at the joke. %0D\ %0D

• WANT TO KNOW HOW TO PLAY COMEDY?%0D\ %0D\ SCREAM ALL YOUR LINES!%0D\ %0D\ THAT''S HOW TO PLAY COMEDY!

  Candace Bergin, TV comedy legend

• I always thought Isabelle Sanford from the Jefferson''s was a terrible actress. And so was most of the supporting cast. \ \ I think this is what got Marla Gibbs noticed even more than she really deserved to be. She was decent and had good comic timing, but compared to the rest of the buffoons on that show she became nearly epic.

• Yeah, Isabelle Sanford sounded like she was taking an elocution lesson every time she opened her mouth.

• Roseanne''s a great actress, can do seriously good work - did you ever see the episode where her dad died? Very touching and understated scene in the funeral home. She WAS Roseanne Conner and she''s very funny and sympathetic in "She Devil" and will delight critics and audiences in her new play coming to Broadway this fall.

  Scottina

• But that''s what made Isabel so HOOPY!

• r45! I was waiting for that response. I think Ali MacGraw is so beautiful but she is a terrible actress. Seeing her on Dynasty years ago, and although I was young(!), I realized i was watching one of the most wooden and dead performances I''d ever seen.

• Child star Danny Pintauro as Jonathan Bower on "Who''s the Boss?"%0D\ %0D\ Contrary to DL popular opinion, showing off his shitter was decidedly a step up:

  http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FR0SE42BbP0/SW37uQRCc1I/AAAAAAAAAQk/apJEkA8S-yY/s320/Pintauro_Danny_06_2007.jpg

• Roseanne really matured as an actress as her series progressed. And I remember seeing her in She-Devil when it came out and be pleasantly surprised. The critics fell all over themselves praising Meryl Streep, as per usual, but Roseanne gave the better performance.

• "Ali MacGraw is so beautiful but she is a terrible actress"%0D\ %0D\ Marrying Robert Evans and Steve McQueen were good career moves for her, apparently.

• I loved Roseanne, Scottina. Well, I should say I loved the first five seasons. But I wouldn''t call Roseanne a "great" actress. You said it yourself, she WAS Roseanne Conner -- the part was essentially an idealized version of herself. \ \ That being said, she definitely grew as an actress during the run of the show, and was fortunate to have actual great actors (John Goodman, Laurie Metcalf, Estelle Parsons) to play opposite and terrific scripts (in the early days) to work with.\ \ Jerry Seinfeld also had terrific scripts and an excellent supporting cast, but he never managed to become half the actor Roseanne did.

• Dylan McDermott on The Practice. Every single episode was him screaming in righteous indignation. It was like it was the only emotion he knew how to play.

• Bonnie Franklin closing her eyes every opportunity she got while expressing disagreement with Barbara, Julie, and especially ....Schneider!!%0D\ %0D\ The wife on Major Dad shaking her head in disapproval always trying to pull off Mary Richards when she damn well couldn''t even come up to Mare''s toes.%0D\ %0D\ Neve Campbell and her short gasps before every line in "Party Of Five"%0D\ %0D\ (notice all three bwere ex-dancers, hmmmm, all trying to imitate another dancer who could REALLY act, Mary Tyler Moore!)%0D\ %0D\ But the worst by far:%0D\ %0D\ Is this the [italic] ethics [italic/] committee? Cuz I have an [italic] ethics [italic/] complaint.

  Jada P. Smith

• Robert Wagner on Hart to Hart

• Ah FEEL...awl the TIIIME...lak a CAT on a...%0D\ %0D\ HOT. TIN. ROOF!!

  Jessica Lange''s hands

• Lucille Ball in both "Here''s Lucy" and "Life with Lucy." I caught one of these episodes recently and could not believe how terrible it was.

• You like me!! You REALLY LIKE me!!

  Bonnie Franklin

• Mr. Roper, mugging at the camera right after any punch line having to do with Jack''s gayness.%0D\ %0D\ But the muggers'' award goes to - all the extras on Saturday Night Live throughout the show''s 35 year history. %0D\ %0D\ They always make a point to be noticed. %0D\ %0D\ French and Saunders had two characters who were also mugging extras.

• [/italic]Jeeze, r99, learn how to use italics.

• "Rin Tin Tin could act circles around Roseanne. Francis the Talking Mule could act circles around Roseanne. Car 54 could act circles around Roseanne. Mister Ed could act circles around Roseanne."\ \ And this, my friends, is how to identify yourself as a crotchety old queen, stuck in the past and out of touch with even decades-old pop culture, when posting.\ \ Class dismissed.

• I think in the course of a long run, some actors do get better. Roseanne acquired some technique by the end of her series (it helped that she was surrounded by Laurie Metcalf and John Goodman, two of the best actors out there).\ \ Sela Ward was kind of awful in the first show she was in (Sisters), but by the end of the run, she was fairly respectable and got praise for that other show she was on (Once and Again? Time and Again?)\ \ Ice-T has also turned into a decent actor. He''s got to the point where he can carry an episode.\ \ On the other hand, I''ve never seen any real improvement in Juliana Margulies, and I''ve never really thought Chris Noth gave a damn in any of the shows I''ve seen him in. \ \ I feel bad for awful kid actors, because I assume they''re not there by choice, but I can''t wait until they grow up a little and leave the business. (Though that didn''t work with Scott Baio, who can play a little comedy, but still takes himself WAY too seriously).

• [italic]testing[/italic] [bold]one, two, three[/bold]

• [quote]Class dismissed.%0D\ %0D\ And this my friends, is how to identify yourself as a bitter snide queen who thinks she has a clever punch line to button her even more clever put-down remark.%0D\ %0D\ Go back to Christopher Street, Mary.%0D\ %0D\ Won''t even calll you Miss Thing because, what with it being an 80''s catch phrase, that would be too avant-guarde a statement for you.

  Not the rin Tin Tin poster, but someone who thinks he dont deserve r106 rhetoric

• [/italic] [/italic] [/italic/]One more time.[/italic] [/italic] [/italic] trying to end 99''s italics [/italic] [/italic/]

• I can''t believe no one has mentioned. . .drumroll, please. . .ANNIE POTTS. I''m watching the first season of "Designing Women" and she is horrible, shouting all her dialogue as if she''s in a theater (you have a mic over your head, Annie. No need to shout), uses these huge arm swings (your in a close-up, subtle works better) and stamps and stomps in a way that makes Bonnie Franklin--yeah, I''m about to say it bitches--look refined.

• r110 WTF????????? Italics ended right after r100. Mine was a typo, yours is, well, just ridiculous.

  r99

• R106, the ubiquity of old TV shows on cable/in the cosmos seems to have passed you by. Also, if someone is referring to decades-old pop culture, how does that show he or she is out of touch with it. Doesn''t it prove the opposite?\ \ Poor thing. Is that a class of dead mice lined up in the basement you''re talking to?

• I agree with those saying Roseanne Barr can act, although I don''t agree with the person that said she out-acted Meryl Streep in She Devil. Puhleeze! It''s a bad movie but Streep is the highlight, Roseanne did grow as an actress but she was still quite stiff when she filmed She Devil.\ \ Many of the Roseanne episodes leaned towards soap opera and they showed Roseanne could act, I''m surprised she has pursued more dramatic acting roles. She Devil killed her movie career, so that''s part of it.

• "It doesn''t help that the scripts have always been absolutely terrible, 100% of the time, year in and year out"%0D\ %0D\ %0D\ %0D\ %0D\ It sounds like you watch the show on a regular basis. Kinda funny since you claim to hate the show.

• And yet no one has thought of Raven Symone. If you think Bonnie Franlin over acts check the low life of an act. I don''t get why kids like the show. Her eyes pop with every word and she''s a bad actress really bad.

  Pickle

• That''s why kids like her, the bugged eyes make her look like a cartoon. BTW, why are there no cartoons on Sat. mornings on ABC or any decent ones on the other channels? God, just show some vintage Hanna-Barbera, like "Frankenstein Jr. & The IMpossibles!"

  Barks

• R116, all of those Disney "actors" are wretched. Just look at those damned Sprouse twins. Ugh.

• We have the winners.\ \ \ Unlike Roseanne, neither Candace Bergen, nor Jerry Seinfeld could manage to improve over nine or TEN seasons! They both give horrible, loud, wind up toy performances in every episode. Even as a young adult, I noticed how embarrassingly lousy Bergen was the first time I saw the show. Sadly, the rest of the cast had to act even WORSE to make Murphy look good! How did it ever run!?

• It was the 80s and it was considered timely and Candice had never done a t.v. series before. "Roseanne" holds up so much better.

  Scottina

• Hey guys, lighten up on Shanna Reed aka the wife from "Major Dad" she happens to love reading the DL.

  Friend of Shanna''s

• r104 -%0D\ %0D\ This French & Saunders scetch?

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9d5vDm915SI

• Maybe I looked through this thread too quickly, but I can''t believe no one has yet to mention Fran Drescher.

  The Nanny

• r122 - yes, among many others. They are recurring characters in different sketches. My favorite is one in which they are extras in a huge live production of Carmen, the opera.

• Here we go

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNksf8ByPXg&feature=related

• Susan Crough of "The Partridge Family" and Dee Thomas of "What''s Happening." Awful.

• Should be Suzanne Crough. She was so bad, I''ve been trying to forget her name.

  R126

• Debra (The New Lucille Ball) Messing....refined the Marjorie Lord acting method.....say something funny and then pull the corners of your mouth down to let us know you just broke yourself up by being HIGH-larious.%0D\ %0D\ Of course, Marjorie was attractive which helped...Messing not so much.

  Rusty Hammer - it''s a joke

• While I enjoyed Murphy Brown while it was on (it seems pretty bad to me now), I''ll have to admit that Bergen was a pretty bad actress. Somehow it didn''t bother me at the time. Her character was a loud-mouthed journalist, so I just pretended I was watching the day-to-day goings on of an actual journalist, who would, naturally, not be a good actress. But, again, she was bad.\ \ Sort of the same thing for Seinfeld, but even more so. Bergen is an actual actress (well, sort of), Seinfeld isn''t. With the strong scripts and the great supporting cast in an ensemble effort, it never bothered me that Seinfeld himself couldn''t act. It just worked. He seemed to be playing it completely tongue in cheek and it worked for me. I still find Seinfeld funny, no so Murphy Brown.

• Terrible performances all around!!!!

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4cCHgBfnaAM&feature=channel

  You take the bad, la la la la

• "Pot makes you so creative.."

  A Young Helen Hunt in last clip

• Vincent D''Onofrio''s overwrought, creepy hamminess on Law & Order, Criminal Intent deserves a mention.

• One. Hundred. Thirty-one replies..and. NO ONE..mentioned..ME?

  William Shatner

• Because Billy C, honey, you are very lovable, you don''t take yourself seriously, and the first one to ridicule your acting is ... you.%0D\ %0D\ How can we bitch on about the bitchiest butch bitch of them all? Or let alone be mad at you?

  Dr. Cock

• Where to begin?\ \ Helen Hunt - while I can deal with her in dramatic roles, she was so awful in Mad About You. Said every line with this horrible worried look on her face that was supposed to read funny, apparently. One of the least funny actresses on a sitcom. Also, not believable in the role.\ \ LA Law had some bad performances. The Roxane Melman actress said all her lines like a spoiled child. Also, I hated Gwen - Sheila Kelley could barely handle standing there and looking pretty.\ \ Randy Harrison on QAF. Surprising he landed a series. Could not hold his own with the other players

• I don''t know, R130. I think Hilary Horan did a fine job as "Tumpy".

  Natalie Green

• I could not watch "Three''s Company" because of John Ritter''s performance. His ham fisted constant mugging was beyond irritating.\ \ Also, any program with Sammy Davis Jr as a guest star. He made many appearances in everything from "All in the Family to Kojack. Always playing himself with the grace of a paper shredder.

• Finding a good performance on TV is harder than finding a terrible one.

• Funny how a lot of shows from the 1990s are still in syndication, but not "Mad About You."

• [quote]and I''ve never really thought Chris Noth gave a damn in any of the shows I''ve seen him in. %0D\ %0D\ You''re so right, R107. The ONLY time I''ve thought Noth didn''t come off as smug and self-satisfied (or plain bored) was in S1 of L&O, when he was partnered with George Dzundza (a very good actor who clearly started hating his gig midway through the season). Noth and Dzundza had chemistry I''ve never seen Noth have with any other actor, male or female. They may have hated each other, but I thought they clicked onscreen.%0D\ %0D\ And R48, ITA about Beach. The worst part for me was he always sounded like a person with bad denture problems. Taryn Manning has the same issue. Positively painful to watch/listen to.%0D\ %0D

• [quote]I could not watch "Three''s Company" because of John Ritter''s performance. %0D\ %0D\ How pathetic that that''s the only reason you couldn''t watch that awful show.

• Where did that Danny Pintauro nude pic come from?

• Manhunt, R142.

• Has no one heard of the Franklin Award? The eponymous honor was given one time only and then retired as the likelyhood of finding a more deserving winner was less than a positive paternity test.%0D\ %0D\ La Franklin (with McKenzie Phillips frisking at her heels)invented her own jandra.

• r144, does jandra = genre? Is this a new DL malapropism (a la pron, cak, WHET et al) that I missed?

• There is and was nothing hot about David Schwimmer. And not only is he ugly and untalented, but he''s also an asshole. The trifecta.

• Yes, 145----"jandra" is an adopted malapropism that stretches waaay back to Bo Bice''s season on "American Idol."%0D\ %0D\ A posted typed "jandra" instead of "genre," and hilarity ensued.

• Agggggh. I meant "poster," not "posted."%0D\ %0D

  R147

• "Randy Harrison on QAF. Surprising he landed a series. Could not hold his own with the other players"%0D\ %0D\ %0D\ %0D\ He held his own just fine, since most of the other actors were equally bad. Gale Harold and especially Hal Sparks were awful.%0D\ %0D

• John Lithgow in 3rd Rock from the Sun owns this thread.\ \ I still can''t believe he won Emmys for a "performance" that showcased more mugging than Central Park at night.

• The funny thing about Danny Pintauro is he would qualify for "Annals of Terrible TV Performances," as well as "Anals of Terrible TV Performances."

  Tony Danza

• Surprise Annals?

• Worst ever is ANY line ever uttered by Elizabeth Rohm on Law and Order

  AMS

• Kristin Kreuk in anything

• Holly Marie Combs. Wooden.

• Jack Coleman in Dynasty, and Andrew Shue in Melrose Place. They made their co-stars performances seem award-winning in comparison.

  Diana%20Canova

• I now own this thread, bitches!! Gotta go now, those vodka bottles are not gonna drink themselves!

  Lindsay%20Lohan%20channeling%20Liz%20Taylor

• Jaclyn Smith, thread closed. She's played an angel, saint and hooker on Tv and they were all uniquely Jaclyn.

• 150, he acknowledged his own mugging, but, really, how else was he supposed to play the character?

• I agree with R159. John Lithgow was great on 3rd Rock.The characters were aliens who were completely clueless about normal human interaction, so his interpretation of the character was perfect.

• [quote] I always thought Isabelle Sanford from the Jefferson's was a terrible actress. And so was most of the supporting cast. The guy who was on that show who'd been the painter on Sesame Street was also horrid. He was creepy looking and was supposed to be Australian. They turned his character from an Australian to an Englishman because he couldn't do an Australan accent. He just managed to scrape by with what sounded vaguely like a British accent to American ears.

• It's a new day of bad TV acting. Whitney Cummings, in her sitcom, has mastered the art of telegraphing "funny" before and after every line she delivers. The brunette chick on "Two Broke Girls" does the same thing, but at least manages to pretend to act. And people are actually watching "Two Broke Girls," unlike "Whitney."

• [quote]WANT TO KNOW HOW TO PLAY COMEDY? SCREAM ALL YOUR LINES! THAT'S HOW TO PLAY COMEDY! by: Candace Bergin, TV comedy legend Oh c'mon, the screaming started with All in the Family and didn't let up until those cheap Lear-inspired sit-coms went to the big TV set in the sky.

• Hilarie Burton in a One Tree Hill episode written by Chad Michael Murray. Yes, imagine that. The whole episode, which was set in the 1930s for no particular reason, was execrable. Just a compendium of cliches and vanity. But there was one scene on a bridge that manages to stand out for the most wretchedness. While twirling around on a bridge, Burton delivered a line that made me burst into laughter. It was a line reading worse than anything I had ever heard in community theater.

• CW shows do not count. If you allow that, we may as well start including elementary school productions.

• R165 How droll.

• Everyone on "3rd Rock From The Sun". God, I hated that show.

  Twentysomething

• I enjoyed Kirsten Johnston and Jane Curton on 3rd Rock; Lithgow I wanted to smash with a brick.

• I mostly agree with R168. Jane Curtin was fairly good, as was Kristen Johnston. Lithgow, French, and yes, Joseph Gordon-Levitt were totally execrable.

• No love for the great Ms. Paz de la Huerta? That counts as acting, right? On the subject of John Lithgow, I remember reading some article grousing about his Emmy win, saying, "It's supposed to be an award for the best acting, not the most acting."

• David Caruso not only owns this thread but gets a Life Achievement Award for every godawful performance he's ever given.

• Although I am a big fan of the show, sometimes Vincent D'Onofrio's acting on "Law & Order: CI" bordered on the hammy. It was almost as if the director could not rein him in.

• [quote]Jaclyn Smith, thread closed. She's played an angel, saint and hooker on Tv and they were all uniquely Jaclyn. You are so right sir. She was horrible in pretty much everything that she did. She had the gall to portray Florence Nightingale in an NBC miniseries. Her English "accent" came and went and she was about as emotive as an algae-covered rock.

• The entire cast of Full House

• Howard Rosenberg of the LA Times did a column about Jaclyn Smith years back that was so bitchy, you'd have thought he was a regular on DL. His headline: "A Clone Again, Naturally."

  http://articles.latimes.com/1992-01-08/entertainment/ca-1462_1_jaclyn-smith

• LOL R175. Great read. [quote]She had been only slightly less cool and composed in 1983 as the besieged hotshot lawyer of NBC's "Rage of Angels," a role she reprised three years later in "Rage of Angels: The Story Continues." Undoubtedly, she would have come across as even more inert in these miniseries had she not been hindered by lines ("Please, don't hurt me") that required movement of her lips.

• [quote]Neve Campbell and. her. halting way. of. talking. ...and the mini gasps before each sentence. Used to drive me crazy. Eyes closed for half of her line deliveries didn't help either. Moving on. The woman who played Major Dad's wife would constantly "vibrate" her head in exasperation - perhaps in a feeble attempt to channel Mary Richards, Anne Romano, and every cocky character Tom Cruise has ever played? In any case, it did her no good. She was awful.

• There are sooo many. Threes Company sucked out loud. Full House, and any other show that had a studio audience that gave a collective Auhhhhhh, blew chunks.

• Has no one mentioned William Shatner?

• Marc Copage, Diahann Carroll's son on Julia. Could not understand a single word he said.

• [quote]Law & Order SVU... It stays on because people like to see stories about sex crimes. No, it stayed on initially because people liked to tune in to see Chris Meloni's hot ass

  http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ma1f0bJkkd1rsfrkmo1_400.jpg

• [quote] more mugging than Central Park at night. Well if this in itself isn't a throwback to eighties-type punchlines! BTW, here in the 21st Century, Central Park is pretty lit and secure - while it's still open - at night. You probably think anything above 86th street is poverty -stricken and dangerous. [quote]Has no one mentioned William Shatner? Yes. Over two years ago, when this thread started. Not to worry, you're not the only one wandering about confused - I thought it was a fairly new thread and found myself answering the very exact same thing I answered two years ago, and not even remembering I had done so. It was only when I decided to dig back for cute answers that everything started clicking.

• Bonnie Franklin - I get that she was a stage "actress" before being cast on ODaaT, but all that over emoting, arm swinging, finger snapping, UGH. Candice Bergen - She was the weakest link on Murphy Brown Elisabeth Rohm on Law & Order - Obviously sucked a few dicks to get (and keep) the job Miley Cyrus - No comments needed David Caruso - He must have video of an NCIS producer blowing a goat Roseanne - OMG, the way she would LAUGH AT HER OWN LINES Bob Saget and idiot on Full House who made the "funny" voices.

• The dead junkie, Glenn Quinn, from Roseanne. Besides having the charisma of an unflavored rice cake, his attempt at an American accent was just tragic. When bad actors try to fake an accent, they always mumble and talk quietly, hoping the audience doesn't notice. And that's what Quinn did every time he opened his mouth.

• "Full House" was the television equivalent of a root canal.

• [quote]Roseanne - OMG, the way she would LAUGH AT HER OWN LINES She got much better as the show went on. In later seasons she was very good in fact, able to bring the drama as well as the comedy when needed. An episode that sticks out in my mind is the one where DJ stole a car, and she hit him out of anger. Roseanne had to confront her own demons from being hit as a child, and the scene where she apologizes to DJ at the kitchen table is heartbreaking.

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nsixUXzoR6w

• "No love for the great Ms. Paz de la Huerta? That counts as acting, right?" She pretty much owns this thread. "Hilarie Burton in a One Tree Hill episode written by Chad Michael Murray. Yes, imagine that" She's on White Collar now and hasn't gotten any better

• [quote]But David Schwimmer was/is hot. Shit, that's disgustingly low even by the usual DL white queen standards.

• Please say someone mentioned that Fez creature from "That 70's Show". Actually, all of them are unwatchable.

• From the kids' archives, that Rodriguez kid in "Modern Family" is like nails on a chalkboard. No matter what the mood or tone of the conversation is SUPPOSED to be, he sounds like he's reading from an instruction manual. He must have good memorizing/retention skills and maybe that's why they give him such lengthy material. It can't be because he delivers it well. His "partner in crime" (the other boy in the show - a natural slurrer who always sounds drunk or high) is not that much better but at least he doesn't get monologues assigned.

  Lily Tucker - The next Michelle Tanner, catch phrases/adult quips and all.

• Laura Prepon. Just awful.

• A-men, {181} ! Personally, I'd tune in to watch him walk around the set and read the phone book. Is it too late to enter Estelle Getty ? I can't find ANYthing that she was ever in that you couldn't practically see her reading her lines from cards.

  In%20Stabler%27s%20stable.

• R186 - I watched that clip; Roseanne wasn't half bad and she looked great! A lot slimmer and her face - plastic surgery? Part of the reason I never watched that show was because I found it depressing and because I loathe John Goodman (I met him once IRL and he was an utter PRICK).

• All the kids from "That '70s Show" were excruciating and clumsy to watch. And herein lies the shows best quality: it was so much fun to watch Red (gifted character actor Kurtwood Smith from Robocop) completely out-act the entire rest of the cast in every scene he was in. The acting talent disparity between Red and the kids was almost awe-inspiring.

  SickEvilFuck

• There are people whom you dislike on TV, and there are people who can't act. I think a few of you are mixing the two up. You may hate Wilmer Valderrama ("Fez" on THAT 70s SHOW), and God knows I'm not too fond of that smug little prick myself; but he _can_ act. So could most of the kids on THAT 70s SHOW (with the exception of Laura Prepon), although their TV characters' personae were often unlikable, and some of them are similarly unlikable offscreen (like Topher Grace). People on TV who genuinely couldn't act: *Candice Bergen. She actually can be funny, but she can't act. Those are two different skills. *Roseanne on the first season and a half of ROSEANNE. She was absolutely godawful: she cheated too much to the camera, and smiled during her punchlines and John Goodman's. To her credit, she learned on the job FAST and was terrific by the year she won the Emmy. *The Olsen twins, and also Stephanie Sweet on FULL HOUSE. To the Olsen twins' credit, they were under five when they were asked first to deliver lines on TV; but they were no better as they got older and did that show with Chris Siebert (and also, Raven-Symone was an accomplished child actress when she was under 5 on THE COSBY SHOW). *Melissa Gilbert on LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE during its first five or six years. Both Allison Arngrim and Melissa Sue Anderson were, in comparison, accomplished child actors from the beginning, and Matthew Laborteaux was genuinely terrific from the outset of his stint on the show; Melissa Gilbert only got better the year they brought in Manly and Eliza Jane. Her brother Jonathan Gilbert (as Willie) was always unable to act. *Jerry Seinfeld. The other three actors and the fabulous guests stars could actually act, but he couldn't. Like Candice Bergen, he can be funny though. *Sarah Michelle Gellar. She couldn't act during her BUFFY years, and, to compensate, she picked up this. Annoying habit. Of putting pauses. In unexpected. Places in her speeches that. She learned from Alyson. Hannigan who could. Make it work. Even if. SMG couldn't. *David Duchovny. He just can't act.

• I think the trophy should be split between Andrew Shue of "Melrose Place" and Dawn Lyn of "My Three Sons."

• [quote][R186] - I watched that clip; Roseanne wasn't half bad and she looked great! A lot slimmer and her face - plastic surgery? Part of the reason I never watched that show was because I found it depressing and because I loathe John Goodman (I met him once IRL and he was an utter PRICK). Yeah, I think that was the season after she'd had a face lift and a boob lift. She did look good, and the long dark hair suited her. So Goodman was a dick, eh? He seems to be a very...intense guy.