The Ultimate "Small Wonder" Thread

Listen up, fucktards. If you goddamned motherfucking assholes don't start responding to this thread, I'm going to track your shitty asses down and make your lives a fucking hell. And believe me, I have the goddamned free time to do it!

Quite possibly the worst sitcom in the history of television. And I'm old enough to remember "My Mother, the Car," so that's saying something.

Was the dad hot?

The dad read as hugely gay to me, with his bleached 80s hair.

I'm pretty much the only one left standing from that shit show.

I liked Small Wonder. It was a cheap show but when I was a child, I found it very entertaining. However, now that I'm in my 40's, I can't imagine what it would be like to watch it today.

r4, Edie, stop lying about your age. You were born in 1945, not 1951. Your college yearbooks are online and there's no way you were 14 and in college in 1965.

[quote]The dad read as hugely gay to me, with his bleached 80s hair.

I used to think the dad looked cute and fuckable.

Like father, like son.

That boy was as gay as a bowl of fruity pebbles.

There's a reason the show was in first run syndication and not network.

[quote]There's a reason the show was in first run syndication and not network.

Even in first-run syndication, there were better shows.

[quote]That boy was as gay as a bowl of fruity pebbles.

And now he's homeless and living under a bridge in California somewhere.

For r11 and Small Wonder lovers/haters everywhere:

At any point in the four years this show was on the air did anyone on the writing team ever stop to think, "how are we going to explain how a robot girl can grow and go through puberty?"

Love it! It's so incredibly awful on all levels, but it all adds up to a fun show for me. It's currently running on Saturdays in the NYC area.

r13- i think they explained the growing as "upgrades". Crazy to think that the show lasted FOUR seasons. The writers had be serious drug users.

[quote]At any point in the four years this show was on the air did anyone on the writing team ever stop to think, "how are we going to explain how a robot girl can grow and go through puberty?"

Shouldn't that be.... At any point in the four years this show was on the air did anyone on the writing team ever stop to think AT ALL?

[quote]The writers had be serious drug users.

Sitcom writers? Using DRUGS? You've GOT to be kidding!

It would make for an interesting movie. Parody, perversion, prognostication...

[quote]It would make for an interesting movie.

It already did. Oh, wait, you said an INTERESTING movie. Sorry, I misready you.

Remarkably even the bloopers aren't funny.

Marla Pennington was actually pretty good on [italic]Soap[/italic] as Billy's teacher-turned-girlfriend-turned-scorned-ex-lover-turned-terrorist.

Dad was the original AWG.

[quote]Dad was the original AWG.

Excuse me?

Great show to watch stoned. I recently discovered it on Antenna. Anyone who wants to see firsthand the creepiness of 80's Cold War ra-ra Reaganomics should watch the episode with the Russian boy robot.

It was a satire about what happens when you take Ritalin.

Jerry Supiran's Twitter hasn't been updated since 2011. Not a good sign.

Isn't he on a soap now?

Link at r12 contains a most unsettling Vicki Halloween costume that I wish I could unsee.

The Small Wonder/Battlestar Galactica ad spot mashup is pure genius, though.

The adult actors who played the parents must have felt like killing themselves every day they came to work.

Did they try to find the uglies little girl ever?

Alright, you fucknuts. If you think I'm letting you let this thread die after only 30 goddamned responses, you've got another thing coming. Keep the fucking tea flowing, or I'll have to start making up stories about Marla touching me down there. Someone has got to know some shit on that phony-ass Emily Schulman. She was in Troop Beverly Hills, fercrissakes.

R20, that was awful!

Tiffany Brissette 4 years ago.

Vicki looks surprisingly not horrifying, r33. I want to see Harriet now. I do not hold out the same hope for her.

Harriet is also surprisingly not horrifying

The son, Jamie is a mess.

Harriet's dad always struck me as a perv who would be really twisted in bed.

I had sex with Vicki and she short-circuited me!

Best hairstyle in televison history:

i retaard, dont no how post picks

This is the kind of thing Tim & Eric from Adult Swim specialize in. Except this is pure, raw and uncut.

The show's dynamic was steeped in luciferian transhumanism agendas. Artificial life used for degraded servitude and exploitation, down to the humiliating uniform. Yes, I assumed the father was interested in child android sexual exploitation - it was in the mix.

I see a big budget reboot by Guillermo Del Toro - with Vicki realizing her plight and summarily executing her exploiters with laser-tipped fingers, death ray eyes, etc. She goes on the run, but she'll never be free. Until she launches herself into space.

Vicki's dress was ridiculous, even by 80s standards. It looked like something Shirley Temple would wear to a Quinceañera.

R41, I would finance that in a heartbeat, but I want to see the original cast incinerated by Vicki. It seems Jaime would be available to get the ball rolling. I would not mind a single season of this on Netflix either. If they can bring back Full House...

As a DL member, well connected to the matrix-like simulacrum, I say she fits right in.

No one's posted this yet??

I'm actually watching this now and I've observed several things:

—At least they're throwing shade at tobacco instead of weed. —The father wears blue to bed and the mother wears pink. In spite of that, the father must be the queeniest closet queen who ever queened. Seriously, he makes Jim J. Bullock look like Mr. T! I imagine he must be sucking a lot of cock in the bathroom stalls at his job. And if Dick Christie isn't family, I'll eat my hair ribbons. —Harriet is a stalker by the same logic that Steve Urkel is also one. Too bad for Jamie that [italic]Fatal Attraction[/italic] was a year away. —Which Bette Davis movie are they talking about?

[quote]Vicki

It was VICI, bitches.

Voice Input Child Identicant

And you just know both Jamie and the Dad would have been sticking it in Vici (if they hadn't been gay and sticking it in one another).

Was there a reason they had the name of the show at the beginning of every act?

The more I get sucked into this show's consistent-but-demented internal logic (godDAMN you YouTube!), I wondered about this:

—Ted Lawson is not only gay, but a cross-dresser as well. I bet Joan doesn't have any unstretched pairs of pantyhose.

—How was this show any worse than any of the other low-budget gimmick/fantasy sitcoms of the area? [italic]ALF[/italic] was the only one that was good enough for the networks, but that had Jerry Stahl and a bunch of people who later wrote for [italic]The Simpsons[/italic]. But what about the other first-run syndicated fantasy shows; were they better or worse?

—They have a fat redheaded kid named Warren who looks just like the fat redheaded kid on [italic]Fresh off the Boat[/italic].

R20's clip is disturbing.

At 01:17, Ted laughs and places his head in Vici's gash.

[quote]At any point in the four years this show was on the air did anyone on the writing team ever stop to think, "how are we going to explain how a robot girl can grow and go through puberty?"

They explained that on the show if you were paying attention. With a turn of a dial, Vicki can grow big. Turn the dial the other way and Vicki shrinks. They had her shrink down into the size of a mouse.

R39!!!!!!! That child stole my hairstyle!!!!! Even children are out to destroy me and my career.

[quote]Listen up, fucktards. If you goddamned motherfucking assholes don't start responding to this thread, I'm going to track your shitty asses down and make your lives a fucking hell. And believe me, I have the goddamned free time to do it!

Dear Tiffany-

I like the cut of your jib, motherfucker!

Love-

Miyoshi

[quote]And you just know both Jamie and the Dad would have been sticking it in Vici (if they hadn't been gay and sticking it in one another).

In R20's link, the 'Dad' buries his face in her crotch:

[quote]There's a reason the show was in first run syndication and not network.

What does that mean? I never understood what 'in syndication' meant.

[quote]Vicki's dress was ridiculous, even by 80s standards. It looked like something Shirley Temple would wear to a Quinceañera.

Temple's hemlines would've been much shorter. Seriously, they dressed her in these micro-mini-dresses. In this scene from BRIGHT EYES, 6-year-old Shirley sings "On the Good Ship Lollipop" in a tiny, little dress, while a carload of grown men ogles her.

[quote]Temple's hemlines would've been much shorter. Seriously, they dressed her in these micro-mini-dresses. In this scene from BRIGHT EYES, 6-year-old Shirley sings "On the Good Ship Lollipop" in a tiny, little dress, while a carload of grown men ogles her.

I'll be starting work on a remake, just as soon as I finsh masturbating.

It seems Dick Christie is still working as an actor on [italic]The Bold and the Beautiful." IMDb makes no mention of a spouse or children.

[/italic]I get the sense VICI is a metaphor for a high-functioning autistic child: she repeats what humans say and copies it practically verbatim, right down to the tone of voice. Am I alone in sensing this?

R60 she wasn't autistic; she was a robot. That fact has been well-established in this thread. #readingcomprehensionskills

R61 doesn't understand the concept of metaphor and apparently has very little experience in the field of mental health, yet has the nerve to critique the reading comprehension skills of others? Now THAT'S funny!

Girls, girls -- you're both triggered.

R63: Speaking of which, here's an interview with the show's producer, Howard Leeds, who was credited as a "developer" on [italic]The Facts of Life[/italic].

The show could be incredibly disturbing at times.

Between Jamie on this show, Wesley on [italic]Mr. Belvedere[/italic], and, of course, Bart Simpson, you start to wonder why so many 20th Century Fox-produced sitcoms seem to be built around the idea that all 10-year-old boys are shiftless, belligerent brats.

Based on the names dropped, this episode was made just for Dataloungers:

Jamie was my fat ass bitch!

Holy shit. Scroll to the end of this episode, and Harriet and Vicki are singing "Reg and Jamie, your business we will steal 'cause we've got looks and we've got brains and we've got sex appeal." Um, they're sixth-graders. And if Reg and Jamie had been singing those lyrics to Harriet and Vicki, the FBI would have raided the studio.

Fuckin' lying ass show.

She only makes my heart beat once.

She's a whorish wonder, rife with most STDs.

She's a whorish wonder, a girl so easy to please.

She's has AIDS, she'll infect you

She'll expect to

To pay

She's a whorish wonder, and she'll is quite the lay

It's a front for her cunt

A slut and pure trash

She's a whorish wonder brings love and laughter for some cash

God bless you, R71.

Vici's greatest hits part 1

Vici's greatest hits part 2

Small wonder what were you thinking

More

I loved small wonder but but who remembers the other show "Out of this world" from the same time period about teenaged Evie who can freeze time by touching her fingers together? Her mother was played by DL fave Donna Pescow. Her extra terrestrial father was voiced by Burt Reynolds and her boyfriend was played by young pre general hospital hunk Steve Burton.

Did it get any more bizarre...................VICI on speed?

What was the weirdest decade for movies, TV and music? 70's, 80's, or 90's? I pick 80's

R47 that's true. However, she was credited as 'Vicki" and that's how her name was written on the show by the other characters.